I unzip my jacket and wrap it around her so that I can share my warmth with her. I rub her damp legs and look her over for any signs of injury. Thankfully, I see none, but I can’t seem to believe it.
Her teeth chatter savagely, both from the cold and from the adrenaline coursing through us. It’s possibly the only thing keeping my heart beating right now. I suck in a breath and ask again, panic gripping me. “Chloe, talk to me. Are you hurt?”
She shakes her head. “No, I-I'm fine, Donovan. I-I . . . I think my life just flashed before my eyes.”
I grab her face in my hands, gazing deeply at her. All of a sudden, my stubbornness in that discussion we’d been having feels so petty and meaningless. She is the only thing that matters to me.
“Thank god,” I reply, collapsing next to her.
I pull her into my arms, holding her much too tightly, but I can’t seem to let go. Not when I came so close to losing her.
Tears spring into my eyes as I study her beautiful face. “I’ve been so foolish, Chloe. You’re all that matters to me. Our future . . . it’s the only thing I care about.” I rub a hand over my face, trying to contain my emotions. “I know I get too caught up in work sometimes, but it’s because I want to lay a good foundation of our life together, for our children . . .”
“Children?” Chloe’s eyes are filled with tears now, too. “You think about our children?”
“Of course,” I say, pressing my forehead against hers. “How could I not want to start a family with you?” I pause, then quickly add, “But I’m not pressuring you. If you don’t want to have kids—”
“Donovan, nothing would make me happier.”
“Really?”
“Yes!” She throws her arms around me and we’re kissing like it’s the only way to breathe.
When we finally come up for air, I feel like I’ve been reborn. Chloe’s eyes are sparkling, and I want to spend the rest of my life making her look at me this way. “I love you, Chloe.”
“I love you too, Donovan.”
A shiver rips through me as I think about just how close I came to losing her. “When I heard the ice cracking . . .”
“I know,” she says, soothing me as she runs her fingers through my hair. “I’m not going anywhere.”
“Do you promise?”
She nods. “Just promise me one thing.”
“Anything.”
“That we’ll focus on us more and talk about our future, because I really want one with you.”
“I promise,” I practically sob, pressing my lips to hers over and over. “A future with you is all I want. It’s just . . .”
“What?” she asks, her eyes so vibrant with life I find myself weeping again.
Chloe’s hands gently cup my cheeks as she kisses away my tears.
“I’m sorry,” I say, when I find my voice again. “I know I’ve been so focused on the wrong parts of our future. I know the money and success we leave our children isn’t the important part. It’s the love.”
Chloe nods and waits for me to continue, but choosing the right words is difficult. I don’t know how to make her understand that I love her more than I’ve loved anyone in my life and that feeling is crippling.
It’s my turn to take her face in my hands. I want her to understand me. “Sometimes it’s still hard for me to feel I deserve more . . . What I have with you now, it’s everything, Chloe. Just getting to spend the day with you . . . It feels so perfect that I feel selfish asking for more.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, of course I want to marry you and have babies with you. But I think . . . I think I’m hesitant to speak my hopes for our future out loud because my life with you is already so much better than I ever dreamed it could be. I’m afraid if I ask for too much . . . I’m afraid it’ll all get taken away from me again.”
Chloe presses a kiss to my forehead, wrapping her arms tightly around me. “Donovan, what you went through . . . losing Vivian like that . . . I can’t even begin to imagine what that’s like. But I’m not her and if you keep living in the past we’re never going to have a future.”
“I know.” I rasp out the words, beyond disgusted with myself. “You’re right. I’ll do better, Chloe. You deserve better.”
“It’s not just you, Donovan. I need to do better, too.”
I cock my head in confusion.
“I’ll be better at telling you what I’m thinking so we don’t get to this point ever again.”
I take her hands in mine. “Chloe, that’s what I want. I want to know every thought in that beautiful head of yours. And I promise you, if you confide in me, you’ll want for nothing. Please,” I beg. “Just give me another chance.”
