“Well, you’re from another planet,” I said. “Of course you’re not going to get everything right here.”
“Of course not,” agreed Linnsy. “Look at Tim. He’s lived here all his life without managing to develop social skills.”
At first I was offended by this comment. Then I realized that this was the way Linnsy usually talked to me when we were actually getting along, so maybe it meant she had forgiven me for my outburst in her apartment. (Of course, that didn’t mean I had forgiven her yet. But that was another matter.)
McNally usually stays out of the kid stuff, unless we ask him for help. So I was surprised when he walked over to us and said gruffly, “Look, why don’t you guys leave this one to me? I think I can handle it without making it seem like you’re suddenly taking pity on her.”
“How?” asked Pleskit.
McNally smiled. “The McNally has his ways, Pleskit. The McNally has his ways.”
“Your bodyguard is a very strange being,” said Maktel, once he, Pleskit, and I were alone.
“Strange, but cool,” I said.
“I would think everyone is cool when the weather is like this,” said Maktel, sticking out his hand to catch a snowflake. Then he laughed. “Oh, you mean that other kind of cool you Earthlings are always going on about.”
“Yeah, that kind,” I said. “McNally definitely has it.” I didn’t add that McNally is pretty much my hero. But I was dying to know how he planned to solve the Weintraub problem.
A moment later Ms. Weintraub called for us to come in. So I didn’t have time to figure out if Maktel and I were still fighting or not.
CHAPTER 15 [LINNSY]
PRE-PARTY PARTY
Wednesday afternoon my mother shouted into my room, “Call for you, Linnsy!”
I sighed and put down my copy of The Hobbit. When I came out into the hall, Mom whispered excitedly, “It’s the alien boy! The one from your class.”
I rolled my eyes. “For Pete’s sake, Mom, he’s got a name. It’s ‘Pleskit.’ ”
“Yes, dear,” she said sweetly, holding out the phone.
I sighed. My mother has this ability to turn into a stone wall when I try to correct her behavior.
“Hey, Pleskit,” I said, taking the phone into the closet. “ ’What’s up?”
“ ‘Up’? It’s a preposition, indicating that something is in a skyward direction.”
I sighed again. Sometimes it’s hard to remember that, as brilliant as he is, Pleskit still doesn’t have a complete grip on Earthly slang.
“No,” I said patiently. “I mean…” I paused. What did “what’s up?” mean, actually? “Uh, I just meant, ‘What’s happening?’ You know, what’s going on?”
Pleskit made a small sound of distress. “I know that,” he said. “I was just making an attempt at humor. A failed attempt, I see. Anyway, I was calling to ask if you could help us with the party preparations. We are not entirely familiar with Earthly conventions for this sort of affair and could use some assistance.”
“I’d be glad to! When do you want me to come over?”
“We’re planning a pre-party party for Thursday night. I am also inviting Tim, in the hope that he and Maktel can settle some of their differences.”
“What’s the deal with them, anyway? Tim isn’t a social wizard, but he can get along with anyone, except Jordan, of course. And if Maktel is your friend, he’s got to be basically okay.”
“I do not know,” said Pleskit mournfully. “It’s hard for me to understand how two people that I like so much can so dislike each other.”
“I know what you mean,” I said, thinking of Tim and Jordan—though I was a little startled to realize how much I really did like Tim.
“I should also tell you that the Fatherly One has suggested I ask Misty to come help.”
“Misty! Why on Earth would you want to ask her after all the trouble she caused over the Veeblax last month?”
“In truth, that’s the primary reason for inviting her,” said Pleskit. “Please remember, the Fatherly One is a diplomat above all.”
I stopped to think about that for a second. “Got it,” I said. “It’s not such a bad idea in terms of the party, either. Misty can be a pain in the butt, but she’s really good at this kind of stuff.”
* * *
Thursday afternoon Pleskit sent the embassy limo to pick up Misty and me at our houses, which was pretty cool.
