by Staci Hart
“You’re fucking sick, man.”
“Sure, right,” he said with a laugh. “Tell yourself that all you want. You act like you’re so much better than me, but you’re not.” A smile as friendly as a knife slash split his lips. “Although I’ve got one card left to play.”
Cold awareness shot up my spine. “Don’t.”
“I wonder what Val would think of our little wager. Think she’ll be hurt when she hears the whole thing was a joke? That you wouldn’t have asked out a fat girl if you hadn’t been—”
My hands shot out, connecting with his shoulders, sending him reeling. His glass hit the ground with a crash and splash of whiskey and ice. A couple of people next to us squealed and jumped out of the way, watching us from a distance.
I took a step, arched over him, closed my fist in his shirt, and pulled. “If you ever call her fat again, I’ll fucking rip your face off and spit down your throat. And I swear to God, Ian. Don’t you say a fucking word to her about the bet. Not. One. Word. Or I will ruin you. Do you hear me? Ruin.”
Ian laughed. That motherfucker kicked his head back and laughed that cold, soulless laugh I hated so deeply. “Oh, Sammy boy. I’m not fucking scared of you. You always were kind of a pussy.”
My hands tightened, one on his shirt, the other coiled to fly.
But in the second of my hesitation, his wicked eyes darted behind me. “Oh, hey, Val. Lookin’ good tonight.”
Her hand in the crook of my elbow was the only thing that stopped me. “Sam? Is everything okay?”
I let him go, smoothed his shirt, patted the spot on his chest too hard. “Everything’s fine. Ian here was just leaving. Weren’t you, Ian?”
“Who, me? Oh, no. I have the whole night ahead of me. Pussy to slay, secrets to tell.” Evil. Pure evil in his eyes, behind his smile. “I’ll see you later, Val.”
I watched him walk toward the bar for a long moment.
Val twined her arm around mine. “What was that about?”
I looked down at her and smiled, feeling the thin veneer of the expression on my face. I was a fool. A guilty, sorrowful, unworthy fool. Everything I wanted was at risk, waiting under the hammer’s shadow for impact.
I’d have to tell her—and soon. But not tonight. Not on her birthday. Tonight, I’d keep her away from Ian. I wouldn’t let her out of my sight. And tomorrow, I’d tell her the truth about everything.
Tomorrow, I’d find a way.
“Don’t worry about it, babe,” I said with my heart in a vise. “Gimme a kiss and let me take you for a turn, and we’ll forget that asshole even exists.”
She smiled and kissed me.
And for a moment, it worked.
Val
Sam never stopped twirling me, and I never wanted him to. Death by spinning, aside from sounding like a punishment in Willy Wonka, wouldn’t be a bad way to go. Especially not by Sam’s hand.
I didn’t miss his avoidance of Ian, nor did I miss Ian’s constant appraisal of us. He stood on the fringes of the crowd, watching. Waiting for something. For what, I had no idea.
Honestly, I was too happy to care. My curiosity as to why Sam had been ready to pound Ian’s face to a pulp had been watered down by the magic of the night.
All my friends were at the club—Amelia and Katherine, Rin and Court. Even Dante had come, and he’d been dancing with the same girl all night. I’d even say he looked happy, which was a feat of its own.
And all the while, Sam was by my side. When I went to the bar, he was ordering my drinks and carrying them back for my friends. Wherever I went, there he was. Always touching me somewhere—my hand, my shoulder, my back, my face, my hair—as if his hands were thirsty for me.
It wasn’t until the night was over that he pulled me in for a searing kiss, dipping me to the whoops and whistles of the people around us.
When we straightened up, he smiled that smile that told me he was up to something and kissed my nose. “I’ll be right back. Stay right here.”
I laughed and leaned into him. “I won’t move a muscle.”
“Good.” With one more kiss for the road, he turned and headed toward the stage.
When I looked to my friends, they were all tied up in conversation. So I turned to the dance floor and contented myself to watch.
“Heya, Val.”
