by Brandon Mull
“Me no Snot Lick,” the hermit troll said. “Me Jeff.”
“You no Jeff,” Hermo said. “What real name?”
“Me Fonnar.”
“Me Hermo. You get lost.”
“This my lair.”
Hermo gave a derisive chuckle. “This for many trolls.”
“Me have places here,” Fonnar said.
Hermo cocked his head and looked around. “Maybe.”
“Why bring human?” Fonnar asked.
“Human my slave,” Hermo said. “You get lost or he throw potatoes.”
Fonnar sized up Seth. “He no look slave.”
“He valet,” Hermo said smugly.
Fonnar shooed Hermo away with both hands. “Hermit troll no have valet. No have slave either. No have human.”
Hermo puffed out his chest. “You not know what best hermit troll have.”
“You no best,” Fonnar said.
“I ride in fish,” Hermo said. “I have human.” Hermo glanced around. “Where your slave?”
“Me busy,” Fonnar sputtered, wobbling off. Hermo approached a bar where a stocky gray troll with black stripes filled a mug from a spigot.
“Me want famous rabbit stew,” Hermo said. “And brick of rat tallow for human.”
“How do you intend to pay?” the bartender asked in a gravelly voice.
“Him pay,” Hermo said, jerking a thumb at Seth.
Seth absently patted his pockets and realized the Tiny Hero was no longer in there. Neither was any money.
“How much does the stew cost?” Seth asked.
The bartender leaned forward with a gleam in his eye, his smile revealing rows of teeth made for shredding. “You speak Duggish?”
“I aim to please,” Seth said.
“A slave to this little one, are you?” the bartender asked.
“I strive to serve Master well,” Seth said.
“Master, is it? Well, for you and his excellency, the price of a bowl of soup is merely ten pounds of gold and a basket of diamonds. I’ll throw in the rat tallow for any ruby larger than a hen’s egg.”
“Too much,” Hermo griped.
“Or else, three healthy human children,” the bartender bargained.
“Him no like you,” Hermo told Seth. “You go so I eat stew.”
“Did either of you notice this is Troll Tavern?” the bartender asked through gritted teeth. “We don’t take kindly to humans here, nor any who brings one.”
“He no human,” Hermo said. “He Dirt Face. He slave.”
“Where are his chains?” the bartender asked.
“He trained,” Hermo said.
The bartender chuckled, then raised his voice. “Anybody spy a human in the room?”
“I smelled something awful,” a gruff voice answered, drawing laughs.
“I saw a human,” another troll called. “Thought maybe I had too much to drink.”
“Anybody claim him?” the bartender asked.
“He my slave,” Hermo piped up.
The bartender slapped both hands on the bar and glared down at Hermo. “Are you standing by that claim in this company?”
“Not now,” Hermo muttered, stepping away.
“Anybody else care to speak for the human?” the bartender asked.
The room was quiet.
“Who wants fresh human on the menu?” the bartender asked.
Uproarious cheering greeted the proposition. All eyes were on Seth now, and Hermo was edging away, looking miserable. Seth realized he was on his own.
Searching inside himself, Seth found the cold and darkness Ronodin had taught him to seek, then reached out with his ability to the candles and torches in the room and started dousing them. Startled trolls gasped and murmured, and a moment later the room sank into near-perfect blackness. A sudden chill pierced the air.
“Spellcraft,” a voice accused.
“Witchery,” another cried.
“I’m no slave,” Seth challenged loudly.
“Shadow charmer!” a voice exclaimed.
“Last week I was doing errands for the Underking,” Seth said. “Today I’m on business of my own. Take care, you never know what unseen beings are within the call of a shadow charmer. I overthrew Wyrmroost in a day. Maybe I’ll let your tavern stand for a while if somebody can answer my questions.”
A troll with a face like a bulldog covered in snakeskin lit a torch. “He’s all right,” the troll said. “It’s the one that killed Graulas. Tornick, today he eats on my tab.”
More candles and torches were lit, and trolls started turning back to their own conversations. Seth had failed to inspire much awe, but he seemed to have dodged disaster.
