“Really?”
Julia nodded. “Everywhere we rode today is part of the Y2. My dad built this place after he had kids as a sort of getaway. Once Vitty and I were old enough to ride up here on our own, well, let’s say that some unlucky kids only get a tree house.”
The open fireplace, old chairs, and tables added a minimum requisite charm to the basic two-room with the log walls. Rina stood and walked to the small window by the door. “I can feel your eyes on me from behind, Julia.”
“With your hair wet, standing there by the door…” Julia rose and sauntered in her direction, “it reminds me of…”
“Our first night.” Rina turned and let Julia press her up against the wall in a steamy first-kiss-redux. But this time, their lips met with a newfound hunger—in their secret getaway where rain pummeled and wind sheared, where bursts of thunder rumbled through the walls and from the floor up through Rina’s wet body. In this place, where the only character she needed to play was herself—unscripted, where paparazzi had no access to all that cured her—she had an epiphany. If I can’t be in love here, I can’t be in love anywhere!
“Come with me,” said Julia, leading Rina to the bedroom.
“Wait. Are Thunder and Lightning okay?”
“I love that you care about the horses.”
“Should we bring them inside?”
Julia laughed. “They’re not dogs, Katarina.”
“Yes, but they’re used to the barn. Maybe we should check on them.”
Julia exhaled hard. “By ‘we’ you mean me. You’re not going to let this go, are you?”
“No.”
“Fine. Let me change back into my wet clothes.”
“Be careful out there. I’ll wait at the door.”
Dressed in cold, soaked clothing with a parka tossed over her, Julia sprinted into the deluge. She sloshed back into the cabin within the long side of a minute. “They’re fine,” she said, dripping inside the door. “They’re tucked away against the wind and rain on three sides and under the roof. Happy?” She hung the parka on a hook by the door and removed her now slightly soggier boots. “I’m freezing!” Hastily tossing some logs and kindling into the fireplace, Julia struck a long match and stood as close as she could to the growing flames while she dried off and changed into her dry clothes.
Rina sat on the love seat, watching her. “I feel much better knowing Thunder and Lightning are okay.”
“How about a hot coffee?”
“That sounds perfect.”
Julia connected a small propane tank to the two-burner stove. She reached into the cabinet, found the old dented percolator, and filled it with water and coffee from a generic can labeled “Coffee.”
“You’re going to have to drink it cowgirl style. I lacked the foresight to pack cream or that Beverly Hills sweetener you like,” Julia teased.
Rina moved to Julia and from behind slid her arms around her waist, resting her chin on Julia’s shoulder. “I think I can handle it, you know—‘cowgirl style.’” She kissed the back of Julia’s neck.
Julia turned around and slipped beyond Rina. She picked up the pile of clean horse blankets and dropped them in front of the hot fire, then stared into her lover’s eyes. “Oh? You sure about that?”
Rina shot her her hottest Oscar-worthy come-on look. “Try me—Cowgirl.”
The all-consuming fire had long been reduced to embers and ash. Rina rolled on top of Julia and kissed her again, savoring the warmth of Julia’s breasts pressed against her own—the wool blankets haphazardly covering their naked bodies from the waist down. “The rain stopped an hour ago. Shouldn’t we head back to the ranch?”
Julia grinned. “Damn, I was hoping you hadn’t noticed.”
Rina looked down into her lover’s eyes. “I could stay like this with you forever.”
“Careful, you’re such a great actress, I’ll believe you.”
“You should believe me. I mean it.”
“But it’ll never happen.”
“Why do you say that?”
“You’d miss your big life.”
“My ‘big’ life?”
“Compared to mine? Compared to well, anyone, yeah, your life is very big.”
“Hmm. You’re right. It is a big life.”
Julia sighed when Rina rolled to her side. “I can’t believe you’re leaving tomorrow to go home and then on location. I’m starting to feel withdrawal symptoms, and you were inside me until five minutes ago.”
