by Lori Foster
Secrets and her injury forgotten, Sadie gasped. “Could we, Dad? Please?”
“Sure, why not? I’m curious to see the farm.”
Squealing, Sadie bounced in her dad’s lap. “Could I see the pigs, Matilda and Olivia?”
“They would love that. They’re always excited for company.”
“And the goat, Delilah, and the sheep, Franklin?”
Delighted, Autumn laughed. “You remember them all!”
Walking into the conversation blind, Ember said, “Wow, did this squirt just name four of our critters? I’m impressed!” She offered her palm to Sadie. “Give me five.”
Grinning from ear to ear, Sadie smacked her palm.
It relieved Autumn to see the tension easing from Tash’s shoulders. “Ember’s amazed because she sometimes forgets their names.”
“That’s because Autumn always gets to name them.” She dropped down to sit by Sadie and said, sotto voce, “She sneaks and gives them names before I even have a chance to think about it.” As if inspired, Ember turned back to her. “You know what? We should let Sadie name the turkey.”
“What an excellent idea!” Loving the excitement on Sadie’s face, she explained, “We just rescued a turkey. Poor baby has a broken wing, but our super-amazing vet will get him all fixed up. Once we get him to the farm, you could meet him and decide what he should be called.”
“We could name him after Dad.”
Autumn choked. Ember laughed outright.
“Tash the turkey?” Happy to play along, Tash gave Sadie a squeeze and said with haughty dignity, “I’m honored.”
God love the man, just how incredible was he? He took Sadie’s confession on the chin, rolled with the punches and kept on teasing—all for Sadie. Autumn had the feeling he’d do just about anything to keep the shadows out of his daughter’s eyes.
More than his gorgeous bod and handsome face, more than his easy presence and friendly manner, his potent dad-mode made her heart pound in a demented beat.
When Sadie’s giggling subsided, he announced, “It’s time for us to head home. By the time you get that bubble bath, it’ll be past even my bedtime.”
“Mine, too,” Autumn said with a big and not entirely feigned yawn.
Ember and Sadie called them party poopers as Tash stepped into his shoes and gathered up their stuff. Autumn automatically pitched in.
Sadie started to stand, but Tash said, “I’ll carry you, okay?”
“Dad,” she complained, looking around to make sure no one had heard him. “I can walk.”
“You’ve got me convinced you can do anything you put your mind to, but I don’t want your foot getting dirty.”
Autumn cut the debate short by saying, “I’ll help Tash get this stuff in his car.” She wanted a moment to talk privately with him, anyway. “Ember, you’ll wait with Sadie?”
“We’ll talk about the playground and everything she might want,” Ember promised, shooing them away. “Take your time.”
Tash seemed distracted as they headed to his car. One step behind him, Autumn took in his squared shoulders, stiff with tension...which just naturally led to her looking over the rest of him, too. Firm flesh stretched taut over long bones and masculine angles, emphasizing his innate physical strength.
After what she’d just seen, she knew he had emotional strength in spades, as well.
Biding her time until they were far enough away that no one could hear, she trailed behind him...until he suddenly stopped and looked back. “Damn, I’m sorry.” He held out a hand. “Didn’t mean to leave you behind.”
“You have a few things on your mind.” When she reached him, his hand went to the small of her back and drew her alongside him. “Are you okay?”
“Furious,” he answered, his tone low. “Fucking heartbroken.” As if she hadn’t been there to hear it, or maybe to convince himself it was real, he said, “Her mother had her keep secrets from me. My baby had stitches and I didn’t know it. Worse, she had some boyfriend do it. Jesus.”
Knowing he was hurting, Autumn leaned into him. Words didn’t come to her, so instead she offered touch.
“I want to ask her questions. I want—need—to know it all. Any other secrets. Any other injuries. But I don’t want to pressure her to talk.”
“She’s opening up little by little, right?” As Sadie adjusted, she’d talk more. Autumn felt sure of that. “You did great with her.”