Things were a little awkward when we first got to the embassy, since Pleskit and Misty were still kind of wary of each other. It didn’t help that Pleskit had the Veeblax on his shoulder when he greeted us. I just about had to peel Misty off the ceiling when she saw the thing. But then she calmed down and started playing with the Veeblax—which was actually all she had wanted to begin with—and pretty soon things were going along smoothly.
“Here,” said Pleskit, passing the Veeblax to Misty. “You can hold it while I fetch the decorating materials.”
Misty looked nervous but happy.
Tim came in a few minutes later, wearing that pouch with the oog-slama in it. He seemed startled to see Misty holding the Veeblax, but didn’t say anything.
“Here we go!” called Pleskit. He and Maktel were coming down the corridor, each pulling a string attached to a floating pad that was piled high with what I assumed was stuff for the party. “This may be trickier than we thought,” said Misty, looking at the piles. I nodded. I couldn’t tell what any of it was.
“One of the main decorating devices for a Hevi-Hevian party is smell,” said Pleskit, coming to a stop in front of us. He turned around and took a silvery tub off the floating cart. “This is an odor pot,” he said, handing it to me. The tub fit comfortably into the palm of my hand. “We place them in strategic locations around the room.”
“Uh, I dunno, Pleskit,” said Misty as he handed her one of the tubs. “I’m not sure the kids will go for this.” She looked at the little pot. “How do you turn this on, anyway?”
As she spoke, she twisted the top. Immediately a wave of odor flowed out.
“What a rapturous smell!” cried Pleskit.
Maktel started dancing in a dreamy kind of way.
Aliens. What are you gonna do?
“Smells like sardines to me,” said Tim.
I nodded, pinching my nose as I did. I realized we had to talk Pleskit out of using the odor pots.
On the other hand, I loved the little light pots he brought out next. They were holographic projectors, and above them would be a vivid three-dimensional image—an image that kept shifting as time passed. Some of them shifted rapidly, some so slowly you couldn’t see it as you watched, and would only notice it if you looked away and then turned back. The images were mostly from Hevi-Hevi—famous. (according to Pleskit) buildings, strange and wonderful animals, and some beautiful plants. There were also some space scenes.
While we were working, Shhh-foop kept sliding in, singing worriedly about her food ideas.
She continued bringing in trays of food, most of which was truly weird, partly because a lot of it just wouldn’t sit still.
“You can use the purple ones,” said Misty decisively. “But the green things that keep whining have got to go.”
I decided it was a good thing Misty and I were there. If it had just been the boys, they might well have let Shhh-foop spend the next day cooking a pile of goodies that would have driven the class into a mass barfing episode.
As soon as we finished discussing the snacks with Shhh-foop, we got into a big debate with Ms. Buttsman about what games would be appropriate. I don’t know when the last time that woman saw a real kid was. I’m pretty sure she was never one herself. She wanted us to do the most baby things, like Pin the Tail on the Donkey.
Misty, on the other hand, wanted to play kissing games.
“Eeeuw!” cried Tim. “That’s disgusting!”
“Not to mention forbidden,” said Maktel.
I was glad, since this saved me from telling Misty I thought the id
ea was disgusting too—though when I thought about Jordan, I almost changed my mind. But I beat that thought down.
“We don’t need games to have a good time,” said Tim. “We all know each other. We can just hang out. The main thing is that people are going to want to see the embassy. Plus, Pleskit can bring out his stuff, which is so cool it will keep everyone busy for most of the night.”
It was about the most sensible thing I had ever heard him say.
Later on he came over to me and said, “So, how do you think McNally is planning to solve the Weintraub problem?”
“I don’t know,” I said, deciding that, for the moment at least, I was speaking to him. “And I’m dying to find out.”
