“I enjoy being able to help other vets, and you know I enjoy the thrill of the challenges. What’s wrong, Lacey? You’ve been distant all week and I think I deserve to know why,” he said.
She walked away from him and headed to the far wall, where pictures of the very first challenge the veterans had gone on were shown. Next to those pictures hung a five by seven picture of Ben, dressed in his officer’s uniform.
“Ben used to talk about the two of you starting up a program like this when you got out of the military,” Lacey said as she ran her fingers across the edge of Ben’s picture. “He would be so proud of what you’ve done here.”
“I hope so,” he said as he came to stand next to her.
“I’m proud of you too, and I would never want to come between you and this group of vets,” she said, then paused.
“I can hear the ‘but’ coming,” he said. He turned towards her and took her hands in his. “Tell me what’s wrong. It can’t be that bad. Tell me what’s happened that has you upset.”
He took her chin in his hands and turned her face up towards his. He dropped a kiss on the tip of her nose and then her forehead, then waited.
“The other day at work they brought in a trauma patient, victim of a motorcycle accident, and for a moment I thought it was you,” she said.
She pulled away from him and turned her back.
“I don’t understand. This has something to do with work? I don’t even remember a motorcycle wreck,” he said.
She was going to walk away from him and he still didn’t know why.
“It was right at shift-change. Just before you came on duty. And, no, this has nothing to do with work. It has to do with the fact that I looked down at that man and remembered you had told me you were going to ride your motorcycle to work that day. It could have been you. You could have been lying there on that stretcher, tubed and unresponsive. It was just more than I could take,” she said. “I know it sounds stupid, but it doesn’t change the fact that someday someone could come to my door and tell me that something bad has happened to you. Or you could go off on this volcano hiking—which sounds crazy—and fall in and burn to death.”
“Or you could have someone slit your throat with a scalpel while you are innocently doing your job at the hospital,” Scott said.
His gut twisted at the memory of that night in the ER. He could have lost her.
Lacey turned toward him, surprise written across her features. Yes, he could understand the fear she was feeling. He’d experienced that same fear. Except it hadn’t been about some abstract possible situation. He’d witnessed the real thing as he’d watched her life or death about to be decided by a deranged drunk.
“We can work through this, Lacey,” he said. “I know that losing Ben the way you did was brutal, but have you considered all the wives who have watched their husbands die slowly in front of their eyes as disease took them? How many times have we had to tell someone that their son or mother or wife has passed away unexpectedly?”
“I know in my head what you’re saying is true, but that didn’t stop me from panicking when I thought it was you lying on that stretcher. You know what I went through after I lost Ben. You know what a coward I am,” she said as she turned back to him.
“You are not a coward,” Scott said as he walked over to her.
Would she turn away from him now? Could he have lost her before she’d even given them a chance?
“Yes, I am—but I’m trying to do better. It’s going to take some work, and I’m going to need you to be patient with me,” Lacey said, and then she turned toward him and walked into his arms.
He closed his arms around her. She was giving the two of them a chance, and for now that was all he could ask.
“Katie is waiting for me. I promised to take her to the hospital tonight, so that she can thank everyone who took care of her,” she said against his shoulder.
He made his arms relax around her. She wasn’t running away from him. Not this time.
As she raised her face up to his he lowered his lips gently to hers. Just that small taste of her was enough to set his body on fire. He knew he had to let her go, and that he had to trust they would get through this together. He was asking her to face her fears and now he had to face his own as he watched Lacey walk out the door—because right now he didn’t think he could face his life without her.
* * *
Lacey tucked the little girl under the blanket and nodded to the red-eyed woman who sat at her bedside. The poor woman had been fighting her daughter’s fever for hours before she had brought her into the ER and she looked like she was going to drop.
She handed the woman the extra blanket she had brought into the room. “Her fever is down. Why don’t you close your eyes for a few minutes? I’ll be back as soon the lab work comes in,” Lacey said.
The young mother gave her a tired smile, then wrapped the warm blanket around her and closed her eyes. Lacey shut the door as quietly as possible, then headed next door to help Scott with another patient.
She could hear arguing before she walked in the room. At first she wondered if she needed to get in the middle of the patient and her husband, but it quickly became apparent that neither of them meant anything with their constant nipping at each other.
“I can’t believe this has happened,” the elderly woman said as Lacey watched Scott close up the laceration on her forehead.
Fortunately for her, the CAT scan had been negative, so all she would need was a few stitches.
“It was that greedy cat. She’s always winding around between your feet when you’re in the kitchen,” the patient’s husband said. “I told you this was going to happen.”
The man had been grouchy since his wife had been brought in by the emergency medical techs, and Lacey had been listening to the two of them bicker back and forth for the last half-hour.