“I know what you mean. You go out to the barn and I’m jonesing for your touch. But once I’m on set and see the shooting schedule, I’ll look for a time when you can fly in for a day or two. I had Gigi check flights from Palm Springs to Vancouver. It only takes a few hours.”
“Are you sure that would be okay? To have me up there…you know, while you’re working? With Britney Cavell?”
“I don’t know how I’ll make it through without seeing you. I really want you to come. Say you’ll come to see me.”
Julia tossed her lover her favorite grin—the sarcastic one. “I don’t know, Katarina. It’s an awfully long ride for a booty call.”
“Oh you’re a bad, bad girl, Ms. Dearling.”
Julia lifted an eyebrow. “Ms. Dearling?”
“Yes. Oh! You mean hot sex in a cabin wasn’t included in the riding lesson?”
“The lesson and the sex? Compliments of the Y2.”
Rina stroked Julia’s soft hair. “You always only give. Before you, I’d never been with someone who wasn’t trying to get something from me.”
“Who says I’m not?” Julia teased.
“Let’s cut to the chase then. What is it you want?”
“You—all over me. Forever.”
The shock of pure honesty—the sensation of Julia, and of being truly loved, momentarily caused Rina to stop breathing. She took a deep breath finally but remained speechless.
“Rina, I hate that by this time tomorrow you’ll be gone.” Julia stroked Rina’s cheek—gazed into eyes that had mesmerized audiences around the world—eyes that in this moment were meant only for her. “Your eyes are a color I’ve never seen before.”
“Which one?”
“Sad.”
“What color is that?”
“Gray.”
Rina stared at the embers before speaking. “I need to know that you won’t leave me while we’re apart.”
“Have you not been paying attention here? Now why would I ever do that?”
“You’re young, beautiful, and ridiculously sexy. I’m sure there are plenty of women who would say yes to you and that great ass without a second thought.”
Julia frowned. “But I wouldn’t be asking. I only want you. Then again, there must be stables of women I don’t know about who pursue you.” She paused. “You wouldn’t string me along if you wanted to date someone else, though, right?”
Rina scoffed. “Why would you even think that? Why would I ever want anyone else when there is you?”
“I have a long history of trusting people I shouldn’t—of not knowing someone’s leaving until they do.”
Rina wrapped herself around her naked lover and whispered into her ear. “It seems to me that we’re ready to make some kind of commitment.”
“You mean you want to…like…go steady?”
Rina pulled back. “What? Steady!”
Julia laughed. “Well, yeah. You’re never going to put a ring on it—which became pretty clear from our conversation on the beach.”
“Julia Dearling, I never said any such thing!”
“It’s implied. If you never come out, how can you be married?”
“I never really looked at it that way. Don’t change the subject. I want a commitment from you.”
“You’re so dramatic.”
“Julia. We all play to our strengths.”
“Really? A commitment?”
Rina chuckled. “Right now, you have the goofiest grin. I don’t want you to feel pressured, especially if you’re not ready. Bu
t what do you say, Julia? Want to ‘go steady’?”
“I say our clothes are dry, and that it’s time to mount up and head home.”
Rina withdrew and went silent.
Julia kissed her lips. “Are you kidding me? I’d love to go steady with you.”
“I can’t believe I have to use the term, ‘going steady.’” Rina squinted at her. “It’s bad enough we have almost a thirty-year age difference.”
Julia waited a beat. “Twenty-six.”
Rina hesitated. “Right. Twenty-six.”
“And a half.”
Chapter Thirty-One
Julia sat on the edge of the bed, and Rina allowed the awkwardness between them to settle into the desert stillness. With the window open, she inhaled the ranch essence that would have to last her for the next few months, savored Thunder’s neigh from the hitching post off the porch. She glanced at Julia in the mirror and smiled into her eyes.
“I wish it was still yesterday—up in the cabin,” said Julia.
“Where did the last twenty-four hours go?”
