by K. M. Raya
"You guys are fucking idiots. You think I was there to what . . . ask him to wear my friendship bracelet?" she laughs again bitterly.
The movement causes her split lip to open slightly and a few drops of blood to drip out.
We stare at her in silence.
"Oh my god, you people are so blind—running around this town like children fighting in a sandbox. If you'd just take a fucking second to . . . oh, I dont know—ask me, maybe? I could have told you why I was there. I could have just told you everything, but now I'm not sure I even want to."
Her eyes flick to Carter accusingly.
“I tried to tell you last night, but you wouldn’t hear me out. You assholes want so badly to believe I’m here to betray you . . .”
Her words are slightly muffled but I can practically taste the hysterical fury there. She knows something we don't. I can see it in her eyes.
"What the hell are you talking about?" Holden spits, becoming more irritated by the second.
A brief flash of something strange in Carter's eyes makes me frown, but he wipes it away a second later.
She laughs, but the movement causes her arm to jerk, making her laugh turn to a sharp whimper.
I hate the way the four of us take a step closer to her, almost as if we can't help it. I catch myself though, refraining from reaching out to loosen those knots.
She's got me all tied up inside and I don't know how much more of this I can stomach.
"If you only knew the truth . . . you'd know I’m not your enemy. Cassini’s not your enemy either, I can promise you that right now—" she trails off breathlessly.
My blood boils and a part of me feels like slapping her, but I won't. Stalking forward, I put my face close to hers, enough that I’m smothering her without touching her skin.
She shrinks back like she’s afraid of me and a part of my soul dies a little.
"He killed my mother in cold blood. Not my enemy? He's my only enemy!" I seethe through clenched teeth.
"Did he though?" she asks, cocking her head to the side—the dark strands of her blood streaked hair covering her face.
"What do you know?"
My hands are shaking and I know Captain is on my heels behind me, ready to grab me if I take this too far.
"Think about it, Ellis—really think about it." Her eyes burn into mine. "Why would Alexi murder the woman he's loved since childhood?"
Her words settle into me like acid.
I know the rumors about my mom and Alexi. I’ve always chosen to believe they were nasty lies but a part of me always watched him. He’d been like an uncle to me for sixteen years.
"Liar!" I bark, not believing a word of it.
"Fucking lies!"
Turning on my heel, I slam my fist into the wall, not damaging the tile a single bit, but I could swear I felt a crack in my knuckle.
"It’s true, Ellis,” she whispers. “Alexi loved Charlotte since they were kids . . . until she was forced to marry Cole.” I turn to face her, my face a mask of pain and her eyes soften ever so slightly, letting me see the truth of her words for myself.
There’s no way she should have known about that. Nobody knows about the arranged marriages.
“I know you don't want to believe it, but my source is reliable."
All eyes are on her, needing to know the truth.
"Beth’s aunt Grace told me everything . . . about the arranged marriage, the affair—" Her eyes flit away and I can see she's holding something back, something she really doesn't want to tell me.
"Now is not the time to hold anything back, Angel. Tell me what you know!"
Tears fill her eyes, but sincerity shines through. Whatever she's about to say is going to wreck my world.
She blinks at me, taking a stuttered breath in.
"You're not Cole's son."
The room is utterly silent.
I feel like I can't breathe. It’s like all the air has been sucked from this small room.
I want to call her a liar. I want to scream and rage at her—to get to her to admit she's playing with me. I want all of these things but the truth sinks into me. Something in my soul knows she's right.
A sob rips from her mouth and everything about it is genuine.
"I'm so fucking sorry El," she whispers—the nickname rolling off her tongue and causing my chest to constrict. "I wanted to find a better way to tell you, but you gave me no choice! You're Alexis son, Ellis. And he's always known that—so has John, Giles and Jack. They've always known it but Cole knows he can't lose his only heir. All of them helped cover it up."
"What the fuck is happening . . ." Holden mutters, wide eyes bouncing back and forth between Angel and myself.
All the guys watch us, stunned and unable to digest this life changing revelation.
Her eyes haven't left mine though.
"Do you understand what I'm trying to tell you right now? Think about it, Ellis . . . who would have the most to gain from Charlotte's death? Who has a secret best kept hidden?"
It all clicks into place . . .
Chapter Twenty-Four
Angel
Waves crash against my ankles as I wade out into the swell of an oncoming storm.
The frigid air bites at my skin, but it's the balm I needed to soothe the aches plaguing both my body and my soul. It's been a week since the Brothers released me from Ellis’ tourture room. A week since any one of them have attempted to reach out. I hadn’t really expected them to.
Beth has called no less than thirty times since I got back to my house, but I’ve ignored them all, only sending her a quick text claiming I had the flu.
I stare out over the horizon, lost in thought and wishing I could disappear beneath the waves. I’m so tired . . . and so goddamn cold. Papa’s words ring in my ears still, even as the water crashes around me. He’d called last night, going on and on about my future and how it was high time I stepped up to the plate. I’ll be nineteen just after midnight tonight—legally eligible in the eyes of the mob and suddenly useful to Papa. He’d been short with me, but I could hear the excitement in his voice. He wouldn’t let on exactly why he was so chipper, but it made me feel like I'd just swallowed a brick.
