by Alice Wilde
I can barely contain my excitement as we enter the village in search of lodgings and goods, but it isn’t long before I realize the Vikings live differently from many of the places I’ve read about or seen so far. There are no taverns or inns to be found. Instead, Ero asks around to see if any of the villagers are willing to open their doors to us for the night. While no one has been outright unfriendly to us, the looks we are given are far from welcoming, and I’m starting to think we won’t find anyone willing to help when a woman approaches us.
She says something to Ero that I cannot understand. He nods and they talk for a while longer before she smiles at him and walks away.
“What was that about?” asks Roan.
“That was our new host,” Ero says. “Her name is Astrid. She’d heard that we were in need of a place to stay for the night and has offered us her roof.”
“Oh, thank the gods,” I exhale in relief.
“We’ll most likely have to offer her a trade,” says Ero. “Generally, it would be some form of manual labor or perhaps entertainment of some kind.”
“Fine by me,” Roan says. “It’ll be worth it for a good rest and hot meal.”
“I can’t guarantee that you’ll get either, but at least it’ll be a place indoors to rest.”
“Why’d she walk away?” Li asks.
“She said she had some preparations to make, but that we should see the jarl and she’d meet us there a bit later.”
Ero leads us through the village until we come across a building that’s larger and sitting slightly above the rest.
“This should be it,” Ero says.
“Should we go inside?” I ask.
“I doubt it would hurt to let the jarl know we’re here,” Li says. “Whether or not this is a trading village, I’d want to know when an odd group of travelers appeared in my town.”
As we approach the entrance, the door swings open and a group of men exit. They’re tall, almost as tall as my men, and very heavily built. They eye us warily, and then one of them speaks. Again, I cannot understand a word he says, but Ero is quick to respond. I can’t help but feel this new group of men watching me, and I quickly cross my arms over my chest. If only there had been a fresh set of clothing somewhere on our ship.
A man with a long silver beard says something in a powerfully deep voice, and even Ero pauses for a moment before answering. I’m fascinated by the language they speak. I’ve learned several languages fluently, and parts of many other languages, but this is completely new to me. I doubt we ever had a Viking enter our courts. It’s hard to describe other than to say it sounds like a broken mix of nearly every other language I’ve heard from my kingdom’s surrounding countries. It pitches and weaves and crashes against you in unexpected ways, leaving me completely baffled when trying to understand the meaning behind each word.
We’re finally led into the hall of the jarl’s home, and the group of men follows us. As we get nearer to the far end of the hall, I can make out the jarl’s chair, which is empty. The men who have led us into the hall don’t move, and we remain standing, waiting for the jarl to join us.
I take this chance to look around the room. The decorations are far more rustic than any I’ve seen in a Great Hall before, but they are not unpleasant or uncomfortable. It’s far darker inside than I would prefer, but that may be in part due to the colder temperatures here than in my own warmer climate.
A door swings open at the side of the room and a man strides in. His hair is pulled back into a braid, which nearly touches his waist, but not in an unkempt way. He’s quite tall and imposing, wearing fine clothes and furs. He’s followed by an attractive woman, who is equally well-dressed, and a number of men and woman with bowed heads that I can only guess are servants.
The man takes his place in one of the ornate chairs before even glancing our way. The man who brought us into the hall steps forward and says something, gesturing toward us. Ero bows in response, and the rest of us follow suit. The tones sound harsh and angry among them as they speak, but then the jarl laughs and shakes his head.
“You, girl, tell me why are you here?” The jarl asks me in a language I can mostly understand, although his use of the tongue is a little broken.
“We’re on our way to visit Ero’s family,” I say. “We just hope to have a place to stay for the night, and perhaps a hot meal.”
The jarl looks around at each of us in turn, thoughtfully pulling at his beard.
“An odd bunch, aren’t you? Hmm. You may stay the night, but I expect you to leave by morning and to offer your host fair trade for her generosity.”
“Thank you.”
“Wait for her to come retrieve you over there,” the jarl says, gesturing toward a long table off to the side of the room.
The four of us take a seat, but we don’t have to wait long before Astrid arrives and motions for us to follow her. We take leave of the jarl and quickly make our way out of the hall and to Astrid’s home. It’s on the edge of town and quite small, but tidy. She’s just showing us where she’s prepared several places for us to rest made of straw and blankets when a young girl of perhaps nine or ten runs up and tugs at her skirts.
The child is stunningly beautiful, with silvery blonde hair and eyes almost as blue as Ero’s. I can’t help but think she even looks a little like him. The woman says something to the girl, who looks at us nervously before running back outside.
Ero says something I can’t understand to Astrid, who gives him an uncomfortable look before replying.
I look on in shock as Ero takes her roughly by the arm and pulls her close to him, his jaw tight and his face angry. She struggles against his grasp.
“Ero!”
Ero turns to look at me and immediately releases the woman, who slaps him and points toward the door.
I don’t have to know the language to understand what the next words out of her mouth mean as I quickly remove myself from her house along with Roan and Li, but Ero doesn’t follow. We can all hear them shouting at each other until Ero finally storms out to join us.
