Paulina reached her hand back through the spiky glass, picked up a rack of earrings and flung it.
‘Stop that.’ Tabby grabbed her arm. ‘Look at you. I’m not cleaning you up.’
Paulina laughed. ‘You’ve got blood on your hands. And it’s not just mine.’
‘What do you want?’ Tabby’s chin trembled. ‘As far as I’m concerned, we’re more than even. You’re still alive. You’ve made a mess of my life. If you want money, I’ll give you money … but that’s more than you deserve.’
‘I don’t want your money.’ Paulina walked around the counter, plucked Car’s photo from the wall. ‘When was this taken? He’s less fat. Still an ugly bastard, but.’
‘You’re going to break that too?’
‘Yeah, alright.’ Paulina chucked it across the shop. ‘Since you offered.’
‘Feel better?’
‘No.’
‘Go home to your mum. Go on. If you’re going to act like a child, you’d be better off home with your mum. I’m not your mum.’
‘I know you’re not my mum! My mum’s beautiful.’
‘Go home to her, then.’
‘Not till you say!’
‘I can’t tell you what you want to hear; it simply isn’t true.’
‘He raped her.’
‘That never happened.’
‘He did. I saw the pictures. He took pictures of her.’
‘You have no proof.’
‘The proof’s all over your face!’ Paulina peered at Tabby’s tight mouth, flaming cheeks. ‘Why’re you still lying for him? Did you even love her?’
‘Of course I loved her!’ Tabby rubbed her face, smearing it with blood. ‘I loved that girl more than life itself. She was a wild thing, but I loved her.’
‘You’re insane.’
‘She threw herself at Car. I still loved her. I forgave her.’
‘I saw those pictures. She was a kid.’
‘She was a Fairfolk girl. Our girls mature faster.’
‘She was scared shitless.’
‘She was a pretty girl. She knew it. She wouldn’t leave him alone. I don’t blame her … she never had a father till Car. I forgive her.’
‘That’s the story you’re telling yourself?’
‘It’s the only story.’
A group of tourists stopped at the shop window, squinted at the ‘CLOSED’ sign, then at Paulina and Tabby. ‘I can’t tell you what you want to hear,’ Tabby repeated. ‘And I don’t know why you think I owe you anything. You owe me your life. He’s dead. My daughter’s dead. I’m just trying to make the best of what I’ve got left.’
‘What, a jewellery shop he paid for?’
‘Yes. My business. My home. My health. My good name.’
‘Your name’s shit!’
‘I’m proud of my name. I’ll defend it to the grave.’ Tabby raised her chin. ‘So will a lot of people around here. Can you say the same for yourself?’
‘Who cares!’
‘You know what people think, when they hear the name “Novak”? They think you’re mainie trash. You’re a drunk. You’re a slut who can’t be trusted.’
‘Better than “King”.’
‘Maybe on the mainland. But you won’t find anyone around here, saying that. Go back to the mainland, why don’t you. Go home to your mum.’
‘Nah, bitch! This’s my home, too. I’ve got blood here!’
Paulina stalked toward the shopfront, smeared her bloody arm across the window.
‘See? That’s Novak blood. I’m here to stay. Don’t ever call me “mainie” again.’
She drove to Tombstone Beach straight after her dinner shift. It was totally black out. Dark came early, still. It was cold, even rugged up in her trakkies and hoodie. Lifting the graveyard’s quaint wooden gate, she saw her breath rise up like a ghost.
He was hard to find. There were shitloads of them, going back to the 1800s. Then her torch found a flash of bright-blue tiles among the grey stones.
TIFFANY EMILY KING
1985—2000
A beautiful angel
Briefly among us
Forever in our hearts
We’ll miss you every day
Until we meet in heaven, sweetheart
Mum & Dad
There was a dolphin engraved on the plaque. Seashells and starfish glued to the tiles. Blue glass hearts. Like a teenage girl’s bedroom in grave form. Paulina didn’t know whether to cry or throw up.
She passed her torch over the neighbouring headstone, and there he was. King Among Kings. Loving Husband, Father.
She took a swig from her flask. Then she shook up the spray-can.
