by Paula Quinn
“And ye shall get it,” Elias promised. He reached for his dagger as Bertram reached for his sword with his right arm, Elias noted, and his small blade flew and struck the oaf between his right arm and his shoulder. The pain was intense enough for Bertram to writhe and drop his sword. Enough time for Elias to march forward, yank his dagger free, and hold the bloody tip to Bertram’ hairy throat. “Call off yer men or I will cut yer throat.”
“Halt and retreat!” Bertram shouted at the mounted men beginning to come forward from the forest.
Elias heard Estrid and Agnes crying. The men retreated.
“If I see ye again,” Elias promised on a low warning growl, “my aim will be fer yer heart and then yer head. Open yer mouth and I will cut oot yer tongue. Nod yer head if ye understand.”
Bertram nodded. His body shook with anger at his humiliation.
“Now go.” Elias wanted to kick him all the way out of Sevenoaks. If the bastard hesitated, he would.
There was no hesitation when Bertram Chisholm ran away. He ran for his life and to tend to his arm. He would likely return and Elias would have to kill him. He would prefer not to do it in front of innocent women and an old man.
He turned around to look behind him and make certain everyone was unharmed. Agnes and Estrid wept in Richard’s arms. Simon was shaking his head at him. But it was Lily who smiled at him as if he were the answer to her prayers, at least the ones she used to pray before she was married.
“You have our thanks, Elias,” she said in her siren’s voice.
“Aye.” Richard broke free of Estrid and Agnes and went to him. When he grew closer, he leaned in to speak quietly by Elias’ ear. “She could have used you two years ago.”
Elias felt ill with guilt. Guilt he deserved. “Thank God she had ye, Richard,” he whispered back.
The apothecary nodded and clapped Elias on the shoulder then turned to gather his wife.
Chapter Five
It was a busy morning after they ate. Osbert called a meeting outside the shop, where Richard was asked to confirm the story they had heard about Bertram’s return and expulsion thanks to Elias the Lion Heart. (Estrid left nothing out of the telling.) The villagers gathered around Lily’s guest and filled his ears with questions. He answered each with patience and kind words, looking at home with so many people gathered around him.
Lily turned her gaze away from him and tried to pay attention to her work. She thought about going to him last night. She had heard him from her bed and got up to peek around the curtain between their rooms. He was sitting up in bed, looking around, calling out.
She’d hurried to him and nearly lost her strength when she looked into his eyes. He was terrified, seeing things she couldn’t see, hearing things she couldn’t hear. She’d tried to soothe him. He’d looked at her with wide, glassy eyes. Had he seen her? He’d risen from the bed and paced the room, haunted, so very haunted by demons. Brother Simon had awoken and tried talking to him, but Elias had kept his eyes on her, as if he didn’t hear his friend, or see Richard when her husband rose from bed.
Brother Simon had told her nothing this morning. He and Elias were friends. She respected his loyalty and hadn’t asked.
“He is extraordinarily handsome,” Agnes whispered, coming toward her with a furtive smile. “And quite brave.”
“Aye.” Lily didn’t realize she’d spoken out loud until Richard looked up at her from his work and smiled at her.
“Do you know if he is looking for a wife?” Agnes asked, smoothing her skirts, and then her long, golden locks. Agnes was six-yer-old Annabelle’s mother. She’d had her daughter a bit later in her life, at the age of twenty-six. The child’s father was a smith named Heath in a nearby village. He’d left her soon after she began growing fat with his child.
“The topic has not arisen,” Lily told her calmly, though her heart skipped every other beat. Elias and Agnes? It made her belly knot. She had no right.
Agnes finally left, after trying to strike up a conversation with Elias and not having any luck. They were able to get back to work and do whatever Richard needed.
They had let hopelessness fill them last eve but no more. They needed to keep pressing forward, jar every concoction and mark what it was.
