by Quinn Loftis
“Because it isn’t that simple,” she explained. “Cathal would have to approve the courting as well, and that would never happen.”
“What?” I asked. “What do you mean?”
“Because Cathal’s third queen was the woman this man courted when he was younger. Cathal took her, and then after a year of marriage she died suddenly.”
“What is your beau’s name?” Mother asked.
Lizzy shook her head. “I am sorry, Mother, but I promised I wouldn’t say. Cathal isn’t aware that he is here.”
“Why did he come?” Dayna asked.
“I can’t say that, either.”
The three of us stared at her, shocked that she was willing to keep secrets from us, her family.
“Are you in danger? Is someone threatening you? Is he threatening you?” Our mother spoke up.
“No, it’s not like that at all. We have been careful. No one knows him, and we go to the small tavern on the edge of the village to meet. I’m never alone with him,” she quickly added.
I didn’t like what she was telling us, but Lizzy was eighteen. She was of marrying age and had the right to choose who she wanted to marry, provided his class was suitable.
“So, is he planning on staying here after Cathal leaves?” Dayna asked.
Lizzy’s hands were trembling in her lap, something I’d never seen in our calm middle sister. “I do not think he will be going back,” she answered.
“If he stays, he must speak to your father.”
Lizzy nodded. “I’m sure Father will be speaking with him soon.”
I tilted my head as I looked at her. She seemed sad. Why would she be sad if the man she had been sneaking around with was staying in our kingdom?
“Wouldn’t that make you happy?” I asked. “For him to stay?”
Lizzy finally looked up and met my gaze. There were unshed tears in her eyes, but they were pleading me not to ask why they were there. “I’m asking you to trust me, as your sister.” She turned to Dayna. “And yours.” Then she turned to our mother. “And as your daughter. Trust me that he is no danger to me or my father.”
The stunned silence in the room wasn’t surprising. Lizzy didn’t do emotions. She was calm and collected, and yet every time I’d seen her since she had started seeing the mystery man, she’d been anything but calm. How was I supposed to trust her when she seemed so broken over a man we did not know?
“Fine,” Mother said. “I will leave it alone for now. But after everything is settled, then he must speak with your father about courting you.”
I noticed she didn’t say after the wedding. My mother was making it clear that she had no plans for there to be a wedding and by the seas I wanted to throw myself at her feet and thank her for supporting me. I had no doubt that my parents loved me, but they were leaders of an entire country. The people depended on them for protection and provision. By making this choice, they were essentially choosing me over their duties as king and queen. I wished I could tell them not to; I wished I was that selfless. But now that I’d met Torben, everything had changed. I couldn’t see my life without him, and I couldn’t see my life with Cathal in it.
We spent the rest of the afternoon simply talking. It was so strange to live with people who you loved and yet see so little of them. We were in this palace every day, and yet there were days that went by that I didn’t even cross Lizzy’s path if she did not come to breakfast.
We reminisced about our childhood and how so much had changed. But most of all, we avoided completely the topic of marriage, Cathal, and anything that might remotely pertain to him. No matter how much I enjoyed my time with my family, Torben was ever-present in the back of my mind. I knew he was just outside the door, and I hated that he had to act like my guard instead of my equal.
The door opened then, and in stepped the object of my thoughts. To me, he was a handsome, longhaired, lightly bearded Viking warrior, but to my family they were seeing him as an English guard with short hair and clean-shaven face. He was huge in either regard, and he was also mine.
“Ow,” I growled as I rubbed the shin Dayna had just kicked.
She leaned over close. “You were looking at him like he was the last dessert on the table. Pull yourself together, woman.”
I glanced back up to see Torben watching us with a smirk on his face. I wondered if he’d been able to feel my attraction for him, as he had felt my pain earlier. I felt my face flush when I realized just how embarrassing such a thing would be.
“Forgive the interruption, Your Highness,” Torben said as he bowed to my mother. “Your nephew is here and wishes to speak with Allete.”
“Of course,” my mother said as she motioned with her hand. “Let him in.”
Thomas walked in and gave Torben a pointed look. Whether it was a look of good or ill, however, I couldn’t decipher. Torben turned to close the door and winked at me just as it shut him out of the room. I received another kick from Dayna for the grin I couldn’t suppress.
“Dayna, quit kicking your sister, and Allete, quit doing whatever it is you’re doing to illicit such a response,” Mother said, her voice sounding so much like it had when we were children doing much the same thing.
I started to say something, but Thomas cut me off.
“What exactly happened this morning at breakfast?” His clenched jaw made it perfectly clear that he knew what happened, but he wanted me to confirm it.
“Cathal was simply asserting his dominance,” I responded.
