by Jaimi Wilson
He's acting as if I knew he was a wolf the whole time he was with us. Fair enough, I understand not pursuing anything because I was sixteen when we met, but why didn't he ever come back for me?
"Why are you telling me this now? Why not when you left me? All I knew was one day you were there, and the next, you were gone. For a whole week, I kept hoping and praying you would come back and when you didn't, I became angry. All I thought was you had used me to get closer to my mother."
He sighs and leans back in the grass beside me, staring up at the blue sky, the colour a close match to his eyes.
"The night I met your mother, nothing happened between us."
I lay down in the grass beside him, ready to hear what he has to say. Hopefully, some of this is going to start making sense.
"I was supposed to come to your place to meet your mother for, well, sex. We met while in a club, and she invited me back to her place for a little fun. Usually a witch wouldn't satisfy my needs, but I was in need of a pick-me-up and didn't think it would matter. After all, it was only one night. Little did I know, my life was about to change."
I feel him move closer until our arms are brushing together. My heart races a little from the touch, and I instantly hate myself for feeling anything remotely nice towards him.
"When I came into your home, your mother mentioned she was watching a child for the night, but it was okay because you were already in bed. That immediately set off alarm bells in my head. Why would she be okay having me over if she was supposedly looking after a child? Why would she leave a child at home alone to go out on the town?"
He shakes his head, clearly confused by the way my mother’s mind worked. It’s kinda funny because most men were always confused by her behaviour and motives. I was the only one who understood the method to her madness.
None of them understood why she kept me around when she barely looked after me. But I knew it was the money, plain and simple.
I still remember when I walked in on a fight she was having with her 'man of the day' on my ninth birthday. He was yelling about how she was incompetent as a mother and didn't deserve to breed. I didn't understand at the time that he was defending me and questioning the fact my mother left me home alone to care for myself. Not that I minded. I was pretty self-sufficient and was capable of using magic, but I guess I could understand where he was coming from.
"Anyway, I pushed my concerns to the back of mind, the alcohol making me too hazy to care. She started walking me back to her bedroom when we passed your door. I could hear a noise coming from inside, and my wolf made me stop. Do you remember that night?"
I suppress a shudder. I won't ever forget that night. It was the night I first got my period.
My mom had gone out for yet another date or night out, whatever she wanted to call it. I was home alone when it happened, and I had no idea what was going on. I resorted to calling one of the women who used to help take care of me when I was younger, and she walked me through what was happening to my body.
After the call, I showered and climbed into bed before curling up into a ball and crying for hours. The tears only stopped when Benji walked through my bedroom door.
My mother was nowhere in sight, and I assumed it was just another one of her drunk boyfriends thinking he could get a little mother-daughter action. I had summoned my magic, ready to defend myself when he asked, "Are you okay?"
Benji speaks, drawing me out of the memory. "I saw you in there, crying so hard you were having trouble breathing. Your mother, meanwhile, had walked away to the bedroom at the end of the hall and just left the door open as if expecting me to follow her blindly. Your cries sobered me up faster than any coffee would have. I opened your door and saw you trembling but with a fierce determination in your eyes, as if you thought my intentions were shady. This poor sweet girl who was obviously dealing with something, but still had enough iron will that I knew if I got too close, I'd end up with my ass handed to me." He grins over at me, and I roll my eyes.
Okay, so maybe I have anger issues, but he doesn't have to look so smug about it.
"I inhaled the scent of the room, and my wolf urged me closer because he knew what my brain had failed to catch on to. You were my mate. After I had made sure you were okay, I left to go speak with your mother. I knew she was a witch, so I figured she would be understanding about my predicament. That was not the case.
"She tried to seduce me, claiming that since you were underage, it wouldn't matter to you. But to us wolves, our mates are everything. When she finally realized I was serious, she gave me an ultimatum. If I wanted to see you and get to know you, I would have to pay her and keep my second nature from you.
"Usually, I would not let myself be so easily played, but I was twenty-five and had just met my mate. So, over those next six months, I visited you, took you out on things that were date like in nature but not so pushy as to make you feel awkward, and most of all we talked. I got to know you and felt myself falling hard for you. My wolf, however, was becoming unstable. He wanted to claim you, and since you didn't have any idea what I was or who I was to you, I decided to ask your mother’s permission to reveal myself.
"The night I left, it was because the pack called me. A wolf who lost his mate had gone rabid and started attacking humans. Since I was the only tracker we had, I needed to go back and deal with the situation before it got too out of hand.
"I met with your mother the night I flew out and told her that when I came back, I wanted to tell you exactly who you were to me and ask if you would come back to Virginia with me."
He takes a deep breath, and the mood goes from calm to tense in a nanosecond.
"Your mother called me a week later, the same day I was prepping to fly back to you and told me that you wanted nothing to do with me and that if I ever came near you, she would call the Order and claim I was trying to force a mating. Stupidly, I believed her because I thought you were hurt I lied about what I was, especially when I knew exactly what you were. But I thought, eventually, you would feel the pull of the mate bond. I made it clear that I wanted you to know you could come to me at any time if you wanted answers, but that I would respect your wishes and steer clear. And that leads us back to now.”
