by V L Friends
“What are you two talking about?” I murmured and rubbed my eyes.
“Hmm? Nothing, love.” Julian looked away dismissively before scooping me up in his arms, like I weighed nothing, and carrying me to my room. I tried to protest but he only squeezed tighter. What was with these two? When had they turned so suffocating?
This was not the only time I had woken up on the couch to one or both of them staring at me. It was getting weird. I decided to speak to Shane about it one day when he and I were taking one of our routine morning walks.
“You know what I think? I think that, given the fact that walkers are not generally taken to love, it is surprising them that they are in love.” You are showing them new things that they have not felt before. That in itself has to be scary for both of them.” Shane’s eyes twinkled as he said this. It wasn’t the normal kind of twinkle, but I actually saw a white sparkle. That was weird.
Caleb invited Shane to build his house next to the lake not far from the Alexander home. I questioned if that was what he really wanted, not wanting to drag him away from his life, but he insisted.
“My life is with you, Anaya, if you will have me, of course,” he said.
“Of course!” I was so thrilled to have someone normal back in my life.
When suggesting that he stay in the Alexander house, as he was like family, they all looked at me in horror. Okay, I guess I get it. It’s weird… Shane and Julian, even at their most civil moments, looked at each other like they were on the brink of killing one another. They acted like they were rivals of some sort. One good thing about having Lucian gone, I could listen in on conversations again with ease, even when I was in the stable, without him blocking me.
“She is not leaving this house, Shane! Anaya belongs here and this is where she will live!” said Julian.
“So, you think you own her… like you have some kind of claim to her?” Shane was accusatory.
“I do… she is my blood!” Julian yelled.
“You can’t own a human, Julian! She will be safer and better if she stayed with me!” said Shane.
“Hmm, let’s just examine how that is going to look, shall we?” Julian’s tone of voice changed to his mocking, snarky tone. “People will wonder about a handsome young pastor living with a young pretty girl. I can just hear the rumors circulating about a pastor and his young playmate girlfriend shacking up together. What are you going to tell everyone… that you’re her father? No one will believe you!”
Julian was getting meaner and more sarcastic by the minute.
“Ya know, I am curious… just what is your interest in my daughter and just what would the other angels think of you being so obsessed with her? You must be dangerously teetering on getting yourself cast down for getting too attached with your human.”
Shane seemed unmoved by Julian’s provocative words. “Ya know, Julian, you forget how well I know your tactics. This baiting me to get a rise out of me is an old tactic. I had hoped you had grown a little or, at the very least, gotten less predictable.”
Wait a second… Did they say ‘other angels’? No way! Was Shane a…?
I dropped the horse brush and forgot to breathe for a second as I rewound their conversation in my head.
Yep, Julian definitely said Shane was an angel!
I had been in the stables brushing Cleo and Chester so I’m guessing it must have been a shock to hear the door slam open and me in all my fury, not to mention boots tracking in mud everywhere, flying in with that wild look in my eyes.
“What the hell?!” I bellowed at the three.
Shane’s eyes were wide.
“What is it?” they said in unison. The two looked worried. The look they were giving me was as though I had an accident or was hurt.
Caleb was sitting in a chair in the corner quietly listening to their conversation. I was sure he already knew what was coming.
My arms folded on my chest and my eyes took turns burning into each one of theirs.
“Oh, did I not mention that she can hear every word we say if she tunes in from any place here in the estate? She has grown into her super hearing. I didn’t, did I? My bad,” Julian was smug.
“What did he mean by ‘other angels’, Shane?” I demanded.
Shane reached out to me, seeing that I was on the edge.
“Anaya, this isn’t the time. We should go talk.” His voice was gentle and coaxing as he held out his arms to me.
“No!” I stepped back out of reach. “I want to know now. Tell me!”
“This isn’t the way I wanted to tell you.” He had that pleading look but I ignored it, feeling pain welling up inside me.
