Heartbeats (Innocent Series Book 5)
Page 6
“That I’m screwing around with my best friends’ jobs, and I’m an idiot, and—”
Oh crap. “Jacob, it’s not like that at all, I promise. I was serious—if something… If it ever goes wrong between us, you’ll all keep your job. How could I replace you? Come on.”
His eyes were narrowing in that way they did when he was about to call me Miss. “Maybe I should get that in writing.”
“Okay, buddy,” I said, my body crackling with impatience even as I gave him my best eye roll. “First of all, you probably should just let me make your contracts in future, because you’re just not as good at negotiating as I am, and second, I’m not trying to—” I almost said ‘break up with you.’ He’d feel like I’d been around Todd for too long. “I won’t do that.”
“Mmm.” That sound made me roll my eyes too.
“I’m a virgin, Jacob.” I waved my hands in the air with a fake smile on my face. “Surprise!”
This expression was a little bit like the one I loved so much, except that it was just wide open eyes and no smile at all. His face snapped back an inch, as if I’d said something ridiculous, too absurd to be believed. “Kayla—” He broke off, then leaned forward again and looked me in the eye. “How?”
“How?” I frowned at him, trying not to laugh, at this point. He looked so confused.
“I mean how? How could you possibly be a virgin?” Jacob reared back again and shook his head as if this were too crazy.
“I’m eighteen, not a hundred and four, like you, and I… I never met anyone that I liked, who liked me.” I swallowed and continued. “I’ve never even been kissed before, if we’re taking it there.”
Jacob’s eyes opened so wide that I did laugh that time. “No way.”
“Yes way, cowboy.”
“How is this possible?” He sounded like he was talking to himself. “I can’t be this tired. I’m not dreaming, am I?”
“Is this the kind of thing you dream about?” It was my turn to narrow my eyes.
Jacob searched my eyes for a moment, and I tried to be serious for him, but it was hard. Finally, he cupped my face. “I would dream about you, Kayla, if you were a virgin, if you were my wife, if you were just a girl in a video. You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, and even though I never have before, I will dream about you every night for the rest of my life.”
There’s nothing to say to something like that, so I didn’t. I kissed him again.
~~~
Jacob
I needed to stop underestimating this girl.
I needed to stop trying to protect someone so smart that she knew what she wanted and how to get it when she was only fourteen years old. I needed to let her tell me how to take care of her.
And also… I just needed her.
She could take her time; she could initiate this relationship and she could end it, too, she could figure out what she needed from life as she grew and changed and I would be there, the whole time, however she needed me.
Because I understood something very clearly, something primal, when Kayla told me she was a virgin. I wanted to be the man that she ended up with. I wanted to be inside of her, I wanted to create children with her, I wanted Kayla completely and forever, and I knew that she was the one who would decide, when, how, and if that would happen.
But she was the one for me. It gave me a strange sort of peace, realizing that.
Was I going to kiss this girl and want to kiss someone else, ever? Was I going to kiss this girl, a girl that made me wonder if god looked inside of my head and made her, just for me, and then turn around and find some second-rate substitute?
No. Not likely.
So I was going to make peace with the rest of it, too. Because I knew better than to try and guide her choices. She was her own woman. She’d tell me what she wanted to do.
And I’d do it.
Kayla kissed me, and I felt the heat of my desire run through me like an electrical current. I carefully stroked her arms, her hair, and let her guide the kiss, taking it deeper when she pushed, giving her my tongue to suck as my lips sank into hers. She tasted so sweet… I couldn’t help thinking of how other places might taste, how she would feel if I… I started to pull back, trying to get myself under control, and Kayla ran her nails over my back, through my shirt, as if asking me not to. I put my hands around her waist and pulled her to me.