He smiles over at me and I feel the same skip my heart used to make and curse myself for being so pliable when it comes to Benji.
“When I saw you, I was so surprised, but also fucking elated. I thought you had finally decided to accept the mate bond, right up until the point your hand connected with my cheek." He grins wryly and I can see all is forgiven and he’s just teasing me.
I sit here silently, too stunned to speak. That's an awful lot of information to pile onto me, and while I had begun to calm before, my anger has reignited upon hearing this about my mother. How could she do that to me? I knew she was sick, but holy fucking hell, this is a whole new level of twisted.
For fuck’s sake, she charged my mate just to see me!
Whoa, my mate? Where did that thought come from? Benji remains silent at my side, and I'm grateful because I have no idea how to process that realization.
I had just gotten here and was looking forward to meeting the pack members to see if I could have a mate, only to find out I had one all along.
The thing is, while I now know he didn't exactly leave me, he didn't exactly come back, either. If the mate bond is so strong, how did he stay away from me all this time? Why did he not try and track me down as the years passed? The Order may be a powerful force to reckon with, but I would like to think if the situation was reversed, I would have done anything to make sure my mate was aware I still cared, not just disappear for nine years.
It's safe to say, there's still a lot I have to sort out.
Five
Jasmine
It’s been a week since Benji told me everything that had happened back then. It left my mind in a spin with no idea what my next step should be, so I told him the truth: that I needed time.
Time to process everythin
g that he told me.
Not only that, I needed to figure out what I want in my life and how to get past all the anger that rages inside me.
It’s my own personal monster, and I swear some days, I feel like one day it will take control of me and lash out at the one who tips me over that invisible edge.
No matter how hard I try to ignore the feelings I have for him, I’m still drawn to Benji. The past is clouding my judgement. All I'm thinking about is what we were and what we could be. What I have to consider, though, is the full effect my acceptance of the mating would have. I mean I don't know much about the mating ceremony wolves undergo, and I don’t know if it would be any different because I'm a witch. Then there's the whole ‘I'd be the Alpha's mate’ situation. Does that mean I have to take on a certain amount of responsibility? Would I want to put that kind of thing on my plate?
And my house? Would I be able to keep it, or would I be forced to sell it because I'd have to stay here the rest of my life?
After my third day sulking in my room, Josh stopped by and dragged me out to meet the pack in the hopes that it would cheer me up. He took me to visit a few of the families who were either celebrating a child's birthday or a pregnancy, and I got to see firsthand the love between each wolf and their mates.
Every day after, he stopped by to take me out among the pack so I can learn more about each of them.
The children were schooled on the pack lands until they could shift. The age of that depended on the power of each wolf. A wolf born of an Alpha or Beta line could shift as early as a year old, but most wolves tended to shift between five and seven years old. The day a wolf shifted for the first time was one of celebration among the pack.
I found myself fascinated with the wolf children, and they were equally mesmerized by me. Apparently, the witches before me hadn't taken the time to learn the names of any of the children, much less spend time entertaining and playing with them.
My magic seemed to be a novelty for them, and three little girls–Sara, Katie, and Whitney were their names–found it absolutely amazing when I made flowers dance around them.
The dozen or so little boys would love it when I'd animate the balls they played with. They would shift and chase after them while the parents looked on smiling.
Many of the parents seemed to find it amusing that I was using my powers in such a frivolous way when it would drain my energy. They didn't understand why I would do something with my magic to benefit the children. It made me sad for them, especially when I learned the witches before me had been charging them for the use of their magic.
Simple things like healing and helping sick wolves could have earned them friends among the pack, but yet again, my people show me how badly the Order has poisoned us, clinging to their selfish ways.
If it wasn't for my own upbringing, and seeing how badly that selfishness affected the people around them, I would probably blindly follow the things they ordered, but that's not how I feel.
It’s not like I can come right out and say, 'Hey, I don't like the shit you demand we do. How ‘bout you back the fuck up?’ No, if I did that, I'd be executed for sure, and I like my head where it is, thank you very much.
I sigh and roll out of the bed and stretch. Today is the day I’m going to sit Benji down and talk to him like a real adult. I admit the last few days I've been acting childish rather than like a woman, but fear has been eating at me. I realized last night during a pack bonfire, that there's no need for fear until we're completely upfront about what we want.
For all I know, he doesn't even want this mate bond, and I've been getting myself all messed up over nothing. But then if he doesn't want anything, then I have to find a way to move on and let him go. I can't be some lovesick fool pining away over her first love. I deserve to find happiness even if he doesn't want to be a part of my life.
Ugh, listen to me! I sound like a teenage girl! I hate that he's reduced me to this!
