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by Sarah Addison-Fox


  Carl snorted and swaggered towards the door, the two men trailing behind him. The one closest to Kade sent him furtive looks, as if waiting to get hit again.

  For a second Kade thought his problems were solved until he walked in and saw what was drying above the fireplace, and his heart sank.

  The old man was in the process of ramming pouches of cloth into a sack, far too much for just a supply to be used to treat headaches and toothache like Ben did.

  This was bigger, and far worse than he could ever have imagined. The amount drying and covering the tables and bench was enough to drug and subdue hundreds of men for weeks. Worst of all, Thomas had somehow been caught in the middle of it all.

  Carl was already accepting a drink and easing himself into a chair, playing the part a little too well for Kade’s liking.

  Kade shook his head as the old man offered him a cup of something that smelled like it should be used to strip paint. “Still nursing a hangover from last night.”

  The old man nodded sagely. “You lads are looking for a supplier?”

  Carl answered. “We were. But if we can get out from under his thumb, be high time. We need a new employer. One who doesn’t have so many rules about what we do on our own time.”

  The man Carl had slugged exchanged a look with the younger, now drinking the same foul brew Carl was. “Our employer don’t have no problems with any of us doing what we want, long as we bring the product and follow his orders while we camp.”

  Kade nodded, a little concerned that Carl seemed entirely relaxed here. “What does he pay?”

  A greasy smile appeared on the man’s face. “Food and lodgings, plus a silver coin when we bring new recruits in.”

  Kade’s stomach twitched as he caught the meaning. “New recruits to do what?”

  Please don’t say retrieving.

  The man’s eyes narrowed slightly before his gaze slid to Carl as he stretched out his empty mug. “Who cares. Long as we don’t have to listen to the sanctimonious rubbish coming out of our boss’s mouth anymore, I’m in.”

  Kade’s eyebrows shot up as Carl slouched back, his cup refilled. He seemed genuinely interested. Either he was already half cut, or he’d forgotten why they were here.

  To set his mind at rest, he dropped a few hints as he spoke, looking for confirmation Carl wasn’t getting too carried away and really considering leaving the Stormers. “I’m not jumping into anything; I’d need to see the set-up, meet the boss, and see if we’re a good fit first.”

  Carl nodded vaguely, but it was enough. As long as he didn’t drink any more of the axle grease he was pouring down his throat, they’d make it out still on top of things.

  The old man squinted at him. “How much you need? An ounce?”

  Kade gulped and managed what he hoped was a confident grin as he dug in his pocket for the coin Cester had given him for expenses. A shudder of disgust twinged in his middle at the greed on the man’s face as he snatched the coins away.

  As he settled back in his chair and tried to feign interest as Carl started joking about his favourite subject—girls—his thoughts sped around his head.

  They may be on the right path, but how far would they have to go before they found out the truth? The old man handed him a pouch, and he stuffed it in his pocket, saying he’d smoke it later, and focused on trying to look for an opening to find out where the camp was exactly.

  His mind buzzed with the desire to ask questions, but if he pushed too hard, he’d make them suspicious and blow their chances.

  He needed to prove he was on their side, relax, and maybe they’d drink enough to loosen their tongues? He didn’t refuse the drink the next time it was offered, his face contorting as he forced it down.

  As he kept his posture as unthreatening as possible and while Carl talked with the older, Kade kept an ear on the conversation, pleased Carl seemed to be making headway, asking the right questions, but making sure he didn’t come across as too eager.

  Kade grimaced as he swallowed another gulp, his throat burning while he struggled to reconcile everything he’d learned.

  New problems had sprung up, just as the old ones had been plugged. He chewed on each one, his mind catching on the biggest and most probably the hardest to solve. Hadley and Thomas.

  Chapter Seven

  Hadley slumped in the chair, eyes locked on Thomas as the healer, the gardener’s wife, settled in alongside her. Gertrude, or Gerty as she’d insisted Hadley call her, was blustering around Thomas and the nameless boy who were both still staring blankly.

  Tired of waiting for the two Stormers to come back, Luna had curled up in a ball and snored softly, occasionally opening an eye as if checking on Hadley.