For a reason unknown, Ian’s voice startled me. I tried to smile, unsure what my role was. I had no idea what had happened between him and Sam, but I didn’t want to be rude either.
So, I gave him a halfass smile and said, “Hey.”
“Kudos for reeling in the uncatchable fish.”
I hesitated for a beat, not knowing what to say. I finally settled on, “Thanks.”
“I mean, who knew our little bet would go so far?”
My heart stuttered, lungs frozen. “I’m sorry?” I whispered, turning to look at him.
He smiled amenably. “The bet. When Sam said he could date you for a month, I didn’t believe he could do it. He sure showed me.” His laugh was anything but happy.
A tingling crawled up my spine. I couldn’t speak. There were no words, not in my head or mouth or the world.
His face softened in mock pity. “Oh my God. You didn’t know. You really thought…” A laugh, a cold, cruel sound that matched the wind in my hollow chest. “You actually thought he liked you.” His smile fell. “Sam is a player, Val. Always has been, always will be. There’s a reason he’s never had a girlfriend, and opportunity isn’t it. He doesn’t want one. You were nothing but a bet to him, a means to beat me in a game. I’m sorry he hurt you. But don’t take it too hard, kid. It’s just his way.”
There was no air. I pressed my hand to my stomach and dragged in one shallow breath at a time as tears pricked my eyes.
“What was the prize?” I croaked.
“What’s that?” he asked, leaning in.
“What was the prize?” I repeated louder, clearer.
He smiled his monstrous smile and answered, “Sleeping with you. What else?”
The music stopped, and the guitarist of the band onstage stepped to the mic as my world was reduced to the thumping of my pulse and the bomb that had gone off in my chest.
“Hey there, Sway—we’ve got a special birthday in the house. You guys might have seen Val around. She’s played up here and shaken her bobby socks out there with you all, and tonight is her night. Happy birthday, Val! We’re so happy you’re ours. Come on, everybody, let’s sing to her!”
The crowd in front of me parted, and in there was Sam, smiling and beautiful, a sheet cake in his hands and his face illuminated by candlelight. And three hundred people began to sing me “Happy Birthday” in what should have been one of the most epic moments of my life.
He stopped when he reached me and the song ended. And for a brief moment, there was nothing but silence.
“Make a wish, Val,” he said, his voice velvety and deep and right.
I blinked back my tears and drew in a breath. Saw recognition cross his face and felt my heart break. And with my wish on my tongue, I blew out my candles, every one.
Sam
The candles went out, the crowd around us cheered, and my world came to a grinding halt.
The look on her face told me everything, named every sin.
“Val, let me explain—”
“I think I got the gist of it.” The words were singed and smoking in trembling tendrils.
The crowd around us went on talking, the music starting up again, and we stood on an island in the midst of it all.
“It…it’s not what you think—” I started.
“So you didn’t have a bet with Ian about me?”
I opened my mouth to argue but closed it again.
She took a deep breath, her eyes gleaming with tears. “At least you didn’t lie to me about it.” Her eyes dropped when her feet moved, and before I could stop her, she was brushing past me. “Goodbye, Sam. Please don’t ever fucking speak to me again.”
I watched her
helplessly for a moment with her birthday cake in my hands before shoving it at some faceless guy standing nearby.
“Wait,” I called after her, reaching her easily. When I touched her arm, she jerked away from me. “Please, I didn’t want to hurt you.”
“Then you shouldn’t have taken out a fucking bet on me,” she shot, turning to me with hurt etched into every line of her face, shining in the tears collecting in her lashes. “I thought…I thought this was…” She shook her head, her chin flexing. “It was all a game to you. You never wanted me. I should have known.”
Guilt. Horror. Complete abhorrence ripped through me like thunder. “That’s not true. Val, you have to believe me—the way I feel about you is not a joke or a game.”
“Believe you? How can I trust you when everything that’s happened is a lie? I was a fool for ever thinking we could be more. I was a fool for ever wishing for more.” She backed away, her arms around her waist. “Well, you’ve won your bet. I hope it was worth it.”