“You still want rabbit stew for the little one?” the bartender asked.
“Are you Tornick?” Seth asked.
The bartender gave a little bow. “What’s your business here?”
“I’m looking for Humbuggle,” Seth said.
Tornick hawked, spat on the counter, and started wiping it with a grimy rag. “Might be less trouble to let us eat you.”
“Shadow charmers taste horrible,” Seth said.
Tornick shrugged. “I’ll take your word for it. What about the stew? You have an open tab.”
“Thanks,” Seth said. “Some stew would be great.”
“What will you have?” the bartender asked. “Still hungry for rat tallow?”
“Do you have any human food?” Seth asked.
Tornick patted the counter as if imitating a drumroll. “We have bread and cheese.”
“I’ll take it,” Seth said. Then he hesitated. “Is it possum cheese or something?”
“We have several varieties,” Tornick said. “The kind I had in mind for you is made with cow’s milk.”
“Sounds all right,” Seth said.
Hermo sidled up to Seth as Tornick moved away.
“Your stew is coming,” Seth said.
“Good slave,” Hermo said.
“No problem,” Seth said. “But I’m not your slave.” He felt something brush his ankle and glanced down to find Calvin climbing his pant leg. Seth subtly put a hand down and lifted the nipsie to his shoulder.
“You want Dante,” Calvin whispered loud enough for Seth to hear.
“Who is that?” Seth asked.
“A troll in a secret back room,” Calvin said. “He has been watching you through peepholes. The other trolls whisper his name with reverence.”
“Good job,” Seth said.
“They call me Tiny Hero for a reason,” Calvin said. “Don’t forget to ask about Serena.”
“I won’t,” Seth promised.
“Me almost got to try slave soup,” Hermo said.
“Nobody cooks me without a fight,” Seth muttered. He regarded the bustling room, dozens of trolls engaged in conspiratorial conversations, more than a few gazes straying his way. “Is this place all you dreamed?”
“It not bad,” Hermo said. “Me know more when stew comes.”
Tornick returned with half a loaf of bread and a big hunk of white cheese for Seth and a steaming bowl of chunky stew for Hermo. The hermit troll had to kneel on his stool to be tall enough for the counter.
“I need to talk to Dante,” Seth mumbled softly.
“What are you going on about?” Tornick asked, matching his quiet tone.
“Dante,” Seth repeated. “I need to see Dante.”
“Never heard of the guy,” Tornick whispered.
“Don’t play dumb,” Seth said. “Everybody knows Dante.”
“Oh, that Dante,” Tornick acknowledged. “I hear you. The briar troll. He hasn’t been seen around these parts in a good while.”
“He’s in the back room,” Seth said. “He’ll be glad he saw me.”
Tornick couldn’t hide his surprise. “You’re determined to get yourself into hot water.”
“It’s where I swim,” Seth whispered boldly. “Go tell Dante the shadow charmer wants to have words with him. Or find somebody who can.�
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Tornick shrugged. “Your funeral.”
Seth cut a slice of bread and put cheese on it. The bread was a little stale, but the cheese tasted quite good. A simple meal, but tasty, and different from what he had eaten in the leviathan. Seth chewed slowly, hoping it made him look casual about the surrounding danger.
Hermo finished his stew by tipping the bowl against his lips and licking the interior clean, then wiped his mouth on his sleeve. “Me like this place.”
Seth popped a little piece of cheese into his mouth without any bread. “It’s growing on me.”
Two trolls wearing long coats approached Seth from behind, one on each side, squeezing in close. They matched each other, tall and muscular, with silvery scales and curled horns like a ram’s. One leaned in closer than the other, staying in profile as he studied Seth through a narrow eye on the side of his head.
“Alley trolls,” Hermo mumbled, leaping one stool farther away.
“Folks who nose around here tend to have accidents,” the beefy troll said.
“I want to see Dante,” Seth said.
“He doesn’t know you,” the troll replied. “He wonders how you know him.”