Sloshing water behind me makes me jerk around—startled as I meet Holden’s brown eyes, filled to the brim with worry.
“What are you doing out here?!” he shouts over the roaring of the ocean and the crash of thunder in the distance.
I don’t answer him, but turn back around and take a step forward. A hand on my arm stops my progress, but the grip is gentle and almost hesitant.
“We need to get back to shore, Angel! This is dangerous!” He runs his hand up my arm and latches on tight, as if he might lose me to the rolling waves.
I laugh, but it's bitter sounding.
“What do you want from me, Holden? What else can I possibly give you? Just let me go,” I plead with him, turning around until our faces are inches apart.
He has bags under his eyes—looking like he hasn’t slept in days. Behind him, I see another figure approaching. Ellis wades through the shallows, his grey eyes are trained on Holden and I. His jaw is clenched against the chill of the water, but he still makes his way to me.
“We made a mistake!” Holden grits out, refusing to look away from my eyes. “Angel, we need to talk about this, just come back with me.” he pulls on my arm and I just stare at him.
It probably looks bad on his end—watching me here, waist deep in the sea during a storm. He probably thinks I've snapped. That I’m ready to give up, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. I’m not about to walk into the waves and let them take me, I just needed a little clarity for once.
Ellis has reached us now, standing on my other side like he's ready to drag me back to the sand himself. His chest is heaving and his lips are a bit blue, but those grey eyes are trained on me.
“I thought I’d left it behind . . .” I tell them, my voice is barely over a whisper but I know they can hear me. “I thoug
ht he was finally going to let me go, but I was so stupid!”
Glancing between the two of them as the wind whips my hair around my face, I want nothing more than to fall into a strong pair of arms and let them make all the bad go away.
“Get her somewhere warm, I’ll meet you both at her place—” Ellis tells Holden before turning away and heading back to shore. I watch him go, but soon I feel Holden’s rough hands sliding up my arms, pulling my attention back to him.
“At least come to the car with me so I can pump the heater, your lips are turning blue,” he pleads with me.
Casting one last glance out to sea, I reluctantly nod my head and let him lead me back to the beach and up to the parking lot where a black Mercedes sits alone. There's nobody around at this time on a stormy evening. If I’d been caught up in a riptide, I’d have been a goner.
He stuffs me in the passenger seat and it's only when he turns that heat on that I feel the chill settle into my bones. My limbs start shaking and soon, I can’t hold in the sobs. He doesn’t hold me though. It’s not what I need right this second. He must sense this because all he does is wait patiently while I ugly cry.
It’s not a pretty sight, but I didn’t come here to be pretty. I came here to figure my life out.
After a tense minute, I settle back into his plush seats and let the heat envelope me.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers, breaking me out of my mental daze.
Looking over at him, I meet his chocolate eyes and see nothing but sincerity there.
“Why do you guys have your heart set on me being a traitor?” I ask honestly.
It seems like ever since I arrived in this stupid town, they’ve been purposefully trying to catch me out.
He looks away and down at his hands for a second and I think he won't answer, but he does.
“I can’t tell you that—because I don’t fucking know.” he grumbles.
He looks angry with himself.
“I’ve never met anyone like you, Angel—none of us have and I think we just don’t know what to . . . do with you. We’ve been in control for so long and then you come along—”
He seems unsure of what he just said, but I do sort of understand.
“I’m not here to hurt you, Holden. Yeah, I went to see Fin . . . but it was all for you guys. I know it’s not my place, but I couldn't let this shit go on any longer. You guys are going to kill each other over a goddamn lie!”
I’m starting to get angry all over again.
He sits there silently, watching my every move. It makes me nervous when he does this. Holden has the ability to make me feel like I’m under a microscope.
“I don’t know what to do anymore. Everything's just so fucked up. Ellis is a mess right now and can’t even go home because he might kill Cole right then and there—” His chest rises and falls heavily.
“I’m so sorry, little bird,” he whispers and my stomach flutters at the nickname. This time though—with warmth rather than a sneer.
Reaching out, I stroke his forearm with my finger, watching as small chills break out over his skin. Knowing the way his body reacts to mine is making me feel sort of giddy.
I shouldn’t feel this way, not after what they let happen.
But I can’t help myself.
I want him.
‘Does that make me an idiot?’
Looking at Holden now, it’s hard to fault myself for the giddy schoolgirl feelings swirling around inside my gut. Each one of the Brothers makes me feel an entirely different way. Carter makes my whole body hum with excitement, Cap makes me feel desired, needed and beautiful. Holden infuriates me mostly . . . but he also drives me to want to be better. It helps that he looks like sex on a stick with all that lush dark hair and sexy brooding eyes. Ellis has also worked his way into my cold heart, though I’ll never be the first to admit it.
"You're thinking pretty hard over there, little bird—care to share with the class?" Holden asks as he reaches a hand out and smooths away the small pucker between my furrowed eyebrows.
Unbuckling my seatbelt, I watch his pupils dilate considerably, though it’s hard to catch given that his eyes already resemble the night sky.