“Please,” I begged, my throat closing up. I reached for her, and she let me pull her into my arms. “Please, Val. I only wanted to protect you. I didn’t want to hurt you, and now…now, I—”
“It’s too late,” she said softly, her cheeks wet with tears. “Let me go, Sam.”
Never, my heart called.
But my arms did as she’d asked.
I swallowed the stone in my throat.
“I’m sorry.” The words were low, heavy with a thousand regrets.
She met my eyes with infinite sadness and said, “Me too.”
And then I watched her walk away.
“Shame, isn’t it?”
His voice flipped a switch in me, a murderous switch with a razor’s edge. I turned. I took a breath that gained me an inch of height. And with a roar, I cocked my fist and let it fly.
The crunch of his nose and the searing crack of my knuckles did nothing to satisfy me.
Ian wheeled back, clutching at his ruined nose, the word, “Fuck!” muffled by his hands. Crimson streams ran down his lips and chin, and when his hand moved to his side to reveal a snarl, his teeth were ringed with blood.
“Fuck you, Jackson. How could you do this to me? To her?”
“Cry me a fucking river, you high and mighty son of a bitch. You thought you had it all figured out? Well, go ahead and fix this, asshole. Shouldn’t have taken the bet if you weren’t prepared to lose.”
“I didn’t have a choice!” I raged, reaching for his shirtfront again. “It was either take the bet or subject her to you, and I’d spare her that any fucking day, at any fucking cost. I can’t believe I thought you’d let me win. That’s not how you roll, is it, Ian?” I shook him. “Is it? I should have told her from the start. I should have blown this whole thing up in your face. I should have known you’d fucking double cross me the second you could.”
“The second I could?” He laughed. “You don’t even know how long I’ve waited. This is so much fucking better. I knew it would be, if I waited long enough. How’s it feel, Sammy boy? How’s it feel to be the villain? How’s it feel to be the bastard everyone hates? How’s it f—”
This time, my fist connected with his eye in a shock that shot up to my elbow in a blinding burst of pain.
When I let him go, he dropped to the ground in a heap. A laughing, manic heap.
“Poor fucking Prince Charming.”
“Fuck you, Ian.” My aching fingers clenched. My pulse charged. My vision dimmed. My heart was already broken. “I want you to remember when your life falls apart that you fucking asked for this. You asked for this.”
“Hey, Haddad?”
I turned to Dante’s voice without enough time to duck his fist. He caught me in the jaw with a hook that sent me spinning. My vision darkened, flashing with my pulse against the pain.
“Jesus fucking Christ,” I choked, hand on my aching jaw. When I stood, my fists rose halfheartedly. “I don’t want to fight you, Dante.”
“I don’t want to fight you either, you stupid son of a bitch, but I made you a promise, and I keep my word. I knew you weren’t for real. I fucking knew it.” He stepped into me, his face hard as steel. “Don’t you ever fucking come near my sister again. I’d hate to permanently fuck up that pretty face of yours, but I will.”
“You don’t understand,” I croaked.
He folded his arms. “Enlighten me.”
“I can’t lose her. This whole thing was Ian…I was trying to save her, but I didn’t…I didn’t know. I didn’t know she was everything I wanted. I didn’t know I’d fall in love with her.” The words were past my lips before I could reel them back in, the admission hitting me deep in the empty cavern of my chest.
Shock passed over his face, but it was gone as quickly as it had appeared. “Well then, you’re in deeper shit than I realized. I mean it, Haddad. Leave her the fuck alone. Don’t come around. Don’t call. Don’t push her, or you will answer to me. Do you hear me?”
I ran a hand over my face with an ancient weight tethered to my heart. “I hear you,” I rasped.
“Prove it.”
I nodded once.
With every eye on me and the silence of the club pressing me into the dirt, I did the only thing I could.
I walked away, dragging my busted heart behind me.
29
Pizza Cake
Val
A gentle knock rapped on my bedroom door. I didn’t bother wiping the tears from my cheeks.