Even though I feel like such an idiot for feeling this way, I know I can't keep avoiding it forever. I also have to determine whether the Order should be aware of this development with my mate.
I plan to contact them soon regarding my mother’s behaviour. Enough is enough. I put up with all her shit growing up, just so she could keep collecting money for her selfish desires. If she is indeed now married, the guy she's married to deserves to know the type of woman he's with. Not only that, but the Order may not be too happy knowing she kept me from a mate when I could have been pumping out wolf pups to help regrow the species. Not that I was actually planning on doing that, but the Order doesn't need to know that.
I walk out into the hall, closing my door behind me. As far as guest quarters go, I feel happy knowing Benji tried to give me the space I needed. He put me at the other end of the pack house and gave me a room with my own adjoining bathroom. It made the transition a little easier, and I didn't feel suffocated.
As I make my way down to the office that I know Benji spends his early morning in, I hear a door slam at the front of the house. I freeze as a man turns down the hall, looking like he's on a mission. When he lifts his head to meet my eyes, my own widen in surprise.
He pauses, and a spark lights up the space between us.
I haven't seen the violet-eyed wolf since the first day I arrived. I thought I felt his presence over the past few days, but when I looked, he was nowhere to be seen.
My breath escapes me in a small gasp as he takes a step forward, breaking the moment. Within seconds, he's within touching distance and reaches a hand out, lifting my chin and claiming my lips in a spine-tingling kiss that leaves me surprised and breathless. Before I can react, however, it’s over.
"My name is Liam Sage, and I'm officially claiming you as my mate."
WHAT THE FUCK?
I throw my hands up, my initial shock immediately replaced with anger. "What is wrong with you wolves? Do you think this is some kind of sick game you can play on me?!"
My shouting draws someone’s attention and I hear the sound of footsteps. Benji comes marching out of his office and sees our proximity and the way I'm standing, ready to kick a wolf between the balls.
He looks between the two of us before his gaze settles on my violet-eyed wolf, Liam "What are you doing in here? You're upsetting my mate!"
I roll my eyes and glare over at Benji before pointing back at Liam accusingly. "This wolf just kissed me and told me he was claiming me officially as his mate. That's what's going on here! So tell me, Benji, which one of you two is lying to me, huh?!"
I push past both men, my shoulders bruised instantly by the impact against their rock hard arms. It felt like smashing my shoulders into solid bricks. Stupid fit men. Why couldn't they be all soft like marshmallows? I push a little magic into my shoulders and feel the pain ease instantly. With that I continue, storming into the dining room.
I pace back and forth, with my eyes on the floor, waiting for them to follow after me and offer up some kind of explanation. I feel both of their presences when they enter the room, but they remain silent. I finally snap, unable to take it anymore.
My anger is directed at Benji first, my heart breaking all over again. This is exactly what I didn't want!
"You told me I was your mate, Benji! You gave me this bullshit story about why you left and how much you cared about me! And you," I growl, turning my ire on Liam. "Where do you get off kissing me out of nowhere and then claiming me as your mate? You haven't said two words to me since I got here, but you thought it was okay to just waltz right up and kiss me?! I don't even know you! If I wanted to, I could have killed you!"
I close my eyes, taking deep breaths to calm the swirling magic inside me. After a moment, I opened my eyes to stare at both of them, my magic a little steadier.
I speak calmly, knowing if I get worked up, I may not get the answers I need. "I may not know much about wolves, but I know they only have one mate. ONE! So, tell me the truth, is one of you actually my mate, or is this some sick twisted game you t
wo cooked up to fuck with me? I want you to be warned, if either one of you lies to me, I will use my magic to curse you for all eternity!"
I won't actually use my magic to curse them. I'm not that dark, but I will use it to get to the truth. I weave my magic around them, keeping it light, so they don't sense its presence. It won't harm them, but it will assure nothing but the truth can pass their lips.
If they lie to me, however, their bodies will spasm as if being tasered.
Benji takes a step close to me, holding out his hands in a passive manner. "Jazzy, please believe me. I am your mate. I wouldn't lie to you about something so sacred."
I nod, and my heart is relieved that he didn't trick me. If he had lied, I doubt I would have been able to handle it.
I turn my gaze to Liam who looks confused by the whole situation. He nods slowly. "I, too, am your mate. I don't know how this could have happened, but I swear to you I speak the truth."
My eyes dart between Benji and Liam, utterly confused. Neither of them lied, yet they both say they're my mate. I shake my head adamantly. "No, that's not possible. How did you do it? How did you both work around my magic?"
Benji smirks, "If you used a truth spell on us, Jazzy, then you know we didn't lie. As strange as it sounds, we must both be your mates."
I stagger back a step, feeling oddly faint. Why did this happen to me? I swear when I meet whatever fates are out there, I'll be giving them a piece of my mind!
Six
Jasmine
Benji had helped me sit down because I was having a little trouble staying up without swaying.
I'm sitting on one side with the two of them opposite me, their hands on the table as if it would make me more comfortable somehow.