She was so slender, just balancing there, that I could hold her up with one hand. I let her weight settle on my thighs, making sure to avoid the hard place that was practically begging for her. No need for that yet. I let one hand spread across her spine, supporting her, while my other hand began to gently explore her body. Just her legs—soft, smooth as silk, and miles long… Then over the fabric and back to her throat, tracing her collarbone… I slid lower, waiting for her to guide me back, then took what I wanted when she didn’t. I cupped her breast, teasing the underside and then resting my thumb on her nipple. She sighed into our kiss, and I slid her closer so that I could reach her with my mouth; I kissed her again, slowly, then licked down her throat and found the stiff little peak with my tongue through the fabric as my hand brought her breast up to meet me from below. She inhaled sharply as I stroked it with my teeth, the fabric pulling over the bud. I felt her legs open as she arched her back, pushing into my mouth, and I slid my hand lower again, feeling the smooth skin of her thigh as I played with the edge of her shirt. I could only bear to wait a minute before I slipped my hand under and slid my fingertips across the skin of her belly, up and along the underside of her breast. Jesus. She was soft everywhere. I pulled my hands back and squared them on her hips, then met her eyes. Her pupils were dilated, her breath coming in fast pants.
“I’m taking this off,” I whispered, “and you tell me when you want me to stop, because otherwise, I won’t.”
She nodded after a second, biting her lip, and I slid the shirt over her head. Her ponytail came loose and tresses of thick, gorgeous sandy blonde hair spilled all over, before I brushed them back so I could see her. Finally.
Kayla started to cover her breasts with her hands, then stopped herself. She met my gaze, then watched as I let my eyes wander over every perfect part of her body, her slightly parted lips, the long column of her throat, those beautiful collarbones, and then lower, to the breasts I’d just felt with my hands. So supple and round, they’d been hidden by her costume, although it never seemed like it. They were smaller, rounder, higher, perfect, capped by a delicious nipple so pale pink I knew when I teased them into hard nubs they would turn a delicious flush of fuchsia. Her skin was the color of a new peach and delicate, with a smattering of freckles dusted over her hidden parts; her torso was long and hard, leading down to a tiny thatch of downy hair pointed towards the sliver in her center. I wanted to lick every inch of that skin, to taste the backs of her knees, the inside of her forearm, the crack of her ass. “Hang on,” I said, and picked her up, feeling her legs wrap around my waist as I carried her back to my room. My room, my bed—where I would claim her, this little perfect dream of a woman, where I would embed myself in her the same way she was buried in my soul. I laid Kayla down on the bed and the view only improved; for a moment she was still shy, just a second, and then, very slowly, she bent her knees and allowed me to see more of her, the tiny pink opening below where only I was welcome. I knelt on the bed, pulling my own shirt off; I’d wait to take off the rest, see if she was ready. If I could make her ready, with my hands, my mouth. I hovered over her body for a long moment, looking down at the acres of legs I’d been trying so hard not to enjoy, and heard myself groan with pleasure before I set to work tasting as much of her as I could—her breasts, those delicate nipples, sucked till she gasped, each one of her freckles, from chest to hipbone to long, lovely thigh, from her toes to her earlobe, I worked over that skin. I’d leave the back for later. Her legs were still open for me, so I moved down, burying my nose in that little stripe of tawny hair and inhaling the scent of her as my tongue gently expl
