Alex pulled into her spot and saw “little blue” already there. Cyn must have arrived really early. She knew she was going to get a lot of questions, she just hoped she could answer them all without getting too emotional. As she walked through the door, Cyn was just starting the toast and surprised to see Alex this early.
“Hey, good morning! How are you?” Cyn thought Alex looked great, and thank goodness she was back to her old hairstyle.
“I’m great. Are we alone?” Alex looked around to make sure they were completely alone. “Yep, as always I’m the first one here.” Cyn was spreading jam on a piece of toast. The coffee was almost done perking.
“Dez and I had our talk. I know she isn’t happy with my decision, but I am.” Gosh that sounded good to Alex.
“What decision is that?” Cyn was surprised a decision had been made. She just thought they were going to have a talk about what was wrong with their relationship and how to fix it.
“I’m moving out as soon as I can find a place.” That sounded even better.
Cyn dropped the knife. “Moving out as in breaking up, moving out?” This wasn’t happening. Cyn need to concentrate on what Alex was saying. It was too good to be true.
“Yes, as in breaking up. I’ve been thinking about the last four years and what I said to you. I can’t, no won’t, continue this way anymore. I am going to be happy. It’s my turn. I want what we had the first year and I know that isn’t Dez. So I need to grieve about this and move on. But my next relationship I will be taking slowly very, very slowly. I want people to comment on how slowly I’m taking my next relationship.” Alex was hearing the words as she spoke them and hoped when it came time she would remember them. But she wasn’t making any promises. Only time, and maybe remembering the pain from this failed relationship, would help her do it right next time.
“Wow, Alex, I didn’t know it was this bad. You never said anything about breaking up. I mean you don’t have to discuss your personal problems with me. You just seemed to be the same person, no mood swings, just the same old Alex.” How could she have been so blind to this? Cyn was sure she hadn’t missed anything.
“Cyn, I wasn’t going to burden you with my relationship problems. Having a long drive every morning helped me get in the right frame of mind, so no one would be able to tell anything was wrong on the home front. I’m a very private person in that regard and no one will ever know by my actions here at school that something is wrong. You’re the only person I let know about Barney or Richard. I guess we can call him that now. I don’t want other people knowing my business. Unfortunately this Richard drama even made it clear to me that Dez wasn’t worth discussing it with. I need a lover who is in tune with me, as I am with her. Dez fell short in that department.” The more Alex talked about her failed relationship, the more she realized why it was destined to fail after that first year.
Cyn was speechless. She had always hoped for this moment, and now that it was here she froze. “Alex, is there anything I can do?” was all Cyn could think to say.
“Just keep an eye out for an apartment or small house to rent someplace nice and quiet.” The thought of moving all her stuff was the only down side to this solution.
Alex thought the coffee tasted exceptionally good this morning. The two talked about what she was looking for in a place, and how she would decorate it. Since she had moved in with Dez, the place was pretty much decorated in “Early Dez.” Alex had some stuff in storage, but didn’t have everything she would need to set up a house.
Cyn was in heaven. She knew Alex needed some time to heal from the past, but she was available to hang with. The Wednesday night date might eventually turn into an every night date. If her guardian angel was responsible for all this, then maybe she could see to it that she and Alex would end up being together someday. Only time would tell and she wasn’t going to do anything to jeopardize that possibility.
When the other teachers started to arrive, Alex greeted them and then left for class. As she walked out into the sunshine it seemed like an exceptionally beautiful day. She felt a hand on her shoulder and then an arm around her waist. Cyn was going to escort her to class. The two walked together as far as they could before breaking off. “See you at lunch?”
“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.” Today was the beginning of the rest of Alex’s life. She was going to make being happy her number one priority from now on.
That morning Alex had her classes writing essays on their favorite activity. She had watched Megan, who was in her second period class, writing what appeared to be a short novel when she had only asked for a thousand words. She was distracted today and not focusing so well on her lesson plan. Essays were time consuming and had kept everybody busy. It seemed lunch came very quickly.
Her grilled cheese tasted better than she remembered. In a way she wanted to thank Barney for making her see that there was more to life. Richard she wanted to strangle, for making her an emotional wreck. Cyn was unusually quiet today and appeared to be preoccupied.
“Are you okay girlfriend, is there something bothering you?” She had a faraway look in her eye.
“It seems like so much has happened so quickly. A week ago we were just friends who only ate lunch together – now we’re spending more time together. I never would have thought this would happen in a million years.” Could Cyn hope for anymore than this, or would it all disappear if she did?
Alex would have bet a week ago that none of this would have happened either. But she wouldn’t change a thing.
“I was going to check with the guys after school to see if any of them remember a delivery truck from a florist. I know it was over a month ago, but we don’t get that many floral deliveries so one of them may remember.” Cyn remembered her assignment in getting evidence against Richard.
“Cyn, have you ever met or even seen this Richard Greenway?” Alex knew she hadn’t.
