Why would she need him?
His dad had left. Jennifer had left. Leaving Carter with a gaping wound. A reminder he wasn’t enough.
And walking that shadowy path instead of letting God light the way, he’d come to the conclusion that God had abandoned him, too.
God, I messed up. You’ve been here all along but I didn’t see it. I don’t know what You’ve got planned, but I’m in, no matter what. I’ll make mistakes but Ellery was right. Those are better than regrets.
“Daddy?” Bea was sitting up in bed.
“Hey, Issybea.”
“Is it Christmas?”
“Almost.”
Bea reached out her arms and Carter sat down on the edge of the bed. She snuggled against his chest and her gaze dropped to the book in his hand.
“That’s my book, Daddy. I drew the cover myself.”
Carter cleared his throat. “You did a great job.”
“Can you read it again?”
“Sure.”
Somehow, he made it through a second time.
“There’s one more.” Bea turned the book over. On the back, three stick figures, one a woman with sable-brown hair and vivid, blue-green eyes.
Ellery.
“Uh-huh. But I couldn’t finish it,” Bea said. “‘Cause I don’t know how to spell all the words.”
Carter snagged one of the crayons scattered on Bea’s nightstand. “Maybe Daddy can help you with that. What do you want to say?”
“Miss El’ry stays forever.”
Carter’s arms tightened around his daughter.
That was what he wanted, too.
* * *
Ellery winced when the floorboards creaked underneath her feet.
The house was quiet, but she’d been awake for hours, staring up the ceiling in Sunni Mason’s guest room. She’d finally given up on sleep and gone downstairs in search of a cup of coffee. Her solitary wanderings led her to the room behind the kitchen, where a wall of windows framed a stunning view of the river.
All the evidence of Liam and Anna’s wedding reception had been swept away, but hundreds of tiny white lights winked in the branches of the Christmas tree and a row of hand-knit stockings bulging with treasure hung from the fireplace mantel. The family had unanimously voted to delay the official gift opening until Anna and Liam returned from a short honeymoon, but Sunni must have decided the twins needed some small gifts to tide them over.
“There’s one for you, too.”
Ellery turned and saw Brendan standing a few feet behind her. “I haven’t had a stocking for years.”
“It’s a Kane family tradition...” Brendan closed his eyes. “I’m sorry, Ellery.”
“You don’t have to be.” Ellery smiled. “It was thoughtful of Sunni to include me.”
Brendan didn’t smile back. “I wasn’t talking about the stockings. I’m sorry I didn’t tell Aiden and Liam about you sooner. We could have been there for you when you lost your parents, but instead you had to face everything alone.” A muscle worked in his jaw. “I was afraid that if Aiden didn’t find you, he’d never forgive me. Now I’m hoping you can.”
“Brendan...no.” Ellery closed the distance between them, reached out and squeezed her big brother’s hand. “It was because of my parents that I know I wasn’t alone. I was driving myself crazy, wondering why they didn’t share any details about my biological family, but I know it was because they were protecting me. Just like you were protecting Liam and Aiden.
“We’ve missed out on a lot of years, but I believe God brought us back together again at exactly the right time.”
Brendan’s sigh of relief left a smile in its wake. “That’s what Aiden said, but don’t you dare tell him I said so.” He plucked a foil-wrapped Santa from the stocking with Aiden’s name embroidered on it. “Or that I gave you this.”
“I heard my name. And quit trying to bribe Ellery with chocolate.” Aiden sauntered into the room, Dodger tripping along at his heels. “I’m already her favorite.”
Brendan rolled his eyes. “You think you’re everyone’s favorite.”
Ellery grinned.
“Can I help it that people are drawn to my rapier wit and exceptional good looks?” Aiden winked at Ellery. “Merry Christmas, sis.”
“Merry Christmas.”
Sis.
Sweeter than the chocolate Santa.
Dodger peeled away from Aiden’s side and trotted over to Ellery. He dropped at her feet, tail wagging.