ored the territory below. Kayla’s whole body was hot—she felt like she had a fever, and before long a fine sheen of sweat appeared on her chest, making her shine. I found my way between the tender folds and stroked her from top to bottom, tasting it all, then settled my mouth on the swollen bud at the top, so desperate to be sucked that her knees shook and she gasped as I latched on to her. I felt her orgasm take hold immediately, as her hips shook and she bucked into my mouth. Her fine, strong body arched into the air as that husky voice cried out, and I felt the tiny opening below squeezing tight as she rhythmically rode my face, cumming so hard that she screamed when it finally peaked. The ebbing was slow, the small shakes and pulses of it running through her entire body as she came back down from the orgasm; I wasn’t ready for her to be done, though, and carefully folded one of her legs as I rolled her hips and turned her onto her belly. “Jacob?” She raised her head and looked at me over her shoulder, her gaze bleary; I answered by opening her legs wide and nipping the sweet swell of her ass, then moving back down so I could taste the skin on the underside of her knees. Just like I’d wanted to, the first time I saw those legs. Kayla threw her head back, the river of feeling still wandering through her nervous system from the orgasm she’d just had. I wanted to keep it right there, right in that sweet spot, before making it crash over her again in another tidal take-over. I worked my way over her flesh, kissing every inch of that gorgeous body, those shoulders, her spine, the divots of her pubic bone… Finally I reached under her and raised her body in to the air by her hips, sliding her knees up so that the highest point of her body was her ass. She didn’t ask me what I was doing, this time, and I saw her brace her arms on the mattress so they could support more of her weight. Good. I lifted her ass a little higher, then went to work. My tongue ran from her engorged clit over the damp center, dripping from her orgasm, to the tiny puckered bud above it. Kayla’s asshole was the same color as her flushed nipples, a beautiful electric pink. I licked her from top to bottom and back until her spine arched and I could hear her moaning into the mattress. Carefully, I teased her clit until I could feel the tide, waiting to submerge her once more, and then, very slowly, I slipped a finger inside of her tiny center. She was so tight. I sucked her bud, feeling the tsunami hit, and when she was just about to topple over, I pushed another finger in her pussy, and my pinky, just to the first knuckle, into that unbelievably tight asshole. Kayla screamed my name as she came, bucking in to me, her body begging for more. I felt her stretching around my fingers and hoped this would be enough to let me get the head of my cock inside; she was certainly wet enough. But I wanted it to feel good. I knew I wouldn’t last long. Not the first time I was inside of her. And I worried I wanted her too much, would be too overwhelmed by her once she let me in—I wanted her ready. As ready as I could get her.
I let the wave carry her for a while, then gently extracted my fingers and flipped her over again, her legs flopping listlessly to the side and her eyes rolling in her head. “Kayla, baby, do you want—” She reached down and grabbed me, finding me with that gaze. I moved away from her just long enough to pull my pants off.
Then I was between her knees again, and although her legs were still weak, the strength in her face was unmistakable. She ran her fingers over her torso, finding her breasts and her nipples, her whole body flushed and shiny from cumming so hard. I could see the glisten of moisture in her pussy lips, so wet, so ready, and came close enough to rub the head of my cock along the fault line of her body. I’d seen her eyes widen at the size; she wasn’t the first to worry. But I’d go as slow as I could, and hopefully she was stretched enough not to hurt too badly. Very, very slowly, very carefully, I pressed the tip between her pussy lips; she bit her lip, a gesture that might’ve made me pause under any other circumstances, but she nodded to me once, her eyes locked on mine. I pushed further. Her tiny entrance was so wet I slipped inside, in the tightest pussy I’d ever felt, in the hottest, tightest little tunnel… “Jesus, Kayla, you’re going to make me cum fast, baby,” I warned her, and hoped that was okay. She was still biting that lip, her eyes wide. I pushed further, feeling something in the way… One thrust, and I was through. I was inside her. And my god, I never wanted to leave.
~~~
Kayla
It felt good.
It hurt. It opened me up, made me different, split me, then sewed me back together differently, because someone else was part of the seam.
It was amazing. It was pain. It was everything I needed, everything I never could’ve asked for, everything I didn’t know I had to have to live.
It was sex.
With someone I knew, absolutely knew, I could love. Would love.
Jacob was so far inside of me our hipbones ground together. He was suspended over me, his eyes watching mine; my legs were still open on the bed, because I was still so weak it was hard to move them. And I was pinned by his body, filled by it, changed forever by it.
