by Molly O'Hare
Olive shrugged slightly. “Oh, whatever do you mean?”
Her words caused his smile to spread from ear to ear. Olive never ceased to amaze him. Leave it to her to show up wearing a shirt like that to a cookout with a group of men that made it an art form of ragging on people. The wide smile on her face indicating she was ready for battle, had him smirking.
Brave girl.
Stupid girl.
But, nonetheless his brave stupid girl.
As he scanned her one more time, his heart swelled. That’s what she was.
His girl.
Even if she didn’t realize it.
“What took you so long?” Lucas yelled from across the park where the grill was set up. “Did you lose your keys again, Tank?”
“I bet it was his cell phone,” Rick hollered.
“Nah, he probably lost his wallet!” Tim shouted.
Hank shook his head. “Fuck off.” He placed his hand on the small of Olive’s back before lightly pushing her toward his friends. “I didn’t lose anything.” He smirked their way. “I just like to take my time.”
“Take your time my ass.” Rick laughed, while he flipped a burger on the grill.
Before Hank could respond, Olive’s voice broke through the chatter. “Not true, he lost his keys,” she announced joyfully ratting him out.
“Is that how you want to play this, Olive Oil?” Hank looked down at Olive, his brow raised.
Olive crossed her arms over her chest. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“That’s one.”
Her eyes widened. “One what?”
“That’s two.”
Olive took a step back. “Hold your horses there. What in the world does that even mean?”
Hank matched her movements before blocking her from the view of his buddies. He leaned into her frame before the corners of his mouth turned up. “You know exactly what that means, babe. It’s a promise.” He raised his right palm showing her his hand.
Olive’s mouth fell open before her gaze narrowed on him. “I’ll strangle you,” she growled.
Hank shrugged. “We can make it three.”
“Tank, leave the poor girl alone. No one wants to be crowded by your dumbass.” Lucas laughed before pushing Hank out of the way. “It’s nice to see you again, Olive. How’ve you been?”
Hank watched as Olive’s eyes morphed from anger towards him to joy as she looked at Lucas. “Life could be better.” She pointed at Hank. “I have him as a roommate.”
Lucas threw his head back as he held his stomach and laughed.
Oh, she was gonna get it. When Olive looked back at him, he mouthed ‘four’ which caused her lips to thin before turning on her heel to get away from him in a huff.
Damn, he loved her.
Now if only he could get her to realize that.
“Nice shirt,” Rick remarked when Olive made her way towards the grill. “Do you believe in Bigfoot?”
As Hank followed behind her, he did his best to hold down the excitement of the show that he knew was about to begin.
Olive placed her hands on her hips ready for a fight.
Oh, this is about to get good.
“Of course, I do.” She looked Rick up and down. “Don’t you?”
Tim stood next to Rick. “Not on your life, sweet cheeks.”
“What he said.” Rick pointed at Tim.
When Olive took a step closer to them while puffing her chest out to appear bigger than she really was, it took everything inside of Hank not to fall onto the floor laughing.
“Well, why not?” Olive placed her hands on her hips. “Give me one example of why you think Bigfoot isn’t real?”
“If Bigfoot were real we’d have evidence,” Rick remarked while Tim nodded his agreement.
“We do have evidence. Haven’t you heard of the footprints, the random stray hair that is found, or what about the noises?”
Olive took a small step towards his friends, causing Hank’s gut to clench as he kept in is laughter. Oh, shit, you can’t make this stuff up. I’m gonna break a rib.
“Where’s the body then, sweet cheeks? If there were a Bigfoot around we’d have found its bones by now.”
“Exactly,” Rick agreed with Tim. “And, might I add if there really were a Bigfoot, I would have shot him already. Plus, I majored in biology in college, so I’d know.”
Tim turned toward Rick. “Didn’t you used to hunt with your dad? Don’t you think you would have seen him if he were real?”
Hank watched as Olive’s eyes narrowed. “Bigfoot probably saw you coming and ran the other way. No creature wants to be near stupid.”
