by Jaime Reese
He stared at Ben’s words. He debated how best to settle the rising tension in their exchange. He called up the video app on his phone, confident the default system app would be on Ben’s phone since it was the same model. A few seconds later, a picture of Ben’s face filled his screen. Bull had expected the flush of color present on Ben’s cheeks and the way he chewed on his bottom lip. But he hadn’t anticipated the redness and shine in Ben’s eyes.
“I’ll keep this short, then we’ll go back to text. Okay?”
Ben hesitantly nodded.
“Are you okay?”
Ben looked away for a moment and exhaled a shaky breath. There was a slight sniffle he tried to disguise before he returned his attention to the screen and nodded. He held his right hand in an “A” up to his chest and rotated his hand in a clockwise circle a few times. His expression pained.
“You have nothing to be sorry about,” Bull firmly said, refusing to let Ben think otherwise. “I promised I would keep this short and I know you don’t want to video chat. But I wanted you to look at me when I tell you what I need to say.”
Ben’s gaze didn’t waver.
“Honesty and trust. That’s what’s important. Okay?” He continued after receiving a nod in response. “I’ll earn your trust, but you need to give me honesty, and I’ll do the same in return. Okay?”
Ben nodded again.
“One more thing…”
Ben held his gaze.
“I don’t want to screw this up either.”
An exhale of relief escaped Ben, almost as if he had been holding his breath the entire time. A slow-building smile suddenly appeared. Bull couldn’t help grinning in return before keeping his word and disconnecting the video call. He called up his messaging app again, hoping to have eased the tension in their exchange.
He wasn’t ready to call it a night yet.
= ♥ =
Ben held the phone to his chest as he took another deep breath. The no had come quickly, almost as fast as the total freak-out afterward. Although he had joked with Julian the other night, Ben hadn’t realized how difficult saying no would actually be when he didn’t want to disappoint someone. Especially when he felt he had something to lose.
He didn’t know what was happening between them—a friendship or possibly something more—but he didn’t want to risk crushing it before it had a chance to bloom.
He pulled the phone away from his chest, quickly thumbing through the gallery of photos. Even though that dimple short-circuited his brain, he had managed to snap a screenshot of Gabriel’s smile before ending the video call. His breath hitched when he found the shot. He quickly assigned that smile and dimple to Gabriel’s contact record. His phone vibrated with a new message as soon as he hit save.
Now tell me why you got upset.
Ben huffed out a breath. He hated lying. Correction. He sucked at lying. Gabriel wanted honesty, that he could totally do. Texting is easier. It didn’t take long for Gabriel’s response to arrive.
You had already said that. So why did that upset you so much?
Ben scrunched his face, trying to think of the best—honest—answer. Because I knew you wanted to do video instead.
You thought I’d be upset?
Another easy reply. Yes.
So you thought saying NO to me would piss me off and somehow mess up whatever is happening between us?
He ducked his head as he typed out his reply. Yes. He hit send, then quickly added another short message. I know that sounds silly.
No. It’s not silly. It’s honest. Thank you.
Ben sucked in his bottom lip, wondering just how honest he should be. Some people would take advantage of too much honesty, but he sensed Gabriel wouldn’t do that. I don’t like disappointing people. He hit send, then plucked his lip with his fingers, waiting for Gabriel’s response. He straightened the moment the new text message appeared.
You can’t please everyone. At the end of the day, you need to make sure you can look at yourself in the mirror and be happy with who you see staring back at you.
He hadn’t realized he was nodding in agreement. The day he had been arrested, he’d caught a faint glimpse of himself reflected off the glass of the police car and hated himself for having made such a mistake. He closed his eyes and took a few steadying breaths, debating if he had enough courage to send the next text. He chose the safer answer instead. I prefer to text. The pause before the next text took an eternity.
Do you realize you’re bilingual?
He stared at the screen with a frown. No, just English.