“Come in,” I said, not really caring if the person on the other side heard or not.
The door cracked, then opened. “Hey.” It was Amelia, bearing a tray of food and a smile.
Katherine followed her with another tray, and Rin was behind her with a third.
I didn’t move to sit. I didn’t speak either.
I hadn’t moved from this spot since the moment I fell into it last night. There had been no sleep. Only a drifting in and out of consciousness between long stretches of tears.
Everything hurt. My raw nose. My thumping skull. My aching body. My shredded heart.
“We ordered your favorite meals from your favorite restaurants to cheer you up.”
“There’s no cake, is there? Because I never want to see another slice of cake as long as I live.”
“No cake,” Katherine assured me. “Drunken noodles, veggie pizza, tacos, lasagna, and gelato, but no cake.”
I peeled myself off my mattress and propped myself upright. They set the trays on various flat surfaces around my room.
“Where do you want to start?” Katherine asked.
I extended a hand. “Drunken noodles. I am not afraid to cry into noodles.”
Rin handed me the paper carton, and I sighed, grasping the chopsticks stuck in the mass of noodles.
“Did you get any sleep?” Rin asked.
“Not really.” I poked around in the carton, wondering if I was even hungry. My empty stomach lurched in answer. So I shoveled a rude bite into my mouth, hoping I could at least make my belly happy.
“I just can’t believe this.” Amelia’s eyes were impossibly big and sad and crystalline blue.
Katherine wore a slight frown. “I never thought Sam would participate in something so asinine.”
I tried to sigh, but my breath hiccuped as I drew it in. “I both don’t believe it and am not at all surprised. I always knew it was too good to be true. I just had no idea how horrible the truth was. I was just a joke. He never had feelings for me. He never wanted to hang out with me. He never wanted to even talk to me, and if it hadn’t been for the bet, he wouldn’t have. Everything we had was triggered by that lie.”
Rin nodded in thought. “But does that make his feelings any less real now? Does it matter how it got started?”
“It was started by a cruel wager—an unwanted girl and the man everyone desires. The man who never dates dating the girl he’d never choose. I hope his feelings aren’t real. I hope it was all a lie, every word. At least that way it’d be easier to be
ar.”
Katherine gave me a look. “You don’t honestly believe that, do you?”
I fished around in my noodles like the answers were buried somewhere in the tangle. “I don’t know what I believe anymore. I don’t know how to feel or what to think. I don’t know how I’m supposed to g-go to work tonight and see his face. Ian’s face, too. G-God, I am s-so stupid.” My tears fell freely. “I can’t believe I fell for all of it. I can’t believe I played along. Do you think that was always his plan? The tutoring and fake dates and e-everything—that it was all just a way to reel me in?”
“If it was, he’s a sociopath,” Katherine said. “Sam doesn’t strike me as a liar. And seeing you two together? I don’t think he could have faked that. I saw him look at you when he thought no one was watching. A man doesn’t look at a woman like that if he’s playing her.”
Rin nodded again. “He said he was trying to protect you. From Ian, right? That sounds more like the Sam we know. Maybe…maybe there’s some explanation.”
“I’m sure there is,” I agreed sadly. “I just don’t know if I want to hear it.”
“Why not?” Amelia asked.
“Because there’s nothing he can say that will change what he did and how it made me feel to learn the truth.”
Their faces softened, saddened.
“There’s nothing that can erase my humility and shame, knowing he never wanted me in the first place. There’s nothing that could undo the pain of giving my trust to a man who betrayed it in such a merciless way. Did he even think about how I would feel? Did he even consider me at all, or was he only thinking of himself?” I shook my head. “It doesn’t matter. I don’t even want to know.” I stuck my chopsticks into the carton and set it on my nightstand.
The doorbell rang.
We all exchanged glances before bolting out of my room and to Rin’s where we could see the stoop from her window. Amelia reached it first and clapped her hand over her mouth in a gasp. One by one, they reached the window, and I was last, having had to find my way out of my sheets first. And I knew before I reached it what I’d find.