by Rai Aren
Tramen stood by his sister, also watching with immense curiosity the people who were coming into their lives. He saw how excited his sister was, and at that moment, knew fully the effect of their lives diverging so many years ago. This was not something the twins shared. This moment was Anjia’s alone.
Uta and Ehrim were in awe of their surroundings. They looked around at the beautifully manicured grounds, the grand Palace, the Royal guards bowing as they drove up the lane. They thought of their own humble home, the one a Royal Princess had lived in, and they felt very, very small.
Traeus and Mindara placed their arms around Anjia as the cart came to a stop. Anjia could no longer contain her excitement and bolted forward to meet them. Before she could catch herself, she called out, “Mother! Father!”
Traeus visibly winced at her words.
Almost immediately Anjia regretted what she said. But then she thought what else was she to call them? That was who they were to her. She focused on the two people in front of her and lost herself to the moment.
“Oh, my precious girl!” Uta cried out as Anjia hugged both her and Ehrim.
“Pan…I mean Anjia…I mean Princess…” Ehrim stumbled over his words, “we cannot tell you how much we have missed you.”
Uta held her tight. “It is so good to see you again.” She cried tears of joy.
“I have missed you, too,” Anjia said, tears streaming down her cheeks, “so much. I am so glad you are here.”
Uta wiped her face, though the tears kept coming. “We have brought you something,” she said. Uta handed her the little wool lion cub from home. “He missed you.”
Anjia’s eyes lit up at the sight of it. More tears came. She had forgotten to take her treasured toy with her in her rushed departure. “Thank-you,” she whispered, holding it tight to her chest. She had slept with it every night. She felt awash in warmth and love having them near again. A weight lifted off her. In this moment, she felt like just a little girl again, the one without titles, responsibilities and expectations. For the moment, she forgot everything that was troubling her.
Ehrim smiled. “You look so beautiful,” he said. “Look at you in your fine dress.”
“You are a vision, my dear,” Uta said, touching her cheek.
Anjia beamed. She wore an emerald silk gown that had once belonged to her mother. It matched Anjia’s eyes perfectly. She had also had her hair put up and braided with gold ribbons. Her ankh pendant hung around her neck, shining brightly. She looked like royalty.
“I would like to introduce you to my…” she hesitated. She had not thought this part through, “…to my…other family.” She did not know how else to say this. She had two families.
Uta and Ehrim looked up at the entrance to the Royal Palace. They had never been in the main city before, let alone at the steps of the Palace. They saw the Royal Family standing there…looking at them. Suddenly, they felt very intimidated.
Anjia smiled encouragingly, she knew what they must be feeling. “It is all right,” she whispered, “they are just people, the same as you. Come, take my hand, it will be fine.”
They were speechless and very, very nervous.
She took their hands, squeezing them gently, and led them back to where the Royal Family stood. “May I present King Traeus and Queen Mindara.”
Uta and Ehrim bowed deeply.
The King stepped forward to greet them. “It is an honor to finally meet you.” Inwardly, he fought against a rising tide of resentment and jealousy. He willed the strength to be what his daughter needed in this moment. He swallowed his pride.
“Your Majesties, the honor is ours,” Ehrim said.
“Welcome. We are grateful you have come,” Mindara said, smiling warmly. “I hope your journey went well.”
“Yes, thank-you, your Majesty,” Uta said, smiling in return and trying to hide her nervousness. She was in awe of the Royals. She also felt very self-conscious in their modest attire.
The King introduced them to the rest of the family. “These are our sons, Anjia’s twin brother, Tramen, this is Setar, and the little one is Alaj.”
They locked eyes with Tramen, their daughter’s twin brother. They were captivated.
He looked at them, his gaze warm, yet penetrating. He nodded.
The mixture of emotions felt by all present was almost dizzying.
“What a beautiful family you have,” Uta said, with a wistful smile. She felt sad and empty in that moment. She and her husband no longer had the blessing of children in their home and would never again.
As if reading their thoughts the King said, “This is now your family, too. You are no longer alone.” His words, though spoken from an intellectual place, served to quell some of his own misgivings and apprehension.
Uta raised a trembling hand to her mouth, her eyes lowered, as she was overcome with emotion.
Her husband placed his arm around her shoulder, as she shook with tears. “You greatly honor us, your Majesty,” Ehrim said as he bowed his head.
