by Joyce Alec
“I’ll just be a few minutes,” she said hastily, quickly walking to her bedroom and closing the door tightly behind her. Adler, to her very great relief, didn’t follow her. In fact, he stayed where he was, although she could hear him talking to himself in the main part of the house.
Tears pricked in her eyes, but she dashed them away at once, knowing that she couldn’t show any sign of weakness in front of Adler. He wouldn’t think twice about simply laughing in her face at her tears, reminding her repeatedly that she’d chosen this life for herself. He’d done it already, more than once, and each time she’d been cut to the quick.
Quickly gathering herself, Jessie did her best to put on as many layers of clothes as she could, trying to hide her slim figure as best she could. Her hair was stuffed under a wide-brimmed bonnet, her unruly red curls behaving themselves for once. Looking at her reflection in the mirror on the wall, Jessie saw the fear in her green eyes. She hated being afraid of Adler and of what his intentions were, but most of all, she hated herself for making such a wrong and foolish choice.
“Hurry up!”
Jerking violently with fright, Jessie smoothed her hands over the front of her skirts and took in a long, slow breath, trying to steady her nerves. She didn’t want to be here. She didn’t want to have to do this, didn’t want to be under Adler’s control any longer—but the fact was, she had no other choice. She’d made her vows and taken that step forward into married life. The only way she’d be free of Adler was if he…
She couldn’t bring herself to think of it. Closing her eyes, she jumped again as Adler rapped hard on her bedroom door.
“I’m ready,” she said, hating that her voice trembled so much. Stepping out into the room, she winced inwardly as Adler’s greedy eyes ran over the length of her.
“You’ll be turning heads the minute we step out the door,” he said and grinned, folding his arms and leaning against the table with a smirk on his face. “I might take you past Martin Armstrong’s ranch, just to show you off.”
Her stomach dropped to her toes, revulsion rising in her. “Please don’t, Adler,” she begged, her hands clasped in front of her. “That ain’t right.”
He shrugged. “What do I care? Martin ought to have been there on time, then he might have been able to marry you like he said.”
She shook her head, remembering how Martin had shouted at Adler at the door of the house. She’d overheard every word, hearing that Martin had been late to the stage because one of his cows was struggling to birth her calf. It hadn’t been deliberate, but he’d not been able to leave the animal, fearing that she’d die without his help. The animals were his livelihood, and she understood now why he’d been held back from coming into town. Nor did she blame him for it. The only person to blame in all of this was herself.
“That would be hateful of you, Adler,” she said, trying to find some sort of courage within herself, attempting to defend and protect the man she’d already hurt so badly. “You don’t need to be doing that.”
His face darkened and he came towards her, grasping her arm in a tight, painful grip. “Don’t you go preaching to me, Jessie. If I want to show Martin just what he’s missing, then I’ll do it, and you won’t say a word against me. Understand?”
Jessie lifted her chin a notch, her mouth firmly closed. She had to try and be strong; she had to find something inside herself that would grow bold in the face of his anger and bitterness.
Adler shook her hard. “You’d best not get on the wrong side of me, Jessie. You’re my wife now, and that means I’ll treat you just as I please, without a soul to stop me. You go against me, then you’ll find life harder than you’ve ever known it before—and you won’t have a single word of complaint to make, since you know that you chose this all for yourself.” He chuckled, his lips curling back into a dark, terrifying snarl. “You chose me, Jessie. You turned your back on Martin, who’s as good a man as this town’s ever seen.”
Jessie caught her breath, tears coming into her eyes as Adler continued to threaten her. Adler had been so good at pretending that first day she’d met him, giving her the impression that Martin was everything she ought to fear. How stupid she’d been to believe him!
“Now get on out there and go find your horse,” Adler snarled, his breath hot in her face. “Keep your mouth closed and do as I tell you, no matter what that is. Go on with you now!”
