by Amy Clipston
Jay strode over to them. “Are you ready to go?”
“Ya.” Sharon snapped her fingers when she recalled what she’d wanted to ask them all. “On Friday we’re hosting another supper for a group of Englishers. I was wondering if you would all come and help me sing for them.”
“That would be fun. I’ll even come early to help. I’ll ask mei mamm to be sure I’m free,” Alice said.
Darlene gave a tentative smile. “I’d love to, but I’ll have to see how mei mamm is doing.”
“I’ll check my schedule,” Cal said.
Andrew nodded. “I’ll do the same.”
“Great.” Sharon turned to Jay, who wore an unreadable expression. “Do you think you can come?”
He hesitated for a moment, and then he said, “We can talk about it in the buggy.”
“Okay.” She nodded, but she was curious. Then she turned to her friends. “I’ll see you all soon. Be careful going home.”
They all said good-bye before climbing into the buggies and heading their separate ways.
“Did you enjoy singing for Earl?” Sharon asked as Jay’s horse and buggy moved down the street.
“I did.” Jay nodded as he glanced at her, then cleared his throat. “So tell me . . . Why do you sing for Englishers?”
She paused, surprised by the question. “Because I love singing, and it’s a way to share the gospel.” She took in his serious expression. “Does that bother you? You didn’t say anything earlier when I told you about it.”
He stared out the windshield as she admired his handsome profile.
“I . . . I guess I didn’t hear you. I was working up the courage to ask you to be my girlfriend.” He smiled, but his smile quickly faded. “I’m just not sure it’s a gut idea to sing for them.”
“Why wouldn’t it be?”
He gave a half shrug, lifting one shoulder. “I just feel our singing is for our community, not something we should share.”
She blinked as his words rolled around in her mind. She opened her mouth to protest his words but then pressed her lips together. He was entitled to his opinion, even if she didn’t understand it.
“You told me before that you serve baked chicken at these meals you host,” Jay said. “What else do you like to serve?”
He was changing the subject. Maybe he just needed some time to think over her request. Surely he’d see her point and come around.
“Barbecue meat loaf, or sometimes a casserole or roast beef . . .” Sharon continued talking about menus as he maneuvered his buggy toward her house. But disappointment over what he’d said weighed on her shoulders.
Jay halted the horse near her back porch and then turned to her. “May I walk you to the door?”
“That would be nice.”
They climbed out of the buggy, and when he threaded his fingers in hers, goose bumps traveled up her arm.
Once they reached the back door, he smiled down at her. “I had a nice afternoon.” He ran his finger down her cheek.
“I did too.”
He leaned down, and her breath stalled in her lungs. She was about to receive her first kiss! Jay’s lips brushed her cheek, and she sucked in a breath at the brief contact.
“I’ll see you soon,” he whispered in her ear, sending shivers cascading down her back.
“Good night, Jay.” The words came in a rush.
He gave her hand a gentle squeeze before loping down the steps.
Soon his horse and buggy were headed toward the road, and she leaned back against the doorjamb and released an excited yelp. She couldn’t be more thrilled as happiness rained down on her.
Chapter Six
“My friends and I would like to sing for you while you enjoy your dessert,” Sharon said as she stood in front of the group of sixteen Englishers Friday evening. They were eating either peanut butter or lemon meringue pie—or a slice of both.
Sharon had been excited when her mother told her another large group was coming, and the meal had gone almost perfectly. Andrew and Cal arrived early enough to set up the tables and chairs while Alice and Darlene helped finish preparing the meal.
They were ready for the guests when they came around five o’clock. Each of the visitors had been pleasant and showered them with compliments. The roast beef, baked potatoes, corn, egg noodles, and salad had all been a hit. So had their desserts.
But disappointment nipped at Sharon. Something was missing.
Jay hadn’t joined them. He’d stopped by to see her earlier in the week, but he didn’t mention the supper tonight, and neither had she. Surely their discussion about singing for Englishers wouldn’t have kept him away.