Instead of responding, I let my body do the talking.
I lunge for him and it seems he’d been expecting it because he reaches out and pulls me into his muscular arms, up and over the center console I go until I’m sitting in his lap. Our lips crash together and his fingers grip my black hair tightly in his closed fist.
His teeth graze my bottom lip and I girate myself against him causing a hot, tingling sensation to fill my lower stomach. His jeans rub against my swollen clit as I rock on his lap. His hands drift from my hair, down my neck and the side of body until they cup my ass and thrust me tightly against him.
He’s as hard as steel beneath those jeans and I can’t help but grind harder. Holden moans in my ear—spurring me on. Sitting back slightly, I unbutton his pants, meanwhile Holden pulls my shirt and bra over my head and tosses them into the back seat. I’m in shorts so it’s relatively easy to get them off.
Before I know it, I’m naked, sitting in his lap with his cock between my thighs—rigid and pulsing.
I capture his soft lips with mine and rise up on my knees before sinking down onto him. He feels so good inside me—long, thick and warm. Up and down I bounce and he meets me thrust for thrust. The car windows are fogging over and our breaths mingle in the small space.
I’m glad for the privacy behind the wall of rainfall this storm created around us because I know we aren’t being quiet. I moan, pant and whine—our skin slapping together as he fucks me . . . or, as I fuck him.
Leaning backwards, I bring my feet to the sides of his thighs, never losing contact and bracing myself on the steering wheel behind me, giving him room to move. With a burst of energy, Holden begins to thrust upwards even faster. He pumps into me from below as I hold myself steady.
Raising my eyes to the roof of the small car, I can't help the scream that rips from my throat as my eyes roll back in my head. Wave after wave of pleasure flows through my body, making it difficult to keep upright.
With one final, almost animalistic groan, he empties himself inside of me before we both come crashing down in a pile of sweat and passion.
✽✽✽
Pulling up to my house, I see an unfamiliar car in the driveway.
I figure it's Ellis, but I don’t see anyone in it. Looking to Holden in question, he smiles sheepishly.
“We might have made a copy of your house key . . .” he admits.
Smacking him in the arm I grumble, “Damn it, Holden, so that’s how you got me.”
“Hey, this one wasn’t my idea okay? You can thank Ellis when you see him.”
The house is quiet and all the lights are still off, so we head up to my bedroom. I’m unsurprised to find Ellis, stretched out across my bed reading a book I had sitting open on my nightstand.
He barely glances up when we enter.
“I’m going to grab a quick shower, I’ll be right back,” I tell them as I head to my bathroom, grabbing my black robe on my way.
I don’t wait for a response before closing the door and turning the shower on until steam fills the room.
I scrub my skin and my hair, making sure to clean off all the salt that’s dried onto my skin. A part of me doesn’t want to wash the smell of Holden away, but knowing he waits for me in my bedroom right now makes me feel better.
I can’t explain why I suddenly feel so dependent on their presence in my life. Each one of those guys has put me through things that normal girls would have run screaming from.
I can’t help it though.
I crave all four of them.
Once I feel clean and wash the jasmine soap from my reddened skin, I turn the water off and step out. I take my time in the bathroom and make sure to slather myself with my favorite jasmine scented lotion before brushing my hair out.
Slipping on my silky robe, I open the bathroom doo
r and let the steam roll out ahead of me.
Holden is nowhere to be seen, but Ellis hasn’t moved—only this time he’s put down the book and is watching me with heated grey eyes.
“I was worried you’d drowned in there,” he teases, making me grin a little before heading over to my usual side of the bed.
I settle in, making myself comfortable.
“What are you doing here, Ellis?” I ask him bluntly.
I don’t understand why they’re hovering around me all of the sudden.
“I’m worried about you—after everything happened I was afraid we hurt you.”
I frown at him.
“You did hurt me. Over and over again, you all hurt me. I’m not some naïve little girl,” I assure him. “I know it looked bad on your end, but I can’t forget what happened to me—what you let happen.”
He just nods solemnly.
“What about you though, hearing all that had to be rough. I hate that you had to find out like that.”
He casts his eyes to his hands as he fidgets with the rings on his fingers.
“I’m dealing with it. I think a part of me always suspected—at least a little bit. I’ve never been anything like him, no matter how much he tried to force it.”
I reach out a hand and smooth my finger over the exposed skin of his arm. I shouldn’t be comforting him right now but I can’t seem to stop.
“So what happens now?”
He heaves in a breath and huffs it back out unsteadily.
“I haven’t figured that part out yet. I haven’t even been home.”
I nod; Holden told me earlier that Ellis was screwed up pretty badly.
He stares at me for a few long moments, eyes tracing over my face.
“I’m so fucking sorry, Angel.” he chokes out.
I’ve never heard him sound so defeated.
“I know you are—and I understand, sort of.” I lace my fingers through his.
And I do know he’s being honest with me, I can see the torment in his eyes. I saw it back in that room too. As hard as he tries to act, I saw the apprehension as he watched me dangle from that rope. I saw it in all of them and I know in my heart they didn’t enjoy any of it.