“Contact her, Miles.”
“Is that fair, Lil?”
“If I were you, I wouldn’t give a rat’s if it was fair. If you care about her and want her in your life, fight for her, Miles.”
I rested my elbows on the table and looked into my sister’s eyes. “What do I have to offer Pia? What kind of life?” I spoke barely above a whisper, but when Lily’s eyes filled with tears, I knew she heard me.
“Everything, Miles. All you have to do is want it.”
Rather than going straight back to the hospital when our lunch ended, I walked around London, eventually making my way to the hotel where Pia showed me my life wasn’t over in the way I’d believed it was.
I walked inside, over to the bar, and ordered a pint. Lily didn’t say Pia was staying here, and if she had, I couldn’t say for certain I’d be here.
I found an empty table and sat with my head in my hands. Was Lily right? Could Pia and I be together? How? I could never ask her to leave Valentini, and even if I did, what kind of life could I promise her?
Of the four Invincible partners, only Decker was in a relationship, but then his base had always been in Texas, where he and his wife lived. How many other agents did I know who were in relationships? Not many.
The ones I’d worked with at SIS, who I knew were married, had mostly retired, but wasn’t I also retired? Wasn’t part of being independent being able to accept missions as well as decline them?
My mobile vibrated, and I pulled it out of my pocket.
“I’m at the hospital, waiting for your return,” said Rile.
“I’d no idea you were in town.”
“Lynx said you left some time ago.”
“I stopped for a pint.”
“Where?”
I gave Rile the name of the hotel, which wasn’t more than a ten-minute walk away. “We could meet elsewhere. There’s obviously something urgent—”
“I’m on my way.”
The call ended. What in the bloody hell?
I’d never quite been able to figure Rile out; the man was an enigma. When he’d brush his bottom lip with the tip of his finger, or smile in that weird way he did, there were times I could swear he was reading my mind. I shuddered at the thought, given there were plenty of instances when the only thing on my mind was what a wanker he could be.
He walked in and sat across the table from me. Within seconds, the barmaid approached to take his order. I shook my head. I hadn’t seen her walk from behind the bar a single time since I arrived, and there were plenty of tables waiting.
“I’ll have what he’s having.”
When she walked away, Rile’s gaze remained on her arse. When she was out of sight, he turned to me and smiled.
“How are you, Grinder?”
“As well as can be expected.”
“Edge will regain full use of his arm.”
“Yeah? Can you see into the future, Rile?”
“At times,” he answered without missing a beat.
“What about me? What will I be doing say…a year from now?”
He raised a brow, rested his arms on the table, and leaned forward. “I don’t think you’re ready for me to tell you, but soon, you might be.”
“You’re a bit up yourself, mate.”
He shrugged as though that wasn’t news.
“Why are you really here, Rile?”
“What’s on your mind?”
“You’re answering my question with a question.”
He nodded. “It’s evident there’s something you want to discuss with me.”
I shook my head and laughed.
“I’m here, Grinder. Speak.”
I stared into my beer and then looked up at him. “Okay. What if one of us wants to be in a relationship? A long-term one?”
“One of us is—Decker is married.”
“You know what I mean. Edge, you, me?”
“Why did you join the Royal Army?”
“To protect and serve,” I answered without hesitation.
“Perhaps if you never saw yourself married, you might have considered the priesthood, then?”
“Where are you going with this?”
He sat back in his chair when the barmaid returned with his pint, and then once again watched her as she walked away.
“You, of all people, should be aware of how precious life is. You didn’t ask, but the reason I joined SIS was because I believe every man and woman should be able to live their life free of tyranny, free of persecution, free of fear.”
I nodded, feeling a little embarrassed that, like he said, I hadn’t asked.
“What do you want out of life, Grinder? Work alone? Is that the only way you see yourself? You come from a nice family, no?”
“A very nice family.”
“Why wouldn’t that be something you’d want?”
I turned my head when someone familiar caught my eye. Walking in the hotel’s entrance was the only woman with whom I’d ever imagined building a life. As my sister had warned, she wasn’t alone. The man she was with, Paolo, had his arm around her shoulders. He said something, she laughed, he pulled her close, and kissed her cheek.
Seeing her happy should’ve made me happy as well. It didn’t. Instead, it felt like the bottom had just dropped out of my life, sending me plummeting into a hole I’d never be able to crawl out of.
15
Pia
I felt him before I saw him. Mylos was here. I turned my head, just slightly, and saw him seated at a table in the bar with another man whose back was to me. He didn’t look up; I didn’t know whether he’d seen me walk in.
“Everything okay?” Paolo asked.
“Sì. I thought I saw an old friend.” I let my gaze rest on the man who’d held my heart since we were both sixteen years old. Seeing him here, now, was like an omen.
As I let Paolo lead me away, I turned my head once more and looked over my shoulder. Mylos’ head was raised and our eyes met.
“Paolo, mi scusi.” I pointed in the direction of the ladies’ room. I walked away slowly, afraid to look behind me a second time.