“What are you going to sing?” Ruby Sue asked, pulling Sharon from her thoughts.
Sharon turned to her sister. “What do you suggest?”
Ruby Sue touched her chin. “How about ‘Take My Hand, Precious Lord’? Your freinden should know the words.”
“Oh ya,” Mamm chimed in. “That’s one of my favorites.”
“Okay.” Still thinking of Jay, Sharon forced a smile. “You start, Ruby Sue. You can do it.”
A flicker of panic crossed her sister’s face, but when Sharon told the guests they were about to sing, Ruby Sue cleared her throat and began.
Sharon and her friends all joined in, and their little choir filled the kitchen with the Lord’s praises.
If only Jay were standing beside her, offering his voice too.
* * *
“I think that went well,” Cal said as he folded a table later that evening.
“It did.” Mamm washed, while Alice dried. “Danki for helping us. I’ll give you each some of the profits.”
“You don’t need to do that,” Andrew said. “I just enjoyed spending time with you all. And I enjoyed your food.”
“That’s not right,” Sharon said, protesting as she set a stack of dried plates in a cabinet. “You all helped, so we can split it.”
Cal waved her off before picking up the table. “We’re just glad we could, right, Andrew?”
Andrew nodded before lifting another table and following Cal into the utility room.
“Are you okay?” Alice asked Sharon as she dried a glass.
“Ya, I am. I was just hoping Jay would come, although he never told me for sure that he would.” Sharon tried to shrug, but the disappointment ran deeper than she wanted to admit.
“You should check our voice mail,” Ruby Sue suggested as she swept the floor. “Maybe he left you a message.”
Sharon hesitated.
“Go now.” Mamm nodded toward the door. “See if he did.”
“Okay.” Sharon pulled on a sweater in the mudroom and then stepped out into the cool April night.
As her shoes crunched the rock path, she glanced up at the bright stars peppering the dark sky, and then she pointed the bright-yellow beam of the flashlight toward the phone shanty. Walking by one of the large barns, she spotted a lantern shining from where her father was settling their animals for the night.
She stepped into the small shanty and set the flashlight on the counter, then picked up the phone receiver and dialed for voice mail. She punched in the code and listened as a message began.
“Hi, this is for Sharon.” As Jay’s voice filled her ear, warmth swirled in her chest. “This is Jay. I’m sorry I won’t make it tonight. We got a rush order for three wooden benches for a local restaurant, and mei dat asked me to stay late. I hope your supper goes well. I’ll talk to you soon. Bye.”
As a voice told her they had no more messages, Sharon held the receiver against her chest. Disappointment stole her euphoria. While she was grateful to know that Jay had cared enough to call, she was still frustrated that he hadn’t come.
She made sure she’d deleted Jay’s message and then hurried back into the kitchen, where the men were restoring the wooden kitchen table and chairs to their rightful place as the women continued cleaning.
Ruby Sue stopped sweeping crumbs into her dustpan and looked at her.
“Did he call?”
“He did.” Sharon began slipping the rest of the leftovers into storage containers. “He had to work late because his dat took a big rush order for some wooden benches.”
“Oh.” Ruby Sue clucked her tongue. “Maybe he can come next time.”
“Ya, maybe.” Sharon turned toward her friends. “Would you all be willing to do this again?”
“Absolutely,” Cal said, and Andrew nodded in agreement as they each pushed a chair under the table.
“Just let me know when.” Alice set a handful of forks into a drawer.
“I can come if mei mamm is feeling okay,” Darlene said as she wiped down a counter.
“How is your mamm, Darlene?” Mamm asked.
Darlene shrugged. “Today was a bit better. Some days are worse than others.”
“Please let us know if you ever need anything,” Mamm said. “We mean that sincerely.”
“Danki, Feenie. And I’d definitely like to sing here again. This was fun.”