Hank couldn’t hold it in anymore, this time he burst out laughing. He turned to Rick and Tim, with his hand placed on his stomach trying to control his laughter. “I told you she was feisty.”
“You need to bring her around more,” Lucas said, standing next to Hank as they watch the scene play out. “She’ll make our get-togethers a hell of a lot more entertaining.
“Trust me, I know.”
Olive turned toward him. “Hank, you believe in Bigfoot, right?”
“Yes, Hank.” Rick nodded his head toward him. “Please explain to your girlfriend there is no logical way in hell there is a Bigfoot.”
Is this real life? This can’t be happening right now? Hank shook his head. He was smarter than to go against the person that was sleeping with him. He shrugged. “Sure, why not,” he answered the exact same time Olive yelled, “I’m not his girlfriend.”
Olive took a step back from the group, her eyes held the same panic he saw in the SUV when he kissed her.
Tim’s face twisted in surprise. “Hank, you really believe in Bigfoot?”
Hank hadn’t really put much thought into it before, but if Olive was adamant there was a big hairy creature roaming the earth, then fine, he’d believe it too. “Why not? You said there isn’t any evidence that Bigfoot is real, but there also isn’t any evidence that Bigfoot isn’t real.”
“Hang on,” Olive chimed in, throwing her hands in the air. “Can we please go back to the fact I am not his girlfriend? I’m his doormat roommate that somehow was forced into coming to this thing.”
“You didn’t want to hang out with us?” Lucas placed his hand over his chest. “That hurts, doll.”
Olive blinked a few times caught off guard. “No.” When Lucas raised his brow she tried to backpedal. “It’s not that I didn’t want to come, I swear. It’s just that I don’t really like to come to these type of things.”
Lucas nodded his head. “So, you didn’t want to be here with us. That’s what it sounds like you’re saying.”
Hank watched as Olive struggled. Was it wrong for him to find so much joy in this? Probably.
He knew the guys were ruthless and once they found something to hone in on, it was like open season.
He’d give it another minute before he’d step in.
“Do you think we’re not fun?” Tim asked. “You thought we’d be boring, right?”
“Yeah.” Rick cocked his head to watch her. “Did you think if you came out with us you’d have a lousy time?”
“No. No, not at all.” Olive took another step back before sending Hank a pleading glance.
Show time.
Hank cracked his knuckles before moving to stand beside her. “Of course Olive didn’t want to hang out with you numb-nuts. Why would she?”
“Who are you calling a numb-nut?” Rick pointed the tongs at him.
“Yeah, Tank. Of the three of us, you’re the one who would lose your head if it wasn’t attached.”
“Speaking of that.” Lucas turned to face Tim and Rick. “You both owe me twenty bucks.”
As the guys started arguing about who owed who money, Hank pulled Olive closer to his side, before he whispered in her ear. “All you have to do is give them something else to bitch about.”
Olive’s sea blue eyes honed in on him. “Thank you,” she whispered.
; Hank’s face turned into a smirk. “I know exactly how you can thank me.” He moved his hand from her lower back to rest on her ass before he squeezed.
“I am not letting you spank me,” she growled.
“First, you love it when I spank you,” Hank remarked matter-of-fact. “Second, that’s not how you’re going to thank me from saving you from my dick hole friends.”
Olive crossed her arms over her chest. “I do not.”
Hank pulled her body closer to his, with his hand still firmly placed on her ass. “I bet you twenty bucks if I bent you over right now, you’d be ready to take me. The thought of me spanking your perfect round ass has you soaking. Don’t lie to yourself or me.”
Hank heard her breath hitch.
Told you.
“But,” he said, drawing her attention to him. “That’s not how you’re going to thank me.”
Her annoyance was back in an instant. “Oh really. Then how?”
Hank spanked her ass lightly before he took off in a jog. When he was a few steps away from her, he looked over his shoulder and smirked. “Tomorrow. Dog has a vet appointment and you just volunteered to take her.”
