May’s shoulders slumped and Nick wrapped his arms around her. Meaghan felt moisture fill her own eyes, but she refused to cry. This moment belonged to Nick and his mother, and she did not want to interrupt.
“Vivian made the right choice,” Nick said. His eyes found Meaghan’s over his mother’s shoulder and she understood he spoke to her, too.
“She made the right choice because she made it out of love for the woman she saw as her daughter. She made it because she realized Meaghan’s future, and ours, was worth saving.”
And in those words, Meaghan realized the true depth of Vivian’s sacrifice. She buried her face in her hands and wept.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
A SHOWER had never felt so good in Meaghan’s life. She soaked up the warm water, relishing in each drop for longer than she knew she should. As the minutes passed, she felt the remnants of her journey dissolve from her body and her mind, washed down the drain with the last remnants of dried sweat and grime. She stayed in the shower until it turned her arms and legs into beets and her fingers into prunes, and then forced herself to turn off the water and step out of the tub. Cold air brought the hairs on her arms to attention, but even that felt like a blessing bestowed on baptized skin.
Sighing with relief, she wrapped a large towel around her body, and then fingered the wool dress May had given her. The finely woven blue and white material sparkled with the simplest movement, reminding her of a crystal lake in full sunlight. She slipped the dress over her head, smiled as it flowed over her skin, and then drew a hand up to the elegant neckline to finger the white lace along the edge. The same lace edged the sleeves and the bottom of the dress.
Nick had told her making clothes took a special power, but she had understood it through her limited knowledge to be a talent, similar to clothing designers on Earth. She had not realized until now how breathtaking that power could be. No regular tailor could spin material like this. She turned to look in the mirror. The dress made the copper in her eyes dance. Like fall leaves swaying above the water, she thought, and opened the bathroom door to exit.
As soon as she saw Nick standing in the hall, she froze. Her gaze locked on the warning in his eyes, and her good mood disappeared. He glanced toward the stairs and she nodded. She could hear his mother’s voice drifting up from the living room, as well as the voices of several men she did not recognize. She waited for Nick to speak.
“They sent me to get you,” he said, his easy tone betraying no hint of the worry she saw on his face, and now felt within him. Worry, anger, confusion, and even joy washed over her from downstairs, though the emotions felt faint, as did the dozens of other emotions filtering through the walls of the house. She raised an eyebrow at Nick in question and he stepped forward so she could hear him whisper.
“My power is muted halfway,” he told her. “But it’s difficult to maintain at that level, so it can’t last long. Hopefully it will be enough for you to read them.”
Meaghan raised an eyebrow. “Who?”
“The Elders,” Nick responded and stepped back from her. Her heart dropped. “They want to speak with you. I’ve already given them my report of everything that’s happened since the Mardróch came to Earth.”
“Of course,” she said and then mouthed, “Everything?”
Nick shook his head and she knew he had not told them about the wedding. She nodded and when he inclined his head toward the stairs, she took the lead. Pausing at the bottom of the staircase, she surveyed the room.
May sat in the chair closest to the stairs, her face grim as she clutched a coffee cup in her hand. Meaghan sensed worry and a small amount of anger emanating from her.
On May’s left sat an older man sporting a short, white beard and snowy hair cropped tight above his ears. His portly body seemed molded to his seat as if he had spent half his life in it. His steel blue eyes studied Meaghan from a face etched with laugh lines and fine red veins. She felt curiosity and concern from him, but no negative emotions.
Unlike the man to his left, Meaghan realized, and caught her breath when the man’s resentment battered her power with such strength she could not ignore the implication of it. He detested her presence and he did not bother to hide it.
His copper eyes sparked with anger. He stretched long arms in front of him and then folded them together, a silent hint of defiance. A frown drew shadows along his dark, willowy beard, but he settled back into his chair, his emotions now contained, and she chased away the discomfort she had felt under his gaze and moved her attention to the last man in the room.