Anjia was so proud of her father, Traeus, in that moment, and grateful for his generous spirit. She felt her heart swell with joy. “You both must be exhausted from your journey,” she said, recognizing how potent and overwhelming this experience would be for them, for everyone. “We have a room prepared for you. I will show you there. I can give you a tour of the Palace and the grounds when you are rested.”
“That would be lovely,” Uta smiled, looking visibly relieved. She felt like she could faint.
“We would also like to invite you to a feast we are having tonight in your honor,” the King said.
“You are too kind, your Majesty,” Ehrim said. “We are deeply honored. Thank-you.”
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Anjia walked Uta and Ehrim to their room, visited with them a short while, and then excused herself to allow them their rest. Inside the spacious guest room, fruits, baked goods and cool water waited for them on a center table adorned with fine linens. Fresh clothes had also been provided. Anjia had given the Palace tailors their sizes and had formal clothes created for the dinner. She had also had an array of casual outfits made. She knew they did not have much and would be intimidated by their surroundings. Uta and Ehrim were very grateful for her thoughtfulness.
That evening many people gathered in the dining hall to formally welcome Uta and Ehrim to the Royal Palace. It had been beautifully decorated with colorful ribbons and flowers. In one corner, musicians dressed in emerald robes played celebratory songs. Tall golden candles burned with bright warmth on every table. People milled about chatting. Long banners hung from the walls adorned with the Royal crest.
The priests, including Assan, were also in attendance, but Assan kept a distance from Traeus out of respect and understanding for how difficult this situation was for him.
Traeus watched uncomfortably from a distance as Assan, Odai and Senarra greeted Uta and Ehrim. He tried to suppress the resentment over their complicity that still burned deep within him. He finally forced himself to look away.
“Odai, Senarra!” Uta exclaimed.
The two priests smiled and stepped forward. “It is good to see you both again,” Odai said, tears filling his eyes. He and Senarra embraced them.
“May I introduce our son, Auraelion,” Odai said, as the young boy smiled shyly.
“Oh my, he is handsome!” Uta gushed.
“Hello Auraelion, we are pleased to meet you,” Ehrim said as he shook the young boy’s hand.
“Hello,” he replied very politely.
Assan stepped forward. He had waited quietly for his turn to come. He sensed the King watching from a distance.
“Assan!” Uta said holding out her arms. Assan hugged her briefly, aware of his King, who now turned away.
Ehrim shook his hand. “Your Grace.”
&nbs
p; “I am glad you have come,” Assan said.
They spoke for a short time about the journey to the city, and their first impressions of the Royal Palace. Then it was time for dinner.
A sumptuous meal had been prepared. Uta and Ehrim were seated with the Royal Family. They were awed by the amount of food and wine present. The music wafted throughout the softly lit hall.
Anjia was put very much at ease having them there. Comfortable conversation buzzed around the table over the long, leisurely meal. Traeus had even felt himself slowly start to relax.
“Panarra…” Uta started to say, then immediately realized her error. Her hand flew to her mouth. She saw the King’s face flush at the mention of the name his daughter had lived under. “Oh, your Majesty, I am so sorry. I did not mean to…”
“It is all right,” Anjia said, patting her hand. “You called me that for a long time.”
Traeus however was thunderstruck by hearing the name. He said nothing. He sat stone-faced.
Uta felt terrible. Ehrim was quiet and avoided eye contact with the Royals.
Shortly afterwards, Traeus excused himself from the table. He could not stay any longer.
Queen Mindara felt badly for her husband and went with him. “Please forgive us, it has been a long day, we are very tired,” she said, trying not to make their guests feel worse about what happened. “We will see you tomorrow. Enjoy the rest of your evening.”
Uta and Ehrim got up and bowed as the Royal couple quickly left, speaking to no one else on their way out of the dining hall.
Chapter 21
A Request is Made
FROM that point on, as much as the King tried to deal with things in a positive, somewhat friendly fashion, Uta and Ehrim’s presence had put a visible strain on him. Mindara had tried to assuage his anxiety over meeting the people who had taken his daughter in, and she had succeeded for a time. But hearing his daughter’s assumed name at the banquet triggered something deep and dark within him. As much as he tried to forget the past and forgive those involved, his bitterness grew day by day. He had once again started to withdraw from his family.