She grins. “I already told you, Donovan. I’m not going anywhere. I love you too damn much.”
I gasp with relief and pull her into my arms. “I love you, Chloe. And I’m so sorry I made you doubt that for even a moment.”
“And I’m sorry I didn’t tell you how I was feeling sooner. I think we both could’ve avoided a lot of heartache.”
I nod in agreement, but it’s already water under the bridge. Chloe is here, in my arms, still breathing. And somehow, she still loves me. Maybe even more than ever based on the joy sparkling in her beautiful eyes.
“Can we promise to talk about these kinds of things together?” she asks, smiling brightly. “I don’t always know what’s going on in that beautiful head of yours and sometimes that can be scary.”
“From now on I’m your open book, Chloe.”
She giggles “Really?”
“Ask me anything. Do you want to know the names I have picked out for our four kids? Or how about the two dogs we’re going to have? Or the name I want to go by when I get to be a grandpa?”
Chloe has tears in her eyes again, but I know these are from joy. I continue to rattle off all the things I dream of for our future until she’s breathless with laughter. Cradled in my arms she grins up at me. “Donovan, that all sounds wonderful, but I was hoping we’d start with a wedding first.”
“Your wish is my command,” I tease.
I kiss her until my heart feels like it might explode. She’s so much more than I deserve. As I gaze down at her I have an overwhelming urge to make her understand just how much she means to me.
“Chloe, I'm so sorry for making you feel taken for granted. I'm sorry for assuming you could read my mind. And I’m heartbroken for any moment of doubt I ever caused you. You are my everything, my reason for living. Everything I do, I do with you in the forefront of my mind. I’m going to be better at showing you that from now on.”
“Me too,” she says, sweetly.
“If you’ll marry me right now, I’d do it,” I say in all seriousness. “I’ll do anything to show you that I adore you, and treasure you, and love you more than any career opportunity. You are far more important to me than anything.”
A sigh slips from her beautiful lips. She shakes her head and then gives a faint laugh that’s music to my ears. “Thank you, Donovan. You’re the love of my life, too.”
Again, we lose ourselves in each other’s lips. When Chloe breaks away from me, she has a sly grin on her face.
“What?” I ask.
“So you’d marry me today?”
“Absolutely.”
She laughs. “I love that you’re being sincere, but don’t think you’re not getting off that easy! I’ve been dreaming about a big wedding since I was a little girl! We’re doing it right!”
I can’t help but laugh right along with her. “Then we’ll have your dream wedding. It’ll be my dream wedding as long as you’re with me.”
“Damn straight!” Her eyes soften as she cups my face, leaning up to press a kiss to my lips. “You know what’s going to be the best part of our wedding?”
“What’s that?”
“The honeymoon.” Her mischievous grin grows. “I was thinking maybe you and I could go get some practice in right now?”
“Sounds like
the perfect Christmas Eve to me,” I say through a wide grin.
Standing, I help her to her feet and hold her against my chest. This newly strengthened connection between us has me walking on air. There’s no way I'm ever letting go of her now.
“I love you, Chloe,” I say softly, making sure she can hear me. “I love our life together. You’re the most important thing in the world to me, and I never intend on letting you forget it. That’s my Christmas promise to you.”
Stacy Davis
Brilliant, twinkling stars sparkle over our heads as the sleigh gently jostles us back and forth.
Jake and I cuddle together, blankets on our laps and hot cocoas in our hands. I inhale the sweet, cinnamon fragrance of Co-Co’s special concoction, smiling to myself over how serene and lovely this little sleigh-ride getaway has been with my hunky husband-to-be.
Margot texted to let me know Ryan and Ava fell asleep watching Christmas movies back at the lodge. It warms my heart to think of the two adorable kids sleeping soundly, dreaming of all the fun we’ll have together Christmas morning.