“Shameless groveling,” Aiden muttered as Ellery bent down to scratch the dog’s ears.
Scars bisected the fur on Dodger’s back like the seams on a patchwork quilt, visual remnants of the trauma he’d experienced. Carter had downplayed his role in the dog’s rescue and recovery, but he was the reason Dodger had found a forever home with her brother.
Carter was a good man, too. And it wasn’t because he’d adhered to a code of honor in the SEALS or followed his training as an officer. It was because he cared.
That was the man Ellery had fallen in love with.
Sometimes you just know, Lily had said.
But Carter wasn’t ready to put the past behind him and love her back.
Ellery had been concerned about her brothers’ reaction when she’d told them the truth. It hadn’t occurred to her that Carter was the one who would feel betrayed.
Aiden filched a candy cane from Liam’s stocking. “He’ll never miss it. It’s a good thing candy canes are in season. We bought them in bulk after we found out they were Sugar’s weakness.”
“That little girl is going to be pretty excited when she sees the big red bow on Sugar’s stall this morning,” Brendan said.
“Bow?” Ellery echoed.
“Carter called Sunni a few days ago and said they wanted to keep her.” Her brother shook his head. “I have no idea what got into him. Maybe he watched A Christmas Carol.”
Or read a book.
Ellery wished she could see Bea’s face when she realized Sugar’s forever home would be with her.
Tomorrow’s Christmas, El’ry. Aren’t you going to be here when I open my presents?
The question had torn Ellery up inside. Unlike her father, Bea thought Ellery belonged with them.
“Ellery?” Brendan sounded so serious that Ellery felt a stab of alarm. “I know the last forty-eight hours have been a little crazy, but there’s something we’d like you to think about.
“We know you have responsibilities in Grand Rapids, but Liam and Anna would love to spend more time with you when they get back from their honeymoon and we’re feeling kind of selfish where you’re concerned...”
“What Bren is trying to say is that we want you to stay a few weeks,” Aiden cut in. “Dodge and I will camp out in my old room and you can have the apartment above the garage. It’s set with Wi-Fi, so you can work remotely if there are deadlines to make for the foundation.”
Tears welled up in Ellery’s eyes. “I would love to spend more time with you but I need to go back to Grand Rapids for a few days...” She held up her hand when it looked like her brothers were going to protest. “I have to talk to Jameson in person.” She tempered the words with a smile. “Shop for fleece and insulated boots.”
And put some distance between her and Carter so her heart could begin to heal.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Carter stood on the front steps of Sunni Mason’s home, Bea’s book in his coat pocket and wearing a Santa hat made from construction paper, because facing Ellery wasn’t difficult enough.
The door swung open before he could knock. Aiden and Brendan blocked the doorway. Carter took one look at their faces and realized he was going to have to use all his negotiation tactics to get past them. It was too bad that Liam, the most reasonable of the three brothers, had left for his honeymoon.
“I’m here to see Ellery.”
Brendan folded his arms across his chest. “And you think she wants to see you?”
“Probably not,” Carter admitted.
“This is the first Christmas we’ve spent with our sister. Come back tomorrow.”
That was too easy. Carter’s eyes narrowed. “Will Ellery be here tomorrow?”
Their disgruntled expressions answered the question.
“I really need to talk to her.”
“Why?” Aiden folded his arms over his chest. “Did you remember a few more things she did wrong?”
Carter deserved that. “It wasn’t Ellery. I was the one who messed up. I was...”
“Out of line?” Brendan supplied.
“Stupid?” Aiden tossed another one into the mix.
“Both.”
Aiden nudged Brendan. “Sidebar.”
They stepped to one side and turned their backs on Carter.
“...been hurt enough,” he heard Brendan mutter.
It occurred to Carter that a future with Ellery wasn’t the only thing he’d put in jeopardy. There was a very real possibility he’d lost the friendship of men he’d come to respect and admire.