“It wasn’t the cat that made me fall down. It was you, scaring me to death when you came up behind me. What were you thinking? I don’t understand where your mind goes sometimes. We’ve been married almost fifty years now and you still think it’s funny to sneak up behind me and pinch my butt? When are you going to grow up?” the woman grumbled.
Lacey watched as Scott paused with his needle in the air. Hadn’t he done the same thing just last night, while she had been turning steaks on the grill?
She fought the laughter that wanted to explode out of her. Would this be the two of them fifty years from now?
The laughter died inside her. What were the chances that they would still be together in forty years? She’d spent the last three years of her life accepting that she would grow old alone, but now here she was thinking of a future fifty years down the road with Scott...
He finished the last few stitches and then, before leaving the room, he gave her a look and a smile that told her he was thinking about the night before too. Was he thinking of a future for them?
They had avoided the subject of a long commitment, which she knew was for the best while she worked through her emotions concerning Scott’s way of life and his need to chase the next thrill.
She’d let him pull her into the planning of the program’s upcoming challenges, and he had taken the time to show her how they worked through all the possibilities of emergencies and the strategies they used to decrease the risk of their being errors and injuries.
But was it enough to calm her fears the next time he left her to go on one of his extreme challenges? Probably not. Besides, why did she have to be the only one dealing with her issues so they could make this happen? Shouldn’t Scott make some changes too? Would he? Or, more importantly, could he?
He lived for the adventures he went on, and if she insisted he stopped going eventually he’d resent her for it, and that wasn’t what she wanted.
She gave the woman some discharge instructions, then went back to check for th
e lab work on the little girl.
After pulling up the lab results she walked over to where Scott was staring at his computer screen. “The lab work all came back clear on the little girl in Room Twenty. She’s sleeping now and her fever is down. Can I discharge her after her fluids are in?” she said.
She waited for Scott to respond. He seemed mesmerized by what he was reading on the computer screen.
“Scott?” she said.
She bent down lower, to see what it was that had made him zone out on her, but as she moved to look over his shoulder the screen suddenly changed. An email filled the screen, all about the city’s Special Citizen awards ceremony.
“Sorry,” he said as he turned his chair around toward her, making her back up before she lost her balance and ended up in his lap. Again. “You were saying something about some lab work?”
‘Yeah, the little girl in Twenty who came in with the hundred and three temperature. Her lab work looks good. I wanted to know if I could discharge her. Are you okay?” Lacey asked, when she saw that she had lost his attention again.
“Sure, I’m fine,” he said, and he rubbed his hand over his forehead as if to clear away whatever his mind had been occupied with. “Yeah, you can let her go. I’ve already spoken with her mother. I suspect her daughter brought home something viral from school. She should be okay by tomorrow.”
“I’ll have her mom call her pediatrician if she’s not better in the morning,” Lacey said, and started to walk away.
“Did you get someone to cover for you for the awards ceremony?” Scott asked.
“It’s taken care of. You know I wouldn’t miss it,” she said, as she went over to her own computer to generate the necessary paperwork for the discharge.
She looked over toward Scott as he turned back to his computer, hit some buttons, and then leaned toward the screen. He wiped at his forehead again. What was it that was bothering him? Had he just gotten that email concerning the ceremony or was it something else? They talked about pretty much everything now. If something was troubling him he knew he could talk to her.
Picking up the papers from the printer, she headed down the hallway to give a tired mother some good news and send her home to bed.
CHAPTER NINE
SCOTT LOOKED ACROSS the crowded ballroom, which tonight had been dressed up in white linen and crystal. Some of the most influential people in New Orleans had gathered there tonight, and the fact that he had been included was incredible. It was a privilege to be nominated for the city’s Special Citizen award, but more importantly the attention would really help with the funding for future challenges that he was planning. The program was growing so fast that soon their annual fundraisers wouldn’t be able to cover their expenses, and the last thing he wanted to do was to turn any veteran away.
He looked to where Lacey sat. She was so beautiful, sitting beside him with her hair piled up on her head. He wanted to bend toward her and kiss his way up the bare skin of her neck till he reached that one magic spot behind her ear that always made her gasp. He wanted to strip her of all her composure and expose the woman who had made love with him last night.
She chose that moment to look over at him and smile, as she laughed at something the speaker at the podium was saying. She’d worn another green dress that matched her eyes, which sparkled like emeralds with her laughter. He was so glad she was enjoying the evening—because in a few hours he’d have no choice but to ruin it.
How did he tell her that he was leaving? They’d had so little time together. Maybe they would have had a chance if this had happened later in their relationship. But now, just when she was just coming to terms with her fear of caring for someone she might suddenly lose, there was little hope that she would be waiting for him when he returned.
“Scott,” Lacey said as she nudged him with her foot, “they’re about to announce the nominees. Pay attention.”
He forced himself to listen to the speaker as he spoke about each of the individuals nominated and their accomplishments. He recognized several of the other names, and couldn’t help but be impressed that he had been nominated along with them.