I looked over at Julian, suddenly realizing that this was his plan. He purposely let it slip this way to gain the advantage. I was not happy with him right now either.
“What are you?” I demanded, but tears formed in my eyes and my voice cracked with pain.
“Anaya, Shane is your guardian angel. He has been with you in the form of a man since you were born.” A soothing voice sounded from the corner of the room. Caleb could see that I was teetering on a breakdown so he calmly took the lead.
“You knew!” I shot Caleb an accusing glare.
My head felt hot and my eyes stung with this betrayal. Shane had been my father figure. My mother had been called friends of angels but never for a second had I thought she was living with one. That one was raising her child. Oh God!
“I only just recently found out.” Caleb defended.
My eyes went to Shane.
“You have been lying to me all of my life.” I began to back away. I needed to get away from these people that called themselves my family. They all kept this from me. I needed to get far away from them. I turned and darted out the front door past the driveway and into the woods. I ran until my feet were blistered inside my boots. Deep beyond the trails, into the brush, over fallen trees and logs and finally I stopped and collapsed. There were 40 acres of land here and I had not explored this part yet, so I had no idea where I was. I could hear the river though. I knew that the river flowed near town so I decided to walk alongside it, still not knowing what I would do next. I was winging it. All I knew was that I was not going home.
My guess was that it was around dinnertime, as many families flocked to the diners to feast. I had to shed my boots and now walked barefoot, carrying them. I wore only jeans and a tank top so I was beginning to feel a chill. I decided to chance walking into a small diner that Caleb frequented, in order to perhaps get them to start a tab so I could eat. Fitting my boots back on my now-swollen blistered feet was no easy task, but I managed. Sitting at a booth, I signaled a waitress. They were all too accommodating to me, as they knew my uncle well.
I sat back and relaxed as if I didn’t have a care in the world after a full stomach and continued sipping my root beer. A figure outside staring in the window made me jump. At first, I thought I was seeing a ghost, maybe reliving a scene from the walking dead, but then realized it was only Julian, doing what he did, which was glaring down at me the way he usually did as if stalking his prey.
I groaned at the sight of my stalker. He is so frickin’ annoying. I couldn’t look at him anymore. Even when he quietly slid in the seat in front of me, I did not look up.
“Your family is worried about you. You could have been eaten by a bear, or perhaps a panther.”
I looked up to meet his gaze and we exchanged a humorous look.
“I don’t have any family,” I snapped back with a bitterness that even stopped my heart.
“Don’t be ridiculous!” Julian snapped.
“Leave me alone, Julian.”
“Caleb and I did not do this to you. It was not our secret to tell.” Julian leaned in, flattening his hands on the table, and spoke with frustration.
I scoffed. “Is that the answer you are sticking with? Because that is a lame excuse.”
“What are you going to do? Stay here all night? Come home. We will work this out tomorrow,” he said, try
ing not to raise his voice.
I shook my head.
“I don’t belong with any of you. Until I can figure out for myself how to be with you, I need to stay away from you. You keep things from me. You have many secrets. I will only keep getting the rug ripped out from under me. No, I have to figure some things out on my own so I can stand on my own no matter what.”
“Anaya, Louis may have told the supernatural community that you are no threat but I am convinced he is planning something. Until I can find out what he is up to, you are not safe to be on your own, unprotected. Not to mention, you know as well as I do there will be plenty of supernaturals who still want assurance and will stop at nothing to rid this world of a threat to their ways. Besides, where will you stay? How will you eat? You can figure all that stuff out from your place at home, our home.”
“I don’t know anything yet but I will figure it out,” I said, getting up. I began to walk but, to my embarrassment, the pain in my feet caused me to limp as I let out a wince of pain.
“What is wrong with you?” Julian’s arm shot out to steady me.
“My feet,” I said.
He gently eased me back down to sit.
“I will be right back. Do not move from that place. Do you hear me?” His finger went up in my face as a warning gesture.
