He looks happy I’ve said it. It’s odd. I laugh. “That’s a yes?”
He nods. “Go. Yes. That’s a good idea.”
Mom kisses my cheek, squeezes my hand, and I balance precariously as I find my way back to Adam. I plop down next to him. The captain has already untied the ropes and we’ve set off for predetermined coordinates not terribly far from the shore. I didn’t want it to be an all-day evolution. Just far enough out to be private.
“Thank you for coming. You didn’t have to,” I say, clearing my throat.
Adam sighs long and heavy. “I wanted to come. Don’t thank me, please. It’s offensive. This is about both of us. She was my daughter, too.”
I shake my head. I’m so stupid sometimes. “I’m sorry. I am. That was so rude of me to say. It’s just that I made all of these plans and all of my family is here and I didn’t want it to be awkward for you to be here.”
He grabs my hand. “It’s not awkward at all. I’m glad that you’ve finally come to this place. This is all I’ve ever wanted for you. You know that, right? I was hurt that things didn’t work out between us because of my pride, but seeing you happy, moving on with your life, makes it all worthwhile.”
“That is very sweet of you to say. Mom told me you’re engaged now.” I kind of hoped he would bring her today. It would make me feel less awkward. But I don’t think we’d be having this candid conversation if she were here, and I’m grateful for that. “I’m happy for you, too.”
Adam lights up when he tells me about his fiancée. It’s a strange mix of emotions warring as his excitement rises as he describes her. She’s a bit older than us and is divorced. Adam met her at work when she applied for a position and didn’t get it. He helped find her something at a sister company, and I guess it was a slow crawl to love after that. Or rather, him pursuing her and trying to convince her he was a good idea. The waves rock the boat a bit and I have a feeling we are nearing her final destination.
It’s confirmed when the captain starts fooling around with the anchor and the ropes along the side of the boat. I take a deep breath and look at Leo. He’s dutifully ignoring me. He’s so good at lip reading now that if he wanted to, he could know everything we’re saying by merely watching us. He’s giving us privacy.
“Listen, I know there was some shit times between us, and I don’t know if I ever properly apologized for the way I was. I wasn’t myself. I’m sorry. For everything.”
Adam squeezes my hand. “I know you weren’t. I wasn’t at my best, either. Everything happened organically. This whole thing must have been predetermined to give us both the maximum chance at our best lives. I’m sorry, too.”
The captain comes over, his rugged, dirty pants swishing as he moves. “This is it. We’ve arrived and I’ve anchored. Take as long as you need.” He disappears like a ghost.
My mom walks over, steadied by Aidan as she strides holding a familiar cardboard box under one arm. Her eyes are full of tears as she hands it to Aidan and then removes Noel’s urn. My heart beats erratically. So much pain at the mere sight of it. Leo is beside me in the next second. I accept the ceramic from her and the tears begin—a cascade of hurt running down my face. With Adam on one side and Leo on the other, we walk to the edge of the boat.
“I didn’t want to cry today,” I say, sobbing a little. “But it’s okay, because Noel was a gift that was taken too soon. A precious, precious reminder that life isn’t always perfect.”
Adam chimes in, “And that’s okay. Life isn’t supposed to be perfect. What kind of ride would that be?”
Leo squeezes my hand, and I release it to uncap the urn. There’s a plastic bag inside that has a twist tie sealing the ashes inside. Adam unties it while I hold it steady. Leo steps to stand behind me. I hand Noel over to Adam. “You do it. Put her to rest. Put it all to rest.”
Adam sprinkles the ashes and they float on top of the water before sinking slowly, a crawling descent into the cool waters to her final resting place. I watch with morbid fascination as my mind flicks through the months of pregnancy and the grief that followed. The sad memories end today, with the happiness we’ve both found. When the ashes are all out, Adam takes my hand in his.
“I love you, Kendall.”
Adam has said the words I love you five times since the day I first laid eyes on him. Today, the fifth time, is the first time I’ve actually believed he meant it.
EPILOGUE
LEO
KENDALL IS PUSHING HIM on the swing. Matching, wide smiles light both of their faces. Nate loves playing outside, and Kendall loves anything he loves. I, well, I just love both of them. More than I knew was humanly possible. Life in Bronze Bay is better than I expected. We both picked up jobs on the Bronze Bay SEAL base in the translation department. I think they wanted to hire her, but we come as a package deal, so they let me tag along. I don’t mind because I can’t get enough of her. I miss her if it’s only been minutes since I last saw her.
My chest hurts when I realize, for the first time in my life, I have something that means everything. Nate and Kendall are my whole world and it’s scary the depths I’d go to ensure not only their safety, but also their joy. Watching through the living room window, I see Kendall lift him from the swing and usher him toward the house, sunlight bouncing off their dark brown hair almost making it look like red fire for a beat or two. I sit on the sofa, next to old man Coal and pet him a few times. Internally I thank him for getting lost during the worst snowstorm the Cape has ever seen. He looks up with his green, tired eyes and lets out a meow. Kendall tells me his voice sounds old and decrepit, like an old man angry he can’t get his free coffee. I grin.