Chapter Twelve
Olive stared at the cat carrier Hank left on the coffee table before he went to the station. She still couldn’t fathom how Hank had eventually gotten her to agree to take Dog to the vet. Even when she tried to protest he distracted her with the dang appendage between his legs.
What’s a girl to do when that thing comes at you?
Olive shook her thoughts away as she glanced around the room. Of course, Dog was nowhere to be found. Why would she be? That would make things easy.
“Here kitty-kitty.”
Olive heard a noise from behind the couch, so she called again. “Here kitty-kitty. Nice kitty, nice freakishly large kitty that is actually the size of a toddler, but Hank still somehow insists you’re a cat.”
Dog stepped from behind the couch and stared her down.
Holy crap on a stick.
What was she supposed to do now?
Nonchalantly, Olive took a step closer to the cat. “Hey Dog, nice seeing you around,” she spoke before pushing the cat carrier closer to the animal.
Dog blinked slowly at her.
Please don’t be sizing me up? Please, oh sweet mother of all things chocolate, please. Olive squared her shoulders before she pushed out her chest. “Do you want to go for a car ride? Animals like car rides, right?”
The creature yawned showing its teeth.
“Dog in name only.” Olive held her hands in surrender. “Gotcha.”
She walked closer to the carrier before she gently pushed it a few inches closer to Dog.
There is only one thing left to do. Olive looked toward the ceiling. Universe, ole powerful whatever you are, I am begging you please let this run smoothly. I don’t want to end up on one of those late-night shows where they tell everyone I was eaten alive by a house cat.
Olive did her best to take another calming breath. Too bad her hands were shaking. She looked at Dog once more. “Trust me, this is going to hurt me more than it’s going to hurt you.”
Dog cocked her head to the side and watched as Olive took yet another step closer to her.
One. Two. Three. Jump!
Olive leaped towards Dog. Her arms were out, ready to grab her and wrestle her to the floor if need be.
The she-devil, however, saw Olive’s plan coming from a mile away. Dog ran the opposite direction of Olive’s propelled body.
Olive landed on the floor with a loud thump. Dog stood a few feet from her, giving her a look that could only be described as “are you serious?”.
“Well, that hurt. Why in the hell did I think that was going to work?” Olive blew her hair out of her face. “What is wrong with me?”
A lot.
“Okay, new game plan.” Olive pushed herself up before stretching out her body. Hank better know he owes me a massage after this. Olive tapped her finger on her chin. “How can you convince an animal to go willingly into a carrier? Especially, one that hates your guts!”
Tuna!
That’s precisely how you do it. All cats love tuna, right? You haven’t quite confirmed the creature is a cat though. What if it’s only pretending to be a cat. Maybe Dog is some weird alien race that gets offended if you try and feed it tuna? Olive bit her bottom lip as she contemplated her next move.
She took one look at the carrier and then back at Dog.
Screw it.
Olive ran to the kitchen opening the cupboards looking for the treat to entice Dog into her temporary dungeon.
When Olive found the can, she did a happy dance. “Eureka!” She quickly opened the tuna throwing its contents into a bowl.
With a smug smile on her face and a pat on her back for her pure genius-ness, Olive walked back into the living room. “I’ll just place this in the carrier and as soon as Dog walks in I’ll shut the gate. Simple as that.”
Damn, I’m good. I should be crowned Queen Solver of all Problems!
Too bad Dog had other plans. The moment Olive walked out of the kitchen Dog jumped between her legs causing Olive to lose her footing. The tuna went flying through the air, while Olive tumbled onto the ground landing on her hands and knees.
“Son of a monkey’s biscuit!”
Once Olive finally got her bearings on what the hell just transpired she looked up to see Dog eyeing her as she scarfed down the tuna.
“Oh, for the love of all things.”
Olive flipped around so she was sitting on her butt. What the hell am I supposed to do now?
She took a quick glance at the palms of her hands and her knees. At least the universe had her back there.
No cuts. Check.
Evil she-devil creature staring me down as she eats. Double check.