“Jacob,” I whispered, looking up at him, and then I wrapped my arms around his neck and summoned my strength and did the same with my legs, feeling them lock his hips against me. “Oh, Jacob,” I whispered, hearing the reverence in my voice. His lips found mine, and we kissed as he used the new angle to get further inside of me. I gasped into his mouth. He slowly, gently pulled back, then sank in again; he did it again, and again, and the third time, I felt my body arch into the thrust, felt my swollen center beg to cum again for him, felt my clit spark as his body weight crushed into it over and over. I was going to cum for him again, already, now, now. I let the feeling overtake me, let it fill me with light, as Jacob’s breath came shorter and he tried to control himself, to keep himself from hurting me. He couldn’t know he wasn’t—he couldn’t know this was the best I’d ever felt. I moaned as I was consumed by the aching sweetness once more, the sparkling lift of the orgasm as it filled me just as he did, as he went faster, as his breathing changed again, as finally, finally, I felt him join me deep inside of my body, heat and wet colliding somewhere no one else had ever been, not even me. And then… It was over.
And it was just beginning.
I believed Jacob was brought into my life for a reason; I’m old-fashioned in some ways. I believed he was meant to save me. And not just from the recent troubles I’d had, from the pain of that experience and the horror of it’s potential; Jacob was meant to rescue me from the loneliness, from the sadness in my life. Jacob was meant to be with me. I was made for him, and that was all there was to it.
“I love you,” I whispered in his ear, not caring at all that this wasn’t the right moment, that losing your virginity to someone usually didn’t mean that much in the scheme of things… It meant everything to me. It meant I had one person, one, in this life, that I could always rely on. I just felt it, and knew it was true, and believed in it.
Instead of freaking out, Jacob kissed my cheek, then reared back so he could kiss my lips. We stayed like that for a long time, just kissing, feeling our skin on skin, feeling him slip out of me, then grow hard again. Damp, sticky, wonderful, terrifying, perfect… And after a long while, Jacob looked me in the eye.
“You don’t have to say that,” he whispered. “It’s not required.”
“Yeah it is,” I whispered back. “Now you say it. That’s the requirement.”
He looked into my eyes. “I don’t want you to feel like… You’re eighteen, Kayla, I want to—”
“I know what you want,” I told him, reaching up to run my fingers over his cheeks, then sliding my nails across his shoulders so I could mark his back. I was glad he was so strong, because he’d basically been supporting his own considerable weight on his elbows for at least an hour… Maybe two. “You want what’s best for me. You want me to feel free to do what I need to, to be who I need to be. You want me to be happy.” I looked up at him. “Thank you, Jacob. That’s what makes me love you. That’s why I want to be with you.”
He stared down at me for a long, long time. And then he said, “I love you too.”
“Hey, don’t I give the orders around here?” I shot him a look that I knew drove him wild, and sure enough he slid his hands under me and yanked me down so that his cock, stiff and long and ready to go, pressed against my swollen center. “Aren’t I the one in charge?” It was false bravado; I was already gasping, my body begging to be filled. Jacob turned me over in one smooth motion and had me on my knees again immediately. Just as he sank inside he leaned forward and licked my spine, from my nape to the center of my back.
“Not right now, Miss,” he growled, I could do nothing but moan as he filled me completely, making me shiver all over as the waves rolled back in, the orgasm clouding my vision immediately as he taught me what it felt like to be taken from behind. “What would you like me to do, Miss?” He was teasing me.
“I want you to…”
“To what, Miss?” His voice was rough. He stroked me as he sank further in, fisting my hair in one hand as he squeezed my ass.
“Fuck me, Jacob.” My voice was desperate.
“I need a please, Miss.” It was getting harder for him to hold back; I felt him throb inside me.
“Please fuck me Jacob,” I gasped, barely able to form words, as he pulled out and slammed back in to me, making me bounce forward then yanking me against him. I rocked back and forth, his hands guiding me, forcing me to open, and I heard sounds coming from my body I didn’t know I could make as he began to move faster, filling me as his hips pounded into my body from behind. The barest penetration of my secret little hole with just the tip of one finger, and I almost blacked out from the sensation—the world was just colors, light, and awesome, incredible pleasure, pleasure so dense and thick that I could taste it, as if it permeated the atmosphere. I only came back to earth when Jacob’s hands dug into my hips, making me take all of his final thrusts as he came.