by RH Tucker
“Cindy, come on. What is this?”
“Just answer the question, Jackson. Would you have?”
“I don’t know,” I reply. My words force her to open her eyes and meet mine. “I’d like to say no. That’s a huge hang-up I have had for a long time, but it’s not the only thing I think about. Your parents have given you a life that I don’t know I can. I’ll never be a doctor or go to school and be a therapist like you want to be. I’m not gonna have some fancy job. I’ll probably just inherit the family business. A small deli that some months does good and some months barely breaks even. Why do you think my mom works?”
She lets out a small chuckle, shaking her head. “You don’t know what I want. And you don’t know my parents.”
“No, but I know what you deserve. And they provide that. All I got is the hand I’m dealt.”
“And if I told you that’d be enough? Would you believe that?”
Raising my brows, I lean my head back and look up at the stars. I wish it could be enough. I wish all I had to do was tell her I’ll love her, even if we have to live in a small studio apartment, and not some lavish five-bedroom home that’s she’s always known with her family. That my little Toyota might be the only car I can ever afford, and I wouldn’t ever be able to afford a nice vehicle, especially like the one her parents got her as a sixteenth birthday present.
As if reading my mind, she answers for me. “Why not? Why can’t that be enough?”
“Because you deserve better that just enough. All I can give you is average, and you deserve a lot more than that.”
She nods and I let out one more sigh. Finally, she’s understanding.
“You think you know so much, Jacks, but you don’t.”
“Haven’t you been paying attention? I literally don’t know much. All I know is that you deserve more than I can give you.”
Catching me off guard, she grabs my hand. Even more unexpected is her placing my palm over her chest. Through the soft, yellow shirt she’s wearing, I can feel her heartbeat. It’s racing.
“Read my heart.”
“Uh …” I twist my head sideways, unsure what’s happening and what she means.
“Come on, you took weeks of this class. Read my heart.”
“Um, yeah, that’s not exactly how the class worked.” I let out a flabbergasted chuckle.
Keeping her hands over mine, still pressed against her, she takes a step closer. “You can’t. And not because you have difficulty reading.” Though said with no malice, her words force me to look away. Letting go of my hand, she holds my face. “I don’t care what you can and can’t read, Jackson. But you should. Not something in a book, or a note in a class, but you should care about the things you can’t read, like my heart. Like my thoughts.”
“Cindy—”
“Because if you could read them, then you’d know I don’t care about you misspelling things when you text me. And you’d know that it wouldn’t matter to me if you have trouble reading a menu, whether it’s at some high-class restaurant or through a fast-food drive-thru. But most importantly, you’d know I don’t care what you can or can’t provide in life, because that doesn’t matter.”
“You say that, but—”
“A week after I graduated high school, my mom left my dad.” She pauses and the silence drifts between us. The revelation leaves me blank. “She told me the day she left that she hadn’t been happy for a long time. Years. It wasn’t because he did something bad, it was just her. She didn’t want to be there anymore, but she stayed. Until she felt like she didn’t need to anymore.”
I return the embrace with her, holding her closer. A small tear leaks out, and I brush it away with my thumb, caught even more off guard. She’s never been this emotional with me.
“I thought things were perfect at home. All the way up until the day she left, I had no idea. And now my dad is miserable. He has some good days, but he just seems lost. All because she broke his heart, and he never even knew it. She stayed with him for years, pretending to love him. Who knows, maybe on some level she still had some kind of feelings for him, but—”
Her words cut off and I brush away more tears. Every petty argument we’ve had in the past is a distant memory, as I stand holding her. Wishing there was something I could do to take away the hurt. “Cindy, I’m sorry.”
“When I tell you all that material crap means nothing, I mean it. Because what good is having nice things, if I’m not with someone I love? Having someone’s heart is far more important to me than having the keys to a nice car. I’ve seen your heart, Jackson. That’d be enough for me. Would mine be enough for you?”
Staring at me, her eyes glisten, and she waits for my answer. Her petite frame leans against my body, and I remember the times we spent together. And the best memories aren’t when we were out with friends, or we went to a movie, or I followed her around the mall while she shopped. The best memories were the times when we had nothing. Just each other and we’d be in one another’s arms, not worrying about what tomorrow brings, only focusing on those moments between us.
My lips slam into hers. It feels like forever since I’ve kissed her, and as if we’re making up for lost time, she holds me tighter.
When we’d argue, I’d always know it was over the stupidest things. But I couldn’t get over it. With my secret gone, along with one she’s apparently had, I have no idea what could happen in the future. But feeling her lips against mine, it reminds me of all of the good. The good I always doubted in the past could last, since I was never honest enough about myself with her.
Breaking apart, her hot breath swims over my lips, as I stare down at hers, which are now swollen.
“Always,” I whisper. “You’ll always be enough for me.”
A tiny smile comes over her.
“Aww!” We both glance over at the door, and Veronica stands there, her hands locked together, and her eyes glistening. “Finally!”
“Veron—” Micah’s word is cut off as he pushes the door open and then sees me holding Cindy. “Sorry. I told her not to.”
He tugs at her arm, laughing, but she pulls away. “No way. I needed to see this through to the end. They’ve been off and on since before you and I started going out.”
I can’t help but let out a laugh. “What can I say? It takes me a while to learn stuff.”
“Don’t worry.” Cindy pulls me closer, lowering her voice. “I’ve got other stuff I can teach you.”
“I’m sure you do.”
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About the Author
RH Tucker lives in Southern California and writes character-driven stories with people who have real heart. At least, he tries to.
He also consumes too much caffeine, eats too much pizza, and firmly believes Rocky Road is the best flavor of ice cream.
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Also by RH Tucker
The Rumor Has It series
Rumor Has It
True to You
Courting the Nerd (short story)
Heart Shaped Lock
Through the Layers
Piece by Piece
Also Available
Rumor Has It Box Set
BOOKS 1-5
or reading books on Archive.