by C C Monroe
“I knew you loved my ass.” Startled, I look up and see Kingston standing in the doorway with two bags. I must not have heard him come in while I was reminiscing. His sideways smirk is present, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. Matching my pain, I see how bad this is hurting not just me, but us.
“You came back.” I feel the tears coming back as I look up at his distraught face.
“I was so pissed I almost didn’t, then I drove around and found a Target.” I smirk limply not sure why he went there and its significance. My brows furrow, questioning him. “I wandered to the baby aisle and I started to think about our baby. What if it’s a girl, baby? What if she’s so sweet and kind just like you?” Kingston asks, moving over to sit next to me on the carpet, stretching his legs out under the table.
“Then I thought maybe it’s a boy and what if I raise him to be a piece of shit like me?”
“Kingston.” His words are far too demeaning. Kingston is a lot of things, but a shitty person is not one.
“No Lana, I’m too fucking pushy sometimes, too smug, I’m an arrogant prick.” He slides the bags onto the table in front of us and hangs his head. “I bought a little girls outfit and a little boys outfit. The little boys outfit matches one of mine and I bought you a matching dress, in case it’s a girl.” His kind words push me over the edge, renewing my desire for him. Kingston never ceases to surprise me, one minute being an arrogant caveman and the next my giant teddy bear—my protector—my best friend.
“You deserve better, but I’m too selfish to let you go. I’m sorry I hid this...” I apologize, moving the box from my lap in a hurried motion.
Pushing his back against the couch, I throw my leg over his waist and straddle him. Knowing exactly what I want is what we both need. I don’t even give him a chance to respond before our lips touch fast and hard, mine moving while his stay still, trying to catch up to my sudden invasion. He tastes familiar, like home—I haven’t kissed him in days. I let my body grind against him waking my libido, she’s desperate for a piece of her King.
Moaning against his soft lips I grab hold of Kingston’s bottom lip and tug it, causing him to growl hungrily like an animal. His lust filled eyes are creased into slits and I know what’s about to happen and I don’t stop it. I’m ready to try for him. I’m not ready to completely give in overnight, but I think I’m ready to try. Ready to start opening up the doors of possibility. I hope it’s enough for now, I hope it’s enough to get me where I know we both want to be. Together. Forever.
Watching and feeling Lana grind on me while taking hot selfish kisses has me fucking seduced. My heart is pounding so loud my ears can feel the vibration. My throat is growing tight and suddenly a wave of reality swallows me whole. This isn’t just about Lana and me, or even about fighting to make Lana mine, it’s now about making Lana and the little life we created, family.
I thought I was fighting before, well that pales in comparison, because I’m not letting her refuse us the happiness we both desire, crave—deserve, damn it. We’re going to be a family and she better be ready for me, because she is no longer the only thing that is mine to hold and protect, so is our little creation. I’m coming to collect the other halves to my soul where emptiness sits. My family.
“You have to be willing to try for us, Lana. Can you do that?” Pulling back, I place my hands on her dainty thighs and rub the smooth skin. She chews her lip nervously playing with the bill of my hat behind me.
“I can try to let you in more, but I just need a little more time to be something more than friends.” I almost stop to protest but she cuts me off.
“But I can promise I’ll try, for you, for our baby.” She grabs my hand from its place on her thigh and lays it comfortably against her tiny little belly. I can’t argue with trying, it’s better than a no. That and my hand on her tiny stomach where our baby is growing—how can I even say no?
“Fine. That’ll do—for now.” She smirks and looks down at my chest. I flex my pecs so they bounce up and down and she giggles. That sound is fucking beautiful.
“You like what you see?”
“I would like it better if you would demonstrate on me, what I’d like to see.”
I smirk devilishly. One thing about Lana that drives me up the fucking wall with joy, is when she talks dirty. I met my fucking match with this woman. She likes dirty talk and even dirtier sex.
“Tell me how your body feels, tell me what pregnancy is doing to you, baby.” I’ve heard the rumors about pregnancy making women horny and needy, more so than usual. All things I want Lana to be with me. She just nods her head up and down and licks her pouty pink lips.