“If Deb was here, I could demand answers. Obviously I should have done more of that when she was alive. I just never imagined...” He cursed low. “If she didn’t go to the doctor, how did this random guy even numb her finger?”
“Don’t torture yourself,” she advised, rubbing his arm. “She’s with you now, safe and happy.”
His laugh held no humor. “Is she happy? I hope so, but sometimes it’s hard to tell.”
They reached his car, so she waited while he opened the back of the dark SUV.
After he loaded everything inside, he leaned against the fender. The bright moon overhead highlighted his face in heavy shadows, but Autumn could guess at his expression.
She stepped closer. “Little by little, Tash. You’re giving her stability, security and love. The rest will come.”
Taking her by surprise, he looped his arms around her waist and drew her against him. With his chin to the top of her head, he whispered, “Thank you for reminding me. I will make it all right. Just might take longer than I’d like.”
Total shutdown. Good Lord, Tash had her snuggled up against his solid body in a cozy embrace and she couldn’t think. Couldn’t reply.
Could barely even breathe.
She did manage a nod, which meant she bumped her head into his chin, making him pull back.
Laughing, he used the edge of a loose fist to tip up her face. “You maneuver through all this so seamlessly. I know you brought up the visit to the farm to give me a second, and I appreciate it.”
Another nod felt inadequate, but seriously, she was acutely aware of every firm inch of his long, hot body...and then she remembered she hadn’t worn a bra. Her mouth opened, but that’s as far as she got.
What could she say? Sorry, but I’m afraid you might be able to feel my nipples? Yup, they were at attention, big-time.
Pretty sure her ovaries were, too.
“You are so cute.” Casual as you please, Tash bent and put a soft, lingering kiss to her temple. “Cute, and a blessing.”
A blessing. Right. That’s what this was about. The man had just suffered awful revelations about his daughter and she’d worked as a buffer. Under the circumstances, he’d be equally grateful to Ember, or even Mike.
Probably wouldn’t hug and kiss Mike, though. Pretty sure Mike’s nipples wouldn’t be a problem.
Her thoughts were still scrambling around when he released her, engulfed her hand in his and started back to his daughter.
Just like they were a couple or something.
Now she didn’t know what to think, but whatever. She liked it, even though he freed her before Sadie and Ember came into view.
Tomorrow would be a work-heavy day at the farm, but with their visit planned, she already looked forward to it.
* * *
Closing the book he’d just finished reading, Tash looked down at Sadie. Snuggled under his right arm, she smelled sweet and clean, her hair freshly braided and her injured foot sporting a clean bandage. Brown eyelashes rested low on her sleepy eyes.
He loved times like this, when she was warm and sweet, all her defenses down, cuddled close and feeling secure. With a kiss to her forehead, he said, “Time to sleep, honey.”
After a lusty yawn, she looked up at him. “You lookin’ forward to seein’ the farm, Dad?”
“I am.” Mostly he looked forward to her happiness. “How about you?”
“I can’t w
ait. I hope Matilda and Olivia like me.”
“I think they’ll adore you, just like I do.”
Far too grave for a child her age, she said, “Thanks for readin’ to me.”
The seriousness in her big blue eyes nudged a smile onto his mouth. “You look very cross about it.”
Narrow shoulders lifted. “Just thinkin’.”
It was their special time, something he’d started when she was too young to understand. Whenever he had her overnight, which granted, wasn’t as often as he’d have liked, he always had a new book to read to her.
“I love reading to you. In fact, I was thinking we should get a few new books soon.”
After a weighty pause she said, “Mom didn’t like to read.”
The disclosure surprised him. Trying to keep it light, he set aside the book and smiled. “What was your bedtime routine at home?”
“I’d sometimes watch TV. I had a TV in my room.” Pensive, she heaved a sigh. “Mom told me to leave it on while I slept.”
