Inhaling harshly, as if he’d just emerged from that fight, Nik rested his brow to hers, so damn grateful she came out of it whole.
“My beautiful, brave warrior. I saw some of it. Gaia showed me.”
“Is that where you were?” She glanced up at him. “With the ancient goddess?”
“I didn’t know at first, but yes…” He explained what had happened from the moment his soul left his body.
When he was done, tears brimmed her eyes. “So you really can’t die? I mean never?”
Her pain leaked into him, consuming him. Hell, he’d been out of it while he regenerated, held in nothingness, whereas she’d been torn apart, bleeding, and alone. Nik found it hard to swallow, his throat thick with emotions. He nodded.
“If only I’d known, then these passing months wouldn’t have been so hard,” she whispered, looping a swathe of his hair around her fingers.
“I’m so sorry, moró.” He kissed her brow, her jaw. “I was trapped in a healing stasis for a month.”
“It’s been five here,” she whispered. “And sheer hell. You-you broke our mate bond.”
Fuck. He could say sorry repeatedly, but it wouldn’t change anything. “I couldn’t let you die, Shadow, I just couldn’t.” He kissed her damp eyelid, then the other. “I only knew somehow, in some way, I would find my path back to you.” He trailed his mouth down her cheeks. “I’m here now …” He kissed the tip of her nose. “For always,” he said softly.
“Make me warm again, Nik,” she whispered, shutting her eyes. “Everything inside me is so cold. I need to know this is real, not another dream to haunt me…” She slipped her hands under his shirt, stroking her palms over his abs and up his chest.
And her symbionts latched on like leeches psychically, sucking hungrily.
She reared back, eyes widening. “Nik, you-you—”
He blinked then shook his head, a grin starting. “Now I understand why Lady Gaia tossed me out into the alley earlier. It seems the ancient goddess understood more than she let on. It appears I can feed your needs again. No one will be with you this way ever…”
Fuck, a groan escaped him, one full of need for her, made worse as the symbionts drew deeper from him. Shadow was his very heart, and he wanted her warmth—their soul-bond back. Even unaware in the healing cavern, he felt this hole—this emptiness within before Gaia gave him back his memories. And he prayed he hadn’t fucked up their mystical bond by snapping it in the first place.
He brushed back her hair and cupped her face, bringing his mouth to hers and gently kissing her, savoring her. And when she kissed him back, passionate now, as if desperate to believe this wasn’t a dream, his heart ached.
Nik scooped her in his arms and crossed to the bed, setting her down.
As he drew off his shirt, her gaze tracked his every movement. He lowered his hand to his jeans and undid his button. She rose on her knees, brushed his hands away, and slid his zipper down. She reached for him, but he grasped her hands. “No. I might lose my mind if you touch me now, love.”
He fumbled off his sneakers and jeans, then he drew off her t-shirt and underwear, revealing her too-slender form. Remorse fisted his gut. But meeting her bright eyes, seeing the hope there, edged with wariness as if he would suddenly disappear, Nik wanted that fear gone, wanted her to see him. Here. With her. Neither of them living in agony ever again.
He rested his hands at her sides and trailed open-mouthed kisses down her sternum over the symbionts. Gently, he pushed her to the mattress and moved between her parted thighs. Her warm body aligned against his, and he shuddered. Theós, he might have been out of it, regenerating, but that emptiness inside him was because she wasn’t a part of him. Even unaware, he missed her so damn much.
His eyes burning, he kissed her deeply before sliding down her body. He trailed kissed over every inch of her, her breasts, her nipples, sucking and licking. Her hands fluttered over his back. He shifted and dragged his tongue over her tummy, then he sucked on her hip bone.
He pulled her legs over his shoulders, opening her to his gaze. Color flooded her pale cheeks.
Her chest rising and falling, she rested on her elbows, eyes trained on him.
Nik ran his tongue up with long sweeping strokes, between her folds, letting his piercing drag over her clit every time, and she writhed beneath his mouth.