Although years had added a few pounds to his muscular frame and his wavy black hair had turned to salt and pepper, his round face remained clean shaven and devoid of heavy lines. She could not ignore the familiarity she felt looking at it, or the memories flooding her mind when she stared into his dark gray eyes. A smile stretched across his lips and she returned it, her joy matching his.
“Miles,” she said.
He nodded. “You remember?”
“Some. You saved my life. Then you gave me to,” she hesitated, then swallowed the word readied on her lips, replacing it with the one required of her. “Vivian.”
“I did,” Miles responded. “You’ve had a difficult journey. Sit, please. We aren’t here to judge you.”
All four pairs of eyes flicked to Nick when he came to stand beside her and she understood, even before May’s anger strengthened, that Miles had not lied. The Elders had not come to judge her. They had come to judge Nick.
Meaghan forced a smile, nodded, and found her way to the couch. Nick sat on the opposite end. “So this is a social call?” she asked, crossing her legs and lacing her hands over her knee. “A meet the Queen and see if she’ll be a pain in the ass type of thing?”
The white haired man chuckled and gripped the arms of his seat, pushing forward to study her. “Do you intend to be a pain?”
“That depends,” she said. “Who are you?”
“Sam,” he responded. “Do you?”
“If you intend to replace Nick, I promise I will be.”
Sam’s chuckle turned to guffaws of laughter and he slapped a hand on his knee. “I love it. She’s Adelina through and through.” He turned to the man who sat to his left. “You had nothing to worry about, Angus. Earth didn’t soften her at all. Seems the royal family’s trademark tenacity’s in the blood.”
Angus’ frowned. “And it also seems she has no manners. She’s using her power.”
Meaghan bristled. “Does it matter?”
“It does,” Miles responded. “As Elders, we’ve earned a certain amount of respect. Spying on our emotions doesn’t fall in line with that.”
“Then I recommend you don’t do things behind my back,” she said, her tone turning stiff with her anger at the reprimand. “Were you planning on telling me this meeting had an alternate purpose, or were you hoping to trick me into helping you hang Nick?”
Guilt flickered through Miles and she realized the Elders had intended to do exactly that. She leaned forward, pinning him with a glare. “Wrong answer,” she said. “It’s my understanding we’ll be working together if you intend for me to be Queen. We can’t do that if you think you can manipulate me.”
“Meaghan,” May warned from across the room, but Miles held up his hand, halting her. His eyes remained on Meaghan.
“That’s fair,” he said. “Nick tells us you’ve grown stronger in the days since you left Earth, and you’re ready to be Queen, but it’s difficult for us to accept. You’re little more than a stranger to us.”
“As are you to me,” Meaghan told him. “But our safety depends on us communicating, and at least attempting to trust each other.”
Miles nodded. “That’s also fair. In the interest of that trust, I’ll be frank with you. Nick’s status as your Guardian is our decision. As Queen, you have authority over us on many things, but not this. If we feel he needs to be replaced, we’ll replace him.”
“I would prefer you didn’t.
”
“I understand you’re comfortable with him, but we have your safety in mind. And Nick’s. From what he’s told us, you have a tendency of seeking out danger.”
Meaghan frowned. “That’s not his fault. I can be headstrong, but I’m getting better at listening to him.”
“It’s his job to protect you,” Sam pointed out. “Even if it’s against your will. If you didn’t listen to him, he should have stopped you anyway. Like when you saved that village boy. Nick never should have let you get close to the Mardróch. A Guardian should have more control over his charge.”
The village boy? Meaghan wondered and then realized he meant Aldin. He had told them about her rescue attempt, but not how it had ended. She deferred to Nick’s decision to keep Faillen a secret and deflected from the incident, taking a gamble she hoped would pay off. She directed her next question at May, seeking the woman’s alignment in protecting her son. “Was my mother so easy to control?”