A small shove almost had her falling over her feet, but she caught herself just in time. Tears crept into her eyes, and she couldn’t help but let them fall. The sun’s rays burned her cheeks, so she kept her head down, spiraling into a slow descent of misery as she made her way to her horse.
2
Trying to hide in the smallest, darkest corner she could, Jessie covered her head with her hands and slowed her breathing. If she could only make them forget that she was here, then they might go on drinking and fall into a stupor before long.
She had to pray that they would.
It had been hours since they’d left town, hours since the sun had gone down, and still, Adler showed no sign of wanting to go home. Instead, he made her cook and then serve him and the rest of the hired men, using the ingredients she’d found in the main part of the house. It hadn’t been much, but Jessie had gotten a distinct impression that it hadn’t been the food they were enjoying.
She’d hated being ogled and leered at. She’d felt disgusted at her husband’s behavior, laughing raucously at her in front of all the other men. Jessie felt herself shrink inside, her skin growing cold and clammy as she’d handed each of the men something to eat.
They’d started drinking soon after, and that was when she’d begun to feel truly afraid. The way they’d started to reach for her, to grab at her, had sent fear rifling through her. Adler had only laughed at her terror, almost encouraging the men to do more.
How she’d managed to escape from their notice, she wasn’t quite sure, but at least she was grateful for the quiet of the moment. Back here, in the corner of the room, she sat with her back against the wall and her head on her knees, her hands protectively over her head.
The men were still loud, talking and laughing as they drank. Adler had forgotten about her, too, it seemed, for he was the loudest of all. She hated the way he treated her and felt the hopelessness inside her begin to grow.
Her dress caught her tears, soaking the fabric. This wasn’t what she’d hoped for when she’d come out here to marry. Silently, she prayed that, somehow, she’d find a way out of this marriage, out of the fix she was in. If she stayed here, with Adler, then Jessie was sure that, at some point, she’d be injured in some way. What would she be, what would she look like, in a few years’ time? Would she be a shadow of whom she’d once been, silent and afraid? Would she look more like a wraith than a woman? Adler would have broken her spirit by then surely; he would have chased away every last ounce of hope, every last thought of escape. She’d be obedient, doing everything he said without question, barely reacting to his harsh words and actions. Was that really what she wanted for herself, for her future? If she wanted to avoid it, then she had to find a way to change all that.
But how?
Her breathing quickened as she slowly lifted her head. The men hadn’t looked at her in a long time. To them, she was invisible. Couldn’t she make use of this opportunity? Couldn’t she find a way out?
Back in town, Adler was almost always about. She’d never been given an opportunity to even think of leaving the house, and he’d made sure to make her so aware of what people thought of her that the shame of it had kept her confined regardless.
But now, out here on the ranch, she could disappear without Adler ever noticing. She could ride back to the house, collect her things, and ride out into the night.
Of course, given that Copper Peaks was miles from any other place of civilization, that just meant that she’d ride on out into the night with no idea of where she was going or what she was doing. Most likely, she’d end up half dead from exhaustion
and lack of water, before someone out amongst the dust and the sand brought her back to her husband. Jessie shuddered violently, knowing full well what Adler might do to her.
Her mind screamed for her to think of something, and Jessie closed her eyes tight, trying to come up with another idea. Wasn’t there anyone she could turn to? Anyone she could ask for help?
What about Hettie?
Jessie squeezed her eyes tighter, her hands curling into fists. Hettie Drummond was the only person to greet her out here in this new town, aside from Mrs. Draper, who lived next door to Adler. Hettie had gone out of her way to come to Adler’s home to say hello to Jessie, apparently to welcome her to the town. Hettie had explained that she was looking after Etta, the lady Adler had been meant to marry, and Jessie had felt her shame crash over her once more.
Of course, Hettie hadn’t ever criticized or condemned Jessie, which, in a way, had almost made things worse. But the more she thought of the lady, the more Jessie realized that there had never been any sort of censure in her eyes. It was as if she were truly trying to make Jessie know that she was both welcomed and accepted, by Hettie, at least.