Something rustled. Her heart stopped. Shit solidified in her guts, though she hadn’t eaten since yesterday. She flicked off her torch, tried to silence her body.
Nothing. Probably just the wind, or a feral chicken or something.
As soon as she flicked her torch back on though, there he was: golf shirt, pale lips, pale eyes, creeping among the headstones.
‘Oi, Yooey, you perv!’ Paulina chucked the spray can at him. ‘If you want a date, go to the pub like everyone else, for fuck’s sake!’
He bolted.
Terror in her heart, Paulina power-walked in the opposite direction, back to her car. As soon as the doors were locked, she guzzled the contents of her flask.
She found him the next day, right where she expected him to be: waiting for his Hawaiian ham-steak and chips at the Bowls Club.
‘Hey, Merle,’ she said softly — too soft for him to hear. She tried again, louder, with a little wave. ‘Merle?’
Merle started. The look in his eyes was pure alarm. He still had a mark on his cheek.
‘Making it up to your boyfriend after your tiff, eh?’ Kobby heckled her from the green.
Paulina rolled her eyes. ‘Yeah, something like that.’
‘You know where to find me, if it doesn’t work out.’
‘Cheers.’ Paulina pulled up a chair and looked at Merle. ‘Can I?’
He looked at her for a long time, unreadable as a cat perched on a high fence. Then he said, ‘Alright.’
Paulina smoothed her nice-girl skirt as she sat.
‘Just wanted to say, I’m really sorry for …’ She pointed at his cheek. ‘All that. It was an accident. I feel so bad.’
Merle nodded.
‘Do you think you can forgive me, someday?’
Merle nodded, smiled. ‘It’s alright.’
‘Geez! That was easy.’ Tears spilled from her eyes. ‘I got you some presents, too; Fisherman’s Friend. I know how you like them.’
Paulina rummaged in her handbag, pulled out a handful of packets and arranged them in front of Merle. He nodded appreciatively. ‘Thank you.’
‘Also, this.’ She brandished a tube of sunscreen. ‘I thought you might need it, since summer’s coming. The sun gets pretty strong out here.’
Merle pulled a face like she’d fed him something sour. ‘I’m not a mainie.’
‘Yeah, I know!’
‘Keep it,’ he told her. ‘For yourself.’
Paulina rolled her eyes and stuffed it back inside her bag. ‘Fine, but don’t blame me if you get skin cancer.’
Merle found that hilarious. When he was done laughing, he said, ‘Lunchtime?’
‘Yeah.’ Paulina glanced at her watch. ‘Should be here soon.’
‘Salad for you?’
‘Oh, nah. Not today.’
Merle looked so heartbroken, Paulina bit her lip, checked her watch again. ‘I mean … I guess there’s time. They’re probably closed for lunch, anyways.’
Merle didn’t ask who “they” were, just smiled big.
‘Hey,’ Paulina greeted Barry, the bartender. ‘What salads do you ha
ve today?’
‘Pine Brew. Lion Red. Steinlager—’
‘Yeah, nah. Actual salad.’
‘Caesar. Pasta. Niçoise.’
‘Ugh … Niçoise, I guess.’ She handed over her card. ‘I’ll get Merle’s lunch, too.’
When the salad came, it was just a dank mix of lettuce, pickled vegetables, and canned tuna. She picked up her fork begrudgingly, nibbled an olive.
‘Alright?’ Merle asked her.
‘Yeah,’ Paulina bluffed. ‘It’s alright.’
She ate just enough for it to not seem like an insult.
It was an hour till school pick-up when Paulina left the cop shop, but Kymba’s car was already parked outside. Kymba rolled her window down as Paulina was walking to the Mazda.
‘There you are. I was wondering why your car was here.’
‘Oh, yeah. I was at the station. Yooey was being a pest again. Was hoping they could give him a warning or whatever.’
‘He’s had so many warnings.’ Kymba rolled her eyes. ‘He didn’t touch you, did he?’
‘Nah, just spooked me a bit. It was nighttime. I didn’t know he came out at night.’
‘He usually doesn’t. His mum’s in hospital right now. That’s probably why.’