“They’re where all memories of us go—locked away deep inside me for safekeeping.” Julia leaned forward, her elbows on her knees.
“I don’t know exactly when I’ll be able to call, but I will as soon as I can,” Rina said as she put on her earrings. “The call I got this morning? After all the table reads, they’ve decided to do some rewrites while we’re filming—more lines to learn.”
“Don’t worry about it.” Julia sat up and held her gaze. “This? What we have…was never supposed to have happened in the first place, let alone last.”
Rina spun around to face her. “But I asked you to ‘go steady’ and you accepted. I know you, Julia. You’re waiting for that other shoe to drop. But it won’t. I simply won’t have it.”
“I’m saying that I’m not asking for promises, Rina. Life has a strange way of intervening no matter what we want. Asking me to go steady is a beautiful gesture on your part, but it’s not like we’re engaged. You’ll be far away, spending every day with Britney—costar, ex-lover—and there’s nothing I can do about that.”
“Why do you have to be such a grown-up?”
Julia stood and crossed the room. “Because someone has to be.”
“But…”
Julia interrupted her by placing her finger gently against Rina’s lips. “I have a lot to do once you’re gone. Besides my normal diner schedule, the catering business is picking up, your sculpture is in dire need of attention. There are also the horses and then my sister’s wedding to plan.”
“But you’ll wait for me?” Rina asked softly.
“Will you come back to me?”
Rina sighed. “I told you, I’m not interested in Britney!”
“You never answered me when I asked if she was still interested in you.”
“It doesn’t matter. I don’t care what she wants.”
“Maybe you’ll care after a month with her. She understands your world.”
“But you understand me. I’m done talking about her.” Rina fished through her case and pulled out the small square red box. She peeled back the lid and presented the delicate pink gold necklace to Julia.
Julia tilted the box and read from the inside of the lid. “Cartier?”
“I found the interlocking rings and chain so beautiful in pink gold.” Rina turned the box so that she could remove the chain. “It’s called the Love necklace. Appropriate, isn’t it?” She put the box down and displayed the chain across both of her hands.
“I know you, too, Rina. You planned this, didn’t you?”
Rina smiled from the corner of her lips. “I really wanted to give you a little token to make you smile before I left.”
“But I have nothing to give you.”
“Julia, what you have given me is worth more than all of these in the world.” She unlocked the clasp.
“That’s so beautiful—you don’t need to give me that.”
“Oh, but I do.” She walked behind Julia, draped it around her neck, and hooked it together. “Will you keep it on at least until we’re together again?”
Julia touched it gently and turned to face Rina. “Always…except when I’m afraid something will happen to it.” She kissed her lover. “I love you with every breath and that’s not going to change—except for the fact that when you’re not with me…”
“Don’t look down.” Rina gently lifted Julia’s chin until their eyes met. “What is it? You can say anything to me.”
“I feel so empty without you. It’s a god-awful feeling. Hollow—as if all that I am leaves with you every time.”
Rina held her close. “I feel it too—it’s called being in love. But we have phones, and FaceTime…”
Julia smirked. “And a shooting schedule, in addition to everything else I mentioned.”
“It will work out, okay?”
Julia gazed into her eyes and then gathered Rina’s belongings. “Your driver is waiting. Come on, I’ll bring your suitcase downstairs.”
Rina waited until Julia was halfway down the stairs. Her gaze danced slowly around the bedroom, snapping every mental picture she could catalogue. She picked up Julia’s pillow and pressed it to her face. Her eyes closed, she inhaled deeply—then she did it again. The tear that escaped barely made it onto her cheek before she wiped it away.
Rina descended the steps slowly and stared into her lover’s eyes.
Julia held up takeout containers from the Starlight. “I packed some healthy snacks for your ride home.”
Rina panned the great room and the cold fireplace with the logs that had burned to nothing while they had made love in its warmth. She ached for more. The chill of saying goodbye ran rampant through her, and for a moment she froze in place—unwilling to go back to a life that Julia didn’t inhabit. She slowly approached the sculptress, wordless, her breathing irregular.