“I’m so grateful you all came.” As Sharon set a stack of containers in the propane-powered fridge, she thought about Jay. He was telling the truth about his father asking him to stay late at work. She was sure about that. But had the misgivings he expressed about singing for Englishers kept him away as well?
* * *
On Sunday afternoon two weeks later, Sharon pushed the porch swing into motion, closed her eyes, and breathed in the warm May air as she sat beside Jay on her back porch. Then she looked out to where the cows had all congregated in her father’s green pasture.
She picked up her glass of iced tea and glanced at Jay. He looked so handsome in his light-gray shirt and dark trousers. Smiling, she recalled how he’d stopped by to see her at least twice each week and called her every other day to see how she was doing. She felt close to him as they explored their new relationship, and she was excited to be his girlfriend.
Still, it bothered her that he hadn’t attended either of the suppers her family had hosted, even though their friends had. She longed to know if he still felt that singing for Englishers was wrong, but she’d been afraid to ask him. She was so happy about their relationship that she didn’t want to risk a disagreement—at least not yet.
“It’s the perfect afternoon.” Jay reached over and took her hand.
She smiled at him, but her question about the singings lingered at the back of her mind, threatening to steal her happy mood.
“And I’m very spoiled with this appeditlich German chocolate kuche.” He held up a plate with a large piece of the cake. “It’s superb.”
“I’m so froh you like it.”
He seemed to study her. “Was iss letz?”
“What do you mean?”
“I can tell something is bothering you.” He pointed to her forehead with his free hand. “Your skin puckers right there when you’re upset about something or you’re trying to figure something out. Which is it?” Concern flashed over his handsome face. “Have I done something to upset you?”
She looked down at her lap as she gathered her thoughts. Maybe she did need to get this out in the open. She met his gaze. “I’m not upset with you, but I don’t understand why you’ve never come when my family has hosted a supper.”
“I’ve told you. I’ve been working late filling rush orders for work. They just keep coming, and Dat needs my help.”
“I know.” She looked down at the skirt of her lavender dress and then up at his curious face. “I’m just disappointed that you can’t be here when the rest of our freinden are. I like it when we’re all together.”
He released her hand as he blew out a sigh, and a thread of worry twisted in her belly. She braced herself for some defensive words.
“Okay. I just still don’t know how I feel about singing for Englishers,” he began. “It feels wrong to me, and that’s another reason I’ve been staying away from your suppers.”
She nodded slowly. “But I still don’t understand why. How could singing about God’s glory ever be wrong?”
“Because we’re called to be separate from the world. Mei daadi used to talk about how serious it is for us to follow those rules. That’s what makes us Amish, and if we don’t keep our traditions for the next generation, we’ll cease to exist.” He gestured widely. “That’s why we don’t have electricity or phones in our homes.” He pointed at her dress. “And that’s why we dress the way we do and don’t drive cars. We’re separate. We’re Plain.”
“But what does that have to do with singing? Where in the Bible does it say we can’t sing for others?”
He shook his head. “You’re not hearing me.”
“I am, Jay.” Her voice rose with her frustration. “But I believe we should share the gospel, and I think singing hymns to people who may not be believers is a gut way to do that.”
“I disagree.” He rubbed his chin. “I think singing for Englishers is a performance that cheapens how we worship.”
She pressed her lips together but then responded. “I respect that we disagree, but I still want you to be a part of this. Won’t you please come?” She took his hand in hers. “Won’t you at least give it a try? You have such a nice voice. We sound so much better when we all sing together. Please, Jay? Please? For me?”
His lips twitched. “How can I resist that schee face?”
She lifted her eyebrows as a smile overtook her lips. “Does that mean you’ll give it a try?”
“Ya, if it makes you froh.”
“It does.” She nodded with such vigor that the ribbons from her prayer covering bounced off her shoulders. “We’re hosting one on Thursday.”