Anjia saw the toll this was taking on her father, but she too suffered, for different reasons. She came to see him one night after Uta and Ehrim had retired for the night. She found him sitting alone in the Palace library staring at the fire slowly dying in the fireplace. The red embers glowed. Small licks of flames tried desperately to hang onto their brief life. “Daddy? May I speak with you?”
Traeus sighed heavily. He had wanted to be alone. He was weary from the day. Trying to marshal a smile, he turned to look at her standing in the doorway. “Yes, Anjia, of course. Come sit down.” He turned back to the fire. He felt stretched thin, like the world had been asking too much of him and, little by little, it was pulling him too far.
The library was dark, save for the small fire. “You look so tired,” she said, as she sat down on the sofa next to him. She took his hand.
“I am,” he said.
“This has been difficult for you, especially, I think,” she said. She noticed the way his shoulders sagged forward. She had second thoughts about what she wanted to ask him.
He did not reply. He went to reach for his mug of spirits, but it was empty. He did not have the energy to pour another.
She bit her lip, and tucked her hair behind her ears. “We have not spoken since the night of the welcoming banquet. I have been worried about you.”
“You need not be,” is all he would say. He knew she wanted him to open up, but he felt conflicted. He did not want to share what he was feeling with her, or Mindara. They had been through this already, but the dark feeling had returned. He had seen her easy comfort with Uta and Ehrim, the kind that only comes from time spent together, from unconditional love and from absolute trust. He could not help but feel it somehow diminished his place in his daughter’s life and in her heart. He felt deeply envious of their special place in his daughter’s life. ‘They had no right to be there,’ he thought. ‘It should not have happened.’ He took up his empty mug, holding it tightly. He turned it in his hand.
Anjia watched him, reading the minutest of reactions on his face, in his demeanor. She could not ask this of him now. “I will leave you,” she said as she got up. “I just wanted to say goodnight.”
He clenched his jaw. “That is not true,” he said, his voice low. “You had something you wanted to say to me. Sit, let us talk.”
She sat back down, a little less close than last time. She thought about how best to proceed. She took a deep breath. “Uta and Ehrim have enjoyed their time here. Thank-you for the gracious and generous hospitality you have shown them. I know it has not been easy for you. I wanted you to know how grateful I am for everything you have done.”
He nodded, staring into the bottom of his mug. The remnants of firelight flickered and danced in colorful patterns.
“They are due to leave in a few days,” she said.
He did not reply. He looked forward to their absence, though he would never admit it to his daughter.
She pressed on. “They are growing old, Daddy, and I am concerned for them. I do not want them to go.”
He squeezed his eyes shut. “You wish to extend their visit then?” Traeus asked, his voice tight. “For how long?”
“What I mean to say is that…I was wondering if you would consider…”
“What?” he snapped.
She was taken aback slightly.
“I am sorry, Anjia” he said, “I am just tired, that is all. What is it you want me to consider?”
She hesitated for a moment, but decided this was too important to her to let go of it. “I would like to invite them to…to live here, at the Palace.”
He dropped his mug. It broke on the floor into countless tiny shards. He was speechless. He had not seen this coming, though perhaps he should have.
“Oh dear, let me help you,” she said, bending down to pick up the pieces.
“Leave it,” he said sharply. “I will tend to it.”
She looked up at him.
His face was hard. He looked different from the father she knew.
“Daddy?” she said. “They are getting old. We have more than enough room at the Palace to…”
“Do not ask this of me.”
She did not want to back down. “But why? They are good people. They took care of me for so long. Do they not also now deserve to be cared for?”
Traeus felt himself getting upset. He felt angry. It was all too much for him. “While these people were caring for you, your rightful family suffered an unspeakable loss!”
“They knew nothing of the circumstances, it was not their fault. They only did what they were asked,” she said.
“They were not asked by me!” he yelled, no longer able to contain his rising emotions.
Anjia did not reply. She decided to let his anger simmer down. The two sat in silence, each waiting for the other’s next words.
Finally she spoke, “I miss them, Daddy.”
Traeus hung his head at those words. He could sense the depth of feeling she had for these people, but this was at war with his own feelings of bitterness, anger and jealously. Seeing her with them only reinforced how much time, how many important experiences he had lost with her. He resented it, deeply.