“He has a reputation,” Seth said.
“Why should he talk to a stinking human?”
Seth forced himself to put some bread in his mouth. He hoped to look relaxed as he gave his answer. “I want his advice before I tear this sanctuary apart.”
He chewed as the trolls on either side of him exchanged uncertain glances. “Dante doesn’t like strangers.”
“Look, if you can’t take me to him, go find a troll who can,” Seth said.
The trolls shared another glance. “Very well,” the spokesman said. “Let’s see how long you last.”
I’m coming with you,” Knox insisted. Outside the window of the elevated room, smoke and ash plumed up from Baga Loa. “How can you pretend it is any safer here where sand monsters attack us and a volcano is erupting!”
“Savani is getting things under control,” Kendra said.
“But she can’t protect us like a Giant Queen could,” Knox said.
“I’d love to see a Giant Queen,” Tess expressed. “Does she wear fancy gowns?”
“I’m not sure,” Kendra said. “Technically the Giant Queen is part of Dragonwatch. But she does things her own way. We’re not sure how much we can rely on her.”
“But she keeps her dragons under control,” Knox said.
“It’s supposed to be the most secure sanctuary,” Kendra said.
“Then why aren’t we there already?” Knox asked. “Tess is just a kid! Don’t you want her secure?”
“I’m into double digits,” Tess said.
“I’m not new to giants,” Knox reminded Kendra. “You were there when we partied with Thronis. Besides, even if Titan Valley is super dangerous, I’ve proven I can handle emergencies. I want to help you get Seth back.”
“It isn’t your fault he was taken,” Kendra said.
“I’m the reason Ronodin had access to the barrel,” Knox said. “I left the keys to the dungeon with the goblin at Fablehaven.”
“You made a mistake,” Kendra said. “It’s good to learn from, but it was Ronodin who took him.”
“I can still help save him,” Knox argued.
“The dragon war is heating up,” Kendra said. “With more preserves falling, the dragons are gaining momentum. I have a feeling Titan Valley could become a battlefield.”
“Visiting Remulon turned into a battle,” Knox said. “If I hadn’t been along, you might still be his prisoner. You need me.”
“The more people helping, the better your chances,” Tess said. “I want to come too.”
Kendra sighed. Knox really had saved the day when they faced Remulon. And he was right that Titan Valley might prove to be a safer sanctuary than Crescent Lagoon. “Fine. If that’s what you want, you and Tess can come.”
Knox pumped a fist. “Yes.”
“You might not thank me in the end,” Kendra warned.
“Let me at least enjoy the beginning,” Knox said. “We’re going through fairyland?”
“We are?” Tess asked breathily, eyes wide.
“Yeah, the Fairy Realm,” Kendra said. “We’ll just be passing through.”
“When?” Tess asked.
“Now,” Kendra said. “I’d intended to say goodbye to you, not to bring you along. Grab what you need.”
Kendra exited the room and went to the main platform, where Warren, Vanessa, Tanu, Newel, Doren, Savani, and Andromadus awaited her. “Knox and Tess are coming,” she announced.
“That confirms it,” Newel said. “We’re coming too.”
“We’d love your help,” Kendra said.
“Nobody made life interesting like Seth,” Doren said.
“Without him we might never have learned about fast food,” Newel said.
“Or video games,” Doren said.
“Or gummy candy,” Newel added. “He must be rescued.”
“So be it,” Andromadus said. “Kendra, do you know the story of the Legender?”
“That doesn’t sound familiar,” she admitted.
“The tale explains the origin of the legendary Dragon Slayers,” Andromadus said. “These are the five Dragon Slayers who set the pattern for all others. The ones we hope to find. It might be of value for you to know it.” He pulled a large book from within the folds of his robe. “There are many versions of the story. I like this illustrated telling.”
Kendra accepted the oversized book and leafed through it. The book wasn’t thick and had fairly large type, with fanciful illustrations and illuminated letters. “I’ll read it.”
“The dragons are hunting the legendary slayers,” Andromadus said. “We need to find the slayers first.”