‘Yeah, that’s what they said. Oi, why’re you here so early?’
Kymba nodded at Ollie, strapped into his baby chair in the backseat. ‘I was driving him around. It helps put him to sleep. Then I figured, the others will be out soon. I may as well enjoy the quiet time while I have it.’
Paulina laughed, glanced at the passenger seat.
‘Go ahead.’ Kymba smiled. ‘It’s nice talking to an adult after a day of goo-goo ga-ga.’
Letting herself into the car, Paulina shut the door softly. ‘Gawd, he’s beautiful. Look at those cheeks.’
‘No freckles, yet. Hopefully he won’t take after Simmo like the other two.’
‘I saw Merle before.’
‘Oh? How is he?’
‘Yeah, fine. Just wanted to say sorry for the other night.’
Kymba looked blank.
‘You know.’ Paulina mimed. ‘After Car’s funeral. When I elbowed him?’
Kymba flushed. ‘Oh God! I completely forgot. Can you tell my brain is mush?’
‘Ha, kinda.’
‘Sorry about that. Merlinda was way out of line.’
‘Yeah. I provoked her, but.’ Paulina drew up her sleeve to show her bracelet of bandages. ‘Tabby, too.’
‘Oh my God, Paulina!’ Kymba gasped. ‘What did you do?’
Paulina shrugged. ‘Tried to get her to own up to some shit. She wouldn’t.’
‘They’re all like that, the older ones.’ Kymba waved her hand. ‘Well, not all of them. But a lot of them. They’re so attached to this idea of what it means to be a “King”, it’s like the law doesn’t apply to them. It doesn’t, a lot of the time.’
‘Yeah?’
‘A few years back, when I was pregnant with Hunter …’ Kymba fingered the steering wheel. ‘A group of boys ganged up on this one girl. When her parents tried to report it, the boys’ mums all said they were home watching TV.’
‘Shit.’
‘I wanted to leave, then and there. Simmo convinced me to stick it out. He said this place’d never change if we just left it to the dogs. I’ll see if he’s still saying that when Zoe turns twelve.’
‘Bloody hell.’
Kymba shrugged. ‘It’s not like those things don’t happen on the mainland; it’s just not someone with your surname, normally. At least I can tell Zoe who to avoid.’
‘Hope she listens better than me.’
‘Car.’ Kymba shook her head. ‘I felt so cool, when he took an interest. I didn’t stop to think what this big man who’d travelled all around the world was doing buying booze for his kid-cousin.’
‘You were cooler than me. I never drank till I was legal. Just stayed home having screaming matches with Mum.’
‘Oh, I did that, too. I’m sure I’ve got some bad karma coming.’
‘You’ll be right.’
‘I’ll stay away from the supply ship, just in case.’ Kymba smiled at her sidelong. ‘I still can’t believe that happened, you know. It makes me so happy.’
Paulina laughed. ‘I was at the doctor’s. I just cracked up. He thought I was mental.’
‘Sometimes I start laughing when I’m home with the kids and they’re all, “What’s so funny, Mummy?” I don’t know what to tell them: “Oh, just thinking about how your Uncle Car had to be fished out of the Pacific so the sharks wouldn’t eat him”?’
‘Ha, maybe when they’re older.’
‘No,’ Kymba said. ‘They won’t even know they had an Uncle Car, when they’re older. His name won’t mean anything.’
CASUARINA
‘I knew it!’ Caro clapped her hands. ‘I knew it!’
Judy burst into tears. ‘You had no idea!’
‘I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!’ Caro poked her in the ribs. ‘I’ve been suss ever since you asked me about gym memberships!’
‘Ouch!’ Judy winced. ‘It’s not the gym. I’m lovesick. I can’t eat. I can’t sleep.’
‘You can drink.’ Noting Judy’s empty glass, Caro went over to the intercom. ‘Tim, we’re going to need a bottle.’
A minute later, Tim shuffled upstairs, handed Caro a bottle of Merlot, and frowned at Judy’s red eyes. ‘Should I set up the spare room?’
Caro nodded.
