by Jessa James
“Well, you told them they aren’t welcome here, so that will be that. There’s no way they’ll show up with their horses knowing they aren’t going to be allowed to run.”
It was almost unfathomable that he would think it would be this simple. “Have you gone over this with our attorneys? There’s a good chance that there is nothing we can do to stop them from racing. It’s a contract they signed with us. Whether we try to give the money back or not, that contract probably has to be dealt with in a court. I don’t think we can just cancel it because we’ve decided it’s not in our best interests to let the Killarnys race.”
He shook his head. “No, I haven’t called Terrence. Didn’t seem like the sort of thing I should call him in for.”
“But Dad, you think they are doping their horses. If they are indeed up to something, then I think you might want to get an attorney involved just to cover our asses. For the record, I really don’t think that you have anything to worry about with them—Pete seemed like a pretty upstanding guy.”
My father’s eyes narrowed. “Don’t you even think about defending him. He’s the son of scum, and I guarantee you he’s not much different from his father. I don’t want to hear you try to defend him again.”
I threw my hands up in the air. “I’m not defending him. I’m telling you what I witnessed. He looks like a guy who loves his kid and is trying to do right by her and the rest of his family. I know I didn’t do a thorough search of the stable or anything like that, but dad…you know Sean Killarny. You guys were great friends for the longest time at least; I thought I remembered it that way. Now that I think about it, you haven’t really been close to him in a while. Pete seems to think that there is something bad going on between the two of you, but I don’t know what—”
“What did that bastard say to you?”
I thought he was going to fly out from behind his desk, but his hands gripped the edge of the mahogany, and he gritted his teeth. His entire face had gone deep red and it looked like his eyes could bug out of his head.
“Dad…I’m sorry. Just calm down. You’re going to give yourself a stroke if you respond like that to something you think Pete Killarny said to me. The truth is he didn’t really say anything at all. It was like he was under the impression that this was something private and he didn’t think it was his business to tell me.” I paused and gave my father a long look. “But you know whose business it is? Yours. If there is something going on here, then I need to know about it. I am one half of this company now, and you owe it to me not to keep things from me. I have worked hard with you ever since I came back. And I thought you trusted me.”
My father bowed his head slightly and shook it. “I’m sorry, Sara. I shouldn’t be taking this out on you. Honestly, it has nothing to do with you, and I wish that you wouldn’t pry and ask questions. As far as I’m concerned it’s in the past…all that stuff with Sean Killarny. I guess I’ve been thinking about it a lot more recently and I’m not sure why.” He paused, then his voice took on that gruff tone when he spoke again. “But that doesn’t change the fact that they don’t need to be in our derby.”
I sighed. I felt like I was doing nothing but sighing during our conversation, but it was absolutely unbelievable the way he was acting.
“So how do you propose we take care of this situation? The Killarny brothers are going to show up on our property in two weeks with trailers in tow, and they are going to expect to be able to race.”
He shrugged. “I’ll have the sheriff’s department here ready to tell them to get their asses back to Kentucky.”
I shook my head and slammed my hand down on his desk. “We cannot do that. Think about the scene we would be making. People will ask questions…people are going to be asking them anyway, but doing things this way would make it much worse. So unless you want to explain to fifteen other horse owners why you are sending one of the most prestigious ranches in the country home packing, then I suggest you come up with something else.”
He thought for a moment. “Highway patrol then. They can be waiting for them on the road before they get here. We’ll stop them.”
The conversation was exasperating. “Dad, that is not an answer. They are contracted to run. You’re going to have to figure something out legally. And until you do, I think we have to prepare for and expect the Killarny family to be here when the derby rolls around. Now if you’ll excuse me…” I stood to leave. “I’ve got a lot of planning to do for the rest of the derby.”
I didn’t wait to see what else he had to say. The office door slammed behind me as I left. Instead of going to my own office where a lot of work awaited me, I headed outside, not quite sure of where I was going, but knowing that I needed to do something to get away from my father and whatever kind of crap he was pulling. It wasn’t that I was going to clear my head…no, on the contrary, I had a lot of things to think about regarding my father and what was going on with the Killarnys. My shoes crunched against the gravel on the road that led toward our small personal stable, and I knew then that I was going to go visit Sadie.
My horse was waiting for me in her stall and just as happy as she always was to see me. I saddled her and brought her out of the stable, climbing on and taking her for a ride out in the back pasture. While most of our land was devoted to the derby and usually all I saw was the paddock and the track, out in the back of the property was where I had grown up, riding horses. Our first house, the one my parents had moved into when they married, the one they lived in when I was born, was out here nestled in a grove of pecan trees. It was rented to one of our employees now, and I rode past the place, taking in the scene of the tiny white house and thinking about all of the memories I had there.
They were few if I was honest because all of those memories had come to an end when my parents decided to divorce. I was only five years old when it happened, so none of it had made any sense to me. All I knew was that my mother would be moving to a different house and that I would split time between the two places.