Nate toddles into the room, banging on my knees. He signs, “Daddy” and my heart melts. He pulls himself up next to me using his arms because his core is still nothing but baby fluff. He sits next to me and signs to Kendall for water. She prompts him to use the word please, and winks at me. Manners. Gotta teach that boy manners, I always say. Kendall comes back a minute later with the horrible, misshapen cup that leaks everywhere, and hands it to Nate. She picks up Coal and sets him in her lap as she sits next to me. He meows at her, but she quiets him by kissing his nose.
“You guys were having a blast out there,” I remark. Looking first to Nate because he doesn’t understand my hearing loss yet and will sign before I look at him. When I see he’s too busy drinking, I look at Kendall.
“Yeah, hopefully he goes down for a long nap after this.” She bites her lip.
I quirk a brow. “Again?”
She tilts her head back in a laugh. “Can’t keep up with me, old man?”
I sign. “Oh, I can. But I don’t want to make you sore.”
“I want you to,” she signs back.
“Okay, this is inappropriate conversation for young Nate man. You ready for a nap, big guy?”
“Yes, Daddy,” Nate signs and says. His lips are a little more difficult to read. Kendall says he sounds like a drunk man with a fairy voice, and when he actually reaches human level I’ll be able to understand him better. I wish I could hear him. Wishing doesn’t get you anywhere in this world, though. I appreciate everything I do have.
Nate goes down in his little bed after two books, another glass of water, and seven stuffed animals tucked in tight. Kendall is waiting for me in our bedroom when I click his door closed and cross the dark hallway.
Her perfume permeates the wood in here. Even hours after she gets ready for the day. It always smells like her in here, and for that reason alone, I always linger in here longer than I should. Even after she’s gone. Sitting at the edge of the bed thanking God I get to share this space with her for another day. That after the zig-zagging of our insane friendship bound by grief and old memories, I get to have this with her. Our family. The intense love that will never leave us.
She’s naked, kneeling in the center of our king-sized bed. “You were going to make me sore, Mr. Callaway?”
Narrowing my eyes, I lick my lips before I take of
f my shirt. I tackle her on the bed, letting my tongue lick a trail up her body before taking her lips with my own. Her breaths are harried, and as the kiss deepens I can almost hear her moans inside the lust we have for each other. Will always have for each other.
This is when I hear her the loudest. When we don’t have to say anything at all.
We are together. The rest is history.
A NOTE FROM THE AUTHOR
I found a kitten in the gutter when I was in college and named him Theodore. One Christmas he jumped off a second-story balcony porch and became a lost cat. It was awful. We posted flyers and my husband would go out to look for him every day (and night, while wearing a head lamp). One day he texted me while I was at work and told me he’d found Theodore in a neighborhood a few miles away. He’d stuffed the cat in his gym duffle bag and driven him home. On my way home, he texted me and told me our dog was acting weird around the cat. When I got there, I’d quickly realized it was NOT Theodore. Our dog knew what my husband did not. This bitch ass cat, with a weird white paw, didn’t belong in our house. It was devastating.
My husband zipped him back up in the duffle bag and returned him to where he found him. I guess the cat ran directly into an open garage when he released him. Basically, out of desperation, we ended up stealing a cat for six hours. I wanted to give Coal a better ending than Theodore had. This one is for you, Theedy. We miss you. We stole for you.
Thank you to everyone who helped me bring this story to life. My mother and father-in-law who answered a bunch of questions about ear trauma, hearing loss, and deafness. My sister for obsessing over lyrics I HAD TO WRITE, and wedding scenes with me. Tierney for speed reading with such precision skill I’m never quite sure if you’re actually human. It’s also a little offensive that something that takes me months and months to write can be consumed that quickly. I love you for it, though. Julie, for keeping my timelines straight and offering sage wisdom I will never learn how to absorb. Thank you for being the analytical one. Having you on my team is essential!
As always, thanks to my husband for being my inspiration. He always gives me the best information and suggestions no matter what I’m writing. C, my association with you will always be…forever.
OTHER TITLES BY INTERNATIONAL BESTSELLING AUTHOR, RACHEL ROBINSON
CONTEMPORARY ROMANCE
CRAZY GOOD SERIES
CRAZY GOOD (Free)
SET IN STONE
TIME AND SPACE
THE REAL SEAL SERIES
BLACK AND WHITE FLOWERS
HERO HAIR
LIFE PLUS ONE
BRONZE BAY SEAL SERIES
KEEPING IT
TOSSING IT
STEALING IT
HARBOUR POINT SEAL SERIES
LUST IN TRANSLATION
ROMANTIC COMEDY
FROG HOG NOVELLAS
Frog Hog – Valen and Hutch
EROTIC ROMANCE
THE DOM GAMES
Visit Rachel Robinson online
www.racheljrobinson.com
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Lust in Translation (Harbour Point SEAL Series Book 1) Page 21