“Don’t leave yet,” Knox called. “Here we come!”
He and Tess ran into view from across a bridge.
“Should I leave a note for the fairies?” Tess asked.
“I will give them your kind regards,” Savani said.
“Shall I transport us to the fairy shrine?” Andromadus asked.
“Sure,” Kendra said. “It’s nice to have a wizard around.”
Andromadus looked at Savani. “You have much to accomplish here.”
Savani gave a small bow. “I bid you all a fond farewell and wish you safe travels.”
“Thanks for everything,” Kendra said.
“Keep that volcano calm,” Knox added.
“We will do what we can,” Savani said.
“Come,” Andromadus said. “The fairy shrine awaits.”
Waterfalls spilled from a semicircular embankment into a shallow marsh where large tiki statues waded. They were in different locations from where Kendra had found them on her previous visit. She knew the statues could move, though she had never caught one in the act. Kendra understood that unwanted trespassers into the fairy shrine would be destroyed, but today, she and her friends had permission.
“Freaky statues,” Knox said. “Where are the fairies?”
“Did you drink your milk?” Tess asked.
“I drink it every morning,” Knox said.
“Then you would see them if they were here,” Tess replied.
“I expect we’ll see plenty when we cross to the Fairy Realm,” Kendra said.
“This is where we part ways,” Andromadus said. “I must make assignments to some of the members of Dragonwatch, and the Polar Plains sanctuary has requested my assistance.”
“I wish you could come with us,” Tess said.
“You will be protected,” Andromadus said. “I notified the Giant Queen about your visit. A giant called Rustafet will meet you at the Titan Valley fairy shrine and provide you with safe access to the castle.”
“What kind of welcome can we expect from the Giant Queen?” Kendra asked.
“As official visitors from Dragonwatch, you can count on her hospitality,” Andromadus said. “If you want a word of advice,
she will think you perceptive and intelligent if you recognize her virtues. But don’t overdo it. She is no fool.” The wizard vanished in a burst of red light.
“So dramatic,” Warren said.
“You’d do it if you could,” Vanessa teased.
“I’d probably moonwalk first,” Warren said. “Maybe throw in a spin.”
“I can hardly believe a blix will be allowed to enter the Fairy Realm,” Vanessa said. “No matter how briefly.”
“The Fairy Queen is letting me bring whoever I want,” Kendra said. “This way.”
“We have to wade into the water?” Knox asked.
“Going through will dry us off,” Kendra told him. “Don’t grab any treasure you see along the way. It’s a trap.” She sloshed deeper into the marsh. The others followed.
“So don’t go take that golden shield over there?” Warren asked.
“That’s exactly the kind of thing to ignore,” Kendra said.
“But I want it,” Newel pouted.
“What about a scepter with a big emerald?” Knox asked.
“Resist the urge,” Kendra said.
Doren whimpered miserably.
Kendra led them to a curtain of clear water at the rear of the semicircle. The water doused her as she passed through, and the others came after, crowding into the humid alcove, ankle-deep in water. A tiny fairy statue stood near a bronze bowl in a niche opposite the waterfall.
“Ladies and gentlemen,” Knox announced, “I give you . . . the back side of water!” He gestured at the waterfall.
Newel and Doren snickered.
“Hush,” Kendra said. “This is a sacred place.”
“Is that a statue of the Fairy Queen?” Tess asked politely.
“I’m not sure,” Kendra said, squinting at it. “But I know it represents her power.”
“Where do we go now?” Knox asked.
“We ask her for help,” Kendra said, clearing her throat. “Fairy Queen, I am here to cross through your realm to Titan Valley. I brought my friends and family as we agreed. Can you help us cross over?”
The air stirred and became rich with earthy aromas. A hand reached up out of the water, which seemed impossible because it was so shallow. Tess shrieked.
“It’s all right,” Kendra said. Crouching and taking the hand, she was pulled down into the water and almost immediately found she was being pulled up out of a pool of water by the Fairy King. The seamless transition from down to up felt strangely natural despite seeming illogical.