“I racked my brain last night and I can only think of one guy I’ve seen a couple of times. I thought he may have been visiting, as he comes and goes, but it could be him. He sort of looks like Mrs. Greenway, but he’s tall, with dark hair and she’s short, with white hair. It’s totally obvious they’re related.” Cyn was smiling and shaking her head, but he was the only one.
“Okay you’ve only seen him a couple of times. Barney/Richard has only made himself known to me three times. The flowers and note on my truck the first day of school, the St. Christopher medal two weeks later, then the poem two weeks after that. Do your sightings of him coincide with that time frame?” This could help if this was the man.
“Yes, I did see him the first day of school, but then I saw a lot of parents milling around. As far as two weeks after that, it could have been that long. Now just last Tuesday you got the poem and I think it was him. He walked by my classroom in the late afternoon, maybe a half an hour before the last bell. Oh my god, he was heading for the parking lot now that I think about it. It has to be him. He must work some weird schedule, or Mrs. Greenway only has him come in every couple of weeks. Maybe she knows he can’t be trusted.” Cyn was ready to go tell his mother exactly what her big “little boy” was doing.
“Can you describe him to me so I can avoid him at all costs. Also, will you come by after the last bell in case he plans to start stopping by like he did with the other English teacher.” She wanted time to gather her evidence so that the first time he showed his face she could take him by the ear to his mother, so to speak.
“Alex when I say tall, I’m talking over six feet. Not bad looking for a straight guy, dresses nice and I think wears a pinky ring, yuck. But all in all looks like an accountant in a very straight uptight kind of way. You should stay away from him with or without evidence, Yes?” He didn’t look like he would be the kind of guy you would want to mess with, but who really knew.
“Yes, mother I hear you. Trust me. I really would love it if aliens would beam him to another planet. That way my problem would be totally solved in one flash of light.�
�� Alex figured a quick fix was not likely in this case. The lunch bell rang and it was back to class.
Chapter 16
Whereas the morning flew by, the afternoon dragged on. When the final bell sounded, Alex felt like her students on the last day of school. Finally we get to go. Cyn arrived as planned, no sign of Richard as of yet. She walked Alex to her truck then headed for the maintenance area to talk to Don, Marty and Gus.
Alex took a drive over to see her best friend of the equine persuasion. Beau came trotting over looking for his usual treat. Luckily Alex had remembered to grab carrots on her way out this morning. She checked her phone as she was always able to get service here. She had been told there was a cell sight near by. Maybe it was the reason she kept Beau here, she could reach her vet. It was the first time she had thought of Dez all day. As she looked at her cute gelding she started to cry. Why had Dez changed? She had loved her so much and now it was all gone. Had Dez changed or had Alex finally taken her down off that pedestal a position that was impossible for Dez to continue to hold?
Alex called her friend Jessie. Her husband, Dawson, had been a stunt man. He may know someone at Pegasus. She also needed to hear her best friend’s voice, as it had been too long. Alex was afraid she was going to get the machine and didn’t want to leave a message, but luckily Jessie picked up on the fourth ring.
“Hey Jess, how’s my best girlfriend? It’s good to hear your voice.” Alex was fighting back tears. She didn’t want to start balling before she could find out how things were with her.
“Alex, darlin’. I’m great, how about you? You must be with your boyfriend, if you’re calling me at this time. How’s he doing these days?” This was the usual time of day, and place for Jessie to hear from Alex.
“He’s the best, as always, getting fat though. I should send him to you to lose a few hundred pounds. How’s Dawson and the ranch? Keeping busy?” Oh how Alex wished she was standing in front of her friend. She needed a good long hug and Jessie gave the best.
“Dawson is great as always, but you already know that. The ranch is doing great too. We’re always busy out here this time of year, taking care of all those easterners who don’t want to freeze their rears off. You need to visit during Christmas time. It does get cold but not as cold as you get.” Jessie knew her friend very well and Alex was usually much more upbeat than this. When it came to Alex, Jessie knew all.
“Alex what’s wrong? You sound down.” Alex couldn’t hold it in any longer. She started to cry and told Jessie everything about Barney/Richard and about leaving Dez. She turned the novel into a short story but didn’t leave out any vital details. Jessie listened and wrote down Richard’s full name and where he worked. When she heard about the breakup she wasn’t surprised. She had just wished Alex had come to this conclusion sooner. Being her best friend, she wanted her to be happy, but she knew Dez was all wrong for Alex. Even Lena tried to tell her their charts weren’t completely compatible and that it would be very hard to stay together. It could only work if Alex was willing to make major concessions. She even pointed out a few things to Alex in the beginning of their relationship, but she was too far gone to hear her. Jessie wanted to comfort her dear friend over the phone, but Alex really did need a good cry and so she just listened. It was breaking her heart to hear her in so much pain, but knew she was strong and would get through it, eventually.
Alex caught herself heading for a pity party, table for one, right this way. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She was starting to feel a lot better and having Jessie on the other end made it all good.
