by L A Cotton
“What?” I played dumb. “It’s true. You jocks are all the sa—”
He dipped his head silencing me with his lips and tongue. I melted against him and a couple of people behind us snickered.
“Cam,” I breathed. “We have to... stop.”
“You’re no fun.” It was his turn to pout.
“How’s your mom, Cameron?” We both turned to Flick and her expression grew serious.
“She’s doing as well as can be expected, thanks. The good news is her doctor seemed confident they got it all.”
“That’s great.”
It was great. Karen had survived the surgery and her prognosis was looking good. She wasn’t out of the woods yet, and she still had a long road ahead of her if the doctors decided she needed radiotherapy; but it was as positive as it could be given the circumstances.
Wrapping my arm around Cameron’s waist, I snuggled into his side. Despite his mom’s surgery going well, he’d still wanted to remain off the roster for tonight’s game. Coach and his teammates begged him to be on the sidelines, but in the end, he decided to watch from the bleachers. I think, deep down, he was still waiting for the call to say something had gone wrong.
“She’s okay,” I whispered, squeezing him tighter. Cameron glanced down at me and smiled.
“I know.” He kissed me again, and Flick grumbled.
“I think I liked you both better when you hated each other.”
“You’re practically glowing.” Flick linked her arm through mine as we followed Cameron around the back of the stadium to meet the team and congratulate them on a well-deserved win.
“I’m happy,” I admitted. “He makes me happy.”
“Well, duh.” She chuckled. “You managed to score yourself a Raider. I guess some things do come true.”
I gaped at her unable to school my indignance, but she only laughed harder. “You should see your face. Just be thankful I didn’t get you a shirt for your birthday with ‘hashtag I ride a Raider’ printed on it.” Flick winked.
“You’re just jealous.”
Her eyes clouded for a second, the air around us cooling considerably, but then Flick was smirking as if nothing had just happened. “Of course, I’m jealous. I mean, I have eyes. Look at him.”
So, I did.
Cameron was fist-bumping and guy-hugging his teammates. His friends. We hovered while he did his thing, letting Kaiden and Asher give him a play-by-play account of every touchdown as if we hadn’t been front and center watching the whole game. But I realized it was probably just their way of including him in their victory.
“How are things at home?” Flick pulled my attention away from Cameron.
“It’s weird. Mom and Kent are acting as if nothing happened, and Jason barely acknowledges either of them, so not much has changed there. I’m at that weird place where I want to be mad with her, but I’m not sure I have the energy to keep it up for much longer.”
“Look,” my best friend said. “She made a mistake. Yes, it was a pretty fucking epic one, but you can’t help who you fall in love with. You of all people should know that.”
“I...” Flick was right. She always was. But it didn’t quell the sting of Mom’s betrayal. I think I was more hurt by the fact she’d lied all this time than the fact she’d had an affair.
People had affairs all the time. I didn’t condone it, but she and Kent were adults. They knew what they were doing. Jason and I knowing wouldn’t have changed anything.
But something told me, he was in no rush to forgive his dad.
“And you and Jason, what’s going on there?”
“Yeah, sister.” He appeared out of nowhere. “What is going on there?”
Flick rolled her eyes at him, but he barely looked twice at her.
“Don’t be a dick, Jason.”
His hands went up. “I come in peace.” His eyes flicked over to where Cameron was. “How is he?”
“Why don’t you ask him yourself?” There was no malice in my words. Cameron was right; life was too short. After sitting with him in the hospital waiting room while his mom underwent a life-saving craniotomy, I realized this grudge between me and Jason, the stuff with Thatcher, it didn’t matter. This was high school. Kids were mean and got off on bringing each other down. But the real world, where things were hard and painful and uncertain, was waiting for them. High school didn’t define me. I knew my worth, and this moment, right here, defined me.
Jason ran a brisk hand through his damp hair as I stepped closer to him and lay my hand on his arm. “You should go talk to him; he misses you.”