  If she weren’t so worried about Thomas, Hadley would have been more concerned about Kade’s absence, but out of the two men she cared most for, Kade seemed the lesser of the worry.

  Gerty sat heavily on a chair and shared a look with Amy; Terry had taken a seat in the corner when his wife arrived and was reading a heavy bound book by the light of the oil lanterns. “Be a few more hours till they come out of it,” Gerty said.

  Hadley swallowed, her eyes filling again. “What will happen then?”

  Gerty sighed as her slight shoulders lifted. “I expect they’ll be irritable and wanting nothing more than to get their hands on the next lot.”

  Hadley winced as Gerty’s expression turned fierce. “That old Geoff has a lot to answer for. Tis one thing to grow poppies for healing purposes, another to bring trouble to Ramshead.”

  Amy leaned forward closer to Hadley. “Why hasn’t no one driven him out then?”

  Gerty shook her head. “I’m sure I don’t know. But he’s as much to blame for these poor lad’s condition as those other two that keep coming, bringing boys back through this way.”

  Hadley fought the tears and the despair, focussing instead on why they were all here. “Have you seen Thomas here before?”

  Gerty gave her a puzzled frown, before she narrowed her gaze. “Who’s this Thomas?”

  Hadley swallowed hard and gestured to where Thomas was swaying ever so slightly as he slouched in his chair. “That’s my brother. He went missing from Kingsport.”

  Gerty’s lips pursed, her wrinkled forehead bunching into a frown. “There’s been talk of that happening; he’s a long way from home then.”

  Hadley nodded briskly, impatience and worry gnawing at her. “Has Thomas been here a lot of times before? With two other men?”

  Gerty nodded solemnly. “I’ve seen him slinking around with a pair of rough looking ones; they change around, but always the same older man brings a few boys when they come looking for Geoff’s opium.”

  Amy gasped and grabbed hold of Hadley’s arm. Her eyes wide. “Me Ma says that’s what done made me Da run off. Got so he couldn’t get through a day without smoking a pipe of it.”

  Hadley’s heart sank. A crushing pain stole her breath as Thomas moaned slightly. The tears spilled over despite her desire not to cry anymore; she swiped at her eyes.

  Terry’s voice startled her as his chair creaked as he leaned forward. “Don’t you worry, lass; ten days, he’ll start to get back to being yer brother again. If anyone can get it out of his body, my Gerty can.”

  He grinned at her, revealing gums were teeth should be. “Plus, the Ancient One is the source of all healing, ye know, and I’ll be keeping ye brother in me prayers.”

  Hadley nearly groaned aloud. Another follower? The Ancient religion seemed to be growing. Or had it always been there, and she’d just never noticed?

  Another thought smacked her as she stared at Thomas, now absentmindedly rubbing his shin. Ten days.

  Gerty rolled her eyes and patted her arm. “Don’t you worry; he’ll be sick as a dog, as well his mate, and we’ll need a little of Geoff’s awful stuff to wean him off like a babe.”

  Hadley’s chin wavered as she nodded. “He needs to stay here?”

  Gerty slid a look at Amy, her lips pressing together
, the answer slow in coming. “Things could get a mite messy in here; I can’t see your ma being too happy to have that going on in here.”

  Amy paled a little, and she swallowed thickly. “As long as they can pay I don’t reckon she can turn ‘em out. And I’ve seen some of the worse things a body can do. I can help.”

  Hadley sniffed, and Amy turned slightly, a warm smile on her face. “Let me go talk to Ma; I’ll be right back.” Amy’s smile was less certain as she stood in the doorway, one hand on the surround, as she peered back into the room. “I’ll bring more lamp oil up; looks like we be needin’ it tonight.”

  Amy slipped out the door, and Hadley could just make out the light footfalls as she carried on down the passageway.

  Luna whined, her head cocked as she checked Hadley was still there before dropping her head back and closing her eyes.

  Gerty sighed loudly and rubbed at her back as she looked pointedly at her. “I’m gonna be needin’ a few items; you got coin to pay me as well as the room here?”

