by Kendall Ryan
She rooted around in her bag and pulled out a red gift bag with crisp blue tissue paper.
“New York Giants’ colors.” I smiled.
“Always.” She handed the bag to me. “Now open up. I think you’ll be able to use them.”
I sifted through the tissue to find a brand new pair of ski gloves and a matching knitted hat, both in blue and red—my team colors.
“I was thinking you’ve had your other set for a long while and you might need something new. The gloves are supposed to be the top of the line and I, uh, knitted the hat.”
“Shut up,” I demanded, staring at the hat in my hands in genuine awe. It even looked like a hat, sort of. And given the fact that Maggie had been attempting to learn to knit since the day we’d met, with a closet full of failures that could have graced even the most horrific Pinterest “nailed it” board to show for it, I knew exactly how meaningful this gift was.
I stood and took her in my arms without a second thought. “This is amazing. Thank you.”
Her arms snaked around my waist easily, filling me with her warmth as she lay her head against my chest.
“No, thank you, Sam. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
She pulled back a little and looked up into my eyes. That same softness from before had returned and my heart ticked faster in my chest, sending blood thrumming to my ears, my wrists, and lower.
“S-Sam?” she murmured, her voice little more than a whisper, and in that moment I knew this was my chance.
Bending low, I cupped her cheek with one hand and brought my mouth close to hers. She didn’t pull away, and taking it as a sign of approval, I pressed my lips to hers.
The kiss was hesitant at first. Searching. A question more than an answer, but as her lashes fluttered closed, I wrapped my arms around her tighter.
And in that moment? It was everything and more. All the fantasies I’d had over the course of all those years sprang to life as she fell apart in my arms, pliable and responsive and sweet. Her tongue swept out to meet mine and I groaned as need pulsed through me.
I pulled her closer, angling my body against hers, reveling in the feel of her soft curves pressed against me. Jesus, she felt just like I knew she would. Like the missing puzzle piece in my life. Like she was meant to be in my arms. Like—
A shrill sound rent the air and, for a second, I thought it was just the blood rushing in my ears. But as it continued, I realized it was a phone.
Maggie’s phone.
I pulled away and she stared up at me, eyes wide, breath coming from us both in gasps.
A second later, the ringing stopped but the damage was done. I’d awakened from what felt like a dream and had been hit in the face with a dose of reality.
All of a sudden, after years of waiting, Maggie wanted to kiss me and I just accepted it. It was like I’d never seen a rom-com before. Never witnessed a rebound in action. But here I was, the big, lovable friend, setting myself up for an audience-groan-worthy fall. And I had no one to blame but myself.
“I’m sorry,” I said, my voice still raspy with unquenched need. “I… I need a minute.”
Shoving my hands in my pocket, I tore from the room just as quickly as my legs would carry me, leaving an open-mouthed Maggie in my wake.
Chapter Nine
Maggie
I shot a glance at the clock and groaned, flopping back onto the bed.
What had happened? I mean, I knew what had happened. Sam had kissed me and then the phone interrupted us, but dang it… Why did he have to leave?
Sick of staring at the door and waiting for it to open, I clicked on the TV and watched the crowd of onlookers in Times Square.
There were exactly twenty minutes left until the ball dropped. The only question now was whether Sam would still be gone when it happened. After all, it had already been almost half an hour since he’d rushed out of here like his ass was on fire.
I guess I couldn’t blame him. It had blindsided me too.
The passion and intensity in that kiss were almost overwhelming.
The words of everyone who’d spoken to me in the past few days flooded through my mind. The woman on the plane, the lady in the shop, even my own best girlfriend. They’d all been able to see something I hadn’t.
And now that it was here, staring me in the face?
I couldn’t figure out how I’d never noticed it before.
The way Sam looked at me, the way he attended to me and kept me safe. The way he made me laugh. Now that we’d kissed? It seemed so obvious that we were two halves of one whole and I had just been too stupid—or too distracted—to notice. Yolanda, Trevor, Dee…probably even Frick and Frack a few rooms down the hall knew it before I did.
But now that I knew? Now that I sat here with the imprint of his warm lips still searing into my skin? I didn’t care about anything else. I just wanted to make up for lost time.
The rest of my worries had been burned into oblivion by the heat between us. I no longer cared how this would affect our friendship, or how I’d wasted eight years when the right man had been in front of me all along. I wanted Sam and the only questions that remained were where he’d gone, when he’d be back, and, most importantly, if he’d kiss me like that again.
Heart thrumming in my chest, I grabbed my phone from the bedside table and stared down at the number of the missed call.
Fucking Trevor, still messing my life up, only long distance now. I thumbed past his name and typed Dee’s number into a message.
Sam kissed me.
I stared at the simple words, my heart leaping like I was sixteen again and kissing was the most wonderful thing I could imagine.
With a deep breath, I sent the message, and then flopped back onto the bed and stared at the ceiling.
Not even a solid ten seconds passed before my phone rang.
Taking it in hand, I pressed the glass screen to my ear and winced as Dee shrieked over the line.