But before all that, before the split, we had been very happy. At least things had been from my side of things. I had no idea what my parents’ relationship had been like because I had been so young when it happened. Those memories of warmth and happiness were what came flooding back as I looked at the old house. It was those thoughts that made me think about how much I wanted something like that for myself. I had thought I had found it with Dalton, but that had come to a swift and painful end.
The end of one relationship didn’t take away my needs and wants though. I still believed in love, though I had a hell of a time trusting a man after what had happened to me. I believed in marriage, even though my example hadn’t been a great one. And I wanted to have children—with someone I loved and who wanted them with me. It was a dream that had been there for a very long time, and it wasn’t going away. I loved kids, and I wanted them in my life. Now that I was 30, it wasn’t that time was ticking, but I knew I needed to put myself back out there if I was ever going to get the opportunity to start a family of my own.
I sighed as I rode away from the house. My parents’ divorce had been a difficult adjustment, but something I was able to cope with over the years. I was still close to my mother, and we had a wonderful relationship, but because of my work with the derby, I saw more of my father these days.
That brought my mind back to him as I continued on through the pasture on Sadie’s back. She was clearly enjoying the ride, and I made a mental note to get out here more often with her. Horse riding had been such a big part of my life, and I wished I hadn’t let it slip to the back burner.
I could tell there was something more behind what was going on between my father and the Killarnys. Pete had alluded to something but wasn’t willing to go into it, and I thought it was probably out of respect for my father. It made sense that if my father had a problem that he should be the one to tell me about it. Something about the doping claim just didn’t check out. When I had looked into the files, there was nothing on the Killarny hors
e's that would make me think they were doping. Of course, we didn’t have any records on them for the past couple of years since they hadn’t run the horse in the two years prior. I knew enough gossip around the derby circuit to know that things weren’t great financially at Killarny Estate and really hadn’t been since Emily Killarny’s death a few years before. This would be the first year they had a horse in our derby since her death. They needed the money a win in our derby would bring—I knew it, and so did my father. So, of course, it made sense that Pete was refusing to back down. They had too much time and training invested in the horse they were planning to bring to the derby.
As I made my way back to the stable, I was becoming more resolved. I was going to have to get to the bottom of this, but there weren’t many places where the answers could be hiding. There also weren’t many people I could ask about what was going on between my father and Sean Killarny. Pete would have been my best bet, but I was in no mood to call him up and try to beg for the information, not after the previous night. A part of me hoped they wouldn’t show up to the derby so that I would never have to lay eyes on him again. The thought of facing him after that hot encounter in his study was mortifying. And arousing as hell.
I gritted my teeth as I hopped down off Sadie and led her back to her stall. I gave her a good brushing and gave her some fresh hay. She was as happy as a clam, and that made me smile.
“I’ll be back to see you again soon,” I said as I patted her and closed the stall door behind me.
Heading off in the direction of the house, I wanted to avoid my father, but I knew that I was going to have to get into his office soon. I didn’t know where to start, but I knew there was something lurking there for me to find. Somewhere there had to be some information about why he was so dead set on keeping the Killarny family away from our derby, and I was going to have to be the one to find out what it was.
7
Pete
* * *
It had been no surprise to wake up and find that Sara had already left. She was used to derby life, and any kind of business that involved animals tended to create early risers. She must have been up, and out of the house before dawn, I thought as I looked out the window and saw that her car was no longer where Sam and Stephen had parked it the night before after they were able to bring it back to life.
I showered and got dressed, trying not to let my mind dwell on Sara Waters for any longer than absolutely necessary. I knew I would see her again in two weeks when we showed up for the derby, with or without the approval of Ken Waters, but until then I needed to focus on the things that had to happen around the ranch to make going to the derby possible. We needed to know how many trailers we were taking, the number of personnel that would be going with us, and Alex was going to have to decide for certain which horse was going to run.
Downstairs, I started breakfast, and as I was finishing up scrambling some eggs, Emma came bounding through the door.
“Back already?” I asked.
She nodded and dropped her bag on the floor. “Yeah, Dani and her mom had somewhere to be this morning, so they dropped me off on the way there.” She grabbed a piece of bacon and sat down at the table. “Where’s Sara?”
I looked at her a little surprised. “Oh, uh…she had to leave. She had to get back to the derby. Lots of work to do leading up to the big event. And you know it wasn’t in the plan for her to stay here in the first place. That just happened because her car broke down. She was ready to be on her way home, I’m sure.”
Emma got up and grabbed a glass from the cupboard then reached for the orange juice from the fridge. “Want any?” she asked as she poured herself a glass.
“No, I think I’ll just have coffee, thanks.”
She put the juice back and took a seat again. I could feel her eyes on me as I made us each a plate of scrambled eggs, bacon, and fruit. When I set the plate in front of her, I could see that the wheels were turning in her brain.
“What’s going on with you?” I asked, genuinely curious about what was going on in her mind.