Thankfully, Elias and Simon could read and write. Richard could also but she had never learned. She didn’t mind it. She knew the purpose for every herb, every root, every thing that grew. Her father had taught her some things and Richard had taught her the rest.
She hated seeing Richard so helpless today against Bertram. It broke her heart to think of anyone hurting such a frail old man. She was afraid of the savage but she was tired of his crushing dominance. She wasn’t his anymore.
She’d been foolish to anger him with Richard in his hands though. Bertram was dangerous and capable of anything.
But then Elias stepped in and stopped him…
Lily’s hands shook, making the clay mortar and pestle scape instead of smash.
She tried not to think of Elias but it seemed the more she tried, the more he filled her head. He’d stepped in and, with one fluid movement, sent his dagger into Bertram’s shoulder. He saved Richard’s life and then he thoroughly humiliated Bertram by rendering him helpless! Oh! She’d wanted to jump with joy at the time. She wanted to start leaping now.
No. She had to gain control over herself. She imagined her body was in shock from seeing Bertram Chisholm again. She seethed with fury. How dare he come back into her life and threaten her husband! A part of her wished Elias had killed him. She confessed to Father Benedict when he came for the meeting. But she didn’t feel any better. She guessed it was the other sin of lusting after a man who was not her husband that she needed to confess to. She couldn’t tell Father Benedict. She sighed. Perhaps she would confess to Brother Simon. He had special privileges with God, didn’t he?
Lily was so busy, she almost forgot to feed her husband and their two guests their supper. She hurried out the door and headed toward the house. When she walked past Elias, he put down the armful of hyssop he had gathered and cast a questioning look to Richard.
“My dear,” her husband called out.
“Aye,” she answered.
“Bring Elias with you, please.”
“Pardon, Richard?” she and Elias both asked.
Her husband stopped what he was doing and looked up. “Bring Elias with you. Bertram could be roaming around here—”
“Bertram canna hurt her with his injured arm,” Elias countered with a worried expression.
“No, but his companions could,” Richard argued. “Lily needs protection, lad. There is no one else here who can protect her from Bertram but you. And now that I think of it, she should learn how to protect herself for when you leave.”
Elias avoided everyone’s gaze. When was he leaving? Now Richard wanted him to teach her how to fight? That would take time.
“Will you do it, Elias?” Richard asked. “For Lily.”
Lily hated to admit it, but Richard was correct. She did need protection against Bertram and his cronies and she was beginning to take offense to Elias’ refusal to help her.
She folded her arms across her chest and stared at him until he looked at her. “Are you coming?”
“Aye,” he relented and went to her.
They walked together toward the road with Elias looking back once at Simon.
“Why do you hate me?” she finally asked him.
He looked up from his boots. “I dinna hate ye.”
“You dislike me then.”
“Nae,” he bit out, avoiding her gaze once again.
“Then what is it?” she pressed. She hated herself for caring what a stranger thought of her. But he’d saved Richard. He’d saved her. “You smile and offer your arm to Agnes but you do not wish to be anywhere near me. You barely even look at me. You often hide behind your lashes and –”
She hadn’t meant to mention his lashes. Why couldn’t she have just bitten off her tongue ins
tead? But it was the truth! He’d barely looked at her and when he did—she blinked and stopped thinking as her heart hit a high, massive, impenetrable wall.
He fancied her! Was it true? Could it be true? She wanted to ask him. Why? What would he do if it was? He’d have to leave Sevenoaks. Oh, she thought learning of the plague was the single most catastrophic moment in her life. She was wrong. He had to leave, and she didn’t want him to go.
“Lily, I…” he began, pulling her up from the depths. “I know my place, and I will keep it. Yer husband is my friend.”
She wanted to tell him he had to go, but she agreed with him instead. “Aye,” she agreed on a slightly shaky breath.
He’d just confirmed her suspicions. He liked her, but Richard was his friend and he knew his place. He wasn’t leaving. She was so glad. So glad. And at the same time, it would be difficult living with him for however long he remained.