“Oh my god! You two idiots finally figured it out! I knew it, I knew it would happen. Tell me, did you kiss him back?” she shouted with excitement.
“I did,” I said, trying to sound much calmer than I felt.
“And?” Dee asked “How was it?”
“It was...” I couldn’t help it. I actually squealed with delight. “It was incredible. It was so tender but firm and sexy and… I don’t know. It was just so Sam.”
“I’ll bet it was.” I could hear Dee’s smile in her voice. “So the real question is why are you wasting your time calling me? Don’t you have some, you know, business to attend to?”
“That’s the thing, the second after we kissed, he rushed out of here like he was Bruce Wayne and just caught a glimpse of the bat signal blinking in the distance.”
“Cold feet?” Dee said, sounding perplexed.
“I have no earthly idea. That’s why I was calling you,” I countered with a pained laugh. “I think he feels like it was a mistake, maybe.”
It wasn’t until I said the words out loud that I realized how much that thought terrified me. What if that was it? What if it felt wrong to him, despite me knowing nothing had ever felt so right?
“Just, you know, give him a second to process. This is new for both of you. He was probably resigned to you and Trevor and now all of a sudden, you guys are breaching the friendship barrier and making out. He’ll figure it out soon enough. When have you ever known Sam to not do the right thing?”
“And the right thing is...?” I asked.
“Getting back in that ski lodge and not leaving the bed until you’ve created enough heat to melt that dang mountain,” Dee said with a laugh. “Trust me. He’ll be back.”
We said our good-byes, but even after we hung up, I held Dee’s words close to my heart, like a secret wish.
He’ll be back.
I had to hope she was right.
And when he got here?
This time, I’d be ready for him.
Chapter Ten
Sam
/> What the fuck was I doing out here?
Aside from freezing my nuts off, that is.
From the hotel’s rooftop, I stared out at the snowcaps in the distance, my breath a white fog in front of me. I was standing here with my hands shoved in my pockets like an idiot while the girl of my dreams sat in a hotel room a few floors away probably wondering what the hell had just happened.
The sound of laughter broke into my thoughts and I shot a glance down at the crowd of twenty-somethings moving from pub to pub, probably in search of that midnight kiss or a quick lay.
That had been me, once. I’d been one of those guys surfing for quick, easy fun and meaningless sex to fill the time. But now?
It was the last thing on my mind.
The second I’d touched Maggie I knew I wouldn’t be able to stop myself until I had her. The need was all-consuming and it scared the ever-loving shit out of me.
Which, I supposed, was the real reason I’d ended up on the roof.
I’d crossed the line and shown her my true feelings, and whatever happened next was going to affect our relationship for the rest of time. What if this was just a moment of weakness for her? What if we took that next step and then, tomorrow, in the light of day, she was filled with regret?
It would kill me.
This was a terrible idea. The second our mouths touched, I knew it. If I loved her before, the way our bodies fit? The things those lips made me feel and want? It was a whole new level. Which meant, if it went bad, I was going to be in a world of pain. The kind that dragged you down into a deep, dark depression where you knew no one would ever compare.
The wind kicked up and I shuddered, squaring my shoulders against the gust.
What was she thinking down there all alone? She was probably as confused as I was. She’d always been the cautious one, running the numbers, checking the stats. I was the daredevil, and Mags was the angel by my side, making sure I was careful.
It was only then, as I stared out at the sheer wall of ice—a double black diamond—that I’d skied down earlier that it hit me like a load of bricks right in the gut.
What the actual fuck was I doing out here? When had I ever let fear hold me back? I was the guy who didn’t want to miss a thing. A risk-taker. And instead of taking the most important risk of my life, I was here in the cold on New Year’s Eve instead of telling the woman I loved how I felt.
And even better? Based on the way she’d kissed me? I had a real chance of having everything I’d ever wanted.
Maggie, totally mine.
That kiss, hot and sweet as it had been, solidified everything for me. Maggie wasn’t just some girl I’d lusted after. She was my forever. And the longer I stood here, the longer I was giving her time to second guess what I knew to be true—that we belonged together. She was willing to risk it. I’d never forgive myself if I was the one who chickened out.
A man on a mission, I headed back into the warm hotel and rubbed my hands together before punching the down button outside of the elevator. I had no idea what I was going to actually say once I got there—after all, if I hadn’t figured it out in eight years, I certainly wasn’t going to tonight. Whatever came out, came out. Consequences be damned.
The elevator door chimed and I made my way to the room, tugging the room key from my pocket. I swiped and stepped inside, knocking gently as I did so as not to startle her.
It didn’t matter though; she was reclined on the bed but her eyes were locked on the door. Our gazes collided instantly. Her eyes widened as she surveyed me, then she offered me a timid smile.
“You’re back.” she said.
She’d changed from her boxers and T-shirt into the hotel robe and for the life of me, it was all I could do not to cross the room and fling the terry cloth to the floor. But we needed to talk first.
I let out a deep breath. “Look, I want to apologize.”
“You don’t need—”
“I do, though. I’m sorry for the way I acted.”