  Terry scoffed. “Stop being so money hungry, old woman; the Ancient provides enough for us, so we can give t’others.”

  Gerty squinted at her husband and waved her hand in front of his face. “Don’t keep harping and using yer fancy words from that there book; practical help, that’s what this girly needs, not words.”

  Terry grinned and wrapped his hands around the book, hugging it close to him before sending Hadley a wink. “She’s just miffed ‘cause she can’t read a jot.”

  Gerty snorted. “Am not.”

  Hadley slumped in her chair, losing interest in the bickering couple, her attention on Thomas again as she watched for the slightest sign he was coming out of whatever fog he was under.

  By the time the door opened, she’d effectively tuned out the old couple the same way she tuned out Carl’s flirtations. Luna sprang to her feet, pulling her back to awareness.

  Carl swayed heavily in the doorway and winked at her. “Hey, lovely lady, old people,” he slurred as he tipped an imaginary hat towards Terry and Gerty.

  Kade growled as Carl slunk in the room, stumbling slightly as he crashed into a seat. Kade cast a look at Gerty and Terry, an uneasy smile on his lips as they stared openly at his weapons still strapped across his chest. “Eh, thanks for coming up here; let me know what we owe you.”

  Gerty nodded and folded her arms over her chest. Her eyes locked on Carl as he yawned loudly. “Amy’s finding out if you can stay here. Arrangements need to be made, but I’ll not deal with drunkards, and I’ll take two coins for me trouble, Stormer.”

  Kade nodded and handed her a couple coins from his own pocket and not Cester’s pouch he’d given them for expenses.

  Hadley’s cheeks flooded with heat at the realisation he was paying for Thomas’s care. Her heart sped even faster as his gaze found hers, and his voice softened. “Could I speak to you outside?”

  Hadley shot a look at Carl who, despite his inebriation, raised a hand. “Go ahead; I’ll be here talking to the olds.”

  Kade shook his head, but Terry only chuckled despite Gerty’s irritation. “You been drinking at Geoff’s? That smile be wiped off come morning light.”

  Carl only shrugged lazily, his eyes sliding to Kade. “Probably, but we got what we needed, right, cuz?”

  Kade nodded vaguely, his hand already on the door handle, his eyes on her. “Just a few words, without an audience.”

  Hadley caught his meaning and got to her feet. Speaking to no one in particular, she said, “I’ll be right back.”

  The second she closed the door her resolve to not cry anymore tonight faded at the tender look Kade sent her way.

  After all these months of waiting, not knowing what had happened to Thomas, he was in the next room, completely unaware of her presence. And she had no one she could depend on. Except for Kade.

  Hadley’s face crumpled, her eyes flooding and shoulders shaking, letting Kade know she was about to let rip. He swallowed hard as footsteps came from the stairwell.

  Amy and her mother’s voices echoed upwards. From the snatches he caught, most likely they were discussing the new arrivals and what to do with them. Hadley’s head tilted towards the stairs, a panicked look in her eye. “You want to go somewhere else?”

  Hadley nodded and sniffed. “I just need a minute.”

  Kade nodded, and opened the door behind him, not noticing he’d opened the door to Hadley’s room. She trailed inside and before he could stop her, she threw her arms around him and began crying softly.

  Kade winced and pulled away. Her eyes widened, and tears tracked down her cheeks. “I can’t hug you? Because we’re alone?”

  He held her teary gaze, rejection and hurt seared across her face. His head jammed with the correct response. She shouldn’t be hugging him. But what could he do? Leave her to sob? What kind of a heartless bastard would he be to push her away?

  He ran a hand over his face, then without a thought, his fingers fumbled as he unsnapped the buckles on the straps holding his daggers strapped against his chest.

  Kade offered her a shrug as they thudded to the floor. He reached his arms around her, pulling her into him. “Thought you’d prefer this.”

  She relaxed her body, and her shoulders shook, sobs muffled against his chest. He stroked her hair soundlessly, waiting for her to calm down.

  His chin rested on the top of her head, and his chest ached with the desire to comfort her. What could he possibly offer her that would help?