‘I invited him to stay in the spare room,’ Judy lamented, once Tim had made himself scarce. ‘I never dreamed of more. He kicked up a big stink about it. “I’m not coming all that way to sleep in a spare room” — he said that.’
Caro refilled their glasses. ‘Sneaky little shit.’
‘He said I was beautiful. He said he loved me.’ Judy drank. ‘He lied.’
‘A man, lying? Stop the presses.’
‘I never would’ve let it go this far, if he didn’t say those things. He said them, then he took them back. He told me being with me would be like necrophilia. Like I’m a corpse.’
Caro dabbed Judy’s cheek. ‘Corpses don’t cry.’
‘I’m dying of shame. Just bury me now.’
‘Jude.’ Sighing, Caro sat cross-legged on the bed. ‘I think what he meant is, it’d be like digging up the dead. Disrespectful to Paulina?’
‘No. I’m decrepit.’ A tear plopped into Judy’s glass. ‘I really thought he loved me.’
‘Jude.’
‘He said he’d never felt like this before. He felt it from the first time we met—’
‘What, when you were drugged to the eyeballs and could barely dress yourself?’
‘We … connected.’
‘You were grieving.’
‘I love him.’ Judy hugged her knees to her chest, cried into them. ‘It hurts.’
‘Oh, honey.’ Caro plucked Judy’s glass and moved it to the nightstand. ‘I know.’
‘I love him so much.’
‘I know, I know.’ Caro petted her hair. ‘But, Jude: surely you didn’t think you were going to run off into the sunset with your daughter’s boyfriend?’
‘He wasn’t her boyfriend. And, not the sunset, just—’
‘A good root?’
Judy rolled her eyes, nodded. Caro cracked up, all over again.
‘Please, don’t.’ Judy grabbed a silky pillow to dry her face on. ‘I’m ashamed enough, already.’
‘Sorry, but …’ Caro stifled a laugh. ‘This is brilliant.’
‘It isn’t.’
‘Jude. When was the last time you seriously thought about rooting anyone?’
Judy shrugged. ‘After Marko died, sometimes.’
‘Fifteen years? Twenty?’
‘Paulina was s
o angry after the funeral.’ She sniffed. ‘She was this little ball of rage. I wasn’t going to make it worse by bringing some bloke into the house.’
‘She was angry.’ Caro took a swallow of wine. ‘Understandably.’
‘And I always worried, what if I did and he ends up molesting her or something? You never know.’
‘No,’ Caro agreed. ‘You were right to be cautious.’
‘Besides. I was so busy putting dinner on the table and making sure she ate it. The blues we had … any man would’ve run a mile.’
‘I would’ve helped out more, if you let me.’
‘I’ve never wanted — no man. Not like this.’
‘Marko?’
‘Not like this.’
‘Come on, Jude.’
‘Not like this.’ She reached for her glass; drank deep. ‘No man’s ever called me smart before.’
Caro laughed in disbelief. ‘That’s it? Not … his body?’
‘Yes, that, too.’ Judy sighed. ‘But he took me seriously.’
Her sister looked at her sideways. ‘You know, all things considered, he’s not the worst guy you’ve gone for.’
‘He’s perfect.’
‘Perfect? No. He’s your dead daughter’s boyfriend.’
‘They were just friends.’
‘You don’t believe that.’
Judy wiped her eyes. ‘No.’
‘He would’ve fathered your grandkids.’
Nodding, Judy’s eyes welled with fresh tears. ‘How could I do this to her?’
‘She’s laughing her arse off, wherever she is.’
Judy watched her sister’s bony hands, topping up their glasses.
‘You remind me of her so much, sometimes.’
‘Fuck. So do you.’ Caro averted her eyes. ‘Sometimes you’ll make a face or say something, and it’s like she’s in the room with us. It gives me the willies.’
‘She was more like you.’
‘In some ways. The crying. That was you.’
‘She was like you as a kid.’
‘Well, you did a better job than our parents did.’ Shiny-eyed, Caro gulped. ‘Even with all your screwing around.’
‘I haven’t changed.’
‘Falling for your daughter’s boyfriend? Classic Jude.’
‘I’m so stupid.’
‘So stupid. Look at that face.’
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