When his name was announced all the people at the table where he sat clapped loudly.
“I’m so proud,” said Lacey as the speaker moved on to the next nominee. “Alston was very upset when I told him only adults were invited tonight, but I reminded him of the trip to the zoo your sister is taking him on tomorrow, and he decided that the zoo would be a lot more fun than dressing up in a suit.”
“Right now a trip to anywhere would be better,” he said.
He really didn’t like to be the center of attention. He’d rather be in the background working than have a lot of people staring at him. Lacey had made him prepare an acceptance speech, even though he knew that he wouldn’t need one. She’d made him recite it to her over and over the night before, though he had told her it was a waste of time.
“And this year’s winner of our New Orleans Special Citizen award is...” The man drew out the suspense while Lacey squeezed his hand. “Scott Boudreaux, founder of Extreme Warrior.”
What?
He listened as the speaker read out a letter that had been sent in from one of the vets who had joined the group when she’d been at his lowest and considering suicide. Then he went on to talk about how the program had given her the confidence to make a new life in the culinary community.
Scott was shocked. It was Katie? Had she really been considering harming herself? He’d never known she was at that kind of crisis point in her life. The fact that his group of vets had helped her through that time made him proud.
The next hour went by in a blur. He stood in front of the crowd and explained the mission and vision of Extreme Warrior, and described some of their future challenges, while he tried to keep his knees from knocking behind the podium. Then he added something to his speech that he had been thinking about a lot lately but hadn’t shared with Lacey.
“And while I thank you from the bottom of my heart for this honor, and your support of our local veterans, this honor really goes to my best friend and fellow officer Ben Miller, who sacrificed his life for others. This program was as much his vision as mine, and though he’s been gone from us for a while now his dream of finding a way to challenge the veterans of New Orleans to be the best they can lives on in all the veterans who have taken part in this program.”
He looked over at the table, where Lacey was wiping tears from her eyes.
“Thank you,” he said again, then stepped down off the podium.
He shook hands with people whose names he would never remember, and was given promises of monetary support that was more than he could ever have imagined.
Lacey was working the crowd too, as if she had been born into this kind of society. He smiled as he watched her blend in with the crowd as she promoted the challenges that were planned for the program next year.
By the time they left the ballroom they were both exhausted.
For a few hours he’d forgotten that he had to tell Lacey that he was leaving. They’d both enjoyed the night and he couldn’t imagine having to ruin it now. He struggled between the right thing to do and what he wanted to do.
The countdown of days before his departure had begun. He was running out of time. And yet something inside him rebelled against telling Lacey tonight. He wanted one more night with her. One more night to love her like she needed to be loved—one more night to show her how deep his love for her went.
As they approached her door he made his decision.
“You know, I tried that trick you were talking about? The one where you imagine everyone in the audience is in their underwear? It didn’t work.”
He moved in closer and turned her toward him. He bent down and kissed her neck, just above her collarbone, then ran kisses up her throat just as he had imagined earlier in the night. He’d pay the pri
ce tomorrow when he came clean with her. He’d make sure tonight was worth the pain they’d have to deal with later.
“Do you want to know why it didn’t work?” he whispered into her ear, then nipped at the back of her earlobe.
“Uh-huh...” she said as she inhaled deeply and then pressed her body against his.
He didn’t have her gasping yet, but the night was young.
“Because as I looked across the room the only person I had eyes for was you,” he said.
He ran his hands up her neck, then entangled them in her hair, bringing his mouth to hers for a deep kiss. He poured all his longing into that kiss and then pulled back and looked into green eyes heavy with desire.
“Do you want to know what I saw?” he asked.
His body, tight with desire, begged him to take her. But if they only had this one night he was going to make it last.
“Yes...” she moaned as his lips went back to that so-sensitive spot of hers.
“I saw you there...looking so proper, with your hair piled high, your smile so sweet and innocent. Then I imagined peeling that dress off you, inch by inch, and finding that lacy pink bra...”
He ran his hands up her body and curved them around her breasts, taking the weight of them in hands.
“You know...the one that’s cut down to here...”
He ran a hand down between her breasts and then moved both hands around to her back. He grasped her bottom and pulled her against the length of him.
“It has those matching panties...the ones with just that small piece of lace that hugs your bottom so tight.”
Lacey moaned against him, then pulled his head down to hers. “Scott,” she said between kisses, “less talking, more kissing.”
He reached behind her and punched in the code for her door. Swinging the door open, he turned to Lacey and swung her up into his arms. Lacey bent her head back and laughed up at him.
Time stood still as he froze that moment into his mind. Small tendrils of hair fell around her face, framing brilliant green eyes that shone with happiness, while her bruised and swollen lips curved into a naughty smile that stole his breath. He’d thought her beautiful earlier that night, but this was the real beauty—the real Lacey. The Lacey he remembered from the first time he’d met her.
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