Did you realize you just said NO to me and we’re still fine? :)
Ben chuckled. No. :) He was on a roll. He imagined Gabriel throwing his head back, laughing, and that dimple making an appearance.
English and ASL. They are both languages used to communicate. You have to learn ASL just like everybody else. And to make it even more complicated, the signs aren’t universal. Did you know there are over 100 different sign languages?
He sat up straighter in bed. Gabriel was both a fortune cookie and an encyclopedia No. Really?
You’ll become a NO master by the time we’re finished tonight.
Ben smiled as the next message appeared.
Other parts of the world have their own sign language and it sometimes varies from one region to another with different dialects.
I didn’t know that. Ben responded as he pursed his lips.
I learned a lot from Gramps.
The subject change to family eased the tension from Ben’s shoulders and spiked his curiosity. Tell me about your grandfather.
And he did. Gabriel texted about his beloved grandfather—his quirks, habits, and their weekends together. The loss of his grandfather was a deep cut, deepened only by the loss of his mom less than six months later from a ruptured brain aneurysm. His sister was a big part of his life while his relationship with his father was somewhat strained. It was a topic Ben suspected was best avoided. And since he didn’t want to dive into his own family history, he steered the conversation elsewhere.
They texted about Gabriel’s work and Ben’s love of junk food and sweets.
Before he had realized it, they had spent hours texting, getting to know each other. Breakfast would be served in a few hours, and as much as he tried, Ben could barely keep his eyes open anymore. He bit his lip and didn’t hesitate as he swiped across his screen and tapped the video app.
Within seconds, he was rewarded by a smiling—and very tired—Gabriel staring back at him.
“Hi,” Gabriel said. His hair was a tousled sexy mess and his expression relaxed. More pieces for the fantasy puzzle.
Ben smiled back. He flattened his right hand and placed the tips of his fingers on his chin, and then moved his hand out and forward until his fingertips pointed at Gabriel.
“Thank you,” Gabriel said, emphasizing the word by pointing at him.
They texted a good night at the same time. They stared at each other for another moment until finally ending the video call.
Ben sighed, unable to rid himself of the silly grin he knew was plastered on his face. Even though that mystical dimple was powerful, Ben suspected it would be the man who ultimately weakened him. The way Gabriel sensed when to back away from a subject or when to probe deeper. The simple way he explained something without sounding superior. Skillful ways he managed to raise Ben’s confidence, never once making him feel as if he were less than.
Nothing could have stopped Ben from initiating that video chat before going to bed.
Or from grabbing a screenshot of that easy sexy look on Gabriel’s face. Tapping through the screens, he found the new pic in his gallery. He swapped out the photo he had saved to his contact record a few hours before. He stared at it until his screen dimmed. Maybe he should set it to be his wallpaper? Or would that be too creepy? He cringed, deciding against it just as his phone vibrated with a new message.
Question for you.
Ben’s eyebrows twitched as
he wondered what could have lingered in Gabriel’s mind after they had called it a night.
Be honest. Did you take a screenshot of me?
A flood of heat surged up Ben’s neck and to his face. He was, literally, going to die from the amount of heat rising through his body. Or so he thought until his phone vibrated with another video call. Shit! There wasn’t a chance he was answering. A new message notification popped up on his phone.
Answer the call, Ben.
His ears were on fire. Shit, shit, shit, shit. He wanted to crawl into a deep dark hole and hide. His finger tapped at the screen, accidentally hitting the green answer button instead of the red to ignore the call. Holding the phone in one hand, he covered his face with the other. He wasn’t looking. No. Hell no.
Funny how the no came so easily when arguing with himself.
He could feel that brown gaze on him. Dammit. When his face cooled, Ben let his hand slip away. He peeked up at his screen, narrowing his eyes at Gabriel’s smiling face.
“I like making you blush.”
His heartbeat kicked up a bit. He typed out a quick message and hit send. Are you flirting with me?
Gabriel looked away for a moment, likely reading the message. He returned his full attention to Ben and smiled. “Is it working?”