It didn’t matter what Jason did or didn’t think about me, our lives were entwined now. Whether he liked it or not. I loved his best friend, his brother in all the ways that counted, so we had to find a way to co-exist.
“I...” he hesitated.
“Go,” I said quietly. “He needs you; he needs to know you’re okay with all of this.”
Cameron might have said he was ready to quit the team, but I knew he wasn’t. Not really. But this thing between him and Jason was swaying him toward making the wrong decision. And regardless of what I thought about football, I didn’t want him to give up his dreams.
As if he felt us watching him, Cameron’s head snapped over to us. His eyes darkened when he saw Jason at my side. I dropped my hand to my step-brother’s back and nudged him forward. “Go, you’ll regret it if you don’t. Trust me.”
Chapter Forty
Cameron
I watched Hailee and Jason as he decided whether or not to come over here. She wanted him to, it was right there in her honey-brown eyes. But I didn’t make a move; this had to be on him.
Hailee was in my corner now. She might have only been in my life officially for a few days, but she had been there every step of the way. At the hospital while we waited for Mom to come out of surgery, waiting outside the locker room while I told Coach I needed some time away from the team. She’d been there, no questions asked. She just got it. Understood what I needed. And she was there.
It meant the fucking world to me.
But Jason was wired different. In his eyes, empathy and compassion were weaknesses. Traits that meant letting people get close—something he rarely did. So when he started stalking toward me, I braced myself for whatever shit was about to come out of his mouth.
“Hey,” he said.
“What’s up?” I tipped my head. Since I could remember, the two of us had been inseparable, but now it felt like there was an entire football field between us.
“It didn’t feel right out there tonight.” Jase looked over at me, his hair falling over his eyes slightly.
“You got the win; that’s all that matters, right?” I hadn’t meant for it to sound like a dig, but he flinched.
“Come on, bro, it’s not… Look, I screwed up, I get it.” His expression didn’t match the Jason I knew—the guy who was one step closer to State. “But you didn’t tell me, you didn’t—”
“You didn’t want to hear it.” My eyes shuttered. “You’re not like the rest of us, Jase. You’re so focused on football, on the future…”
“But this is different. I would’ve…” He let out a heavy sigh “How is she?”
“She’s doing okay but they won’t know if she needs radiotherapy yet.” Doctor Kravis was remaining optimistic that he’d gotten all the tumor cells, but since it was a grade two meningioma there was still a chance it could come back.
“Fuck,” Jase hissed out. “I’m so fucking sorry, man.”
“She’s alive and they got it, that’s what we’re focusing on right now.”
The wait for her to get out of surgery was something I never wanted to experience again. Those six hours had been excruciating. If hadn’t been for Xander’s incessant questions and having Hailee right there beside me, I think I would have lost it.
Jase rubbed the back of his neck. He wanted to say something, I could see it in his eyes. “What?” I asked.
“Nah, it doesn’t matter.”
>
“Go on, say it.”
“Do you think you’ll come back to the team… now she’s okay?”
I shook my head incredulously. Even now, he couldn’t see past football.
“Fuck, that came out wrong.” He scrubbed a hand down his face. “I mean, I get why you couldn’t play tonight; to be honest, I’m surprised you came at all.”
I hadn’t wanted to, but Dad insisted. Even Mom had given her blessing.
“What I mean is, I need you. You and me, Chase. We need to see this thing through together.”
“I don’t know if—”
“I know.” He held up his hands. “And I get it, I do. But we worked too hard for this, you worked too hard for it.”
“Listen, Jase, I’m not sure Penn is—”
“Fuck Penn. You’ve got to do what’s best for your family, I get it. It was always my dream anyway. But this year, it’s ours. I can do it without you, but honestly,”—Jase locked eyes on me—“I don’t want to.”
“Worried you’re nothing without your star wide receiver?” I smirked.
