Out came Stardust! Narrowly missed by two blazing beams, nearly swallowed in clouds of white smoke and billows of yellow fire! The stuntman, dressed in lady’s riding garb, was leaning on the neck and holding on in earnest. Stardust plunged, affected to rear at the two extras, who now blazed away with their two arquebuses, and fled off down the road at a fast run! Arrows and crossbow boltsthunked in her wake. She vanished far up the lane. The director called “Break!”
Next followed three shots, done on another set, of the now somewhat singed Stardust plunging and rearing in a mock interior. She had to break down a burning door in here, too. At eleven o’clock the work was finished. And, mounted on a real horse, Veronica Morris was ready to follow through with the close-ups. Mr. Butler was due to “perish” tomorrow. So today he could look on.
Gadget, having lunched with the director and chief cameraman, receiving plaudits all around for his remarkable horse, was now free to return to his laboratory and do what he considered more important work.
As Gadget and Tony were backing Stardust up to the horse trailer, they had one slight encounter with the SPCA representative who wanted to examine the “injuries sustained by the horse in that last scene.” In the end, the man, who turned out to be quite a nice fellow after all, was their most appreciative audience. He just couldn’t get over it. They let him examine a couple of the bolts down the throat, and unscrew a couple of teeth. “You are a genius, my boy,” he said. “You are a genius. You should have proper recognition. Why, there are museums all over the country—”
“Oh, no,” Gadget said hurriedly, “I could never do it again. It was just a fluke.”
They finally escaped from the terrible prospect of the very unprofitable “proper recognition.” “That was a narrow one,” said Gadget as the man walked away. “If we ever got ‘recognition’ we wouldn’t make enough to fly to Canada, much less the moon.”
They loaded the scorched Stardust into the trailer and they wheeled on home.
Miss Franklin was waiting for them. She had, gripped in her hand, a green slip of paper which she had obviously been holding half of the morning in anticipation of their return. Gadget took one look at it and knew what it was: the twenty-five hundred and twenty dollar kickback from the racing museum, twenty-eight hundred dollars minus ten percent.
“Now don’t tell me this is a personal debt,” said Miss Franklin in a silky voice. “The boy told me that he was to give it only to Gadget O’Dowd.”
“Then how did you get it?” said Gadget.
Tony looked mournfully at a torn-up flower bed. “Boss, she can wrastle, too.”
“That skin the racing museum gave your mechanic can go right back to them. It will cost me a whole lot less than twenty-eight hundred dollars to have it restuffed. It looks to me, Mr. O’Dowd, like you didn’t need any such budget. This makes you exactly two thousand and five hundred and twenty dollars under your estimate.”
Gadget looked at her and sighed deeply. He went into his own office and slammed the door.
The following morning bright and early Cliff’s trainer, Hank, drove up with a horse trailer which made the rental job look like something off a salvage pile. His men opened the door of this glittering creation invitingly. Hank went into the office to find Mr. O’Dowd. Fortunately Miss Franklin considered her office hours to be from nine to five. Movie people are ordinarily up long before that.
“Well, well,” said Hank, “here I am.”
“Well, well,” said Gadget, “I see you are.”
“Shall we load the horse aboard now?”
“Well, you see,” said Gadget, “I’ve been thinking this thing over rather carefully and I’ve decided—”
“You’re not going to back out on the deal now!” said Hank.
“Well,” said Gadget, “I was thinking—”
“Mr. O’Dowd,” said Hank, “you look to me like a man of your word. You wouldn’t go back on Mr. Neary, would you? He could do you a lot of good.”
“That isn’t all he could do to him,” said Angus under his breath.
Gadget was thinking fast. If he confessed this sin he would certainly have to refund Cliff’s losses. But if he didn’t, then he would have to give Cliff the horse. Due to his disturbed state of mind because of the twenty-five hundred and twenty dollar hole in the budget, he had not come up with the brilliant idea of which he had thought himself capable.
“Where is the horse?” said Hank suspiciously. “She’s all right, isn’t she?”
Gadget was about to report the theft of Stardust when one of the men spotted her in the bar. “Funny place to keep a horse,” said Hank. “I hope she doesn’t drink! Well, shall we load up?”
“She looks kind of singed,” said one of the men. “What happened?”
“Nothing serious,” said Gadget. “Nothing serious at all.”
“Funny look about that horse,” said the other man.
“Well, she’s just a little bit off her feed today. All that running didn’t help her any. Tony, we are being very remiss in our hospitality. Take these gentlemen inside and give them something to eat or drink.”
“I got a fresh cup a coffee if you want some,” Tony said.
“You go ahead too, Hank. I’ll put her in the trailer,” Gadget said.
Tony hustled them inside, and Gadget loaded Stardust on board the super-deluxe horse trailer. When they came out again Hank saw Stardust’s ears above the trailer side, handed Gadget the check from Mr. Neary and they agreed to sign all the necessary papers on Saturday morning. Hands were shaken all around and soon the yard was deserted.
Ten seconds later Miss Franklin drove on the scene.
“What was that horse trailer?” she demanded.
