by M J Spence
“Well that stops now.” Owen said. “You will not touch yourself unless I give my permission for you to do so.”
“But Sir….” He was about to explain how masturbating helped him sleep at night and sometimes helped him get through the day.
“Do you remember the safe word that they gave you at the club Christopher?”
“Yes Sir.”
“Do you wish to use it?”
“No Sir.”
“Then we can move on. On average how many sexual encounters do you think you’ve had over the course of your life.” Owen wasn’t expecting an exact number but he thought that the boy would have some idea. Christopher took a breath. This was getting harder and harder. “A lot Sir. Too many to count.”
And Owen had worried about breaking him. “All consensual?”
The boy lowered his head “Most Sir, but can I have permission not to talk about the others?” Owen noticed that the boy had said others and not other. He had been forced more than once.
“You don’t have to talk about it now since this is temporary and will likely only be that but if it goes farther you will of course talk to me about it.”
“Yes Sir.”
“Something to think about isn’t it?” Owen said realizing that if the time came this would be something that would be hard for the boy to talk about.
“Yes Sir it is.”
“Now, are you just a free spirit or is there a reason that you’ve had so many sexual experiences.” The boys head lowered again but Owen put his fingers to his chin and raised his head. “I…..worked the streets when I was younger Sir. My parents were addicted and I had to support us and sometimes support their habit until I got taken away. I lived in a group home until me and another boy ran away when we were about 15. We lived on the streets after that and needed money.”
“How long were you in the group home?”
“Three years”.
Owen did the math quickly in his head.
“And when did you start supporting your parents drug habit?” He dreaded hearing the answer. “Eleven” The boy said. Jesus. Owen thought. Some parents didn’t deserve kids. He looked down at Christopher and an overwhelming need to take him in his arms and hold him passed over him but the boy seemed to have survived.
“So you and this other boy sold yourselves for money while you lived on the streets and when you supported your parents habit?” Owen reiterated.
“My parents chose to sell me to support their habit Sir. When we lived on the streets it was our own choice to sell ourselves. Mine and my friends. It was all we knew. I got beat up a lot by other kids cause I made more money than them cause I was “pretty” but other than that it was ok Sir. The other kid protected me as much as he could. He was and still is my best friend but he had to go away for a while and I was by myself. That was hard but we eventually got back together.”
He looked at Owens face. “Please don’t feel bad Sir or feel like I need to be taken in because of that. It turned out ok, I have a job now and the other boy is ok. I just feel like this is what I’m supposed to be. To take care of someone’s needs and to be told what to do and when to do it Sir. I’ve spent my life giving others what they want. That has to count for something. And you should know that I’ve also developed a liking for pain Sir if that interests you. And in case you’re worried I get tested regularly. I was just tested a couple weeks ago and I have the proof.”
This was more than Owen had bargained for. The boy had to be broken and he had no idea how to fix him.
“Please don’t send me away Sir. I want this even if it’s only for a week. You said that you wanted the truth and I don’t want to lie to you.” Tears were finding their way down his cheeks. “Please.”, and in a whisper “please”.
Owens voice turned gentle. “I’m not sending you away Christopher. As I said, we have a week to get to know each other.”
The boy leapt up from the floor almost knocking Owen from his chair with the force of the hug he gave him. Owen pulled him into his lap and hugged him back allowing the boy to bury his head in the crook of his shoulder.
“We’ll talk more later. Right now it looks like I’m not going to get any breakfast cooked for me so let’s go out and get something. Does that sound like a good idea to you?” Chris nodded his head against Owens now wet shoulder.
Six
They went to a nearby diner for breakfast. Owen told Christopher to order whatever he wanted while he ordered a simple bacon and egg breakfast. For such a skinny kid the boy ate a lot of food and he wolfed it down like it was his last meal. Owen enjoyed watching him eat. “I’m sorry Sir am I doing something wrong?” the boy said noticing Owens eyes on him. “Not at all Christopher. Enjoy your meal except maybe don’t eat so fast. You’re going to choke” he chuckled. “Sorry Sir.”
Owen was thinking again while watching the boy. He had to be broken. Coming from such a background there was no way he couldn’t be and Owen was hesitant to take on the responsibility of mending him especially in a bdsm atmosphere. He was thinking that the boy might be too much to deal with. He needed and wanted a submissive that wanted the lifestyle not someone who needed to be fixed. Perhaps it would help seeing the boy outside of the submissive role. Maybe in a different atmosphere. Right now the boy was presenting himself as someone who needed repairing and the lifestyle was not that, shouldn’t be that. It was a power exchange. One giving and one accepting and the boy had no power to offer to Owen. He could not give something which he did not have. Owen didn’t know if he had it in him to fix the boy even if he wanted to assume challenge.
