Antiques Ravin'
Page 21
So I said, “What’s up, doc?”
“Shows, does it?”
“Yep.”
“Here I thought I had a pretty good poker face.”
I asked the dreaded question. “Is it us?”
“What? No. No.”
Had another mob contract been taken out on him? Was there some other wife in his past he hadn’t told me about?
“Work?” I asked.
“Well, there’s always that, but . . . no.”
That left only Mother.
He reclaimed his arm, twisted toward me. “There’s an inquiry that Vivian will have to face.”
“About what?”
“Some of her actions—or inactions—in Antiqua.”
“For instance?”
He sighed. “Not calling the FBI immediately when evidence indicated that Mayor Hatcher had been kidnapped.”
“But he wasn’t kidnapped,” I pointed out.
“This is procedure I’m talking about,” Tony replied. “Whether or not the man really was kidnapped is moot. She also failed to instruct forensics to go over the mayor’s car.”
Mother had skipped that step, true enough. “What else?”
“She didn’t have the authority to go outside regular law enforcement channels and involve the Sauk Nation, who were in another county.”
I said defensively, “If she hadn’t called them, Pastor Creed would have died.”
“We don’t know that. Now Serenity County is going to have to reimburse the tribe, which won’t be cheap. And there’s more.”
This was starting to sound like a terrible infomercial.
He was saying, “I needn’t remind you her driver’s license was revoked long ago. So there’s the little matter of her driving to the casino by herself, which showed up on the parking lot security cam.”
I sighed. “I knew about that.”
“Did you also know that she won over a hundred thousand dollars on that visit?”
“What? No!”
He was nodding. “Of course, she’s donating it to the Sauk health clinic, but still . . . Vivian was gambling while acting at the time in a law enforcement capacity.”
I sighed. “Anything else?”
“Well, there were no eyewitnesses, so it can’t be proved, but . . .”
“But what?”
“Three farm mailboxes were casualties along the highway to the casino.”
“That does sound like Mother,” I admitted.
“And she owes the Antiqua city hall a new chalkboard. I realize she would have returned it, if that train hadn’t hit your lodgings. Still.”
“Please tell me you’re finished.”
“Not quite. There’s a matter of a dozen complementary cartons of TAB soft drink being delivered to her at the Sheriff’s Department from the Coca-Cola Company. When I heard about that, I told her that accepting any gifts could be seen as a bribe.”
“And what did she say?”
“Put it on my tab.”
I laughed despite myself.
But then suddenly it didn’t seem so funny. “Were you the one who . . . ?”
Tony looked hurt. “Ratted her out? No, Brandy. This inquiry came about because of the report she filed, in which she detailed her own actions.”
“Oh. Well, at least she’s honest about it all.”
“More like proud. She’s almost certainly going to be called to come before the county commissioner, who will assess her actions and decide if any laws have been broken. If that results in a hearing, I could have to testify about what I know.”
I sighed. “I understand.”
He took my hand. Squeezed gently. “I just wanted you to know what’s coming at you.”
“I guess it’s better than a train,” I said. Then I brightened. “Hey, if she has to resign or whatever, I’m perfectly fine with that.”
“You are?”
“Sure.” I put my head on his shoulder. “And she loves doing jail time—between research and forming drama groups, that’s like a vacation to her. Anyway, if she’s not sheriff anymore, my life will be a whole lot better.”
Or would it?
To be continued . . .
A Trash ’n’ Treasures Tip
Shady book dealers will make a photo of a book too light in order to hide ageing or discoloration, or too dark to make defects invisible. Which Mother abhors where books are concerned, but she considers it a good practice for women of a certain age getting their pictures taken.
Photo by Bamford Studio
BARBARA ALLAN is a joint pseudonym of husband-and-wife mystery writers Barbara and Max Allan Collins.
BARBARA COLLINS is a highly respected short story writer in the mystery field, with appearances in over a dozen top anthologies, including Murder Most Delicious, Women on the Edge, Deadly Housewives, and the best-selling Cat Crimes series. She was the co-editor of (and a contributor to) the best-selling anthology Lethal Ladies, and her stories were selected for inclusion in the first three volumes of The Year’s 25 Finest Crime and Mystery Stories.
Two acclaimed hardcover collections of her work have been published: Too Many Tomcats and (with her husband) Murder—His and Hers. The Collins’s first novel together, the Baby Boomer thriller Regeneration, was a paperback bestseller; their second collaborative novel, Bombshell—in which Marilyn Monroe saves the world from World War III—was published in hardcover to excellent reviews. Both are back in print under the “Barbara Allan” byline.
Barbara has been the production manager and/or line producer on various independent film projects emanating from the production company she and her husband jointly run.
MAX ALLAN COLLINS in 2017 was named a Mystery Writers of America Grand Master. He has earned an unprecedented twenty-three Private Eye of America “Shamus” nominations, winning two Best Novel awards for his Nathan Heller historical thrillers, True Detective (1983), and Stolen Away (1991), and Best Short Story for his Mike Hammer story, “So Long Chief” (2014), completing an unfinished work by Mickey Spillane. His other credits include film criticism, short fiction, songwriting, trading-card sets, and movie/TV tie-in novels, including the New York Times best-sellers Saving Private Ryan and the Scribe Award–winning American Gangster. His graphic novel Road to Perdition, considered a classic of the form, is the basis of the Academy Award–winning film. Max’s other comics credits include the “Dick Tracy” syndicated strip; his own “Ms. Tree”; “Batman”; and “CSI: Crime Scene Investigation,” based on the hit TV series, for which he has also written six video games and ten best-selling novels.
An acclaimed, award-winning filmmaker in the Midwest, he wrote and directed the Lifetime movie Mommy (1996) and three other features; his produced screenplays include the 1995 HBO World Premiere The Expert and The Last Lullaby (2008). His 1998 documentary Mike Hammer’s Mickey Spillane appears on the Criterion Collection release of the acclaimed film noir Kiss Me Deadly. The recent Cinemax TV series Quarry is based on his innovative book series.
Max’s most current novels include two works begun by his mentor, the late mystery-writing legend Mickey Spillane: The Will to Kill (with Mike Hammer) and The Legend of Caleb York, the first western credit for both Spillane and Collins.
“BARBARA ALLAN” live(s) in Muscatine, Iowa, their Serenity-esque hometown. Son Nathan works as a translator of Japanese to English, with credits ranging from video games to novels.