I nodded in obedience. Where the heck would I go if I couldn’t walk?
It was a few minutes but Julian appeared with a first aid kit, something in a brown bag, some soft shoes, and a jean jacket.
“Up we go,” he said as he helped me to my feet.
Across the street, Julian set me down on a picnic table and began slowly, carefully taking off my boots.
“Ow!” I hollered out in pain.
He pulled a bottle of whisky from the brown bag.
“This should help.”
Watching Julian being all nurturing while he cleaned and bandaged my feet became fascinating to me as I lay back on the table. Of course, it may very well have been the half a bottle of whisky I downed in a short amount of time, but I was starting to like him, just a little.
“So why are you here? This entire sensitive, nurturing thing isn’t really you,” I said with a bit of a slur.
His eyes looked at me with a sparkle of amusement.
“He can read your thoughts and detected your mood. I am more prepared for dealing with your… let’s just say, more hostile moods,” he said with a grin.
I let out a snort.
“What a pansy,” I scoffed. Then giggled.
“I am sure Caleb would not enjoy that remark.” Julian chuckled as he lay down on the picnic table next to me.
We lay there together gazing up at the starlit night and breathed in the silent beauty.
“Julian? You have changed. You are not as… mean,” I said, still gazing up. My eyelids were becoming heavy.
“Oh, I am still quite mean. I’m just soft on you, love,” he said with a wink.
That made me chuckle.
“Julian?” I said, starting to drift off as I nuzzled my head against his shoulder.
“Yes, love?”
“Thank you…” My eyes shut. “… and I love you.”
I awoke to find my head resting in Julian’s lap and the smell of fresh coffee. Julian was holding it near my nostrils strategically, trying to wake me. We were still on the picnic table and my eyes opened to the bright morning sun.
I let out a groan at my pounding head.
“Not a morning person, are you?” Julian said with light amusement.
I sat up and ran a hand through my hair, trying to focus.
“Coffee?” Julian handed me a paper cup that smelled heavenly.
I took it and thanked him.
“You stayed here all night with me?” I meant it as more of a statement than a question.
“Of course I did,” he replied, as if insulted at my question.
“Well, I was half expecting you to do what you have done in the past and force me over your shoulder kicking and screaming, dragging me home with you,” I said.
“Hmm, well I guess you might say I have turned over a new leaf. Besides, you would only run off again and would be angry with me. My chances of getting near you would be slim. So, I decided to help you.” He looked at me with a twinkle in his eyes.
I was not sure of what to say to him, as I was still trying to wake up. I had no plan of what I was going to do or where I was going to go. I had no money and no idea what to do next. I just stared off into space.
Julian interrupted my blank stare and took his fingers to grip my chin as he pulled my head so I was looking into his blue eyes.
“I am assuming you have no plan, so I took it upon myself this morning, while you were snoring away in your stupor, to secure you a place to stay, temporarily, mind you. Behind the church is a theatre and on the second floor of the theatre there is a room that I took the liberty of renting. The owner said you can stay there and be the groundskeeper of the place for the cost of rent. He said he will hire you to be a janitor of the place for a small wage.” Julian stood and handed me my jean jacket and boots. “Whatever you need from the house, call me, and I will have Rosa bring it by. When you are ready, you are welcome home.” He pulled me up into a quick hug and leaned back to look down at me.
“Thank you, Julian. I don’t know what to say,” I said.
“Say nothing but just give me a kiss and I will be on my way.” He tapped his cheek expectantly.
I reluctantly kissed him on the cheek. I got the feeling he was expecting my affection from now on. “Ugh,” I muffled out a quiet groan. “What will Caleb say?” I asked.
“I will handle him.” Julian kissed my forehead and turned away.
“Oh, by the way, Clarence will be watching over you. Do me a favor and do not even think about leaving this town without telling me.” He turned around and pointed at me then resumed his pace.