Maybe to drown out other noises? It didn’t matter, not anymore. As Autumn had said, he had her now and he’d make her life as secure as possible. “Did you want a TV in your room here?”
“No.” She bit her lip. “I mean, I’d rather you read to me.”
Tash gave her a squeeze. “I prefer that, too.”
Toying with a loose thread on her stuffed monkey, she asked, “Do you like Autumn?”
“Sure. Don’t you?”
“I didn’t like Mom’s boyfriends.”
His heart tripped, though he tried to hide it. “How come?”
Another shrug, meaning she wasn’t ready to go there yet. Little by little, he reminded himself. Grilling her for info wasn’t the way.
“If you don’t like Autumn—” he ventured, hoping that wasn’t the case, since he more than liked her.
“I do,” she interrupted fast. Turning to face him, her gaze pointed and serious, she stated, “I like her lots.”
Fantastic. “Me, too.”
“Mom wouldn’t have liked her.”
She blurted that out, then waited for his reaction.
Knowing this was important, Tash gave himself a second to think.
For whatever reason, Sadie had chosen tonight to open up. Perhaps because of his reaction to her injury? Maybe discovering that it was okay to tell a secret had reassured her. He hoped so.
Keeping his expression and tone impassive, he asked, “Why do you think that, honey?”
“She said you liked other women and they were all nasty.” Falling quiet for a moment, Sadie screwed her mouth from one side to the other, then reluctantly added, “She said you didn’t care about us.”
Pain cut through him, but he swallowed hard and forced a small smile. “I love you more than anything in the whole world. I always have.”
Scrunching up her face, Sadie whispered, “I think she didn’t care about us.”
“That’s not true, honey. Your mother loved you, it’s just that she was sometimes...unwell.”
Throwing her thin arms around him, Sadie said against his shoulder, “I’m sorry I kept secrets.”
Emotion put a death grip on him. Cradling her close, Tash sat up and pulled her onto his lap. For a minute or so, he just rocked her, words lodged in his throat. Finally, still hugging her, he managed to say, “I want you to listen to me real close, okay, baby?”
She nodded without raising her head.
With his heart full to bursting, and his voice a little raw, he said, “You can tell me anything. I’m your daddy and I will always love you, no matter what.”
He heard her swallow, and she whispered, “You might get angry.”
“Never, ever at you.” He rethought that, because damn it, he was human, so he corrected himself. “Even if I sound angry, even if you did something you shouldn’t, it won’t make me stop loving you. Nothing could do that, okay?”
She wiped her eyes against his T-shirt and nodded. “I sometimes mess up.”
“Me, too. But we’re in this together, right? This is our home and I want you to be as happy about that as I am. Sometimes, if I’ve had a long day, I might be grouchy. Maybe if you didn’t get enough sleep, you might be grouchy. No one is perfect, right? But I’ll still love you, and you’ll still love me, and we’ll muddle through one way or another.”
For several heart-stopping moments, Sadie seemed to think about it. To his relief she finally nodded again. “Okay.”
“Okay.”
“Autumn’s not like Mom, is she?”
One blow after another. Unsure of how Sadie meant that, Tash said, “Autumn is unlike any other person I’ve known.”
“I wouldn’t mind if she was your girlfriend.”
That precious attitude made him laugh softly. “Well, I might not mind that, either, but Autumn has something to say about it.”
With complete authority, Sadie stated, “She likes you.”
“You think so?”
“’Course she does. Everyone likes you.”
Deb hadn’t... But he kept that thought to himself. “I know for a fact Autumn likes you.” He playfully tapped the tip of her nose. “She told me so.”
Her beatific smile squeezed his heart. “Do you think she’d do dinner with us again?”
“I’ll ask her,” he promised.
She gave him another tight hug. “Love you, Dad.”