I let cool water pool in my palms and brought it to my face and then to the back of my neck. I took several deep breaths while I looked at my reflection in the mirror. I’d dreamed of Mylos last night, and it left me feeling unsettled. He was angry with me. He’d shouted his words at me, none of which I couldn’t remember when I woke. I’d never known him to raise his voice. He’d never spoken a word to me in real anger. He’d scolded me all those years ago when I tried to use him to make Paolo jealous. How ironic that the three of us were in the same place at the same time once again.
I leaned forward and used the tip of my finger to wipe away the mascara that had run, washed, and dried my hands. When I came out of the ladies’ room and looked over to the bar, the table where I’d seen Mylos sat empty.
“Here you are,” said Paolo, handing me a small envelope and leading me to the elevator. He pressed the button for the tenth floor, and the door closed, leaving us alone.
“You’re on ten, I’m on nine, unless you’d like to switch. The rooms are identical.”
“Thank you for honoring my request, Paolo.”
“Separate rooms?”
“Sì.”
He leaned against the elevator wall and rested the back of his hand on his forehead. “You continue to resist me, but soon, I’ll win you over. If it’s the last thing I do. Until then, I will remain your devoted servant.”
I smiled and swatted his arm. “Sciocchino.”
“We’ll meet in the lobby at seven?” he asked after walking me to my room.
“Thank you again, Paolo, for allowing me to come with you on this trip.”
“Sweet, sweet, Pia. The pleasure is all mine.”
We had a dinner meeting scheduled for eight with the Fellwood Group, the largest wine and spirit distributor in the UK. If they were to add our wine to their list, that alone would give me the sales I needed not only to keep V
alentini afloat, but to implement some of the other ideas I’d been toying with.
Throughout the meal, I found my thoughts drifting to Mylos. Why had he been in the bar of our hotel? Had Lily told him I was visiting London? I hadn’t told her where I was staying.
“Pia?” Paolo touched my arm.
“Pardon?”
“Mr. Fell asked what your current production levels are for Brunello di Montalcino and Rosso di Montalcino?”
“Ten thousand cases each, at the DOCG level, of course.”
Mr. Fell and his colleague, Mr. Wood, raised a brow.
“Additionally, fifteen thousand cases each of Brunellos and Brunello Riservas.”
“Impressive. Paolo, these numbers are higher than yours,” said Mr. Wood.
“If I may, while production may seem high for these particular wines, unlike Viticcio, we only grow Sangiovese.”
The rest of the dinner conversation was focused on more of the same, and at the end, the gentlemen from Fellwood promised we’d hear from them in the next few days with an order.
“This is fantastic,” said Paolo on the cab ride back to the hotel.
“It is.” I tried to match his enthusiasm, but until I saw what the orders were, I was hesitant to celebrate.
“What do you say we have a nightcap?” he asked as we walked into the hotel.
“Thank you, Paolo, but I am very tired. I think I’ll call it a night. Thank you again for all you’ve done for Valentini.”
“I’ll ride up with you.” He put his arm around my shoulders and squeezed. “We make a good team, Pia.” As we waited for the elevator, he lowered his lips to mine. I tried to back away, but with his arm around my neck, I couldn’t, so I turned my face. “Paolo, please.”
“I thought perhaps, since dinner went so well, you would be in the mood to…thank me.”
“In the mood to thank you? What does that mean?”
“It seems only fair.” He leaned closer, and I could smell the alcohol on his breath. He grasped my arm hard enough that I knew tomorrow I’d have bruises. “You owe me, Pia.”
“I owe you? What am I, a whore whose wine you’ve pimped to your customers?”
He tightened his grasp. “You’re making far too much of this, amore mio.”
Even if we hadn’t been the only people in the elevator, I still would’ve done the same thing. I raised my hand and slapped him.
“Was that necessary?” He rubbed his cheek.
I wrenched my arm from his grip. “I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt, Paolo, since you’ve never behaved this way with me before, and assume you are drunk.” The elevator door opened, and I stepped out, baring his exit. “Goodnight, Paolo. If you want to remain my friend, tomorrow I’ll expect an apology, after which we’ll never speak of this again.” When the doors started to close, I took a step back, not hearing whatever he said in response.
I stalked to my room, fuming at what a disaster the night had been. I was disappointed beyond belief that what should have been the end of a nice evening, had turned so unpleasant.
I’d just stepped from the shower when I heard a knock at the door. “This is ridiculous,” I muttered, donning the white terry-cloth robe the hotel provided.
I pulled the door open in anger, prepared to tear into the man who was quickly becoming my former friend. “I’m in no mood for this, Paolo—”
“Lover’s spat?” Mylos smirked and rested one arm on the door jamb. “You should know, he left the hotel only moments ago with a very tall, very beautiful blonde.”
“Thank you for delivering that information to me personally; however, what Mr. Viticcio does in his free time is of no interest to me.”
Mylos pushed past me.
“Mi scusi, I did not invite you in.”
“I thought maybe since you and Mr. Viticcio have such an open relationship, I’d keep you company in his absence.”