“Okay.” His smile faded as his gaze grew intense. Then he leaned forward and touched her lips with his, sending heat roaring through her veins. She leaned into the kiss, savoring it as her heart thrummed.
“I’ll do my best to be there.” His voice was husky next to her ear, and she shuddered with delight. “I really care about you, Sharon.”
“I’ve always cared about you.” She cupped her hand to his smooth cheek.
“I’m sorry I was blind for so long.”
He settled back on the swing, and she rested her head on his shoulder as contentment settled in her. She’d just received a real kiss from Jay Smoker! Oh, how she was blessed.
“I’ll ask mei dat if I can leave work early on Thursday,” he said. “Then I can help you set up for the meal too.”
“Danki.” She smiled up at him. Now the supper would be perfect!
* * *
“I think we’re ready,” Mamm said as she surveyed the folding tables set for the guests and platters that lined the kitchen table.
“Everything looks and smells wunderbaar, Feenie,” Alice said as she stood beside Sharon. “I think it’s going to be a great meal.”
Sharon leaned back against the counter and folded her arms over her chest as she looked at Cal, Andrew, and Alice. She’d hoped tonight would be perfect, but it wasn’t.
First, she’d burned an entire sheet of oatmeal raisin cookies just before her friends arrived, and the smell still lingered in the kitchen despite the open windows and the delicious scent of pot roast mixed with chocolate chip cookies and banana bread.
To make matters worse, Darlene’s mother had a bad day, which meant that Darlene and her family were having a challenging time, and she had to stay home. And then Jay didn’t show up. Maybe his father couldn’t let him go early after all, but Sharon had to wonder if Jay would find some excuse not to come even if he had.
“He’ll be here,” Alice whispered as if she could read her thoughts. “He was probably just delayed. You know this is his busiest time of year at work, and he has to help his dat.”
Sharon sighed. “I know.”
Alice gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze. “Don’t give up faith.”
Soon the guests arrived, and Sharon helped serve the meal after her mother went through the introductions.
She tried to focus on their guests, but her eyes kep
t moving to the windows as she hoped to catch a glimpse of Jay.
* * *
Jay looked at the clock on the wall and ground his teeth. He was late, very late, for the supper at Sharon’s house. Guilt crawled onto his shoulder and dug its talons into his already sore muscles. He’d hoped to leave early, but then his father received the rush order for three wishing wells from the motel on Old Philadelphia Pike, just after most of the carpenters had left for the evening. Out of loyalty to his father, Jay had offered to stay despite his promise to Sharon.
He had to get to her house before he broke her heart. He had to make sure Sharon knew she was his priority, or he might run the risk of losing her. The notion sent icy fear slicing through him.
He set his tools in his toolbox and then made his way to the office at the front of the shop, where his father sat at a desk staring at a stack of paperwork. With dark-brown eyes, graying brown hair, and a matching beard, Dat had always reminded Jay of his paternal grandfather.
Oh, how he missed his daadi! He had always been around to help Jay with a project or talk about anything from God to their friends in the community. His grandfather had been a mentor alongside his father when he was learning to build the wooden creations they sold at the store. Daadi had always been there when he needed him.
“Dat,” Jay said, and his father jumped with a start as he looked up. “I didn’t mean to disturb you, but I’m late for a supper at Sharon’s haus.”
“Oh.” Dat looked at the clock on the wall above his desk and then back at Jay. “Why didn’t you tell me you had plans for tonight?”
“I wanted to help you with that wishing well order, but I’m really running late. Is it okay if I just come in early tomorrow?”
“Ya, ya.” Dat waved him off. “You go. Be safe on the road.”
“Danki.” Jay hustled out of the shop and toward their house, which was behind the store. He had to get changed and hurry to Sharon’s. He just hoped she would forgive him for being late.
* * *
After the Englishers had finished their supper, Sharon, Alice, and Ruby Sue brought out the desserts while her mother answered questions about their community.