It was so sweet of Margot and Owen to offer to watch Ryan so Jake and I could get a little time to ourselves.
“This whole vacation has been absolutely wonderful,” I murmur aloud, snuggling closer to Jake’s chest. His warmth washes over me, as does the familiar fragrance of his cologne. “This is the perfect night for me and you to spend together. It reminds me so much of my childhood. I almost feel like I’m sharing a little part of my past with you.”
“We could make this a tradition, you know?” he whispers against my hair.
“Tradition?” I repeat—Margot’s words from earlier echoing in my head.
It warms my heart to hear Jake bringing up starting our own traditions, unprompted. It makes me realize that we truly are on the same page when it comes to our family.
He nods, absently stroking my arm as he plays with my hair. “We can come back to Pine Island every Christmas. It’ll be something for us to look forward to, just like we did when we were kids. Plus, look at Ryan. He’s having the time of his life at the lodge!”
“You won’t have to twist my arm,” I tease. “I love it here, too.”
Jake snuggles me closer. “I love the memories I have of my holidays with Jenny, and I want to give Ryan and our future children the same kind of childhood.”
“Ah, yes. You mean our future football team of children?” I tease.
He laughs before kissing the tip of my nose. “We don’t have to have a whole football team. Maybe just half.”
I shoot him a warning look and he grins playfully.
I close my eyes and try to just enjoy the perfectness of this moment. I don’t want to think about my fears and everything that will be changing soon.
Instead, I listen to the sound of the horses’ feet plotting through the snow, enjoying the warmth of Jake and the cozy blanket and the perfect scent of hot cocoa mixed with Jake’s cologne. A few moments of comfortable silence pass before he pulls me a little closer. When I gaze up at him, his face is slightly serious.
“I feel like we’ve gotten so much closer over the last few days,” he begins, slowly taking his time to choose word after word. “It’s not that I felt like there was some big distance between us or anything . . . but I feel like we’ve really bonded since arriving here.”
My heart warms in my chest as I gaze up into his vulnerable face. For such a huge, burly football player, my Hartbreak Kid really has a tender heart. That makes me feel safe enough to open up to him about my thoughts and fears lately.
“I know what you mean.”
“You do?”
I nod, staring into his trusting eyes. “I know it’s silly . . . but I’ve been kind of freaked out ever since I found out I’m pregnant.”
His brow knots. “In what way?”
“It’s just,” I pause to take a breath and center myself. “We got engaged so quickly, and adopted Ryan, and then we got pregnant . . . It’s just sometimes I worry that everything’s changing so fast. What if we’re not ready to handle it? What if it changes things between us, or between our friends? And honestly, motherhood freaks me out. What if I’m no good at it?”
“First of all, that’s impossible. You’re already an incredible mother-figure to Ryan.”
I nod but find myself chewing my lip. Jake’s comment is sweet, but it’s not enough to assuage my fears. Raising Ryan isn’t the same as raising an infant.
“It’s a lot, I know,” Jake says. His calloused but gentle hand brushes my hair back from my face and cups my cheek. “Life is full of unexpected changes, Stacy. But the one thing you’ll never have to worry about is the way I feel about you. I will always love you, and so will our friends. And so will Ryan and our baby. Whether we’re on a perfect Christmas getaway, or in the middle of changing a football team’s worth of dirty diapers, you’re still the most incredible, precious person I know, Stacy. The only things that will change will be for the better.”
“Then why do I feel so scared?” I whisper, hating myself for being afraid when I have a man as wonderful as Jake by my side.
“Sweetheart, you know I’ll always protect you. I meant what I said. If being in the spotlight is too much for you now that we’re starting a family, we can move out of the city. Hell, I’ll even quit football if that’s what it takes to make you feel safe.”
“Jake, no! That’s the last thing I want.”
“Okay,” he says, softly. “Then tell me what you do want, Stacy. I’ll make it happen.”