“My tits ache, they feel heavy and I just keep thinking of your strong hands kneading them to feel better.” She guides my hands from her stomach to her tiny tits, they feel so good. I want to see those nipples in my face, taste them on my lips, against my tongue.
“Then my pussy, mmmm. It aches for you, bad. Feels wet and empty. So warm and tight. It needs you.” Lana thrust her hips against my hard-on, letting out a shaky breath when she feels the painfully hard friction. I’m enjoying the fucking show right here. Her grinding on me and letting me squeeze her tits. Any man would be lucky to have this perfect, dirty queen grinding against him. Too bad no other man will ever get this lucky—Lana James is permanently marked by me with our child.
“You’re a bad, dirty little thing. Let me take you to bed and take care of those needs.” She leans back reaching down for my belt. Her brown eyes stay locked on mine while she undoes my belt, looking like a huntress.
I reluctantly pull my hands off her hips and push up from the floor. Like my little monkey she holds onto me and sucks on my neck while I rush us down the hall, my hands tight on her firm, creamy ass.
Her door is cracked open. Using my foot I kick it the rest of the way, charging into her room. I’m two feet away from her bed when I throw her across the room and she lands on the bed, bouncing off it, then back down.
“Kings!”
“Lay there and don’t fucking move.” Panting heavily she complies. Removing my jeans, I walk around the bed while removing my shirt. Her eyes are devouring me, watching every little move I make as I watch her grow needier by the minute. Her cat eyes follow me, watching me closely.
“Kingston. Please.”
“Don’t beg, my Queen.”
“I have to, I need you too much. I need my man.” I stop midway when I make it to her bedside table. I know she keeps her vibrator in there. I was planning to use it, but fuck that. She wants me now and I need her with the same ferocity.
Thankful that she’s only in my large sleep shirt, I smile at the knowledge of knowing she stole that shirt from me. She looks tiny and innocent in my things, but little does the world know that inside that innocent looking woman is a sexy fucking minx just begging to be let out.
“Lift my top up baby, show me what you’re wearing under there.” Grinning at me seductively she does what I tell her to. I watch the material move up her stomach inch by painfully slow inch, making my cock grow so hard it’s about to burst out of my briefs.
Disappointed when she stops the shirt just below her small breasts, I do my best to hide my frustration. I want to see her scars, I want to kiss them away and replace them with only memories of me. Nonetheless, I don’t want to get into it with her, we just made up and she agreed to try with me. That will do for tonight.
“Look at those legs, those cute fucking knees, your tiny little thighs.” Climbing up her body I bite and nip at all those places, eliciting excited little moans to come from her lips. Her pleasure sounds are like music to my ears. I’ve loved singing and playing guitar my entire life and I have to say some of the best melodies I have written have been inspired by her erotic little moans.
My lips stop between her thigh and pelvic bone, that sexy crease where her skin is covered by barely there black lace. She’s smells so good, like peach and arousal. Nectar to the Kings like me.
Sliding her pant
ies aside I’m welcomed with the sexiest pussy I have ever tasted. I want to eat her all night, lick her clean. Flicking my eyes up, I expect to see Lana in a sex coma with her back arched and her sexy hair splayed all over the bed. I about set off in my pants when I see my eager queen gazing down at me, waiting for me to eat her. I keep my eyes locked on hers, green to brown eyes fucking each other with that one solid look.
I get right to it, licking from her tight center up to her swollen clit. She hisses and I just stare at her, tempting her to not look away, to look ecstasy in the eye. I lick hard circles around her entrance, splaying my hand across her lower stomach, my thumb rubbing matching circles on her clit. I smirk when she grows even wetter with each roll of my tongue. Pregnancy has made her more responsive and sweeter—I didn’t think that shit was possible.
“Kings!” I feel her throb against my tongue, coming hard, faster than I was expecting. I lap her juices up, still eating her with a fever, an unsatisfied hunger. I nip at the lips of her sexy pussy, before finally letting up.