“What was that about?” Roan asks.
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Do we at least have a place to stay?”
“What do you think?” Ero growls as he pushes Roan aside and walks out of the village and into the surrounding forest.
“Should we wait here or follow him?” I ask anxiously.
Li looks around, and I notice the argument has drawn several of the other townspeople out of their homes and gardens to watch.
“I think we’d better go after him,” Li says. “None of us can speak their language, and I’m not interested in getting into any trouble with these people.”
We smile at the frowning faces around us and slowly make our way out of the town in the direction Ero left.
It doesn’t take us long to track Ero. The trail he’s made through the forest is distinct and easy to follow. We hear him before we even see him, the cracking of branches and harsh, fierce-sounding words not far off.
“Ero,” I call as soon as I think he might actually hear us.
The forest goes silent as soon as I speak, and I hold my breath as I wait for a response.
“I’m here,” Ero says.
We follow the sound to a small clearing, a clearing that was probably not there before Ero arrived. Small trees have been yanked out of the grown and tossed aside, branches and leaves litter the forest floor, and more than a few of the larger trees have marks where Ero undoubtedly hit them.
“What happened?” Li asks, choosing to ignore what Ero has done to the forest.
“I thought it was pretty obvious,” Ero says.
“Is this about the little girl?” I ask.
Ero’s nostrils flare as he turns to look at me. “Yes.”
“She’s yours, isn’t she?” I ask hesitantly.
“If what Astrid says is true, then yes. She’s mine.”
We all stare at him in disbelieving shock, not that it was a
t all impossible, but more so that it was actually true.
“So, what are you going to do about it?” Roan asks.
Ero pulls at his hair and spins to punch a nearby tree, breaking off a large chunk of the bark in the process and bloodying is hand.
“Damn it. I don’t know.”
“Are you sure what she says is true?” I ask.
“Quite certain,” Ero says. “I didn’t recognize her at first, but then she said something to me at her house that most people shouldn’t know.”
“Then you can’t leave her or your child alone,” I say quietly.
“She doesn’t want me,” Ero says. “I’m no husband, and I’m certainly no father.”
“Perhaps not, but you don’t seem to have much of a choice now, do you?”
Ero looks at me curiously.
“We always have a choice,” he says. “It just might not be the right choice in most people’s eyes. Besides, I can’t stay. I have nothing to offer and everything to lose if I do.”
“What do you have to lose by staying?” Roan asks, his voice stony.
“You need me to help gather a Viking army,” Ero says, changing the subject. “How are you going to do that if none of you even speak the same language as they do? The jarl may know how to speak a bit of another language, but that’s not a common thing the further north you go.”
“Of course, we still need you,” I say, hoping I sound reassuring. “But we can also find a way to make this right. Do you really want your daughter growing up without a father?”
“She’d be better off for it.”
“You don’t know that,” I say. “Besides, I think you could make a great father.”
Ero scoffs.
“Really, Ero,” I say. “I know you think you’re incapable of letting anyone in, but I think it’s because you’re afraid to hurt anyone else.”
“Lass, you might be pushing it,” Roan whispers.
“You don’t know me well enough then,” Ero growls. “It’s not that I’m incapable. It’s that I don’t believe in…”
“In what?”
Ero looks over his shoulder at me and then out into the forest.
“I don’t believe in the bond between two people. It’s just the gods’ way of making fools of us all, of blinding us together so that we try to make reason out of chaos.”
I wish he could hear himself.
“So, you can’t believe in a bond between two people, but you can believe in gods you’ve never seen?”
The tension in the clearing almost becomes palpable at my words, and I see Ero’s hand clench into a fist, his shoulders tight.
“I’m not saying the gods aren’t real,” I say hastily. “Only that if you can accept their existence, then how much more so should you be able to accept that which can be seen by your own eyes?”
“And how do you know I’ve never seen any of the gods?” Ero says, still facing away from us.
“Have you?”
Ero turns slowly back to us. “I have.”
My mouth falls open at his words, and even Roan and Li look taken aback.
“You’re joking, right?” Roan says.
Ero glares at him.
“Why would I joke about my gods? You’ve seen Fae, or at least you say you have, so why not gods?”
I honestly can’t tell if Ero is telling the truth or just saying things out of spite. His words make sense, though. A few weeks ago, I would have laughed at the idea of Fae, but I’ve seen them with my own eyes. If Ero is right and his gods are real, what does that mean about my own?
“I’ll prove it to you.”
“What? How are you going to prove it?” Roan asks with a nervous laugh.
“You’ll see,” Ero says before walking off into the forest.
Roan, Li, and I share a look of incredulity, but follow after him.
Twelve
Ero
I hadn’t recognized her. How much of an idiot am I? The moment she spoke to me, there had been a nagging at the back of my mind, but I’d pushed it aside. The years hadn’t been kind to her. Rough winters and lack of proper nourishment had left her gaunt and tired, her hair thin, noticeable even in plaits.