As I watched him until he disappeared, I noticed a large bulge in the inside pocket of my jean jacket. When my hand went into the pocket I pulled out a large wad of cash.
“Typical,” I said as I inwardly felt very grateful to have Julian looking out for me.
A loud squawk made me jump, then I felt the pounding in my head.
“Clarence!” I grabbed my still-throbbing head, groaning. The crow sat just inches from me on the picnic table.
It had been a week since I ran away to live in town and still had not seen nor spoken to Shane. Hating that I was such a chicken and was avoiding him, I made a plan that morning to do something about it today. Sure, he was really a heavenly being and, I will be honest, that intimidated the hell out of me. To think that a creature of light used to change my diapers! This was not something I could just pretend had not happened, like the time I had just walked in on him dressing in the bathroom when I was eleven.
My cheeks began to turn red as all the embarrassing things in my childhood that he had witnessed came flooding to mind. I clasped my hands over my burning cheeks.
“Oh God, oh God, oh God!” I mumbled to myself, still trying to wipe the memories.
Julian had mentioned that he was busy building his house and they had not even talked about me. Deciding that I also missed the woods and my waterfall, I ventured out for a long walk.
Before I even caught sight of the house in construction, I heard the sound of a saw and pounding hammers. From directly across the lake, as I walked by Shane’s house, I could feel a pair of eyes boring into me. Shane was watching me from the water’s edge as I passed on the other side of the lake. I gave him a sidelong look. No words were spoken, but he looked as if he were about to jump into the lake to get to me. I hurried along faster.
When I got to my place above the waterfall, I had a perfect view and saw several men working on Shane’s house to complete it. He was nowhere to be seen. I pulled out some food from my pack. I had eaten half a peanut butter sandwich and some grapes then took a sip from my bottled water. When done, I lay back on the flat rock to look
up at the sky.
It was not long before I could sense a familiar presence.
“I am not talking to you,” I said quietly.
“It is better that you don’t talk but just listen,” Shane’s voice said from the bushes. I never even turned to look.
I spoke on the verge of tears, “I miss you so much, it hurts!”
I was met with silence for a time.
“Anaya, let me be with you,” Shane said.
I said nothing and I guess he took that as an okay because I felt movement near me and hands pulled me close to him. I felt his breath on my temple. The smell of a mountain meadow with a hint of sawdust filled my nose. I wish I could have stayed in this very moment forever.
“It is understandable for you to have this kind of reaction to hearing about me. I imagine you have felt, at times, ill-equipped to deal with the world you are discovering. I sense your struggle here with your uncle and Julian and at times you have felt it to be more than you bargained for. They have left you in the dark about things. Some of their reasons have been for their own selfish preservation. I want to assure you that what I did was best for you. You did not need to know these things. You may not understand now but I promise you can continue to trust me. I have never given you any reason not to trust me, right?”
“When were you going to tell me?” I asked, still considering if I could trust him.
“I was about to. I would have preferred for it to be presented to you differently.”
I considered his words and even what he wasn’t saying. I remembered these many years he had sacrificed to spend time with me. To teach me things, to be there when I was sad or needed a parent to either hold me when I cried or to be that voice of reason when I was about to do something stupid, or someone to be my partner at a father-daughter dance. An image of me in the sixth grade running away from school crying, after Billy Otto humiliated me by breaking up with me before the entire school. It was Shane who tracked me down in the woods and climbed up that tree after me. He sat silently next to me, arm around me, until I cried my eyes out, then we talked for hours and I left those woods that night feeling more loved than ever before. Shane had been there every day for me since the beginning, and a twinge of regret hit me for leaving him and now being angry with him. This divine being had chosen to be with me all my life and I had done nothing to deserve his love and devotion. He and my mother both told me plenty about angels existing and stories about her adventures with them. They did not keep me completely in the dark. I could see that they wanted me to have as healthy and normal of a life as possible. I started to understand why he decided not to tell me who he really was. Most humans, I knew, did not co-exist with angels.