“I love you more.” He turned and settled her in the bed, pulling the sheet and blanket up and over her shoulders, making sure he tucked in her stuffed monkey, too. “Get to sleep, okay? We have a busy day tomorrow.”
“Seein’ the animals.” She snuggled her monkey up close and turned to her side to burrow into the pillow. “G’night, Dad.”
“’Night, baby.” With a final kiss to her forehead, Tash turned out the light and slipped from the room. Per Sadie’s preference, he left her door open, so it wasn’t until he’d gone into his own room that he dropped back against the wall, his hands fisted, his eyes damp.
Progress. Finally Sadie had opened up to him, trusted him. He felt like he’d conquered something monumental and he had the urge to call Autumn and tell her about it. He wouldn’t, of course.
He could wait until tomorrow.
His mouth curved. For entirely different reasons from Sadie’s, he was every bit as excited about the visit.
* * *
Ember got up extra early on Sunday morning after promising Autumn she could sleep in a bit. Fair—after all, she’d kept her out last night, so she owed it to her.
Owing her wasn’t the only motivation, though. Beneath the angst of Sadie’s injury, she’d felt the undercurrents between Tash and Autumn. Her silly sister thought it was all gratitude from him, but she knew men better than Autumn did.
Sure, they might have connected over his daughter. Autumn was fantastic with kids, with everyone really, and that made her extra endearing. But Tash wasn’t looking for a babysitter. Far as she knew, he wasn’t looking at all, for anything, except a fresh start for him and Sadie.
Yet she’d felt the vibe whenever Tash looked at Autumn.
Whatever it meant, she wanted Autumn looking well rested when she saw him again.
It was only 5:30 a.m., but with the heat, the earlier the better. By 11:00 a.m. it would be broiling hot, so she wanted to get as much done as she could before Tash and Sadie showed up.
Dressed in a light tank top, jean shorts and her work boots, with her hair up in a loose twist, she headed out a half hour later. The sun peeked over the hills, sending out a golden glow that highlighted the barn and other outbuildings, and gave stubby fruit trees long shadows.
Lucky her—she lived in paradise. She didn’t ever want to take it for granted.
Work on a farm could be never-ending, but there were times, like today, when she enjoyed the
routine. It gave her a chance to lose herself in monotony, to talk to creatures that didn’t talk back and to soak up the unconditional love animals always shared.
By rote, she got busy working through each chore. She fed the animals and let them roam free while she cleaned their areas, giving each plenty of attention. The free-range chickens, now that they’d eaten, followed her around, pecking at her feet and tripping her up a few times.
She hadn’t bothered with makeup, and good thing, considering the number of times she swiped her wrist across her face. Even this early, she started to wilt...and so did her clothes. The waistband of her shorts now hung loose, just like the neckline of her shirt. Parts of her hair escaped her tie, only to stick to her neck.
She never should have hassled Autumn about sweating, but then who knew such a massive heat wave was on the horizon? She remembered Mike calling her “princess,” and not in a complimentary way. Last night he’d flirted—with her and every other woman.
Blasted confusing man. He left her muddled—a feeling she didn’t appreciate, especially when most guys were easy. She knew how to flirt, but how could she flirt with him when he kept her guessing?
She realized she was thinking about him—again—and did her best to put him from her mind.
The grueling weather made her want to collapse and, finally, after weighing her options, she headed to the lake.
With the chores done, she wanted a dip. That’d do a lot to cool her down and clear her head.
The chickens, clucking softly, trailed behind her as she headed down the well-worn dirt path to their own little private cove. Along the way, she lifted the hem of her shirt to let air reach her midriff.
It didn’t help.
When she got close to the lake, frogs leaped in and lazy fish swam away. Two turtles, resting on a partially submerged log, ignored her. A large willow tree shaded one little section, but over the rest, sunlight reflected brightly on the placid surface.
Shading her eyes, she looked around. From here she couldn’t even see the main body of the lake, just the other side of the cove full of trees, scrubby brush and cattails.