Ben bit his lip, trying to hold back a smile as he nodded and thought to himself… Oh yeah, it’s definitely working.
“Good night, Ben. I had fun tonight.”
He held his right hand up with the “Y” sign and moved his hand toward himself, then outward toward the man staring at him with a big smile and tempting dimple. Me too. After disconnecting the call, he tucked his phone under the pillow.
He pushed his head into the soft material as the smile lingered and the flood of memory puzzles filled his mind.
Ben slid his hand under the pillow and silenced the vibration of the alarm on his phone. Barely three hours’ worth of sleep, but he wouldn’t have given up his time chatting with Gabriel. He stretched his arms out and yawned. Maybe he would grab a short nap after breakfast to catch up on the lost sleep. After double-checking the time, he quickly got out of bed, made a bathroom run, and then dressed. Pocketing his phone, he headed downstairs with a pep in his step.
“Good morning,” Julian signed when he entered the kitchen.
He smiled and peeked over at Matt, waving to him when he looked over. They worked together to set the table and lay out the banquet Matt had prepared. Just as quickly, they each served themselves a plateful and dug into their breakfast. He sipped his juice while Calvin stared at him from across the table, narrowing his eyes.
“You look happy.”
Thoughts of Gabriel and last night’s texting swirled in his mind. With the distraction, he hadn’t noticed Calvin’s work clothes. He grabbed his phone and typed out a quick note, holding it up to Calvin.
“Yeah, I’ve got to go into work today. There’s a meeting next week for some big company. People are coming into town early and picking up their cars today.” He shrugged. “I guess they’re making a vacation out of their trip.”
Ben typed out another short message. With Calvin’s theft on record, his options were limited in the work program. He didn’t mind washing and detailing cars for a rental company, but his fair skin was going to take one heck of a beating with today’s forecast.
Calvin leaned in to read the note. “Already on it. Hat’s by the door so I don’t forget.”
Ben nodded and downed another forkful of breakfast, enjoying the mix of flavors hitting his tongue. He reached for his juice and noticed Calvin staring at him again. He cocked his head, questioning.
“Why did your friends screw you over?”
That was the same question he had asked himself multiple times. He shrugged and pushed the food around in his plate.
Calvin reached across the table and tapped his forearm. Ben glanced up. “I know why they did it.”
Because I’m too gullible and trusting? He wasn’t sure he wanted to hear Calvin’s response.
“Because they were assholes.” He gave Julian the side-eye, refusing to turn away from Ben. “Yeah, Julian, I said that. You can ground me later.” He returned his firm gaze to Ben. “They were only out for themselves. They didn’t care who they hurt as long as they got what they wanted. It doesn’t make sense otherwise. I’ve known you less than a month and I want to wrap you in a foam bubble and kick everyone’s ass.”
Ben couldn’t hold back the chuckle. He flattened his right hand and placed the tips of his fingers on his chin, then moved his hand out and forward until his fingertips pointed at Calvin.
Calvin quickly glanced to his side at Julian, nodded, and then returned his attention to Ben. “You don’t have to thank me. I should be thanking you for showing me there are people who aren’t hateful, spiteful, and selfish.” He stopped and rolled his eyes. “Yes, Julian, you and Matt too.” He shook his head as he looked at Ben. “They’re so needy sometimes.”
They shared a laugh as they each bumped shoulders with the house owners, Julian at Calvin’s side and Matt at Ben’s.
Calvin waved his hand in the air, snatching Ben’s attention again. “All kidding aside…” He placed the tips of his fingers on his chin and then moved his hand out and forward, pointing his fingertips toward Ben. “Did I do that right?”
A swell of emotions rose in Ben’s chest. A simple gesture, but it was the effort behind the signed thank-you that struck him most. With a huge grin spread across his face, he nodded. Repeatedly, almost bouncing in his chair.
Glancing at his watch, Calvin stuffed the last of his toast in his mouth and pushed it all down with a final chug of juice. He and Julian stood from the table and were out the door with a wave goodbye.