While Carter was weighing the odds of making it past them without being tackled, they blocked his path again, their expressions grim.
“We’ve been in your shoes,” Brendan said, stunning Carter down to his boots. “And we got a second chance to get it right.”
“Thanks—”
“Just don’t blow it,” Aiden warned.
Hope, the elusive thing Carter had once dismissed as a weakness, gave him the courage to walk through the door, Santa hat and all.
He followed Brendan and Aiden as they sauntered down the hallway and ushered him into a spacious family room.
Carter took one look at the mountain of discarded wrapping paper and realized he’d interrupted the family’s Christmas.
Anna’s twins were sprawled on the rug playing a board game. Maddie Montgomery was perched in a wingback chair, sipping hot chocolate, while Brendan’s wife, Lily, tried to wrestle a ribbon from the jaws of an overweight basset hound.
Sunni was the first one to realize her sons weren’t alone.
Their eyes met across the room and she nodded, almost as if she’d been expecting him.
Huh.
Carter took a tentative step toward Ellery. She sat on a braided rug in front of the fireplace, Dodger draped over her legs as she watched the twins.
For a moment, Carter simply drank in the sight of her. Her feet were bare and a baggy gray sweatshirt with the Castle Falls logo silk-screened on the front brushed the knees of her faded jeans.
The speech Carter had rehearsed on the drive to Castle Falls Outfitters dissolved like water on a hot griddle as her head turned in his direction.
Sunni clapped her hands, breaking the silence that had fallen over the room. “Okay, everyone. It’s time to start brunch, and I could use a little help in the kitchen.”
Everyone filed through the door and Carter had no doubt Ellery would exit the room right along with them if he didn’t give her a reason to stay.
“Ellery... I really need to talk to you.”
The wary look on her beautiful face just about wrecked him. He’d stepped away instead of stepping up, and Ellery had mistaken his silence as rejection.
The irony of that wasn’t lost on Carter. He’d been afraid she was going to reject him.
“Okay.” Ellery crossed her arms, waiting for him to explain.
“I...” The glimpse of a tiny silver bell dangling from the bracelet on her wrist momentarily robbed Carter of the ability to speak.
Worry flashed in Ellery’s eyes. “Is everything all right at home?”
No. It wasn’t. Not even close. Because she wasn’t there.
“Carter?” Ellery pressed when he didn’t answer. “Is it your mom? B-Bea?”
Carter shouldn’t have been surprised that Ellery was concerned about his family. That he’d thought for even a moment that this woman was as self-absorbed and manipulative as Jennifer was more proof of his stupidity.
He’d been running. From God. From himself. So focused on not repeating past mistakes he’d pushed away the only woman he could imagine a future with.
“Bea is fine...or at least she will be. She asked me to deliver a Christmas gift.”
* * *
Now Carter’s unexpected visit made sense. He would do anything for Bea.
But for one crazy moment, when Ellery had seen Carter walked into the living room with her brothers, she’d thought he’d had a change of heart.
Carter dipped his hand into the pocket of his coat and pulled out a package wrapped in gold foil. “You have to open it now.”
Ellery didn’t know how long she could hold her smile in place, but she’d do anything for Bea, too. Carter watched her fumble with the tape and peel back the paper.
She stared down at the cover of a very familiar book.
“I can’t accept this,” Ellery protested. “Bea wrote it for you.”
“Apparently, it wasn’t finished.” Carter’s hand closed over Ellery’s when she tried to give it back to him. “She added something else last night.”
Ellery was acutely aware of Carter’s gaze as she flipped through the pages until she reached the end of the book. “I don’t see...”
“Back cover.”
Ellery stifled a wild urge to laugh.
Carter couldn’t have led with that?
Ellery turned the book over and stole the breath from her lungs. Because the stick-figure woman in the center of the picture, the one holding Bea’s and Carter’s hands, had short, dark brown hair and blue-green eyes.