“This is getting old,” I muttered under my breath as I stalked over to him and raised my hand to slap his face like I had Paolo’s. Mylos, though, was too quick for me. He leaned forward, close enough to kiss me, and stared into my eyes.
I wrenched my arm away and rubbed my wrist. “Why are you here, Mylos?”
“I can’t believe you’re with him. What happened to his wife? Are you the reason they divorced? Are you a homewrecker, Pia?”
“It’s time for you to leave.” I walked over to the door and held it open for him.
“I just have one question—”
I slammed the door closed. “What?”
“I mean that little to you, Pia?”
I shook my head. “You mean that little to me? I am nothing to you. Nothing! I am the pretty Italian girl you bump into every couple of years, have a quick fuck, and then I never hear from you again.”
“That’s rich, coming from you.”
I scrunched my eyes. “What does that mean?”
“Whenever we’re together, you can’t get back to Italy fast enough.”
“It’s where I live, Mylos.” I walked over and poured a shot of whatever brown liquor was in the decanter. Holding my breath, I downed it. My throat burned and I coughed.
“Jesus,” he said, stalking over to me. He pulled the glass from my hand, reached into the bar refrigerator, and put a few ice cubes in it before pouring more of the liquor.
“No, thank you,” I said when he tried to hand it to me. He drank it himself. “Don’t you think you’ve already had enough?”
“Are you suggesting I’m drunk?”
“What else would explain you barging in here like a mad man?”
“The last drink I had was hours ago when you came waltzing in with your boyfriend and then proceeded to waltz out on your date. Don’t think I missed the kiss in the elevator either.”
“Have you been watching me?”
“Sì,” he said, mimicking me and making me itch to slap him again. Not that I did the first time, but I’d meant to. Instead, I put my hand on my heart.
Like in my dream, Mylos and I were shouting at each other. A profound sadness swept over me. I sat down on the sofa and put my head in my hands. “Please leave, Mylos. Just go away. We never have to see each other again.”
“Is it really that easy for you?”
I stared up at him. “What are you talking about?”
“To say you never want to see me again?”
“That isn’t what I said.” I put my face back in my hands, hiding my tears as I wept.
“Fuck!” he growled as he sat down beside me, pulling my hand from my face, gently this time.
I couldn’t look at him. My heart was breaking, and to look at his beautiful face, maybe for the last time, was more than I could stand.
The last thing I expected was for him to pull me into his arms, but that’s what he did. He held me close to him, murmuring to me as I cried.
“I can’t do this, Mylos.”
He put his hand on my chin and raised my face. “Do what, Pia?”
“I can’t fight with you. I can’t stand hearing you raise your voice at me. It hurts too much. The things you said to me…is that how you see me?” I stood up, weaving my fingers into my hair. “Who am I that two men in one night see me so differently than I see myself?”
He stood too and put his hands on my arms, gently lowering them. “I’m sorry. I was, I am…jealous.”
“But why? Why are you jealous of someone you don’t even care about?”
“What makes you think I don’t care?”
“If I hadn’t come to London with Paolo, when would I have seen you again?”
He let go and turned his back on me. “Would you believe that’s all I’ve been thinking about, even before I saw you walk in earlier?”
“No.”
“I didn’t think so, but it’s true. When Lily told me you were traveling with a man…I couldn’t stand it.”
“Because you were jealous?”
“Yes.”
“At least you’re being honest. B
ut, Mylos, you can’t just want me when you think someone else does.”
He turned back toward me and pulled me into his arms. “I know. I’ve handled things with you so badly. Like I said, Lily told me earlier that you were coming to town with Paolo. After she did, I took a long walk, and it led me here. I had no idea if you were staying in this hotel, and I wasn’t even sure that’s why I came. It was more that this place will always remind me it was you, Pia, who made me whole again.”
“I don’t want your gratitude, Mylos.”
“Can we sit?”
I nodded and sat down first.
Mylos took my hand in his. “It isn’t gratitude. That’s far too small a word for how I feel. What you did for me, it was everything, Pia. Everything. Do you understand?”
“And still, it wasn’t enough.”
“Why do you say that?”
I shook my head. I couldn’t spell it out for him. That was the whole point. He didn’t get it, because I didn’t matter to him in the same way he mattered to me. I loved him. I’d known it for years, pushed it away, but it always came back.
Even if this would be the last time, I wanted us to make love. Tomorrow, I would get on a plane and return to Val d’Orcia to stay. The Valentini name would end with me, and maybe then, so would the curse.
Our lovemaking was soft and sweet, as though we both knew it was goodbye. We didn’t speak, and when it was over, I rolled on my side and pretended to sleep. I was still awake over an hour later when he crept from the bed and quietly left.
16
Grinder
“Forgive me, my friend. If it was not a true emergency, I would not have bothered you,” Rile said when I met him downstairs in the lobby after receiving the SOS alert.
Thankfully, Pia was asleep when I left. I wedged a stop in the lock and hoped to be back in her bed before she woke and realized I was gone.
“What is it?”
“A possible kidnapping.”
Grinded (The Invincibles Book 3) Page 12