And then there was the age difference. Owen was 32 and the boy was only 20. Twelve years was a big difference. And adding to that was also Tristan. He still wasn’t really sure if he was ready to replace him yet. Too many reasons not to take the boy. Maybe a talk with Ben would help. Another viewpoint might be what was needed. Or even Liam. Liam had Christophers best friend and he was the same age as Chris. Liam was 30 almost the same age difference as between he and Christopher. Yes. Liam was the better choice he would call him later today and arrange a meeting with both Liam and Ben.
And here he is thinking about what to do with the boy again. This was only supposed to be a week of playtime for charity and he was thinking long term. What was it about this boy? From the moment the boy clamored to the front of the cage and looked at him with those light brown eyes it had done something to him. Like a puppy at a pet store that you couldn’t resist so you ended up going home with arms full of puppy food, toys, a dog bed and a new puppy that was going to chew up your favorite slippers and pee all over your house until you finally got him trained. Just cause you succumbed to a pair of puppy eyes. He knew better. He had told the boy that he would be his for christ sake. What was that? Well, the boy better not chew his slippers or pee on anything.
He looked across the table at the boy who was smiling and saying something that Owen had missed he was so deep in thought. A lock of the boys hair had fallen into his eyes and he had to stop himself from reaching across and tucking it behind the boys ear. “I’m sorry what Christopher?”
“I said thank you Sir. For the breakfast, it was good. Not like what I have to work with in my restaurant.”
“You’re welcome Christopher. If you’re finished it’s time we got back.”
He left a tip on the table for the waitress and they walked the two blocks back to the apartment the boy talking nonstop all the way. Owen missed this. Aside from the give and take of the lifestyle he missed having someone to talk to on a daily basis. He spent time with Ben and sometimes with Liam but they had their own lives and their own subs to tend to. Especially Ben. Aaron was more a boyfriend to Ben than a submissive and they spent most of their time together. Owen needed that. He had missed it.
***
When they returned to the penthouse Owen went into his office closed the door and put in a call to both Liam and Ben. He and Ben were closer than he and Liam but still he felt that Liams viewpoint
might be more helpful. He had only been with this boy overnight and already he was seeking advice about him. He was acting like a lovesick teenager after less than 24 hours with the boy. He decided to give it a couple more days so he arranged to talk to them on Tuesday after work.
When he came out of his office the boy had already undressed and was kneeling on the carpet in the living room waiting to see what Owen wanted him to do next.
“I have some work to do Christopher. Make yourself at home. Turn on the TV if you want. I’ll be in my office. There are books on the bookshelf if you like to read. Nothing in my home is off limits except my office. Is there anything that you need?”
“No Sir. Is there anything that you need?”
He turned gray eyes on the boy. What he needed was for this boy to be waiting when he came home from his day at work or when he woke up in the morning. Waiting for whatever he might need or want.
“No Christopher, I don’t need anything and I won’t be long.”
Christopher grabbed the remote, settled himself on the floor in front of the TV and found an old “I Love Lucy” to watch. He enjoyed old TV shows. He was laughing at Lucys antics when the intercom buzzed. Not knowing if he should answer it or wait for Owen he walked over to the screen by the door and saw that it was two men he recognized from last night at Lair. He remembered that one was a sub because he had been kneeling beside the other and collared and leashed.
Owen called from the other room. “Who is it Christopher” before he remembered that Chris wouldn’t know any of his friends and came out to see for himself. Seeing that it was Ben and Aaron he pushed the button that allowed the elevator to ascend all the way up to the penthouse.
Christopher began scrambling to find something to cover his nakedness.
“Stop it boy. What did I tell you?”
“That I was to stay naked Sir unless there was company. This is company Sir.”
“This is company but they’re in the lifestyle. I guess I didn’t explain the difference. We will discuss it later but for now you will remain as you are.”
“Yes Sir.” He was blushing again.
The elevator opened and Ben and Aaron stepped out. Owen was holding the door open for them and pulled Ben into a hug. “I just talked to you on the phone Ben. What brings you here?” Owen asked.
“You sounded worried when I talked to you and Aaron and I were in the neighborhood so I decided to stop by and see what’s bothering you now instead of waiting.”
Owen turned to Christopher. “Make a pot of coffee Christopher and have Aaron bring two mugs into my office. And get Aaron whatever he wants.”
They went into the Owens office closing the door behind them.
“Don’t be embarrassed Chris. You’ll get used to it. I had to do the same thing when I was first with my master.” Aaron said noticing Chris’s nervousness. “Try not to let it bother you. I’ve seen my share of bare ass subs. You’re not the first. Wait till your first public play session if he decides to keep you.”