Could right now get any worse? As Olive decided the world was against her, she fell backward onto the floor with a sigh. “How has my life come to this?”
Oh yeah, that’s right. Hank the freakin’ Tank.
After a few minutes of her pity party, Olive pushed herself into the seated position. That’s when she saw Dog lick her lips one last time as she finished off the tuna before she turned and leisurely walked straight into the carrier.
“What the hell?” Olive’s mouth fell open.
As her brain finally registered where Dog was, she jumped towards the carrier slamming the gate shut before locking it in place.
Olive wasn’t sure why Dog decided to take pity on her, but she wasn’t one to look a gift horse in the mouth. She checked to make sure the gate was securely closed before she placed her hand on her chest, trying to calm her erratic heartbeat.
“Step one. Done.”
Olive gathered all her hair before placing it on the top of her head in a bun.
“Now on to step two.” As Olive looked at the huge cat carrier which now housed an equally colossal cat she thought about her next options. She wasn’t a fan of taking her car anywhere. She couldn’t even remember the last time she drove it. It was old and had questionable brakes. She never wanted to chance taking it.
On the rare occasion she had to leave the apartment, she walked.
She took another look at the carrier and she knew she had no other choice but to take the death trap. Realizing her fate, she groaned. Olive then grabbed her keys and phone before searching for the address Hank had given her.
When she was ready Olive walked over to the carrier and heaved with all her might lifting the thing.
“Jesus, what the hell does Hank feed you?”
Olive heard a hiss from inside which had her quickly apologizing. “Sorry, kitty. Nice kitty. My bad kitty.”
Let’s get this over with.
Fifteen minutes later with the creature in her backseat screaming at the top of its lungs and a few turnover issues with her car Olive finally made it to the building.
Olive opened her phone once more, making sure she was in the correct place. “Richman V
eterinarian Hospital. Sounds about right,” Olive mumbled before looking into the back seat once more. “Alright, she-devil let’s get this show on the road.”
After another ten minutes, Olive finally managed to get Dog into the clinic.
“Hi ya, there,” the curvy receptionist greeted as Olive huffed herself through the door.
“Hi,” Olive managed to get out a strangled hello as she did her best to bring her breathing under control. When she made it to the counter, she placed Dog on the floor. “My roommate’s cat has an appointment.”
The receptionist smiled sweetly, pointing at the clipboard in front of her. “Put your name on the sign in sheet and someone will call you shortly.”
Olive nodded.
You mean I’m gonna have to take this thing over to the waiting area? She looked at the carrier again. I better have bodybuilder arms after this.
As Olive signed her name, she noticed the receptionist had moved her chair. Her heart melted as she saw a Corgi sleeping on a dog bed. How cute!
Much to her surprise, the Corgi opened one of its eyes, before making a small huff as if it was sizing her up.
What the hell? “Is that dog judging me?”
The receptionist turned her chair around to look behind her. “Lord Waffles? Oh, I’m sure of it.”
“Lord Waffles?” Olive’s brows shot to the ceiling.
“Yeah, I love waffles and as you can tell he thinks highly of himself, hence the ‘Lord’.” The receptionist looked her way before giving her a warm smile. “Our dogs normally don’t come into the office, but Ben’s receptionist called in sick so he asked me to fill in.” She scrunched her face looking back at the Corgi. “He’s in timeout right now, though. If he’s here he’s normally in the back playing with his sister Ripley. I’m Holly Richman. Ben’s wife.”
Olive did a quick glance around the room. Who puts a dog in timeout? Isn’t that something you only do with children? Oh, shit on a cracker. Did I walk into an alternate universe when I came in? Are all animals replaced with children now? Oh, god. They are gonna be the rulers of the world, and this one is probably their leader. Olive stared at the Corgi. I’m onto you.
Holly stood moving to a cabinet behind her. “Most of the time he’s here, he’s good enough. But today he’s being a stinker.” Once she retrieved the paper she was looking for she bent to pat the Corgi on the head.