Overall it was a really fun evening—except for one extremely weird moment that occurred when Ellico vec Bur came in to see how we were doing. Though Tim had told me about the Trader(s), it took me a minute to get used to them. Even so, I thought they were pretty cool. But when Tim said, “Hey, is there any chance we could get a tour of your spaceship?” the look that crossed Ellico’s face was frightening. It vanished almost immediately, replaced by a slick smile. “We’re sorry,” said the Bur part in its scratchy voice, “but that will not be possible.”
They left the room almost immediately afterward.
Despite this, I thought the party was going to be fun and exciting.
As things turned out, it was more exciting than I could have imagined.
Not to mention life-threatening. Well, not just life-threatening. Considering the way everything worked out for me personally, I should probably say “life-changing.”
CHAPTER 16 [MAKTEL]
SNOOPING
The decorating party was so stimulating that I had a hard time falling asleep, partly because of the excitement, partly because I had eaten too many finnikle-pokta, and partly because I was still disturbed by the tensions I felt with Tim.
To make things worse, Pleskit had invited his Earthling friend to spend the night with us, which had infuriated me. What could he have been thinking of?
At least I didn’t have to share a bedroom with him.
But the most frustrating thing of all was the fact that I still had not been able to find a moment alone with Meenom to deliver the Motherly One’s secret message. And now he had sent word that he would not be back until the night of the party.
I wondered how much it bothered Pleskit that his Fatherly One was away from the embassy so much. I think Pleskit must get really lonely for him sometimes.
While I was tossing and turning on my air mattress, tormented by thoughts of the Motherly One and home, of messages undelivered and Trader(s) not worth trusting, I heard a sound in the hall.
I was off the mattress immediately. Moving cautiously, I went to my door and opened a tiny viewport so I could look out.
Ellico vec Bur were walking down the hall, not moving with their usual confident stride but going slowly, stealthily, as if trying not to be heard.
Clearly this was something that needed to be investigated. No time to wake Pleskit or the loathsome Tim. I slipped into my robe, quickly turning off its lighting devices. Then I moved silently into the hall, where I pressed myself to the wall.
Following the Trader(s) was difficult because I had to stay far enough behind that they would not see me, yet remain close enough that I would not lose them—which meant staying just behind the curve of the corridor.
When they entered a tube and went up to another level of the embassy, I was afraid I had lost them. But the transporter returned to my level, and I was able to use the repeat button to get off at the same level the Trader(s) had.
But which direction to go now? The embassy’s main corridor is a circle, of course, but there are spokes that run off it. And I certainly didn’t want to start around the circle in the opposite direction from the Trader(s) and suddenly come face-to-face with them!
I enacted an old Hevi-Hevian choice ritual, performed by tweaking your sphen-gnut-ksher three times, then counting a rhyme off on your fingers.
Choice made, I headed to my right. At the second intersecting corridor I noticed a slight glow coming from one of the doors halfway to the outer window.
Again pressing myself to the wall, I inched silently down the hallway. As I drew closer to the open doorway, I dropped to the floor. Crawling forward, I peered around the frame. (I learned in Wilderness Way that you are less likely to be seen this way.)
It was a comm-room. Ellico vec Bur were sitting at one of the transmitters, lit by the purple-blue glow of its screen.
“The situation is reaching crisis point,” they said, speaking in Standard Galactic, which I had not heard since my arrival on Earth.
A longish pause followed while the Trader(s) waited for an answer. I could not hear it, because they had locked themselves into a secure connection. But the timing told me they were most likely speaking to someone in fairly close range, probably not more than a few million miles away.
“Of course,” snapped Ellico vec Bur suddenly, in response to whatever answer had come in. “Now listen, if things develop as we fear they might, we’ll need to make a speedy departure.”
Pause to listen.
“Yes, yes, of course we’ve thought of that.” Pause. “No, of course Meenom’s not aware of what’s at stake.” Pause. “For now just continue to monitor the situation.” Pause. “Right, right. Contact you tomorrow.”
As they severed the connection, I slid back from the door and scrambled to my feet, hoping I could get down the hall and around the corner before they left the room.
