“I’m not running. Really. I said I’d go back next week to see Finn. I just need space to … breathe.”
The horses picked their own way through the meadow. For once the vivid display of wildflowers and the playful mountain breeze brought Trinity no pleasure.
“Zane doesn’t trust me,” Trinity said into the silence. The admission felt like it had been torn from her mouth.
“Oh, Trin.” Ivy’s hazel eyes saddened. “I have no doubt Zane trusts you.”
“I told him he could. But he didn’t say he did.”
“You of all people know that Zane is a man of few words.”
“He turned away, Ivy, he didn’t need to use words to let me know how he feels.”
“Rhett can’t believe the change in Zane since you’ve stayed at the ranch. He talks more, laughs more and Rhett says he’s never seen him so happy.”
“But that doesn’t mean he trusts me and there’s no way I can make him do so. If there’s no trust, there can be no love, let alone … us.” Misery underscored her words.
“It’s okay, Trin, to not always be in control. Rhett has shown me that life can’t always be micro-managed. Love is uncontrollable, unpredictable, even irrational, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.” She leaned over to pat Trinity’s knee. “Zane wasn’t just at the top of my list for your Mr. Right, he was the only name on the list. You’re perfect for each other but you are both stubborn. Ever since the bonfire the two of you have been fighting the connection between you. Zane also has been hurt and it could take him a little longer to give in.”
“That’s the thing. Will he ever stop fighting? After everything he has been through can he ever trust again? I’m not sure I could.”
“He will.” Ivy smiled and looked past Trinity. Her eyes sparkled. “And … he has.”
Trinity frowned and swung around in the saddle. She’d been so engrossed in their conversation she had no idea Zane had driven into the meadow. Her hopes soared and then plummeted. Zane’s presence might not mean what Ivy thought it did. Perhaps Finn remained upset? It’d broken her heart to leave him in tears. Perhaps Zane was angry that she’d left so suddenly and hurt his son?
“Talk to him, Trinity,” Ivy said, softy. “He might have needed to breathe too or just time to find his words.”
In silence, they rode toward the pickup. Unsmiling, Zane leaned against the silver truck, arms folded and his head bare. He wore new Wranglers and the turquoise western shirt that made his eyes appear more blue than grey. Her stomach twisted. She couldn’t bear to think about not being at Hollyhock Creek Ranch with him and Finn. Everything, and everyone, she’d ever wanted was there on the high-country ranch. Her sorrow communicated to the chestnut. The horse side-stepped as a butterfly fluttered from a wildflower. Trinity breathed deeply and urged the gelding forward in a straight line.
Ivy leaned over to take Trinity’s reins. “I won’t come any further. If you’re not back in an hour I’ll send a search party.” Her words might have been light but her gaze was serious. “Good luck,” she whispered as Trinity slid from the saddle.
She watched Ivy ride away, leading the chestnut. Then she angled her chin, settled her hat on her head, and headed over to Zane. It didn’t matter how much her heart might break in the next ten minutes, for Finn’s sake she had to put all feelings aside. Whatever relationship existed between her Zane from here on in, it couldn’t cause Finn any worry or stress.
Zane pushed himself away from the truck and strode to meet her. He stopped an arm’s length away. His jaw was clean shaven and she inhaled the faint scent of soap and leather. She’d never seen his grey eyes so still or so intent.
“Hi, Trin.”
His husky voice gave her no clue as to the reason behind his tension or why he had come.
She searched his impassive face. The grooves etched beside his mouth didn’t give her hope he’d come to ask her to return to the ranch.
“Hi. Is Finn okay? I’m sorry he was upset when I left.”
“He’s not okay. But I told him I’d come and tell you you’re welcome to stay whenever you like.” Zane’s voice was so low and so raw, it was as though he spoke from a place inside that he’d never reached before. “And I’m not … okay either.”
She thrust her hands in her jeans pockets to stop herself from clutching his shirt and anchoring herself to his solidity and strength. Her world had never spun more out of control. He might feel something for her but unless trust was part of the equation there could be no future for them. She had to have faith and believe that Ivy spoke the truth when she’d said that Trinity didn’t always need to be in control.
“Me … neither.” Her words were slow and quiet. “But I had to leave. You need time together as a family … a family I don’t belong to, no matter how much I might … want to.”
The tanned skin of his throat rippled as he swallowed. He reached into his shirt pocket and pulled out a handful of small purple and yellow wildflowers. “You are part of our family. Like the wildflowers that belong in the mountains you belong with us.”
She took the flowers without breaking eye contact. The delicate petals shook in her unsteady hand. “I’d like nothing better but … I can’t if you don’t … trust me.”
He stepped forward but didn’t touch her. “You asked me if I trusted you and I was so caught up in my emotions, I couldn’t answer. But I can now.” His eyes darkened. “Trinity, I trust you with my life. I love you with all my heart and I don’t ever want you to think that I don’t. Even if I don’t always have the words to say so.”
Her world stopped spinning. Her hand that held the wildflowers stopped shaking. Zane hadn’t come because he was angry she’d hurt Finn. He’d come because he trusted her. She smiled, her heart soaring as high as the granite peaks around her. He’d come because he loved her.
Hope lightened his eyes to a clear grey and she knew Zane saw all the love and trust she held for him in her smile. She closed the distance between them and laced her fingers behind his neck. “You know, every time you don’t have the words, you’re just going to have to show me another way.”
His lips curved before he kissed her and showed her just how effectively he could communicate without words.
When they broke apart, her fingertips brushed his jaw. “Zane, I love you, more than even I can express with words. You’re my Mr. Right. There’s nowhere else I want to be but with you and Finn.”
He pressed a tender kiss to her forehead before wrapping an arm around her waist. “As much as I’d like to keep showing you exactly how I feel, Finn will be waiting. Let’s go … home.”
She snuck another kiss. “Consider the Hollyhock Creek Ranch curse well and truly broken. I’m staying and nothing will make me leave.”
Zane’s arm tightened around her. His loving smile touched her heart.
She slid a hand into the back pocket of his Wranglers as they walked toward the pickup. In her other hand she held the purple and yellow wildflowers that might be wilted but were as bright as her dreams.
By her big sky cowboy’s side was where she would forever be.
If you enjoyed Her Big Sky Cowboy, you’ll love the other Wildflower Ranch stories!
Wildflower Ranch Series
Book 1: Cherish Me, Cowboy
Book 2: Her Mistletoe Cowboy
Book 3: Her Big Sky Cowboy
About the Author
When not writing Alissa Callen plays traffic controller to four children, three dogs, two horses and one renegade cow who really does believe the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. After a childhood spent chasing sheep on the family farm, she has always been drawn to remote areas and small towns, even when residing overseas. Once a teacher and a counsellor, she remains interested in the life journeys people take. Her books are characteristically heart-warming, emotional and character driven. She currently lives on a small slice of rural Australia.
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Her Big Sky Cowboy Page 13