May’s cheeks flushed in embarrassment, but she answered. “No,” she said. “She bypassed my efforts to protect her more times than not.”
“Yet you remained her Guardian, as I sense you feel Nick should stay as mine.”
May nodded. “Nick has kept you safe, like I always kept Adelina safe.”
“Until her demise,” Angus said. His words shot pain through May and she looked away. “If the Elders had replaced you,” he continued, “do you suppose Adelina would still be alive?”
“I couldn’t have stopped that,” May argued, though Meaghan felt doubt in her. “Even if I did have better control over Adelina, I was fighting the army at the perimeter, like nearly everyone else. None of us knew Garon had assigned us there to further his plan. Even Vivian didn’t get her vision until it was too late to save them.”
“We all know that,” Sam said and took May’s hand in his. “Don’t let Angus rile you. You were always good at protecting Adelina and she appreciated it.” He squeezed May’s hand before letting it go and then addressed Meaghan. “There’ll be a full debate before Nick is removed, if he is. We don’t take these decisions lightly.”
“Good,” Meaghan said.
“I’m glad you agree.” Sam narrowed his eyes. “And if it helps, I’m not entirely convinced you’re controllable. As strong as I used to be before old age caught up with me, the most I could’ve done in Nick’s position is shut you up.”
“Shut me—?” Meaghan started to ask, but despite her best efforts, she could not finish the sentence. She spoke the word, but no sound left her throat.
“You knew to ask May that question because you were reading her emotions,” Sam said. “As an old man, I value respect, so I’ll make a deal with you. If you stop using your power, I’ll stop using mine. We’ll try the trust route and keep you in the loop and you’ll stop spying on us. Deal?”
Meaghan nodded and Sam released her voice before turning to Nick and grinning. “Bet you wish you had that power.”
“Some days,” Nick admitted and turned his power on fully, acknowledging the deal Meaghan had made. “Though I think mine’s been more helpful so far.”
“Agreed,” Miles said. “And it could continue to be until she learns to control her power. We’ll take that into account when we make our decision.” He stood and clutched his hands behind his back. “Before we can do anything else, there is one other thing we need to address.”
Meaghan leaned back against the couch, working hard not to give in to her panic. She did not need her power to know what would be coming next.
“What is it?” she asked, hoping she was wrong.
“Nick told us you may want to abdicate.”
And there it was. Decision time had come.
“If you do, it’s your right,” Miles continued. “But you have to tell us now. If we introduce you to the people, if we raise their hopes, you won’t be able to back out. These people have been through enough. If their Queen returned to them, only to leave them later, their spirit would not survive. And neither, in turn, would they. Holding their resolve and their hopes together in this war has been delicate. We can’t allow you to disrupt that.”
Meaghan pressed her lips together and wished her decision would spring from her without thought. It did not. Nor did it readily come to mind. Her grief still sat like a stone in her heart. The sorrow she had felt while watching Dell die in the ravine still gripped her. The physical pain that had ripped through her during much of her journey, the emotions that had overwhelmed her while watching the battle, the worry she felt for Nick’s safety—it all swelled within her and begged her to take the escape she had been offered. If she abdicated, if she allowed someone more experienced to take over, if she walked away from the horror of this world, what harm would come of it? None she could see. And perhaps everyone could gain from her decision. This world would have the leader it needed, and she could go back to Earth. The last thought stalled her breath, but she could not decide if joy or fear had caused the reaction.
“People have seen me already,” she responded. “How do you plan on telling them I abdicated?”
Miles’ gaze turned hard. “We wouldn’t. People only saw you running through the village, heading toward the Healer. As far as they know, you’re injured. We can sneak you out tonight and tell them you died. You’d become a martyr to them.”
“Where would I go?”
“Back to Earth.”
“And Nick?”
“Would be reassigned here. Since you would no longer be royalty, you would forego any protection.” She nodded and Miles frowned. “Is that your decision then? Are you abdicating?”