“I was just wondering when you were going to ask her out on a date,” she said without a pause.
I was taken aback but tried not to let it show. “Why would you think I was going to do that?”
She smiled. “See…you didn’t say you weren’t going to!”
I narrowed my eyes at her as I took a bite of scrambled eggs. She dug into her breakfast as well, and I waited until she had a full mouth before I spoke again.
“I didn’t say that, but…well, what would you think if I did?”
She shrugged as she finished swallowing a bite. “I don’t know why you don’t date. You’ve never ever brought anyone home. I mean…Dad, I know that you’ve been on dates, but I don’t think you’ve been on any in a long time. And you’ve never told me about them.”
I nodded. “Well, you know it’s a grown up thing, and relationships can be complicated. I’ve never wanted to get you involved unless I knew it was someone who was going to stick around…” I realized the words only after they had left my mouth.
Emma frowned. “You mean someone who isn’t like Mom?”
I sighed. It had always been important to me to never say anything disparaging about Kelly in front of Emma. If the woman ever acted like she wanted to have a relationship with our daughter, then I wanted the door to be open to the possibility. There was no need for me to share my opinion of the woman and the way she had abandoned both of us. It had never really mattered to me what Kelly thought about me or what kind of communication she wanted us to have, but I had always wanted her to have something with Emma. The fact that she had never been consistent and had hardly ever reached out over the years had been painful for me to witness, but I knew that it had to be so much more than that for my daughter who was missing out on having a mother in her life entirely.
“If I was going to bring someone around, I would want to make sure that it was the sort of woman that I thought would be a great role model for you. Someone who had some drive and knew what she wanted out of life. And I would hope that what she wanted would include the both of us. We’re a package deal, you and me. You know that, right?”
She nodded and smiled. Emma was still a young girl at twelve, but I was already starting to see a glimpse of the woman she was going to be and it was both exciting and terrifying. I knew that my daughter was strong, capable, and intelligent, and whenever I decided that I was going to date again, with serious intentions, I wanted it to be someone that she could look up to.
“I know, Dad. But for that to happen you’re going to have to actually go out on dates.”
“From the mouths of babes,” I said as I looked down toward my plate. “Okay, well now that I know that you want me to go on dates, maybe I can take it a little more seriously. I just want you to know that no matter who comes into my life, you come first. No matter what, I want you to be able to come talk to me and tell me what you think about things. This is early days still and who knows—I might not even find anyone. Maybe I’ll be a bachelor for the rest of my life.”
Emma wrinkled her nose. “Eww. Dad, no. You’re too young for that. You need to get out there and find someone. And I thought that Sara was really nice. She’s funny, and she seems like she is really smart. And both of you work with horses. It sounds like it could be a good match.”
“What do you know about good matches?” I asked as I gave her a look.
“Dad, I watch TV and movies. It’s not that difficult to figure out.”
I just smiled and shook my head and continued eating my breakfast. I wasn’t sure what I thought about my twelve year old talking about good matches, but I had to admit that she was probably right. Me hanging my hat up and not going out and dating for the last few years hadn’t been the greatest idea, not if I ever intended to get back out there.
We finished eating breakfast while Emma told me about her slumber party and her plans with her friends throughout the spring. It sounded like they were goi
ng to be pretty busy before the summer got started. Once Emma had finished breakfast she bounded away off to the stables for her morning ride with Saoirse and cleaned up the dishes, my mind returning to dating and the prospect of starting all that again.
Sara Waters though—that was another story. She was something entirely different. The attraction between us was palpable, and I wanted her—badly. I wasn’t sure if she was someone I would want to date long term because I really didn’t know the woman beyond the interaction we had had the day before and that had been fairly intense. Before that, we had only known each other as children, so there was a gulf between who we were then and who we were now. But I was willing to find out more about Sara, and I planned to get much more familiar with her soon.
* * *
Derby preparation continued at Killarny Estate and all of my brothers stuck to their individual tasks to get us ready to take our horses down to Tennessee. It was one of our biggest events of the year, and since we hadn’t been in the Waters Derby for the past two years since my mother’s death, this was a big one for us.
Going to the Waters Derby had always been a family affair. We would all load up in our trailers and head down to Tennessee for the week. There was an area for all the people with horses in the derby to park their trailers and RVs and it was like one big family reunion with some healthy competition thrown in for that entire week leading up to the race.
I hadn’t been to the derby in years though. My work had been primarily back here at the ranch and with Emma so young I had always kept close by, instead of hauling her down to the derby. It was strange, now that I thought about it, because we had gone to a lot of the derbies that were closer by, but I knew what it was all about when it came down to it. I didn’t want to see Ken Waters and if not going to his derby accomplished that, then that’s what I would do. I knew that what was between my father and Ken Waters was just that—between the two of them. But I couldn’t get the bad taste in my mouth to go away about the man. I despised him, and I never wanted to see him again.