When her breathing settles, I sit up maneuvering myself to remove my briefs, freeing the beast. Lana lays in front of me, her knees pointed in the air, her sexy little feet on each side of my legs. I pull her ankles and drag her down the bed, before flipping her on all fours.
“Ah!” I admire her sudden state, face down and ass up, just like I like it.
“I missed your body,” I say running my calloused hand against her smooth ass cheek.
“Is that all you missed, baby?” Fuck there she goes calling me baby, that shit drives me insane, in a good way—especially when we’re in the bedroom.
“No, I missed all of you—everything.” I pinch her ass gently, doing my best not to set her off with one of her triggers. I grab the back off her neck pushing her face softly into the bed and without any warning I thrust up into her. Lana screams so fucking loud I’m sure she woke the entire building. Lana and I have never been and will never be fucking quiet. We are two wild animals caught in the carnality of who we are as lovers together.
“You like that, Lana? You like when I fill you up?” Her muffled yes makes me smile in victory. I thrust into her fast, the pull of her core when I’m pulling out almost gets me every single time. I look down at her ass, watching it hit my lower stomach and growl. I love this perky ass.
“Sit up.” Letting go of her neck I wrap my muscular arm around her shoulders and help pull her up, setting the back of her thighs on top of mine. I curse under my breath when my suddenly, not so cute anymore, shirt keeps my chest from touching the skin of her back. I want skin on skin completely. I will make sure she lets me see her completely bare soon. That’s a promise.
Reaching one hand down, I find her clit, flicking it before I move my finger in circles, the tops of my long fingers hitting our connection with every downward motion. Burying my face in her neck I lick up the sweat and let my lips linger on her neck, my tongue barely touching her skin.
Turning her head, Lana nudges my cheek with her chin, making me force myself to leave her neck. Our eyes search each other’s as she uses her strong little legs to ride me, lifting slowly with her knees and thighs, then dropping down fast. It almost hurts, because I so badly want to pound into her like a jackhammer.
Patience motherfucker, patience.
I grab her beautiful face with my free hand, gripping her jaw I slide my thumb across her parted lips. I feel her hot breath seeping through the tiny gap and grunt. I’m so fucking horny, shit I’m getting fucked by my sexy woman and I still feel horny. I’ve never experienced this kind of want before. Ever.
“Lick my thumb, baby. Fucking taste yourself.” I watch in wonderment as her pink tongue stems from between her swollen lips and licks my thumb, moaning in appreciation. I had this thumb on her clit moments ago, I know she tastes how sweet she is. Now she understands my fascination with tasting her.
Straining my neck I bite my lip through a roar. Lana is looking at me with so much desire and adoration while she rides me, squeezing me so fucking tight. It’s too much, this is all too much.
“Fuck baby you feel so good. Say it, Lana. Fucking say it.” She licks my thumb again.
“Say what?”
“Say you fucking love me, baby.” Her eyes widen, suddenly fully aware and alert. I need her to say it, even if it’s not genuine, even if I have to fuck it out of her. I’m so selfish but I have to hear her say it. Taking away her control, I slide out of her, practically crying at the loss of her snug heat. I turn her over and throw her legs over my shoulders before pushing into her hard and fast.
Time to take control, Kingston.
“Tell me you fucking love me.” I thrust in hard, dragging out fast then sliding back in.
“Fuck! Kingston... I... I can’t... I... ugh!”
“Say it, say you fucking love me baby!” I’m determined now, taking hard measured thrusts I give it to her good. Finding her hard nipples through the fabric of her shirt I lean down and bite on her nipple causing her back to leave the bed in the most delicate fucking arch.
She shakes her head back and forth, fighting between giving in and pure desire.
“I love you, Lana James. Now tell me you love me.” I plant myself deep, right against her cervix. Her mouth flies open and her brown eyes hit mine, she looks full with me, teetering on the edge of pleasure and pain. I feel her juices coat me and her walls squeeze me, coming hard.
