Chapter 4
Another Monday reared its ugly head much sooner than I possibly could have imagined. Sometimes it feels like there are two Mondays in the week...they seem to come with such speed. My stomach was in knots when I showed up at the office. I'd been that way for a whole week.
Andrea didn't help. I'm in love with him.
Now I knew. That whole deep depression every time he cuddled up to a hot wolf was more related to my feelings for him than my own self-hatred. I dreaded work, not knowing what to say, dropping paper clips in mid-clip, spilling cocoa on the brand new keyboard, and in general turning red and blustery when Rob asked anything, which goes back to the not 'knowing what to say' part.
I suppose I should have faced my feelings long ago.
And here I was again, feeling awkward, and rather put out that a week had flashed by so quickly. In three more Mondays, I might get to experience the same joy of rebuilding the office. I thought of putting dog repellent at the entrance. I wondered if that stuff really worked. Of course, Rob would know not only what it was, but who was responsible for it. Not the best idea. But I needed a good idea and fast.
“Morning Sunshine.” Rob strode into the office with laptop case in one hand and bag of doughnuts in the other. Did I mention how much I love him? He brings doughnuts when I'm down.
Somehow my lips quirked up. Maybe I should have made him work for my good mood, but I'm just not that kind of person. I gave my best cheery greeting. “Good Morning.”
This was the day that we were going to have it out. That brow of Rob's doesn't just furrow over anything. He took off his jacket and unbuttoned his sleeves, rolling them up without a word. The last time he did that the conversation turned to the color pink. It sounds weird, but Rob asked me to please not wear a particular pink outfit, which is rather a personal request considering that he's my boss and believe me, there is nothing wrong with that outfit.
Anyway, with furrowed brow and unbuttoned sleeves, I wondered if this conversation would cover black pencil skirts or the awkwardness between us. I was betting on the awkwardness.
“I thought maybe we could talk.” Rob said in the tone that conjured images of dental drills and bleeding ulcers. What he really meant was that he'd sit very still and wait until I spilled my innermost thoughts in the awkward silence.
I tucked a strand of curly hair behind my ear and practiced my best Homecoming Princess smile. It was a dream I'd had once, to be popular and loved. I'd practiced in the mirror for weeks, just in case by some miracle I had been picked, but the pack ruled and queen and court were combination wolves and human.
Not a mouse, raccoon, ferret, or porcupine to be found. If nothing else, I gained a killer smile, which came in handy at times like this. “Sure.” I said.
“Okay.”
Rob turned and walked into his office. Safe in my leather chair, hiding behind my rather spacious new guilt-purchased desk, I waited. He probably wanted me to follow him in, but I was just ornery enough to stay where I was. Boss or no boss, I needed a better work environment.
When I didn't immediately follow him into his office, Rob rolled his chair out. A werewolf giving up the high ground, now that was something. If nothing else, Rob liked me well enough to keep me.
“Look, I'm sorry about last week. If I could do it over, I would.”
I wanted to say, “It's okay.” But it wasn't, or “You're forgiven” but for what? It's not like I was his girlfriend or wife or anything important in his life. I shrugged, “Bad timing.”
“Bad timing? You've been tripping around me for a week. What is going on?”
But he knew. I knew he knew. He knew he knew. He probably even knew I knew he knew. And now I was a little mouse running on a little wheel in my mind wondering if I could safely jump off. I love you, Rob? The funniest thing happened over the past few months...I fell in love. Hey, did you hear the one about the wolf and the mouse.
But did he like me back? Ah, the question for the ages. And I was of the firm opinion that happy chat or not, he would make the first move. And that move would probably include the word 'friends' or maybe the notorious, 'I'll call you'.
It was in his eyes. He wanted me to tell him I cared for him, so that he could have it all out in the open and let me down easy. But how? We spend hours alone together, and believe me this love-in-the-dark strangeness is nothing compared to the strangeness that would occur if I brought it out into the open.
“I'm just having some trouble with this whole office liaison thing.” The truth in its entirety wrapped with a pretty bow, and with a safe 'l' word.
Rob didn't say a word. Not a single word. He just sat there staring at me.
“Well?” I couldn't stand him just sitting.
That seemed to wake him up. “Why? Do you have feelings for me?” Rob asked.
He went there. He really did. That's a wolf for you. No sense for cowering in the corner and waiting to see what happens.
“Feelings?” I sputtered. “Are we going to talk about feelings?” This was the moment when a witty rejoinder would have come in handy. Unfortunately, I'm not fast on my feet.
“Our conversations used to feel comfortable.”
This time I think my smile was rueful, and my eyes probably had that puppy dog look which is an unfortunate side-effect of caring. “I know. I'm sorry. Can't we just put this conversation on hold awhile?”
Yeah, like forever?
Rob nodded once and stood. “Has the new ad come through for approval?”
Phew. Back on solid ground. “Next Tuesday.”
We both knew the answer to that one, but it put the conversation firmly back into the business sphere were it belonged and desperately needed to be.
Moon Struck: When Were & Howl Book 1 Page 4