“I don’t want to move away from the city, away from our friends. And I don’t want you to quit football. I love our life, that’s what I’m trying to tell you. I don’t want everything to change. I want to find a way to be parents to this little one, but still be us.”
Jake places a hand on my belly, looking at me so earnestly it brings tears to my eyes. “Then that’s what we’ll do.”
“But that means you have to loosen up a little.”
“What do you mean?”
My lips tug up on one side. “I mean, you have to loosen up about the paparazzi. They’re going to find out we’re pregnant eventually and I don’t want to worry you’re going to Hulk out on them if someone publishes something unflattering.”
It’s Jake's turn to smirk. “Hulk out?”
I raise my eyebrows and he laughs. “Okay, okay . . . you have a point.”
“I love how protective you are of our family, Jake, but we can’t control everything. Especially with this new baby. I don’t want you to expect things to be perfect.”
“I don’t expect things to be perfect.”
“So you’re not going to freak out if we have to stop and change a diaper in the middle of Central Park and someone snaps our photo?”
I watch the muscles in his jaw tense before he releases a deep breath. “Alright, fair point. I need to loosen the reins when it comes to the media. But I can do that. I’ll do anything for you. For you both,” he says, placing his hand over mine where it rests on my belly. “Just keep talking to me, sweetheart, and I know everything’s going to be just fine.”
“I can do that,” I promise. Already, I feel the tension leaving my body.
Jake grins, his large hand still covering mine. “It’s so amazing, isn’t it?”
“What is?”
“Until I met you, I didn’t think I could ever love someone this much. And now, thanks to this little one, I can already feel my heart growing more than I ever thought possible.”
Tears spring to my eyes again. “Me too,” I whisper before letting my lips collide with his.
How could I ever feel an ounce of fear with this man by my side?
His words are the reminder I need that we have everything necessary to be good to each other and to this new little family we’re creating—we have love.
Jake Eckhart
As I look down at my fiancée, I'm stunned by just how beautiful she is. I always find her gorgeous, but here, under the stars
with snowflakes on her long lashes and a warm smile on her face . . . she’s just utterly mind-blowing.
Delighted tears well in her eyes as our gazes collide. Holding her close, I kiss each and every single one of them away. Even if they’re tears of joy, I'm not about to let them spill. Not on this special Christmas Eve that we’re spending together.
Everything about this trip had been fabulous; from the snowmobile races, to that delicious dinner, to decorating a Christmas tree with Ryan and all of our friends, to this deep conversation that Stacy and I are having about our lives and futures and fears. Life just doesn’t get any better than this.
Stacy sighs. “I can’t believe I was so afraid to open up to you about all of those things.” She shakes her head. “I just felt like my worries were so silly and unfounded.”
“Nothing that concerns you is ever silly, Stacy. I might be on New York’s NFL team, but I'm on your team for life. It’s you and me against the world, sweetheart. We’re in this together. I never want you to feel alone. You can always talk to me about what’s going through that pretty head of yours.”
She burrows a little closer under the blankets, her fingertips dancing up my chest, feeling the dips and curves of my muscles. Her touch makes a shiver roll up my spine, as it always does.
Stacy . . . my beautiful, sweet, stubborn Stacy. She gets me going in a way no other woman ever has. That’s why I'm no longer the Hartbreak Kid. I'm just hers—forever.
“You know, for such a big, tough guy, you have a pretty soft heart,” she murmurs with a grin.
A raspy chuckle escapes my throat. I lean closer, brushing the tip of my nose against hers. “Don’t tell anyone. It’s my deepest guarded secret.”
Her chin tips up as her lips press against mine. She sighs, the hand on my chest gently gripping my shirt to pull me closer. I'm all too willing to get as close as I can to my beautiful future wife.
Only when she’s panting for breath does Stacy break from the kiss. I can still taste her hot cocoa on my lips.
Christmas in Pine Island: A small town holiday romance Page 15