“Damn right I am. Kaiden is good but he’s no Fourteen.” He gave me a rare smile. “So what do you say, Chase? Are you in?”
“I can’t promise anything but if Mom is okay and the doctors are happy with her progress then yeah, I’m in.” Coach had already said I could cut back on practice if I needed to.
Relief settled in my best friend’s eyes, his shoulders sagging, and for the first time in my life, I saw Jason Ford lower his walls. He really meant every word he’d just said.
And that meant something to me.
Despite all the highs and lows and events of the last few weeks, the fact he’d finally managed to look past himself and football, meant something.
“So, you and Hailee, huh?” He flicked his head over to where the girls stood pretending not to watch us.
“Yeah, is it going to be a problem? Because I’ll lay it out there now; if you make me choose, it’ll be her, every damn time.” He was my best friend, but I was done being his puppet. I needed Hailee. I couldn’t really explain it, but I needed her. And now I finally had her, I had no plans on doing anything to jeopardize that.
“Guess I’d better get used to it then.” Jase shrugged but I saw the tightness around his eyes. “You know, we still need to get Thatcher back for what he did to her.”
“Jase, I’m not sure—”
“He’s going down, one way or another, he’s—”
“Who’s going down?” Hailee finally came over, guilt flashing in her eyes. “Sorry,” she whispered. “I couldn’t wait any longer.”
“It’s fine.” I hooked an arm around her, pulling her into my side.
“So, what were you talking about?”
“Ask lover boy.” The corner of Jase’s mouth tipped and I flipped him off.
“Ask lover boy what?” Ash appeared, his arm slung casually around Felicity who looked less than impressed at being dragged into our small gathering.
“I think they’re plotting something,” Hailee said, throwing me a dubious look.
“No plotting,” I said. “I promise.” But Jase’s eyes sparked with something dangerous, and I knew he wouldn’t let this thing with Thatcher go.
“The guys want to know if we’re headed to Bell’s?” Ash asked, his arm still around Felicity.
“I’m not sure—” I started but Hailee pressed her hand to my stomach. “It’s okay, if you want to go, we can go.” She nodded reassuringly.
“Fee, baby, you in?”
“Do you promise to stop calling me that?” Felicity rolled her eyes at Ash.
“I promise to get drunk and try to feel you up.” He winked and I caught Jase stiffen. I was missing something. Something that involved my two best friends and Felicity. But before I could try to figure out what the fuck was going on, Jase said, “Let’s go then.”
We followed him, as if the five of us, together, was just business as usual.
“Let me guess, this is on your list?”
“List, what list?” I asked Hailee, overhearing her and Felicity’s conversation, as we reached the door to Bell’s.
“Hmm, I didn’t realize you were there.” Hailee glanced back at me, her eyes wide as if she’d been caught with her hand in the cookie jar.
“Where did you think I was?”
“Already inside with Asher and Jason.”
“I’ll always be wherever you are.” I leaned down, kissing her. In truth, I’d called Dad to check in on Mom, but he assured me she was fine, and Xander was with Katie. After the hardest week of our lives, he wanted—no, demanded—I try to enjoy a night with my girlfriend and friends.
“Oh God, I need a drink. Something strong. It’s true the owner doesn’t card the team here, right?”
I chuckled, still kissing Hailee. She broke away, looking at her friend. “You want to drink? Here?”
Felicity shrugged. “Desperate times, Hails, desperate times.” She slipped inside leaving me and Hailee alone.
“She’s acting strange.” Hailee released a frustrated breath, and I hesitated, wondering whether or not to reveal my theory. “Cameron?”
Busted.
“So I, uh, I think something might be going on with Felicity and the guys.”
“The guys?” Hailee blanched. “What do you mean the guys?”
“Asher and Jase.”
“You think... no...” Strangled laughter spilled out of her. “Flick wouldn’t go anywhere near Jason, and this thing with her and Asher is a joke. It’s just a joke. I mean, it’s Asher, he’s...”