“Allete, he was hurting you. I could see it in your face. Why would you—”
“What?” I suddenly said as I stood up. “Why would I what, Thomas? Why would I let the king of Tara, a man who I am subject to and betrothed to, speak to me in such a way, handle me in such a way?” I was nearly yelling as the anger and humiliation built inside of me. I knew that Thomas simply cared about me, and this was his way of expressing his sorry. I knew that he did not mean his question to be insulting, and yet I was insulted. “I may be a princess. I may be next in line to be queen in my own country, but that holds no value to Cathal. The only value I have for that man is what I can do for him. The alliance I represent to Britain and the sons I can bear him. To openly disrespect him in front of others, especially in front of the court, would be throwing Father at his mercy.” My breathing had increased, and my heart was racing in my chest as I pointed my finger at my now-helpless looking cousin. “I am simply a woman, Thomas. Royal, yes. But still a woman. I have pushed the boundaries that hold my sex back as far as I can push them without causing Father disrespect. I will continue to do what I can, but I could not speak out against Cathal this morning. He would have done more than bruise my side.”
When I felt the steam seep out of me, my shoulders sagged forward. I felt bereft and tired, as though I’d been working in the fields all day instead of sitting on a cushioned chair, calmly conversing with my family.
“Forgive me, cousin,” Thomas said after several minutes. He walked over to me and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me tightly against him. “I just cannot stand to see you hurting, physically or otherwise.”
“I know,” I said as I patted his back. “I am the one who should apologize. I shouldn’t have yelled. I think I am simply tired and have too much on my mind.”
Thomas released me and stepped back. He wiped the tear from my cheek that I hadn’t realized had fallen and smiled at me. “And just so you know, there is nothing such as ‘simply a woman.’ The statement itself is an oxymoron. There is nothing simple about any woman and certainly not you. Remarkable? Yes. Unique? Most definitely. Passionate, good, honest and beyond lovely? Without a doubt. But never simple.”
He pressed a kiss to my forehead and bowed to the rest of the room. “I’ll take my leave, good ladies. And plan to see you all tomorrow evening at the ball. I’m sure it is going to prove to be an interesting evening.”
I snorted out a laugh. Interesting indeed.
To my surprise, Mother insisted we eat dinne
r in her chambers instead of dining with the court. It was the first time in a very long time that we’d eaten as a family. Even Father joined us. My heart was overflowing with love by the time the evening was ending. As we each said our goodnights, Father came over to me and hugged me tightly to him.
“I want you to sleep tonight, Allete. Do not stay up worrying about everyone else. Do no worry for our kingdom and do not worry for yourself.” He pulled back to look at me. “Tomorrow evening will be the last time you have to see or deal with Cathal. You have my word.”
I kissed his cheek. “Thank you, Father. I will do my best not to worry.”
He chuckled. “Liar. You’re too much like your mother. You care too deeply, even about things you have no control over.” He paused and brushed my hair from my face. “But then I would rather you care too much than too little.”
“Simply a woman. Could she really believe such nonsense? We are male and we are female and we are both necessary to the continuation of humanity. How could anyone think that one sex was greater than the other? Men are needed to create life, and women are needed to carry, nurture, and bring forth life. One could not exist without the other. When two things need each other to survive, in my mind, there is nothing more equal. Men need women and women need men. Why was that such a difficult concept for some to grasp?”
* * *
~Torben
Allete was quiet as we walked back to her chambers. I had heard her laughter throughout the day as I stood guard at the door to her father and mother’s chambers. There were a few times that I caught the king and queen’s guards attempting to hide their own smiles when they heard her laughter as well. It took all of my control not to pull my sword on them and claim her like some barbaric warlord and demand that they cover their ears, as if I was the only one who had a right to enjoy the sound of her joy. So many times, I had been tempted to open the door just so I could see her. I wanted to see the light that shone in her eyes. I could imagine how the light intensified when she found something humorous. I wanted to listen to her voice as she spoke. I wanted to be at her side, where I belonged.
“Did you have an enjoyable time with your family?” I asked when we reached her door. My voice seemed to startle her from her thoughts as she blinked several times and then looked up at me.
“Forgive me, Torben, my mind is a bit of a mess.”
I leaned around her and grasped the handle of her door. As I pushed it open, she backed up to keep me from bumping into her. I glanced over my shoulder at Brant. “Give me fifteen minutes. If I’m not out by then, come in and get me.”
“Do I look like I want to die?” he balked. “I’m not ready to challenge you for the position of hersir just yet.”
I thought about what I’d just asked him to do and then nodded. “You’re right. I’d kill you. Fine, send Dayna in if I’m not out.”
He grinned. “That I can do. Any excuse to talk to her.”
When the door was finally closed and the rest of the world was nowhere in sight, I shed the pretense that she was simply my charge. With that door closed, we were now back on equal ground. She was my mate, my bride, and I was her warrior. I took her in my arms and chuckled at the breathless squeak that rushed out of her. It didn’t last long because my lips covered hers before anything else could come out.
I needed to hold her. I needed to taste her. I just needed her. Being so close to her and unable to touch her had been torture. Watching Cathal touch her, as if he had a right to her, had nearly driven me to kill. And then knowing he’d hurt her and there was nothing I could do about it made me want to destroy him, raise him from the dead, and destroy him all over again. There would be no honorable death for Cathal. There would be no quick passing from this world into the next. When he died—and he would by my sword—it would be slow and agonizing.