Maggie looked taken aback for a moment, but then she slowly nodded, her face tinged with a sadness that was like a punch to the gut. “No, no, really, it’s okay. I totally understand. Weird moment. New Year’s and all… It can do that to a person. We can just forget it ever happened and go back to the way things were. It’s okay.”
“Go back to...?” I frowned at her, stomach clenching as each word she’d said was like a nail being hammered into my coffin. It took me a second to realize—or hope, at least—that she’d misunderstood me. “Oh, no, Mags. I’m not sorry for kissing you. I’m sorry I left you here all this time while I thought about it.”
I stepped a little closer to the bed. “The real question is, are you sorry I kissed you?”
She rolled the tip of her tongue over her bottom lip and then shook her head again. “No, I’m not. But, if you don’t regret it, then why did you leave?”
I speared a hand through my hair. “Because you’re not someone I can just fuck once and be okay with it. You’re…everything. And the longer I kissed you, the harder it was going to be to control myself. I don’t want to rush you. You just had a breakup. This…the feelings between us? It’s all new for you.”
“That’s okay, though. We can work through it together. It’s new for both of us,” she corrected, the sadness beginning to lift from her eyes.
I threw back my head and let out a harsh laugh. “Not.”
“What are you saying?” she asked, her brow knitting in confusion.
It was my leaping-out-of-that-plane moment, and I wasn’t going to blow it this time. “I’m saying that I have loved you every second of every day since you first passed me your drawings in Spanish class.”
She laughed at first but then when she saw my solemn expression, the laughter died and the truth dawned in her eyes. “Sam… That was eight years ago.”
“I know exactly how long it’s been.” I took another step toward her and tugged her to her feet, sweeping her into my arms until her breasts were pressed tight against my chest. “I know exactly how many nights I spent with you in separate beds. I know exactly how many mornings I woke up without you by my side. And, what I’m saying, Mags, is that I’m done waiting.”
Burying one hand in her hair, I leaned down and planted a soft kiss on her lips, loving the feel of her tongue as it swept out and begged me for more.
I shook my head. “I can’t make love to you tonight until I know where you stand.”
She searched my gaze. “I’m in shock, to be honest.” She chewed her bottom lip and I could feel her body trembling against mine. “Knowing that you’re…that you… All this time? And I never knew. Plus, things just ended with Trevor. How could I have been so blind? What if I fuck this up?”
This was the Mags I knew. Cautious Maggie. Careful Maggie. But if ever I needed her to trust me, it was now.
“He wasn’t right for you.” I gestured between us and ran my thumb over her bottom lip. “This is right.”
“I think I know that,” she murmured. “At least, I know it feels so natural. So obvious. I guess I’m just scared.”
“Of what?”
“Me. And you. These feelings.” She shook her head. “There are so many things that I admire...that I love about you. Your talent and your sense of adventure and the way you look after me. You’re a better man than I deserve.”
“Nobody on earth is good enough for you.” I kissed her again, this time allowing her to swirl her tongue with mine so I could taste the sweet champagne on her breath. And as soon as we fell into each other’s arms?
There was no way we were stopping this time. Slowly, she guided me back toward the bed and, as her knees buckled against the mattress, I asked her again. Once more for good measure.
“What do you want, Maggie?”
“You, Sam. Always you.”
Chapter Eleven
Maggie
I kept waiting for it to be awkward. For one of us to laugh uncomfortably or for my fingers to shake as I moved to untie the k
not that held my robe together. Instead, though, everything felt...perfect.
Like this was a moment we’d been building to for years now, a rhythm we’d already learned.
With Sam’s dark blue eyes on me, I felt safe and admired and sexy in a way no man had ever made me feel. And, as he dropped to his knees in front of me, my breath caught and I knew that this was what I wanted, what I craved more than anything else in the world. To be with him. Totally and completely with him.
He pushed my fumbling fingers aside, taking the belt of my robe in his sure grip and loosening the knot with focused precision. Before he slid the white terry cloth from my shoulders, he pulled his own shirt from over his head, treating me once again to the view of his perfectly sculpted chest.
“You’re incredible.” The words slipped from my lips and he glanced up at me again, a soft smile on his full mouth.
“Not half as incredible as you. Come here.”
Heart pounding in my throat, I nodded and his calloused fingers brushed the space between my breasts, pushing my robe aside until it was a puddle on the bed and I was laid bare to him. The chill of the hotel room did nothing to cool the fire in my cheeks, but as Sam stared at me, I took another deep breath and readied myself for him.
“God, you’re even more gorgeous than I imagined.” His fingertips brushed my collarbone, the curve of my breasts, my stiffened nipples, and the plane of my stomach like he was studying a fine work of art. I shivered with need, the warmth of his skin searing against my body and making me beg for more.
But I knew, like so much of the rest of our relationship, this would take time. That this was only the beginning.
Sam stood again. “Don’t move. I just want to look at you,” he whispered.
I swallowed hard, the heat of his gaze giving me courage. “All of me?” I asked, lying naked before him.