“I’m sorry Jessie. I’m sure you have better things to do than listen to me balling.” Alex sure hoped so, as she wasn’t up for questions right now.
“Nope. Hearing from you is top priority for me. It doesn’t matter if it’s good or bad. You’re my girl, remember that. Now if you need to go, I completely understand. I know after a good cry I like to be alone, and not talk about it anymore.” Jessie and Alex had been down this road before.
“This is why I love you so much. You have a sixth sense about me, and tell me the good and the bad. I know I’m going to catch heck from you in a couple of days, but right now you feel I’ve been through enough, right?” She wasn’t the only one who understood the other.
“Ha, ha. You’ve got that right, darlin’. I’ll call you as soon as I have some news about your friend. Take care of yourself and keep Cyn close when you’re at school. She sounds like she can take care of herself, and you too, if need be. Kiss that boyfriend of yours for me. Bye.” Hopefully Dawson could find out some information about this creep. Jessie went looking for him so he could get on this right away.
Alex gave Beau a big hug and kiss on his nose. “Your mom’s dearest and bestest friend in the whole world said to give you a kiss. I know bad grammar but it’s the truth.” What did horses know about grammar anyway?
Alex hugged Beau and remembered all the good times she had with Jessie. Up until she had met her, she had never fallen for a straight woman. In fact, her gaydar was usually working just fine. But when it came to Jessie it just stalled. She was the most exotic woman Alex had ever met. Her green eyes were so alluring and Alex just melted the first time she looked into them. Their love of horses was their common interest, but they had a connection an instant friendship that would last forever.
Jessie had accepted Alex’s sexual preference like she had just told her she was Irish. It was no big deal, even after Alex warned her that people would talk about them. People always thought most lesbians really couldn’t have straight female friends, as they figured there had to be something going on. Why else would they be hanging together. Jessie would just say let them talk, it made no difference to her. And on more than one occasion Jessie would wrap her arms around Alex and kiss her right in front of people, just to prove to them how much she loved her friend. It wasn’t a lover kiss, but a friend kissing her best friend kind of kiss. But the first time she did it, Alex wished it had been a lover kiss. It was later that she realized they would always be friends and crossing that line could possibly mean losing her friend. She never wanted that.
Alex and Jessie had been inseparable for almost four years, before she met Dawson. It was an instant attraction of personality and compatibility from the very first. Neither woman was involved with anyone at the time and weren’t really looking, so being available to do things at a moment’s notice was key. Both women had small secluded houses, so not being bothered when they spent time together was easy. Jessie would work all day with her clients’ horses and then be ready to ride when Alex got off work. During the summer Alex would help tack up horses. It was like a little assembly line enabling Jessie to get the work done earlier so the two could go off and play. They liked to find out of the way places where they could shop at antique stores or thrift shops until they closed.
Whereas Jessie was quieter and didn’t talk much about her youth in the beginning, Alex was an open book and talked about everything under the sun. She trusted Jessie wouldn’t say anything. Plus, since they would never be lovers nothing she said could come back to haunt her down the road. Jessie got quite an education in Lesbian Love Life 101. She would sit in awe of Alex’s stories about her own failed relationship and those of others she had known. Jessie never really told Alex all that much about her cousin, who was gay, because she wanted permission from Samantha before she said anything. And besides, Sam had never asked Jessie to keep an eye out for any available women she came across. Jessie loved Alex like a sister and always hoped she would remember the past when dealing with the present, as far as girlfriends were concerned. But Alex always seemed to be the romantic optimist and saw only the good in everyone she dated. Their faults never seemed to appear until a lot of time had passed. Then it usually turned out to be a rough breakup, or at least it seemed that way to Jessie.
Chapter 17
When Alex arrived home there was no sign of Dez, which was fine with her. Dez was free to do whate
ver she wanted, with whomever she wanted, and so was Alex. As she walked through the door not a furry head raised from it’s slumber. As far as the cats were concerned, everything was still the same. She was going to miss them so much, but this was the only home they had ever known, and taking any of them away was unthinkable to Alex. Besides, Dez would never give any of them up.
Looking around the house Alex thought about how she would decorate her new place. She really wanted a little house with a garage for her truck and a work room. She could decorate any way she wanted and no one could tell her what she could and couldn’t do to it. She was going to get a futon so she could have Cyn sleep over. They could bake cookies like she and Jessie used to do on rainy days when they couldn’t ride. Plus she wanted to have a satellite so she could watch television and get more than just the local channels. The freedom Alex felt was amazing.
She could do what she wanted, when she wanted to do it. She loved being a couple, but that was just the point a couple is two, not one who does all the work of two. The next time she became a couple it was going to be fifty-fifty or else.
Having the place to herself was very familiar. Even though most nights Dez was home, she spent all her time either doing billing or research on the internet. Then of course there were the late calls and occasional emergencies which lately seemed more frequent. So Alex was excited about having someone to do things with and could hardly wait to do them.
Taylorwood (Alexandria Whitney Mystery) Page 11