After they finished eating, Ben helped Matt clear the table and wash the dishes. He dried the last of the plates as Matt dried his hands.
“Jessie invited us over to their house today. Interested?”
He dug his phone out of his back pocket and typed out a quick note. I don’t want to impose. You guys go ahead.
Matt clipped the towel on the oven handle and turned to face him. “We can’t leave you alone at the house. Come with us or we all stay.”
He bit his lower lip. He really didn’t want to impose.
Matt’s raised finger caught his attention. “One thing I forgot to mention. Jessie told me to tell you that Bull would be there.”
Ben couldn’t have stopped the silly grin on his face if he tried.
“I’ll take that as a yes,” Matt said.
Ben threw the toy across the yard again and waited for King to fetch it. The small dog was a hyperactive hairball, prancing on the grass like a miniature reindeer. There was no doubt in Ben’s mind the dog’s name was Aidan’s way of overcompensating. He glanced over at the detective and rolled his lips into his mouth, fighting a smile.
“That dog is going to have you doing that all day long if you let him.”
Ben shrugged, waiting for King to return.
The tiny furball hopped its way back toward them, the toy bone in its mouth bigger than its little body. Aidan shook his head and turned toward Ben, hands shoved into his pockets. “I know what you’re thinking.”
Ben arched an eyebrow. King dropped the toy and ran in a small circle in front of him. Ben grabbed the toy and took a step forward, pitching it out into the yard again, smiling as the tiny dog hopped in the grass to retrieve the toy. Again. Ben looked over his shoulder at Aidan and circled his hand repeatedly in the air, prompting Aidan to just spill it.
“You’re wondering how I ended up with a dog like that?”
Ben shrugged and nodded.
“When Jess was a kid, he used to play with the neighbor’s dog. He loved that little thing. Not the same breed, but just as small.” Aidan stopped when King approached, running and hopping in a circle around him with the toy bone in his mouth. He petted the dog and said something Ben couldn’t decipher, then pitched the toy out into the yard agai
n. Aidan turned back toward Ben. “We’ve got a friend named Dylan. The man wants a home for every stray he finds. I know he was messing with me when he gave me that dog, but he did me a favor. Because the look on Jessie’s face when I brought that little guy home…” He took a deep breath and shook his head.
With all his bluster, Aidan was obviously a softie when it came to his partner.
“That’s why we named him King.” Aidan gave him a half smile. “That little pooch can get whatever he wants with a wag of his tiny tail.”
Aidan spun around and knelt in the grass when a second, larger dog came barreling toward him. “Luna!” He spoke to the dog as he scratched behind its ear, but Ben couldn’t make out any additional words. The way Aidan pursed his lips as he spoke distorted any chance of reading those lips. Aidan’s attention snapped to the side as he scowled. “Fuck you.”
That…he clearly read.
Ben glanced over toward the target of Aidan’s aimed curse. He smiled and waved hello as Gabriel strutted toward them. Ben turned back toward Aidan, finally understanding some of the words he spoke to the bigger dog. “C’mon, girl, let’s go see the real boss of this house,” Aidan said as he stood, brushing the grass from his jeans. He patted Ben on the back as he walked away with the dog at his side, calling King to follow.
“Hi,” Gabriel signed and smiled. “He was baby talking to her.”
Ben nodded. “That’s why I couldn’t understand him. Thank you,” he signed.
Gabriel extended his hand, pointing toward a small table with two chairs under one of the large trees in the yard. He brushed off the leaves from both seats, then pulled the chairs closer, next to each other. Ben took a seat and set his phone on the table, rubbing his palms against his jeans.
Pulling his phone out from his back pocket, Gabriel tapped at the screen, turning the display toward Ben when he finished. I want to ask you about something, but I don’t want you to get upset.
With a huge grin splitting his face, Ben reached for his own phone and tapped out a note. You got the app on your phone?