  Nothing. There was nothing he could do. Nothing he could say that would take the pain away. And even worse, what needed to be said would make things even worse for her.

  So, he held her, murmuring into her hair until she looked up at him, and the floor shifted beneath him. He didn’t care about Cester’s rules in that moment. He didn’t care that Thomas was in the next room; he didn’t care about anything or anyone else.

  When she kissed him, he didn’t fight it. He drank her in, savouring her, relishing the feel of her until the warning sparked in his mind that always did when he got too close to something he didn’t want to lose.

  His voice was too rough as he locked eyes with her. “I have to tell you something you won’t like.”

  Hadley swallowed thickly, her voice cracking as she spoke. “You’re leaving me here.”

  Kade released a sigh. “I’ll make sure everything’s taken care of here. Amy will be good company, and I’ll leave you money in case you need anything.”

  Hadley pulled back a little, a deep frown growing on her forehead. “I don’t have any way of paying you back.”

  Kade cupped her chin and pressed his forehead against hers. “I know.”

  Hadley sucked in a breath, her cheeks flushing, fresh tears appearing, before she gripped the back of his neck. “Why would you do that for me?”

  His heart thumped against his ribs as she pulled him closer, kissing him until his head spun, and the words slipped from his mouth. “Because I’m nuts about you.”

  Hadley cocked her head, the smile snagging slightly, the frown reappearing as she pulled back a little. “You are?”

  Kade flinched, a knot of worry building that she didn’t share the intensity of his feelings. “I am.”

  Hadley inhaled sharply before she looked through her lashes, a coy smile playing at her lips. “Is that how a Stormer says I love you?”

  His heart stuttered so he took the easy way out and kissed her again; this time she moaned a little, causing his veins to fire.

  With a crooked smile, Hadley pulled out of his arms and straightened her shoulders. Her voice deadly serious. “I need you to promise you’ll come back to me.”

  His chest constricted as he worked his jaw. “I can’t; don’t ask me to.”

  Hadley shook her head, anger flashing over her face that he didn’t understand. “I can’t watch you leave, thinking you might not come back. I can’t do that; promise me, promise me you won’t break my heart?”

  Kade swallowed, his throat
thickening as he scrambled to provide her with an answer. “I can’t promise.”

  Hadley’s chin wobbled, but she held his gaze, blinking rapidly, her voice shaking as she spoke. “Please come back to me.”

  Kade stepped closer, but when held her again, she was stiff in his embrace. “I promise to be careful, alright? I promise to do everything in my power to not get hurt, and I promise I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.”

  It wasn’t enough he knew. But it was all he could offer. Hadley sagged in his arms, a desperate-sounding sigh releasing. “I can’t lose you, too.”

  Kade flinched, her words so close to his own fear. Was that why they were attracted to each other? Were they both so similar, bruised and so terrified to open themselves up to more pain? “I’d never leave you on your own if I didn’t have to,” he murmured into her hair.

  She looked up at him, and he knew he was in deep, deep trouble when she kissed him again. His mind fizzled and popped as his hands tightened around her waist.

  All the rational parts of his brain ceased to work as every thought was crowded out by the knowledge this might be the last night he might spend with her. By the gods, I’m weak.

  Her hands slipped to his belt, tugging at his shirt till it was bunched in her hands and cool air met his skin. Her soft fingers trailed across his lower back, sending shivers that burned white hot down his flesh.

  He stumbled, off balance as her body drove him backwards as she aggressively steered him until his spine was flush against the wall and their limbs were tangled together.

  His thoughts were meshed somewhere between crushing pain and guilty pleasure as he kissed her as though he might never get another chance.

  He wanted to tell her, wanted to show her the words he couldn’t speak, the words he was too cowardly to say. Words he’d never known he’d want to tell someone ever again. I love you.

  Too caught in the moment as her body pressed into his and her urgency increased, Kade failed to the register the whisper of movement as the door opened a crack.

  Hadley’s squeak as she broke off this kiss was the moment he became aware of Carl in the doorway, swaying as he stared wide-eyed at them.

 

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