Lifting her head just a little, Jessie let out a long, slow breath, fear crawling over her skin as she watched the men pass around yet another bottle. Hettie might be the only person able to help her, able to give her some sort of advice as to what she ought to do.
That would mean she’d have to find the courage to sneak out of the house, find her horse, and head on back to town before Adler even noticed she was gone. What Adler would do to her if she was caught, she didn’t want to think of.
Slowly, Jessie began to move towards the door just to her left. The floorboards creaked as she shuffled towards it, but with the noise of the men’s laughter, no one seemed to notice. The door was a little ajar, which was to her advantage, but as she reached for it with a trembling hand, she heard something that made her blood run cold.
“Where’s that wife of yours?” one of the men said, his words slurring. “She ought to be sitting on your lap, Adler! She’s your wife, ain’t she?”
Jessie didn’t wait to hear more. Praying that Adler would be too drunk to come chasing after her, she scrambled to her feet and headed out of the door, the cool night air coming into the room as she did so. A shout caught her ears, but she ran into the night regardless, her feet kicking up the dust as she hurried past the ranch and towards the barn.
Blood roared in her ears as she struggled to make out which horse was her own. A quiet whinny and a slowly dying lantern helped her find her mare, her breathing ragged as she realized the animal wasn’t saddled.
More shouting had her shaking with fright as she tried to climb up onto the horse’s back, struggling with her skirts. She felt weak and tired and yet filled with a deep, unrelenting fear. Taking a deep breath, she tried to find the strength she’d need to pull herself up on the horse’s back. Saddle or not, she’d have to try to get away from the ranch. The horse remained quiet and obliging, not shifting away from her as she tried to throw her leg up and over, finally managing to do it on her ninth attempt. Digging her fingers into the horse’s mane, she pressed her heels into the horse’s side and it moved forward at once, its ears pricked as it walked out of the barn and into the night. The moon was not particularly bright, but it was enough for Jessie to see the way forward. She could still hear laughing and jeering, along with the occasional angry voice, but she didn’t dare linger. Kicking her heels hard against the horse’s sides, she clung on for dear life as the horse began to canter back towards the town.
It was obvious that the animal knew the trail back to town, for it seemed to go on its way quite merrily, leaving Jessie to cling onto the mare with numb fingers. Pain was slicing through her as she rode bareback, her fear the only thing keeping her going. She was sure that, any minute now, she’d hear the sound of horses’ hooves coming up behind her.
“Please,” she whispered, as the mare began to slow, the clouds in the sky covering the moon. “Please, keep going. Find a way. I can’t go back now.”
Unfortunately for her, the mare came to a dead stop, whinnying with obvious fright. Jessie slid from its back, her heart in her mouth, as she heard echoes of shouts coming towards her.
And then, without warning, the mare kicked up its heels and ran off into the night, leaving her by herself in the dark.
“No!” Jessie shouted, before she could stop herself. “No, please!” She stretched one hand out into the inky darkness, as though the mare could hear and understand her and would come back to her at once—only for her to realize that she was entirely alone.
Her whole body hummed with fear, her legs shaking beneath her. She had no idea where to go, terrified that Adler would find her in moments and then drag her back to his house, where some sort of torturous punishment would be waiting for her.
This had been a foolish idea.
And then, suddenly, ripping through the air, came the sound of a gunshot.
Her heart stopped for a moment, one hand going to her mouth as she waited there in the darkness. She had no idea where the sound had come from, how far away it was, and whether or not it had been a warning for her.
She feared that it was.
The shouts and hollers of the men that she’d thought were so close began to drift away from her, making her wonder what exactly was going on. And then, there came the sound of another shot.
For a moment, Jessie felt as though she were about to collapse right where she stood, sinking down into the sand and waiting for her fate. Adler was more terrifying than she had ever expected him to be, and he was using that fear against her even now.