A mist washed across her eyes and then was gone.
She had never kissed a man—not with passion. Stop it! she admonished herself.
“Lass,” he said in his deep, smooth voice. “Would ye prefer I leave?”
What would her reply mean? What should she say? “You should leave. Aye. But Richard needs you and Simon here.”
She hoped it was enough for him to stay but she didn’t want to encourage him to do what was wrong. “You are both a great help to him and, with that help, we will find something to fight this Black Death.”
“Aye,” he agreed quietly. They walked a little more and then he turned to her. “Ye are verra brave to stand up to Bertram.”
She smiled and shook her head. “Foolish.”
“Nae, lass,” he insisted with a slight curve of his lips. “Confident.”
She blushed a bonny shade of pink. “I have been told I am foolish.”
“I have been told I am reckless.”
She slanted her gaze at him and then laughed with him.
They walked to the house with Lily smiling all the way. They stopped to greet Eleanor and her husband, Walter, the butcher. Eleanor and Walter had been at the meeting and invited Elias to their home for supper one night before he left.
For saving Richard, Walter promised him a thick, juicy cut of his finest beef, and Eleanor vowed to make him her delicious fig tarts.
“They like you, Lion Heart,” Lily said on a quiet voice as she and Elias finally reached the shop. She didn’t want things to be awkward between them. He wasn’t leaving. The Black Death might be on its way here. If she were going to die, she would prefer her last days not to be miserable.
“They love Richard,” he answered, knowing it was true.
She smiled at him as they stepped inside. “Aye, they do love Richard. As do I.”
“I’m glad he is a good husband to ye, Lily. What he did fer ye was valiant.”
Her smile remained. When they entered the kitchen, she bid him to sit at the table while she heated up the leftover stew over the fire. “You seem to be familiar with knightly, more courtly ways,” she asked. “Did you learn about them in France?”
“Nae. I learned them from my Uncle Torin,” he told her with a little light flickering behind his eyes. “He knows the stories of Arthur Pendragon and Avalon, and all sorts of other romantic tales.”
“Do you know any of them?”
He nodded when she looked over her shoulder at him. “I know many of them.”
“My father used to tell me stories of knights. Perhaps you will tell them to me sometime.”
He nodded again and looked a bit muddleheaded. She felt the same way and looked away…still smiling.
“I could teach ye to defend yerself.”
“Oh?”
“Aye. Ye dinna even need to know how to swing a blade. There are places on a man’s body where cuttin’ the muscles renders yer opponent almost completely helpless.”
“Like where you threw the knife at Bertram?” she asked, her interest piqued. She knew of one place on a man’s body to cause him injury, but that was all she knew.
Elias asked her to stand up so he could show her the most vulnerable places on any body.
“Try to aim between the limb and the body. Cuttin’ these muscles and vessels and whatever connects it all together will stop yer enemy instantly. Sometimes, ‘twill even kill him. Cut here.” He walked around her and bent down to touch his finger to the back of her ankle. “Yer opponent will go down and likely never stand on his legs again.”
Elias continued his explanations. “Here is where my knife landed in Bertram. Instantly, the use of his arm was lost.” From behind her, he held up her arm and poked his finger in the socket between her shoulder and her chest.
She giggled and stepped forward.
“We can practice some strikes later,” he suggested, smiling at her.
“Aye,” she said softly, smiling and liking how his hands felt near her.
Someone knocked on the front door, startling them both. It was Brother Simon.
“Did Richard send ye?” Elias asked him as they sat upon stools at the table.
“No, he did not send me. He does not know I came here. I have reason to believe he would be angry with me if he knew, for he wants the two of you to be alone.”
Lily laughed, but she felt a little ill. “Why on earth would you say such a thing?”
“Because, lass, he told me so.”
She felt her face drain of color and then fill with blood and make her blush. She felt a bit lightheaded from the change. “I do not understand. Why would my husband want me to be alone with another man?”