“Nik, please…” she whimpered, grabbing his head, legs moving restlessly over his shoulders.
He slid a finger, then two into her, and as he thrust, he swept his thumb over her clit. She gripped his hair and arched into his mouth. His lips tightened on her swollen nub, and he tugged.
“Oh god, Nik!” she cried out, her body almost coming off the bed, her orgasm crashing through her.
As she lay there panting for air, Nik slid an arm around her waist and moved her further up the bed. He rested on his forearms, keeping his weight off her. “Okay?” he asked.
She gave him a trembling smile. “Yes. Now that you’re here.”
“Me, too, agápi, me, too,” he whispered, trailing his mouth along her jaw, treasuring this moment.
“I need you inside me.” She slipped her hand between their bodies, her slender fingers wrapping around his throbbing cock. His body coiled tighter, and with her thumb stroking the barbell piercing on his throbbing dick. Hell. Teeth clenched, Nik moved her hand and pushed into her, breaching her tightness. She stiffened.
He stilled.
“I’m fine,” she whispered, her eyes pinned on him as if afraid he’d vanish as soon as she shut them. “It’s all so new again.”
“I’m here, my heart, feel me…” Arms braced on the bed, muscles straining, he pushed into her in a slow, deep glide until he bottomed out, feeling her body as it clenched around him. As he retreated, then slid into her again, those shadows in her beautiful eyes lightened.
Unable to hold on, he thrust faster, harder, the sounds of their bodies coming together echoing around them, and she moved with him, her nails digging into his biceps, passion adding a deeper flush to her delicate features.
“Nik…” she whimpered.
“I have you, baby.” He slid his thumb firmly over her clit, rolling her flesh, and tugged. She cried, her body bowing beneath him, squeezing his cock like a vise as her orgasm broke. His own release barreled down his spine like lightning, flashing through him as they came together as one. Nik grunted. Warmth, like a white light, flooded him, spreading into her…reflecting in her eyes as their souls reconnected, their mating bond slipping back into place.
Breathing hard and feeling a whole lot shaky at the intenseness of their souls rejoining, Nik rested his brow against hers. He basked in the intimacy of their mate bond once more, feeling her warm glow deep within him, immensely grateful he hadn’t destroyed their mystical link.
A hand brushed his hair away from his face.
Nik eased back. “I’m too heavy—”
She shook her head, her arms tightening around him, keeping him there. She touched his jaw, eyes bright with unshed tears. “I never got to tell you I love you, too. And I do, so much.”
His heart cramping, he kissed her. “I’m insanely in love with you, agápi mou. Now, forever, for always. Not even death would keep us apart.”
Chapter 37
Shadow’s heart hammered in her chest after their intense coming together. Nik’s warmth settling inside her once more, the hollowness within gone. She pressed her lips to his pecs, so grateful to have him back—
Oh… Her heartbeat picked up more speed, remembering. She had to tell him their ginormous news.
“Nik?”
“Mm-hmm?” He kissed her throat, his mouth gliding down to her breastbone, his hair trailing along her skin like sensual fingers. She grasped his head, stopping him. “There’s something I must tell you.”
“Later. I’ve missed you, and I just want to hold you, to love you again—”
A low whine drifted to them.
Nik lifted his head, his brow creas
ing, his gaze flicking toward the window. “What the hell is that?”
He eased out of her body, rose from the bed, and stalked naked to the window. Damn. Shadow scrambled off the bed. She grabbed her discarded t-shirt, wiped herself, tossed it aside before hurrying after him.
“It’s that freakin’ hellhound!”
“I know.”
“Why haven’t the others dealt with it?” He went motionless, his narrowed stare wheeling to her. “What do you mean, you know?”
“Because after we killed Mammon, he followed me here. He came every night while I was, umm, healing. And I had to nurture my symbionts, so I fed from him. Except for you, his dark energy lasts me longer than that of all the demons. And the succoring calms him…” She bit her lip. He stared at her as if she spoke another language.