“Are you all right?” Allete asked breathlessly as she pulled back. She cupped my face in her small hands and tilted it until she could look directly in my eyes. “Where did you go? You were with me, kissing me and wanting me, and then you were gone.”
I closed my eyes and leaned my forehead against hers. This new ability between us was going to take some getting used to. “I’m sorry,” I said as I sighed and rubbed my hand down her back. “I was just thinking about what happened at breakfast.”
She pressed her finger to my lips to stop me. “He is not welcome in this space,” Allete whispered. “Not in thoughts or words. In here, it is just you and me.”
When she stepped back from me and smiled, it felt as though everything that was wrong in my spirit was suddenly right again.
“Just you and me,” I repeated.
She nodded. “And I think you’re down to about ten minutes before Dayna comes bursting into our bubble.”
I undid the belt that held my sword to my side. Her eyes widened, and I couldn’t help but laugh. “Wishing your sister would show up early?” I asked, my voice dropping an octave as I saw the rise and fall of her chest quicken.
“Of course not,” she said as she glanced down to straighten her already straight dress.
“First rule of battle, princess, don’t take your eyes off your opponent,” I said as I lunged for her and tackled her onto the bed. Her laughter filled the room and the rightness of it settled into my soul. For the next ten minutes, my world consisted of Allete and nothing else.
“I didn’t realize we were in a battle, Viking,” she said and halfheartedly attempted to get away.
“I have a feeling you and I are going to have lots of battles, love. But I’m okay with that.”
She frowned. “Why would you be okay with us fighting?”
My grin widened. “Because every battle we have will end with an equally passionate reconciliation.”
“And what if we are at an impasse?”
“Then it will be a passionate impasse.”
She laughed again and tapped me on the end of my nose. “You, sir, are incorrigible.”
I shrugged. “Maybe.” I kissed her cheeks, her nose, her chin, and finally her lips. Her skin was soft under my fingertips as I ran them down her neck and the shiver that rushed through her body told me she was equally affected by me as I was by her.
“Who would have thought that a mighty Viking warrior could be so gentle?” Allete said softly as she sighed and pressed her cheek to my palm.
“For you, I can be anything.”
By the time I stepped back into the castle corridor and shut Allete’s door behind me, much longer than fifteen minutes had passed.
“What happened to sending in Dayna?” I asked Brant.
He shrugged. “You needed time with her.”
“And what if someone had come along and asked where I was, namely, Cathal?”
Brant shrugged again. “I had a plan.”
I narrowed my eyes on him. “What exactly did that plan involve?”
“Let’s just say a wild boar, some rope, and expertly placed cuts were all included.”
I rubbed a hand down my face and leaned back against the door. “Leave it to you to have a wild boar as your accomplice.”
“I have a rule. Always be able to murder your murder accomplice.”
“Remind me to never assist you with murder.”
He chuckled. “I’ve already picked out my partner if the boar doesn’t come through, and she’ll be even tastier.”
I frowned at him. “That is not even funny. That’s her sister.” I pointed behind me. “And eating … and … just—”
“Oh, come one, it is a little funny.”
His stupid chuckling caused me to chuckle right alongside him. “Okay, fine, if I don’t think of her as the sister to the woman I love, then yes, it’s a little funny.”
“If you have the same policy, we both know the boar wouldn’t be your first choice, either.”
That earned him a fist to the gut, which he took in good humor.
Brant held up his hands in retreat. “All right, all right. I won’t go talking about you and
your female’s dining habits.”
“If you weren’t the best warrior I knew, I’d tell Dayna I saw you flirting with a linen maid.” I paused for effect. “While she was making a bed.”
Brant’s faced wiped clean of the smile. “Don’t even jest like that. You know what she said she’d do if she heard I was flirting.”
I nodded. “Aye, I did. Now I finally have some leverage to keep you in line.”
He grumbled, but his grin was fast to return.
“What are you smiling about?” I asked him.
“Just looking forward to when this is over, and we’re back home with our women.”
Home. That was the one word that always puts a smile on any warrior’s face. But home had a whole different meaning to me now. Home was simply wherever Allete was.
I didn’t know why I awoke. One minute I was sleeping, dreaming about a small but inviting home with a warm fire and the smell of fresh bread wafting through the air. The next minute my eyes were blinking open. It took several seconds for them to adjust to the darkness in the room. I sat up and pushed my messy braid over my shoulder.
Just as I had the night Myra had come to visit, I felt the otherness in the room, the power that only came from one who had magic.
“Show yourself, Myra,” I said into the dark.
A small woman stepped out of the darkness. She was standing across the room next to my window. “Who are you, and how did you get into my chamber?” I asked.
“I scaled the wall and climbed in the window,” she answered without hesitation.
I was so shocked that I didn’t speak right away and then my senses returned. “Really?”
She turned and looked at me, her silver eyes dancing with mirth. The small smile on her lips made her resemble a child who’d just gotten away with mischief. “No. That would be ridiculous. I walked in through the door like any other old woman would. Could you imagine me, with my frail bones and stiff joints, climbing up the side of a wall?”