The smile which Gadget had worn at the departure now vanished. “Well, you see, that Stardust—”
“You mean you’ve let somebody else have a piece of property belonging to United Pictures? You must realize that there is a lot of valuable equipment in there that can be salvaged,” said Miss Franklin primly. “You’ve already exceeded your—”
“D’ye mean to say that we’ve got to go to all the toil of taking that horse apart?” said Angus, coming belatedly to work.
“I mean just that,” said Miss Franklin. “We’ll restore that hide to the museum and put all the various parts on the inventory.” She went into her office and could be heard arranging things for her day.
Gadget looked at Angus. “Bring the control box out,” he said.
Angus was in no mood to be lightly ordered about, but he went. “Dismantlin’ a horse!” he was snorting. “Filing parts! Inventory! What the movie business isna comin’ to would— What in the saintly name has happened to this control box?” He came back out, his basic anger building. “Musther O’Dowd! Some scut has unsoldered—!”
“Give it here,” said Gadget hastily. “I was in a hurry. I didn’t know when they’d look at me. Give me that box!”
Miss Franklin, curious as to what was going on out in the court, issued from her office, aggressive as an overdue bill. “What are you doing?” she demanded. “When the front office learns—”
Suddenly a roaring whine resounded in the sky. Looking up, a terrified Miss Franklin beheld a horse! It had been rising ever since the trailer had begun to move, having issued straight up, and now it had a very, very long way to come down.
Miss Franklin screamed! Stardust was falling faster now, falling with the gathering speed of a blockbuster, falling so fast that the air was split and scorched.
Down came Stardust from its suspended station. Down came Stardust getting bigger and bigger, louder and louder. Down came Stardust with a crash!
Dust shot away! Hoofs and hide contracted, seemed buried in the earth, and then bounced with a geyser of wheels, cogs, tubes, rheostats and useless condensers. Up went the electronic shower, down came distended rods and shattered bric-a-brac, mingled with spattering, twisted pieces of torn hide.
Stillness came. A radar eye rolled pathetically t
o Gadget’s feet and lay there, teetering, looking at him accusatively. The dust settled, slowly, quietly, and much of it upon a cowering Miss Franklin whose disarrayed nerves were almost as damaged as the late and unlamented automagic horse.
“Gravity repulsor,” said Gadget O’Dowd. “Installed it at the last minute in a streak of proud genius. Works fine, doesn’t it, Angus?” He looked benignly at Miss Franklin. “Gravity repulsor, installed to conduct a scientific experiment in the interests of the future safety of stuntmen. Solder seems to have broken so that I couldn’t slow it down.”
“What . . . what happened?” said Miss Franklin.
“Why,” said Gadget, “in the interest of picture research, we installed a gravity repulsor which lifted Stardust out of the trailer and deposited her back here where she belongs. And I think you will find that this experiment cost exactly twenty-five hundred and twenty dollars to conduct, including the cost of the gravity repulsor unit, of course.” He looked brightly at the scattered remains which were strewn widely across the flower beds.
Miss Franklin gulped, looked at Gadget with baffled but dawning respect and then took her tired way into her office.
“Loddie,” said Angus, “’tis a great project on which we’re embarked. But I’m thinkin’ if ye keep this up ye’ll find it necessary to go to the moon—aye, and a divil of a lot farther before we’re done.”
“Boss,” said the worshipful Tony, “that sure was a bang-up solution to dat problem!”
Gadget reached into his jacket pocket and brought out the purchase checks which Mr. Neary had given him for the sale of Stardust. He handed them to Tony. “This hurts me more than I can say, but one must be honest after all. Take them over to Mr. Neary and tell him how sorry we are that his new horse ran away. Tell him it was a bad habit she had anyway.”
“Give him back fifty G’s?” gaped Tony.
“My boy,” said Gadget, “you have evidently forgotten how much money we made off him on the bets. My conscience,” he added, with a bright, self-denying smile, “wouldn’t permit me to keep his checks for a horse he never owned.”
“Your conscience,” said Tony, with disgust, “is the most expensive thing we got!” He pulled on his gloves, took the money and drove away.
In the dark of night another mile of tunnel to a “gamma room” was started into the Hollywood Hills. And enough metal for a spaceship’s bow was smuggled, the very next day, straight under the vigilant nose of Miss Franklin.
Gadget and Angus and Tony were that much closer to the moon. “I hope humanity appreciates the trouble we’ve gone to for it,” said Gadget. But there was so much noise around the busy forge that Angus and Tony didn’t even hear him.
Glossary
STORIES FROM THE GOLDEN AGE reflect the words and expressions used in the 1930s and 1940s, adding unique flavor and authenticity to the tales. While a character’s speech may often reflect regional origins, it also can convey attitudes common in the day. So that readers can better grasp such cultural and historical terms, uncommon words or expressions of the era, the following glossary has been provided.
ad astra per aspera: (Latin) to the stars through difficulties.
Aida: the name of a popular Italian opera composed by Giuseppe Verdi and one of the most performed operas in North America.
alpha: the first one; the beginning.