“Nik, those amorphous demons from Tartarus sent him to get you back there. Pithius told me,” she quickly added at his thunderous expression. “But you no longer possessed the souls since I’d taken them from you. It’s why he came after me. Except, when I touched him that night in the alley, I calmed the constant rage in him. Despite everything that occurred after, in the end, Pithius saved me…saved our baby.”
Growling, Nik glared down at the hound again, and she saw the precise moment when what she said hit him. He went deathly still. Slowly, he turned to her. “What…what did you say?”
She gave him a trembling smile. “We’re going to have a baby.”
He blinked, going paler than she did when she suffered through her morning sickness.
She quickly slipped her arm around his lean, hard waist. “Sit down.”
Nope, her big, strong warrior did no such thing. He hauled her to him, crushing her with arms like steel manacles. Then he dropped to his knees, resting his cheek on her tummy. He didn’t move for several seconds. When he finally looked up, tears glinted in his eyes. “We’re going to have a babe—” A smile started. “A young,” he whispered, pressing a tender kiss to her belly. “In my millennia’s long existence, I never thought I’d experience anything this powerful and beautiful, except for finding you.”
Her own eyes watered, and she lowered to a crouch. “You’ll make a wonderful father, my love.” She caressed that intractable jaw. “I know, because I feel it.” She touched her chest. “And I see it in the way you love me.”
His throat worked as he swallowed. Nik climbed to his feet, drawing her up with him, He set his intense stare over her as if scanning to see she was all right. Then the verbal deluge broke free.
“Are you okay? You’ve lost weight. That’s not good. You need to eat more. C’mon—” He scooped her up and carried her to the dressing room, gently setting her on the wooden chest as if a wrong move—one puff of air—would cause her untold damage.
A few hours ago, when her world, her future was written in so much pain and barrenness when she’d thought she’d lost him forever, she’d desperately longed for this—his over-protective ways—and so, she let him be himself in this wonderful moment.
It soothed her heart. Because she’d rather have this than ever be without him.
She watched as he hauled out sweats and dragged them on, followed by a gray t-shirt, and sneakers. Frowning, he glanced at her, where she sat naked on the chest.
Shadow arched an eyebrow, but it was wasted on him since he was back digging, in her side of the closet this time. He straightened, holding a flowing, sleeveless turquoise top, then he looked through her clothes again, lifting out a pair of black leggings. “These should be comfortable, right?”
A smile tugged her mouth. “Nik…” She rose, taking the clothes he held. “Our baby is safe and won’t come to any harm with the clothes I wear, promise.”
His eyebrows tipped together, then he nodded. “Okay, but I want you to be comfortable.”
“I am, for now, except for morning sickness—”
“You’re sick?” he demanded. “I’m calling the Oracle—” He pulled open a drawer and grabbed a new cell.
“Nik, stop.” Laughing, Shadow grasped his corded forearm, her heart turning to mush. After the bleakness of the last five months, his love and concern were like finding an oasis. “It’s expected with the changes my body’s going through.” She gently rubbed her sensitive breasts.
Reluctantly, he set his cell down again.
Shadow put on underwear and changed into the clothes he chose as he stood there, hands parked on his lean hips, watching her. She slipped on sandals, then crossed back to him and looped her hands around his waist, just to hold him.
His arms tightened gently around her. His lips brushed her hair.
“What is that?” He eased her aside and crossed to the bureau and the stack of paper lanterns. He picked one up, studying the accordion style.
“It’s a lantern,” she said softly. “I lit one for you every night. You called me Starshine, and I hoped wherever you were, you’d see this and remember me.”
His gaze lifted, and it shocked her to see the stark anguish on his face. “Gaia took away my memories of you because my despair was impeding my regeneration.”
A trembling smile curved her mouth. “I’m just grateful you’re here with me again.”
He dropped the lantern and drew her to him.