“She asked me to deliver the message that goes with it, too.” Carter’s husky voice tugged against nerve endings already stretched thin from the events of the past few days. “Would you like to hear it?”
Ellery couldn’t look at Carter. Couldn’t move without dislodging the tears that had banked in her eyes.
Fortunately, Carter didn’t wait for Ellery’s permission.
“Miss El’ry stays forever.”
God, this is too hard.
A tear broke free and zigzagged down Ellery’s cheek. She lifted her hand to wipe it away, but Carter beat her to it. Instead of staunching the flow, the gentleness of his touch threatened to open the floodgates even more.
“Tell her...thank you.” Ellery pivoted blindly toward the door, but Carter was suddenly in front of her.
“Ellery? It’s what I want, too.”
No. She couldn’t have heard... Ellery’s own tears were forgotten when she saw the diamond-bright sheen in Carter’s eyes.
“Yesterday, I was afraid of making a mistake, but the biggest mistake would be letting you walk out of my life without telling you how I feel.” Carter paused, as if struggling to find the right words. “After Jennifer left, I convinced myself that I could live without love...but I can’t live without you, Ellery. I don’t want to live without you. You turn scarves into reins and brooms into horses and you...you focus on the light instead of the shadows. You’re the one who taught me to smile again.” A corner of his lips inched up. “Literally.”
The lump in Ellery’s throat made it difficult to speak. Carter must have misinterpreted her silence for hesitation, because he took a step backward, his hands fisted at his sides.
“After the way I treated you, I don’t deserve your forgiveness, let alone a second chance...”
Love welled up inside of Ellery. She released a slow breath. Extended her hand.
“Ellery Marshall. I’m twenty-five years old and I run a nonprofit called the Marshall Foundation. I love puttering in the kitchen and ice-skating and sleigh rides and spending time with the people I love. I live in Grand Rapids, but I’m c
onsidering making Castle Falls my permanent home.”
Carter looked confused for a moment and then his smile expanded into that heart-stopping, take-no-prisoners grin.
“It’s nice to meet you.” He shook her hand and Ellery took a risk of her own. Instead of letting go, she stepped into the circle of Carter’s arms. Rested her head against his chest.
“Ellery?”
“Mmm-hmm?”
“Is this the forgiveness part? Or the second-chances part?”
“Both,” Ellery whispered. “Because I’m falling in love with you, too.”
Carter’s arms tightened around her. “For the last twenty-four hours, I’ve been trying to come up with some grand gesture, like those guys in the movies, so you’d believe me,” he admitted. “But the truth is, I’m not very good at romance—”
Ellery pressed a finger to his lips and gave him a teasing smile. “I guess we’ll have to practice that, too.”
“I guess we will.”
She was still smiling when Carter’s lips met hers in a kiss that celebrated the wonder of Christmas, new beginnings and the promise of tomorrow.
Epilogue
“You’re a natural at this, Ellery.” Aiden gave her an approving nod. “Rich used to say I had river water instead of blood in my veins and I think you inherited it, too.”
Ellery smiled at her twin and rested the canoe paddle on her lap, content to let the river set her course for the moment.
Aiden had knocked on her door when the sun was waking up and told Ellery to meet him by the river.
She’d been looking forward to this for months.
Two canoes were waiting by the riverbank, one with faded red flames flowing from bow to stern and the other one of Liam’s vintage designs.
Aiden had introduced her to Ben and Jerry, a pair of mischievous otters, and entertained her with stories about River Quest. Ellery had seen the passion blazing in Aiden’s eyes when he’d talked about modifications they would be making to next year’s course so that people with disabilities could compete in the event.
Ellery hadn’t said anything, but River Quest was the kind of project the Marshall Foundation could get behind. She made a mental note to talk to Phil. Two months ago, the woman had officially transitioned from housekeeper to full-time employee of the foundation.
The Holiday Secret (Castle Falls Book 4) Page 18