“It’s okay, Rina. I’m not an actor, so we don’t have to say goodbye with awkward silences and dramatic pauses.”
“Yes, we do. It’s the dramatic pauses that make or break the scene. And in case you’ve forgotten…”
Julia touched Rina’s lips. “I could never forget.”
“Sometimes you’re maddening.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re just letting me go. Scenes likes this one are supposed to contain drama and passion and tension.”
“What makes you think this one doesn’t? Or do you just not know how to play the scene?” Julia smiled into Rina’s welcoming eyes. “I can still see our first hello and every single moment right up till now—our goodbye. Perhaps you’ve forgotten what passion and tension feel like in real life.”
“It’s more like—I’ve never known.”
“Wow, you really do know how to deliver a line.”
Julia cradled Rina’s hand, closed the space between them and spoke softly into her ear. “Whatever happens, or doesn’t, I’m in love with you, Katarina Verralta. Keep that with you in good times and not-so-good times.”
Rina grabbed Julia and kissed her with all the passion she knew how to convey. She tried to say the words—she desperately wanted to say them. Inside her head, she screamed them. Marry me, Julia. Her lips parted, but only her breath escaped.
Julia smiled, her emotion causing a quiver to pull at her lips. “It’s time.” Julia walked outside and handed the suitcase to Rina’s driver. He placed it in the trunk and opened the limo door.
“Give us a moment,” Rina said to her chauffeur. She waited for him to get into the car.
“I’ll call you when I get settled,” said Rina.
“Baby, don’t make promises you may not keep. You know how I feel about you, and you know where I live. Text me when you get home so I know you made it?”
Rina nodded, wiped a tear that escaped, and then smiled. “Leaving you is torture.”
“Well, that’s a whole lot better than if being with me was torture.”
Rina chuckled. “Leave it to you t
o find the bright side.” She touched Julia’s hand and got into the car.
Julia closed her door, then unhitched Thunder from the post on the porch, and mounted him bareback. As they accompanied the limo down the long dusty drive, Julia smiled down at Rina, who stared up at her through the window. When they arrived at the gate, Julia dismounted to lock it and wave goodbye.
Rina’s last view of her lover was of her closing the gate to the Y2, with Julia on the wrong side of the fence.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Three lonely weeks had passed before Julia smiled willingly. Each day since Rina’s departure, she’d found herself making excuses for her lover when she hadn’t heard from her. Rina lives a big life, in an important world, she told herself. She’s filming, learning lines, working for her next Oscar. Then Julia would push it all from her mind to sculpt or cook or ride—whatever it had taken to keep her sane in the moment.
Julia jumped off the porch with her arms opened wide. “You made it!”
Vitty brought the rental car to an abrupt halt and hopped out to embrace her sister. “Hi, Juju!”
While they hugged with a vengeance, Vitty’s fiancé David got out of the car and walked toward them. “Wow, it really is like I’m seeing double!” Tall and fit with a shock of pitch-black wavy hair and a bright smile, Julia’s future brother-in-law leaned in for a hug.
“Great to finally meet you in person,” he said.
“I’ll say! You weren’t kidding, Vitty. He sure is tall and handsome.”
Vitty put her arm around his waist. “And smart and sweet. David, you’re the real deal.”
He leaned into her. “I must have something to have landed your sister, Julia.”
“Well, welcome home, you two! How was the drive from Palm Springs?”
David raised his eyebrows and his eyes widened. “Your sister is a speed demon, so we made ridiculously good time.”
“It’s a family trait,” said Julia. “We Dearlings grew up in wide open spaces, so we know what to do with them.”
David laughed. “Vittoria reminds me regularly. White knuckles and all, I finally get to visit the famous Y2 and see what all the fuss is about.”
Vitty pointed west toward the rose-colored twilight sky. “Just wait until tomorrow when I take you riding up that mountain.”
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