She relaxed his embrace. “Do the warriors know you are here?”
He smoothed back her hair from her face. “No. You were the one I wanted to see first.”
“You going to call them?” She couldn’t wait for everyone to find out her miracle.
He frowned. “It’s close to dawn. They’ll be back soon, so yeah.”
“Okay, in the meantime, I’ll go tend to Pithius.”
His eyebrows drew together in concern. “Shadow—”
She put her fingers on his lips. “He helped me in the last months when I couldn’t do anything for myself. I need to do this for him.”
“Dammit.” Nik raked back his long hair in frustration, the silky strands falling back down his gorgeous face. “He’s still a hellhound. They have no loyalties.”
“I don’t know about that. I only know he saved me. He’d been there for me when I needed to feed. And he was a comfort to me when I was falling apart.”
“Hell.” Nik rubbed his jaw, appearing torn. “Okay. Let’s go get this done.”
God, she loved him so damn much. He always put his own concerns aside for her.
Moments later, they stepped out of the elevator and headed for one of the smaller living rooms. Worry rolled through Nik. Shadow was his entire life. Even as his soul departed his body, his only thought had been for her to be safe. But so much had changed in the months he’d been…gone. He never wanted her hurt ever again.
At the outer door, she eased away from his tight hold and patted his chest. “Wait here. I’ll bring him closer.”
His heart in his throat, he watched the woman who was his very heart, his entire world, walk down the few steps to the hellhound the size of a truck. This was the creature who’d torn him apart as punishment when he’d refused to hunt souls during his incarceration in Tartarus. How could he ever tolerate this beast anywhere near his mate?
Hands clenched, he waited at the open door, wariness threading through him, tightening its web. It was the darkest hour before dawn. Shit could still happen.
As Shadow cleared the last step, the hellish creature prowled closer, eyes glowing red. Its enormous head gently batted her arm, and it chuffed as if in greeting.
“Hey,” she said softly in a familiarity that spoke of frequent meetings, and she stroked its muzzle. She put both her palms on its massive chest and rested her brow against its black pelt. Minutes passed.
Nik stopped breathing. How could he, when his mate stood inches from a maw with deadly fangs—fangs he’d been at the mercy of too many times in the past.
Nik? her soft voice coasted through his mind. Come.
He took the steps down.
The hellhound growled low in its throat.
I’m not gonna do any
thing, you damn pain in my ass. Still, Nik treaded carefully. This was one of Tartarus’ most dangerous beasts. A wrong move and he could be torn apart again—because that thing sure seemed to revere his mate.
The hellhound ignored him.
Shadow reached out and grasped his hand. “Pithius,” she said softly, her one palm still attached to its massive chest. “This is my mate, Nik.”
The terrifying creature whined and gently headbutted her shoulder again, like a puppy.
Amazing.
“I guess you’ve been accepted,” she teased, her eyes glowing from her feeding.
Fine, but he would be able to take care of her needs once he got back on patrol.
Nik frowned as the hellhound and Shadow stared at each other for an endless second, then the creature shimmered and faded.
Nik drew her into his arms. “What was that all about?”
“He said to say his name if I ever need him.”
He frowned. “He’s not coming back?”
She stared at the spot the beast had been. “I think he will make an appearance if he needs me enough.”
Who knew with a little kindness, even the most feared monsters from the darkest depths of Tartarus, would react to it? His mate had empathy in bucket loads.
“If he seeks you out, I’m okay with it,” he said. “I can’t hold on to ancient anger when you’ve shown me how to let go and move on.”
“I’m glad…” She headed up and sat on the top step. Nik lowered beside her. “For the first time, I don’t dread the mornings.” She glanced up at the dark sky. “I want to welcome the day.”
He put his arm around her, hugging her close. “I promise, I’ll spend eternity greeting every morning with you, and making it up to you.”
“I know. I need pampering.”
“It would be my pleasure, Starshine.”
Shattered Dawn (Fallen Guardians Book 5) Page 38