“No.”
The word was whispered from her mouth with no force behind it, but it was more than enough to let a small flame of hope burn in her chest.
“No,” she said again, the whispered sound disappearing into the darkness. “You have to try, Jessie. You have to try.”
Talking to herself seemed to bolster the little courage she had and, almost to encourage her further, the clouds began to drift away from the moon. Without knowing in which direction she was going, Jessie began to take small, slow steps in what she hoped was a straight line, praying that she would find someone or something soon that would indicate she was on the right path. The farm wasn’t too far from town, but the horse had barely made it half a mile before she’d come to a stop. That meant she still had two more miles to walk at least, which would be almost impossible in the darkness unless she knew where she was going.
The sounds of the night began to change. The noise from the hired men and Adler was gone completely now, making her believe that she was headed away from the farm. Her heart was in her throat, the palms of her hands sweaty and her body trembling from anxiety, but still she moved forward. Somewhere, a wolf howled, sending tremors all through her. There had to be a place where she could shelter, somewhere she could hide, even if only for the rest of the night.
The sound of hooves broke the silence, and Jessie cowered in fright. There was nowhere to go, nowhere she could run to. Perhaps, if she just stayed where she was, then the rider might not see her. She didn’t have anything to fight with, no gun or even a rock she could hold in her hand. She was utterly defenseless.
The clouds drifted away from the moon entirely, lighting the cold, dusty plain all about her and, out of the gloom, Jessie saw a dark shadow approaching.
“Whoa, whoa.”
She shrieked, turning around and stumbling back for fear that Adler had come on horseback to find her. Trying to find the strength to run, she felt her legs give way and collapsed forcefully onto the dusty ground. Her fingers clawed at the dirt as she tried to stand and ragged sobs dragged from her chest.
“Who’s there?” a voice said, putting one hand out towards her and catching her arm. “Who is that?”
“Adler?” she whispered, too afraid to turn her head to look at him. “Adler, please, let me go. I haven’t done anything to you.”
“Adler?” the voice repeated, this time sounding puzzled. “I’m not Adler, miss. What are you doing scrabbling about in the dirt like this, out here on your own?”
Slowly, so slowly, Jessie turned her head to look over her shoulder, only just making out the figure of a man crouched beside her. His hand was still on her shoulder, but it wasn’t grasping at her tightly. His voice wasn’t slurred, which meant he wasn’t drunk. Was he one of Adler’s hired men?
“Did Adler send you?” she rasped, pulling herself up to sitting. “Have you come to bring me back to him?”
The man cleared his throat. “Miss, I ain’t got nothing to do with Adler. I’m just asking what you’re doing out here in the middle of the night all on your own. It’s not exactly usual to see a lady out here like this.”
There was something in his voice that told Jessie he was telling her the truth, although she still shrank back from him. She’d learned her lesson once already, having been fooled into marrying a man who’d seemed nothing but kind.
“Why are you out here?” she asked, wrapping her arms about her knees.
He sighed heavily. “This is my ranch,” he replied, getting to his feet. “Or it will be, if you keep on walking for a quarter of a mile or so.”
Jessie frowned, rubbing her forehead with one dirty hand. “Your ranch?” She realized he hadn’t quite answered her question but suddenly felt a small burst of hope. “Might you help me get back to town? I have to get—I have to see Hettie Drummond.”
“Hettie Drummond?” the man repeated, sounding surprised. “What do you want her for? It’s the middle of the night, and she’s bound to be—”
“Please,” Jessie interrupted hoarsely. “I can’t explain why, but I gotta get to her. Please, if there’s any good in you, won’t you help me?” She knew that she was taking a risk asking this stranger to help her, but there was nothing else she could do. If she tried to carry on alone in the dark, she’d get nowhere. If she waited until morning, then Adler might easily find her and take her back to town without warning. She had to get to Hettie now, praying that she’d be willing to help her.