“Okay.” I dipped my head to hers. “Just breathe. I’m probably wrong. It’s probably nothing.” I was pretty sure it wasn’t nothing, but I could tell Hailee wasn’t ready to hear it.
“Of course, you’re wrong. She wouldn’t... nope, I just can’t.” Hailee shook her head, a look of alarm plastered over her face before entering Bell’s. I followed, regretting saying anything. But I knew Jase and I knew Ash and I’d sensed something going on for a while. And if I was right, it had disaster written all over it.
The second I stepped inside the bar, a wall of cheers and applause greeted me. Jase and Ash stood front and center, the rest of the team gathered behind them all chanting my name. I might not have been on the field tonight, helping them secure the win taking them one step closer to State, but this was their way of including me. Of showing me that no matter what happened from here on out I was still part of the team.
Still family.
“Good to see you, man.” Grady came up to me, pulling me into a guy hug. “We heard about your mom. If there’s anything I can do.”
“Thanks, man, I appreciate it,” I choked out the words over the lump in my throat. Kaiden was next, and then Mackey and some of the other sophomores. Each of them offered their words of support, each of them reminding me why I’d loved football so much, for as long as I could remember.
Because it was more than just a game.
It was more than the high of the win or the pain of the loss. It was brotherhood, and family, and knowing you had each other’s backs no matter what.
“Hey.” Hailee appeared at my side when the guys finally let me have some space. “Are you okay?”
“Actually yeah, I am.” I kissed her, not caring who could see us, earning us another round of applause. Her fingers twisted into my jersey and when she pulled away, the cutest blush was smattered along her cheeks. “Oh God, that was so embarrassing,” she murmured.
“You’re a Raider now,” I said fighting a smirk as I tucked her into my side, guiding us over to Jase, Ash, and Felicity.
“I guess I can thank the two of you for the warm welcome?” I asked the guys.
“We just want you to know the team are behind you one hundred and ten percent. Whatever you decide, we’ve got your back,” Ash said.
“Always,” Jase added and I don’t know who was more shocked. Asher, me, or Hailee.
“Yeah, yeah,” he grumbled. “Don
’t get too used to it. I’m still the cold-hearted bastard you all love to hate.” His hard gaze skirted over to Felicity who pretended not to notice.
But I noticed.
I only hoped Hailee didn’t because I didn’t want tonight to end in drama. I wanted to enjoy the moment—my friends, my team, and my girlfriend co-existing in one of my favorite places.
After weeks of uncertainty, of feeling pulled in different directions, I finally felt like I could breathe. And I knew it was largely down to Hailee. She made all the other shit disappear. She kept me sane in the quiet moments, the moments where my thoughts turned dark and went to places I didn’t want to be.
And although it was early days, I knew I didn’t want to be anywhere she wasn’t.
Without thinking, I jumped up on the nearest empty booth and waited for the place to go silent. Hailee stared up at me as if I’d lost my mind. And maybe I had, but if life had taught me anything over the last couple of weeks, it was that you never knew what was around the corner.
“I just want to say a few words.”
My teammates all made a ruckus, stamping on the floor and banging on tables.
“Show the guy some respect,” Jerry yelled from his position behind the bar, and I gave him an appreciative nod.
When everyone hushed, I continued, “At the beginning of this week, I’ll be honest, I didn’t know if I’d ever put on my jersey again. Football is important to me, but it’s not everything. Family is what matters.” My eyes found my best friends. “Friendship, having each other’s backs, being there when things hit rock bottom, that’s what makes being a Raider special. Is the thrill of the win, addictive? Hell yeah, it is. But it’s knowing that if you lose, if your dreams go up in flames in front of your eyes, that you’ll still have a team, a family, there to shoulder the burden with you.
“By now, you all probably know my family had some bad news recently. And it made me question everything I thought I knew. But regardless of what the next few weeks bring, one thing’s for certain, I’ll always be a Raider. And I couldn’t think of a better team to win State with.”