Andes: a mountain range that extends the length of the western coast of South America.
arquebuses: heavy portable guns with a trigger mechanism that ignites the powder with a slow-burning fuse. They were invented during the fifteenth century.
astrography: the art of describing or delineating the stars; a description or mapping of the heavens.
batteries: groups of large-caliber weapons used for combined action.
Bell Telephone: the original Bell Telephone Company was founded in 1878 by Alexander Graham Bell’s father-in-law. It later merged with other companies to eventually become what is known today as the American Telephone & Telegraph Company (AT&T).
Blarney stone: a stone set in the wall below the battlements of the Blarney Castle, a medieval stronghold in Ireland. It is said to bestow the gift of eloquence, the art of using language well and convincingly, to anyone who kisses it.
blockbuster: a high-explosive bomb designed to demolish buildings over a large area.
bolts: short arrows for use with a crossbow.
boomp girls: Hollywood starlets.
buckjumping: moving in sudden jerks; lurching.
bucko officers: officers of a ship who drive their crew by the power of their fists.
bully-boy: fine; excellent or splendid man.
cakewalked: walked with a high prance with a backward tilt.
champ: to make biting or gnashing movements.
cheerio: (chiefly British) usually used as a farewell.
chewed and hewed: pondered and came to an agreement.
chews: pieces of dried tobacco for chewing.
confederated: brought into an alliance.
cuspidor: a large bowl, often of metal, serving as a receptacle for spit, especially from chewing tobacco, in wide use during the nineteenth and early twentieth centuries.
drifting: making a horizontal passageway or tunnel in a rock layer.
ease her: nautical term used to order the steersman to reduce the amount of steerage during a turn. Usually given as an order as the ship approaches the desired course. The term originated during the days of sailing ships and her referred to the rudder.
flips: a class of mixed drinks with egg as a defining feature. The most commonly known flip is eggnog. A basic flip calls for a base spirit, such as brandy or rum, egg, sugar, cream and nutmeg.
furlong: a measure of distance equal to 220 yards.
gamma rays: very penetrating rays emitted by radioactive substances.
Garand rifle: a semiautomatic rifle named after designer John Garand (1888–1974).
geldings: male horses that have been castrated.
Ghost Rider, The: a movie from 1935 about a deputy who cleans up a town with the assistance of a ghost.
Goldwyn, Samuel: (1879–1974) Hollywood independent motion picture producer who had an instrumental role in the formation of the two largest Hollywood studios, Paramount Pictures and Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer.
high road: the surest or best approach.
Horch phaeton: the make and model of a late 1930s high-performance luxury car manufactured in Germany by the Horch Company. The Horch phaeton was a large open automobile with a folding top, seating five or more passengers. August Horch, one of the pioneering figures of Germany’s automotive industry, established a line of cars that was known for elegance, luxury and superlative standards in automotive construction. Production of Horch automobiles ceased when World War II began.
hostlers: people who are employed to tend horses.
Huguenot: French Christians who broke away from the Catholic Church in the seventeenth century. They wore eccentric, richly colored clothes.
ken: (Scottish) know, have knowledge of.
kingpin: a main or large bolt in a central position.
Lamarr, Hedy: (1913–2000) a famous Austrian-born American actress known primarily for her great beauty.
lookout: a problem or concern.
Lost Tribe, The: a movie produced by Columbia Pictures in 1949 as the second installment of the “Jungle Jim” series, a comic-strip adventure. The hero of the story, Jungle Jim, helps to drive off white men’s efforts to find and take
the riches from a tribe hidden in the African wilds.
manganese steel: steel containing manganese (a hard gray metallic element), an alloy invented by Sir Robert Hadfield in 1882, which increases the depth of hardening in the steel, and improves the strength and toughness. This metal can still be shaped when cold without fracture, and once fully hardened, has unusual shock-resistant properties.
Man o’ War: a horse, considered by many to be the greatest US thoroughbred racehorse of all time.
man-o’-war: a warship; combat ship.
meet her: nautical term used to order the steersman to turn in the opposite direction in order to check or stop a ship’s swing. The term originated during the days of sailing ships and her referred to the rudder.
Moloch: a god to whom children were sacrificed. It was depicted as a man with the head of a bull.
Pitts, ZaSu: (1894–1963) a famous American film actress who appeared in hundreds of movies from 1917 until 1963.
plate: in printing or photography, an image or copy.
quirt: a riding whip with a short handle and a braided leather lash.
RCA: Radio Corporation of America; a privately owned radio broadcasting corporation formed in 1919.
rococo: showy.
rooftree: ridgepole; a long beam of wood that runs along the ridge of a roof, and to which the upper ends of the rafters are attached.
Santa Anita: Santa Anita Park; a thoroughbred race track in California known for offering some of the prominent horse racing events in the United States.
scurvy: a disease caused by a deficiency of vitamin C, characterized by bleeding gums and the opening of previously healed wounds.
scut: a worthless contemptible person.
Shantung: a peninsula in east China extending into the Yellow Sea.
skinflint: one who is very reluctant to spend money; a miser.
snagger: a jagged hole, tear or pull.
The Scifi & Fantasy Collection Page 35