“I love you Kingston! Ugh!” Her back hits the bed and I come harder, my toes curling like hers and my neck straining while I cry out her name. Collapsing on top of her careful to not hurt her stomach, I hear the faint sound of her sniffling. She’s crying. Fuck me, why did I do that?
Did that just happen? Did I say I loved him out loud while he made love to me? You said you would try Lana James, not just give in and fall at his feet because he makes you feel good in bed. I care for Kingston and I do love him, but loving him in the way it means to truly love is something I need to work on.
“I’m sorry, Lana. I shouldn’t have asked you to say that. I just... I don’t know... shit.” He jolts up and climbs out of bed, leaving the spot next to me empty, filled with coldness. I watch him slide on his briefs and I see our constant battle happening before my eyes. I don’t blame him, I just blurted out I love you, then broke into tears. So badly, do I want to tell Kingston that I love him and I’m ready to receive his love, but I’m not. I’m not ready to be someone’s everything again, I need to work on being my everything first.
“Hey, Kings. Please don’t. It’s okay. Please stay,” I beg desperately. For one night I want to break the cycle, break free from the chains that bind us. He freezes looking up at me, his hair a disheveled mess, he looks shocked. That makes two of us.
“What?”
“I said I would try. Please stay.” Pausing for a brief second, he thinks it over. I don’t want this night to end with us apart again. We both sigh a huge relief. Climbing back into bed with me, he wipes my tears and cuddles me. His warmth feels so damn good right now.
“I do care for you Kings and I love you, but this isn’t just going to change overnight.”
“I know.” Turning him into me, our faces inches from each other, we make eye contact. This is serious and I can’t just let him think that because I love him that I’m not fucking messed up. I’m a basket case, nothing but a girl with tons of baggage.
“It’s not going to be easy. I’m still damaged, Kings,” I choke on my last words.
“Lana what are you so afraid of with me, baby? Let me in.”
I swallow hard, suddenly dying for a glass of water. My fingers find his chest, chasing over the intricate designs, the portrait over his chest makes me smile. It’s of Shayla. He has her portrait, as well as his fathers. He lives for family and that makes me happy, he will be a great father and he doesn’t even know it.
“Lana, tell me,” he demands.
“I’m broken, Kingston. I fear a lot of things. I can still feel the blows, the vile words, the fe
ar of dying at the hands of what I thought was love.” I look up at his face noticing his jaw ticking, grinding his teeth. He looks guilty. I hate that he feels guilty. I know he feels that way because I begged him and everyone else to stay silent with me. He feels responsible for the abuse—talk about a heavy burden. That burden he carries was placed on his shoulders by me and now I need to make him see that it was never him—only me.
“Don’t do that Kingston. Don’t blame yourself.”
“How can I not L? You wouldn’t live with this fear and all the pain if I would have fucking went to the cops or your parents. I was such a fucking coward.”
I don’t think I’m the only one who lives with the scars from that time in my life. They all do, Trey, Shayla, my parents—all of them, but even more so, Kingston. He took it the hardest because I was nearly killed after I told Joel I wanted out. But I was adamant about not calling the cops because Kingston promised me a better life, a better love.
“Kings, look at me.” Lifting his solemn gaze to me, I see painstaking regret. “I’m alive because of you. You saved me that night, I was on the edge of the end, but you saved me.”
“What about the other fucking times L? I should’ve stepped up!” Kingston turns over on his back, rubbing his hands over his face in anger. I climb over him, straddling his stomach, dragging his hands away from his face placing them on mine instead.
“Kingston. I lived every day in fear. I know that you wanted to save me and you did so many times. You were the solid light in that complete darkness. You made me laugh, you made me feel whole again. After every hit, you saved me. He would have ended me if I would have tried to leave and you know that, baby—you do. I was so scared when they locked him up, that he would still get out and hurt me. I still live with that. I’m not saying this is gonna be easy, but we both need to learn to forget the past. I’ll probably test your patience over and over again with my crazy fears and insecurities, but I want to try and learn to love again, learn to let someone into my heart again.”