The brother shrugged his scrawny shoulders. “He wants you to be happy.”
“I am happy!” she shouted then stormed out the door.
How dare Richard suggest that she was not happy! Had she not done everything to please him? To be a good, caring, loyal wife? Why did he think she was not happy? Because of sexual relations? She didn’t care about that. Had she not told him so these two years? How dare he make such a decision without her! This was her life!
She’d lost her right to make her own decisions from birth and being born a girl. But Bertram had stripped her of every right. In the seven years she lived with him, there were days when she prayed to die. She wasn’t allowed to interact with anyone. No friends, no fellowship, no comfort. His men were just as bad. They weren’t allowed to touch her and their fear of Bertram sealed their obedience. But they harassed her. They spit on her. They were allowed to slap her and pull her hair while she served them in Bertram’s company, so they did. It made her wise and not meek. She knew when to stand up to them, even Bertram, and she knew when to keep her mouth shut. There was no place for pride. Just the most frustrating, deep-rooted instinct to survive.
But Richard had changed her life. He gave it back to her and now he thought to just hand her over to the first young stallion that came along?
She reached the shop and pushed open the door.
Her husband looked up from his work and smiled. “Ah, dear, where is Eli? I have work—”
“Aye, I know all about your work, Richard. What do you mean by wanting Elias and me to be alone? What are you hoping will come of this?”
“My dear, child—”
“Do not call me a child!” she cried.
“You are one to me,” he said. “You have been a wonderful companion—”
“Richard.” She went to him. “Why are you speaking this way? Have I displeased you in some way?”
His eyes filled with tears as he reached out to touch her cheek. “Lily, you could never displease me, but death is coming, my joy.” He nodded. “’Tis coming. I want to free you from your obligation to me while there is time for you to enjoy your life.”
“’Tis no obligation, Richard. I love you.”
“And I love you. But I cannot give you what you deserve. A life of passion and desire. I wish I was forty years younger, but I am not. I—”
“Richard, I do not need passion and desire. I am happy the way things are
.”
He shook his head. “’Tis not natural. You are young and vibrant. Who knows how long your life will last. You deserve passion and, hell, Lily, if Elias MacPherson is not the most handsome man I have ever clapped eyes on in my sixty-eight years, I do not know who is. More importantly, he’s a good, hard-working man. He likes you. Spend more time with him.”
“No.”
“Enjoy your time with him. Let him kiss—”
“No!”
“Lily, our marriage is not consummated. We are not bound to it by God and it can be easily annulled by the church while I live.”
“Absolutely not, Richard,” she insisted vehemently, “and I will not hear another word from you about this. This is my life you are tossing around. You always told me to stand up for my decisions. Well, this is one of them. I will not abandon you for some silly physical desire. I only need you. So no more talk of this, aye?”
He looked as if he wanted to say more, but didn’t. He smiled, nodded and kissed her on the forehead.
Lily remembered her stew and ran for the door. She pulled it open and ran straight into the wall of Elias’ chest. She was grateful that Brother Simon was carrying the stew, but it left Elias’ arms free to close around her. She looked up into his stormy blue eyes, became startlingly aware of his rock-hard curves and angles, and doubted everything she had just told her husband.
Chapter Six
Elias chopped wood behind the house early the next morning. He felt well rested having almost a full night’s sleep without any terrors two nights in a row now.
Simon worked close by drawing water from the well.
He thought for certain that his friend was out here to speak to him about Lily, but it was Bertram whom Simon wanted to discuss.
“You know I do not approve of you rushing in the way you did, lad.”
“‘Twas the best way to gain control, old friend,” Elias told him as he brought down his axe into the thick log. “I went to him because he couldna hurt me. I cut his muscles as my father and my uncles taught us. Bertram was helpless.” He yanked his axe free and reached for another log. “I showed him mercy and gave him a warnin’. If he returns, I will kill him.”