I could not. Terror clutched my clinkus as I heard the Trader(s) enter the corridor. I wanted to run, but forced myself to hold still. Running away would not only be undignified; it would make me look even guiltier than I already did.
Besides, it would have been pointless, since the Trader(s) had already seen me. So I simply waved and made the salty-sweet smell of drowsiness. “You two couldn’t sleep either, huh?” I said, trying to sound casual and friendly.
I could see from the look on Ellico vec Bur’s faces that my ruse was not successful. Rather than say anything, the Ellico portion raised an eyebrow and half closed its other eye. His symbiote just glared at me with its tiny, beady eyes.
The implied skepticism pushed me into babble mode. “I think it was all those Earthlings we had here tonight,” I said quickly. “I’m not used to that, you know. I tried and tried to sleep. Really! But I finally gave up and decided to go for a little walk.”
“How odd,” said Ellico vec Bur tartly. “We thought your Motherly One frequently gave parties that were attended by beings from all over the galaxy. We assumed you were more sophisticated than that, Maktel—sophisticated enough, in fact, to realize it can be unwise to listen to private conversations.”
“I wasn’t listening!” I cried, trying to keep my fear out of my voice.
The Ellico part of the Trader(s) raised its eyebrow again, needing no words at all to tell me how unbelievable they found this pronouncement. Then they swept past me, cape swirling and all four eyes blazing with anger.
I waited until they were out of sight, then bolted for the tube.
CHAPTER 17 [PLESKIT]
SUSPICIONS
“Pleskit. Pleskit, wake up!”
I blinked my eyes open. Maktel was standing next to my air mattress, dressed in his robe and looking upset.
The Veeblax, which had been sleeping beside me, eeped with alarm and transformed itself into the shape of a stone, something it does when it is frightened or startled.
“What do you want?” I asked groggily. “And what time is it?”
“I have no idea what time it is,” said Maktel impatiently. “But Ellico vec Bur are up to something. I spied on them. They were sending a message. I didn’t like the sound of it.”
“What are you talking about?” I asked, struggling to pull myself to full wakefulness.
“Ellico vec Bur are up to something,” he repeated, sounding as if he thought I
was being stupid. “They just made a secure call out of the embassy.”
“How do you know that?”
“Because I followed them!”
“Well, you’re acting at least as suspicious as they are,” I said. “What kind of peevlik follows people around in the middle of the night?”
“The kind who can’t sleep and has reason to be suspicious,” replied Maktel virtuously. “I’m sure those Trader(s) are traitors. You should have seen how angry they looked when they realized I’d been following them.”
I waggled my sphen-gnut-ksher. “Of course they were angry! Wouldn’t you be angry if someone was spying on you?”
“Of course! But that would be because I’m innocent!”
I laughed. “Then doesn’t the fact that Ellico vec Bur got angry indicate that they’re innocent too?”
Maktel looked furious. “All right, listen to this, Pleskit smarty-orklit. Before I left for Earth, my Motherly One gave me a message to bring to your Fatherly One. She said it was urgent, but she also said that it was important that I pass it to him in private. But Ellico vec Bur have managed to block every opportunity I have had to be alone with your Fatherly One. Don’t you think that’s suspicious?”
“It’s just a coincidence,” I said. But I don’t think I sounded very convincing—mostly because all of a sudden I wasn’t all that convinced myself. “Why didn’t you tell me about this message?” I asked, feeling a little hurt.
“It was supposed to be a secret,” said Maktel. He sounded more impatient than ever, which only made me more resistant to what he was saying.
Maktel noticed my hesitation. Farting decisively, he said, “All right, I’ll show you. Where’s your download box?”
I looked at him in surprise. Though we Hevi-Hevians can download a sensory memory from our sphen-gnut-ksher and then play it back so that we can re-experience it, it is very unusual to share a memory, since so many private thoughts and feelings will be attached to even the mildest events.
Too Many Aliens Page 6