Home, she thought, and swallowed the immediate reaction to say yes to his question. She wanted the comfort of it again, but would it ever be the same? She had no family left except for Nick, and he would have to stay here. He would be safer, though, and he would never have to explain the wedding. The Mardróch might follow her, but she doubted she would be worth the effort without her title. She would live a safe life, a life in the world she knew. But what would she do with her life? Go back to school and follow a career path she no longer felt certain she wanted?
“You can’t,” a voice spoke from the stairs. It came out as no more than a whisper, but all heads turned toward it. Abbott clutched the railing, his knuckles as white as his face, his body shaking, but his eyes remained steady on Meaghan’s. “I’ve seen it,” he spoke again. “I’ve seen it both ways. She showed it to me.”
“Who did?” Nick asked.
“Vivian,” Abbott told him. “I’m a Dreamer. That’s how I got away from the village. I dreamed of the attack the night it happened. I got out a few steps ahead of the army. I was faster than they were, but the poison is delivered in darts.” He turned his gaze to May for a moment and she nodded, accepting his unspoken gratitude. His attention drifted back to Meaghan. “You can’t leave us to die.”
“I don’t understand,” Meaghan said. “Vivian is dead.”
“She sent the message a month ago,” Abbott responded. “She didn’t want you to waste her sacrifice.”
Meaghan stiffened. Her eyes grew hot with tears. “You don’t know me. How can you assume I’d forget what she did? How could you,” a hand gripped her arm, stopping her from continuing. She looked from the familiar fingers to Nick’s face.
“Meaghan,” he said, and the use of her full name tightened the tension in her stomach. Although she knew he could not use her nickname in front of the Elders, it felt as wrong as everything else right now. “Dreamers are similar to Seers only they can’t receive predictions during the day like Seers can. They receive them in their dreams. And unlike Seers, they can receive direct messages from Seers or other Dreamers. Vivian reached out to him because she wanted to get a message to you. She knew he would be here now, when you needed to make this decision. She wanted you to make the right one.”
She nodded and then faced Abbott again, forcing her next question past a throat too tight and too dry for proper use. “What did you see?�
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“I saw the results of your decision,” he told her. “Both sides. If you choose to leave, you’ll be safe on Earth, but the kingdom will be sacrificed. Garon will annihilate those who don’t support him. I’ve seen the bodies of everyone in this room, lost in battle. But if you choose to stay, the kingdom will reclaim its glory and Garon will be defeated. I’ve seen,” he hesitated, his eyes flicked to Nick for a brief second, and then moved back to her. No one else in the room caught the movement. “Your King,” he continued, “sitting on the throne during his coronation and I see the joy of the people as they watch it.”
“And what of Meaghan?” Nick asked. “Is she there?”
“I wasn’t given that vision,” he answered, though Meaghan felt a chill at his response. “I have no doubt she’ll succeed if she chooses to stay.”
But she may not live, Meaghan realized and tore her eyes from Abbott to search the room. The hope she saw on May’s face reminded her of Faillen, of the hope that had emanated from him when they shook hands to seal their pact. Sam balanced on the edge of his seat, anxious as he watched her. He would be ready to die for her, as Dell had. She closed her eyes over the memory. She understood then, as she saw clearly now, the extent of Dell’s sacrifice. The happiness she had felt within him when he recognized her still haunted her. She opened her eyes and made her decision, the same one she knew Vivian had made years before. It did not matter if she lived or died. It only mattered that they succeeded in defeating Garon. Hundreds of thousands of lives would be spared in exchange for hers. Hundreds of thousands of futures would be allowed to continue. And a King worthy of their respect would lead them.
She brought her attention back to Miles and said the words she knew would change the course of her life forever.
“I am the Queen of Ærenden,” she announced. No doubt remained within her. “I have returned to take my rightful place and I will lead my people to victory.”
Aerenden The Child Returns Page 24