I hadn’t loved her then, and I don’t love her now. She’d been a passing fancy, a moment of pleasure in a whirlwind of hate and fury. One of many women, and I hadn’t stayed long enough to see the damage I’d done. I never had and never would. It was better that way. Once my need for physical touch was met, I left and didn’t look back. It was easier that way, or so I had thought.
I’d been able to go years without feeling, satiating my own primal needs without the burden of having to care. Without the fear of loss…until now. Somehow, I’d actually made things worse.
A child. I’d never expected to have children, and even if I did, I didn’t expect to have any connection with them. But as soon as I realized who Astrid was, and saw that child…
I’m sure she’s mine. And even though I know it’s impossible for me to be a father to her, I can’t help but wish I was a better man. I wish I knew how to help.
Thirteen
Annalise
We travel through the night and most of the following day. Ero shifted almost immediately after heading off into the forest, and I only just managed to notice his clothes lying on the ground as his leopard form darted off into the trees. I collected his clothes, along with Li’s and Roan’s as they shifted as well. Tying their clothes into several bundles, I tossed them over Roan’s back and pulled myself up after them.
I wish we would travel like this all the time. It is much faster, and nestled in their soft fur, it is surprisingly comfortable.
Even in their leopard forms, Roan and Li have a hard time keeping up with Ero, who barely stops to drink from passing streams long enough for us to catch our breath and me to switch between riding Roan and Li. As strong as they are, I can tell Roan and Li are barely holding it together by the end of the second day. Their bodies are hot and sweaty, and they are having a harder time navigating the forest.
Even with magic coursing through their veins, I am beginning to worry they’ll die of exhaustion, and there is no way to get Ero to stop. His mind has been made up, and he isn’t going to stop until he’s accomplished what he’s set out to do, whatever that is. I’m beginning to think all is lost when we leap out of a particularly dense part of the forest and nearly collide with Ero, standing naked in his human form, looking out over a ledge and down on a large Viking village far below.
I collapse off of Li’s back onto the ground, the rhythm of his stride still on me. It’s a few minutes before I can move enough to lift myself from the ground. I ache in ways I hadn’t expected, the soreness finally settling in with the stillness.
“Ero,” I say hoarsely. “Please tell me we’ve arrived wherever we’re going.”
“Yes.”
I sigh in relief and lie back on the earth.
Roan pulls me into his arms, but the action is stiff and tired. Li is helping Ero put his shirt on, but Ero is still looking out over the town, his expression distant. I doubt he even realizes Li has dressed him.
Li sits down beside us as we wait in silence for Ero to let us know what he’s going to do next. We’re all more than a little grateful for the respite, although I am worried about Ero’s current state of mind.
I wake, startled to find I’d drifted off. Roan is still holding me, but he’s dozed off as well, still sitting up. Li is lying on the grass next to us, quietly snoring. I’d never noticed him snoring before.
Carefully removing myself from Roan’s arms so as not to wake him, I stand and immediately regret it. I can barely move, the stiffness in my muscles excruciating.
“Ero?” I whisper as loudly as I dare, squinting as I slowly search the moonlit ledge. “Where are you?”
There’s no response, and my heart beats faster in my chest. He’s left, continuing on without us.
I’m about to wake Roan and Li when I see a sudden, bright light dow
n in the village. Making my way toward the edge of the steep ledge, I peer down at it. A fire. A pyre has been built in the center of the town, and a large crowd is gathering around it.
“Ero,” I gasp as I recognize him even at this distance. He’s surrounded by other large men, and the people seem to be jeering.
I step forward to get a better view and realize too late that I’ve stepped too close to the edge. Before I can catch myself, I tumble head-first down the incline. Dirt, stones, and branches fly past me as I try to grab onto something, anything.
I can feel my skin tearing as everything I grab is ripped from my hands, the speed of my fall increasing with every passing moment. I’m certain I’m about to die, or at the very least break every bone in my body when I suddenly find myself falling through air. I open my eyes just as I plunge into a large body of water.
For a moment all I want to do is let myself sink below the surface, the physical pain of the past few days and my recent fall temporarily eased. Shaking the thought, I kick hard, forcing myself to resurface and breathe, but the weight of my dress drags me down just as fast and I’m soon struggling to keep my head above water.
Taking in as large a breath as I can, I let myself sink while tearing at the dress that’s slowly killing me. All that remains between me and survival is one single knotted lace. I can see the world growing ever darker around me when the knot suddenly slips. The dress loosens around me and sinks quickly into the darkness below. Using what little remaining strength I have, I swim toward the shimmering moonlight.
I gasp, sweet air rushing in to fill my lungs as I tread water. Glancing around, I see the shore and what looks like the edge of the town and swim toward it, every muscle aching. I have to remember to check for any serious wounds once I reach the shore, but first, I have to get there.
I can see the shoreline growing slowly closer, and I’m thankful for the days I escaped the castle and swam in the small pools, although right now I wish I’d done it more often. There’s a pain in my chest from the exertion and I can feel myself slowing down when I hear a shout from somewhere in the town. I can’t quite tell what it is other than it sounds as though it is in pain.