When the coffee finished Chris put a dash of vanilla into one of the mugs stirred it and took out cream and sugar for Aaron to fix Bens. Aaron added a teaspoon of sugar to the other mug stirred and picked them both up and headed for Owens office. He tapped lightly on the door, opened it and entered setting both mugs on a low table in front of Ben and Owen who were relaxing on the couch. “Thank you Aaron” Owen said. “You’re welcome Sir.” Aaron said before turning and leaving.
“Now enough small talk. Let’s get down to business Owen. What is it that’s so much of a problem that you need to meet with me and Liam.”
“Well I had planned to wait until Tuesday to give it a couple more days but here’s the thing. I really like this boy. I know it’s only been a day and I don’t believe in love at first sight,” he said with a laugh “but there’s something about him.”
“So you’ll have him for a week. That’s enough time to sort your feelings out.”
“Yeah. I know that but before I get in too deep I need to straighten some things out in my head. First he’s only 20, which is the reason for wanting Liam in on this. And also I’m not sure if he’s ok and can take being sub.”
“What do you mean by ‘ok’?”
Owen gave him a condensed version of Christophers life.
”Holy shit, Owen. How can he be ok. I feel for the boy but that’s a big responsibility to accept if you decide to keep him. There’s the chance that he’s moved on from his past and can deal with it but it’s a lot to get over.”
“I’ve thought about that and he tells me he’s over it but what if he isn’t? Then it would be up to me to fix him. He and I need to be able to take care of each other and if he can’t handle his past then this would just be a continuation of it. I would be using him just like everyone else in his life has. And there’s still the question of Tristan.”
“I know you’re not over Tristan but you have to make an effort. This is the first boy that you’ve shown any interest in since you let Tristan go. You need to think of this as a sign that it’s time. You’ve been alone for over a year.
By the way didn’t you say that Christopher ran away with another boy and was working the streets.”
“Yeah.”
“And isn’t one of Liam’s boys Christophers’ best friend.”
“I see where you’re going. If that’s true and Alex is the boy that Chris was with he seems to be doing fine. I haven’t heard any complaints from Liam about him. He’s the same age as Christopher though which is why I want to talk to him and if he’s the one that was with Chris that makes it even more important to have Liam in on this conversation.”
“I don’t know Ben. Maybe this is all too premature. Maybe by the end of the week I won’t even be able to stand the sight of the kid or maybe he will have used his safe word and gone back to his life. Anything can happen in seven days.”
“You’re right. My opinion is to give it a chance but let’s hear Liams take on it. In the meantime don’t sweat it Owen. You’re thinking too hard.” He got up from the couch. “I gotta go. I was taking Aaron over to Andres for an early dinner. Any chance of the two of you joining us?”
“Nah. The boy only owns jeans and sneakers and my stuff doesn’t fit him so we need to keep it casual until I can take him shopping.”
”Ok then. I’ll see you at the office on Monday. And take it easy on the boy. He’s gonna have a coronary if you keep having him bare ass in front of people.”
“He has to learn that his body is not his own anymore. For this week it belongs to me.” He escorted Ben and Aaron to the elevator and waited for the doors to close behind them.
***
Owen made his way to the couch and said. “Find yourself something comfortable to put on Christopher and come back. We need to talk.”
What now? Christopher was thinking. Why am I getting dressed? Is he getting ready to send me home? Did his friend convince him I wasn’t worth it? He began to shake at the thought but found a pair of sweats and a tee that he had brought with him. He got to his hands and knees and crawled back to where Owen was seated on the couch and knelt in front of him.
“Did I do something wrong Sir?” He asked once more. ‘Do I have to go home now cause I swear I can do better if you just give me a chance.” He was very close to tears again. Having this time to actually be sub was important to him.
“No Christopher you’ve done nothing wrong. Sit here beside me. I want to talk man to man with you.”
”I would prefer to sit on the floor Sir. If that’s alright.” Relief flooded through him.
“If you prefer but I don’t want to talk to you as a submissive. Will you be able to do that?”
“Yes Sir. I mean yes of course I can.”
How long have you felt you were meant to be submissive?”
“Since about fifteen. I used to read a lot whenever I could find books. I didn’t go to school for very long and it was my way of trying to educate myself when I wasn’t umm… working. I
used to find books in garbage dumps and sometimes people would give them to me knowing that I liked to read. The books were my most prized possessions. Anyway, I happened to find some books on the bdsm lifestyle and they fascinated me. I decided that that was how I wanted to live my life. I wanted to be someones possession. I wanted to be taken care of and in return I wanted to give someone anything that they wanted of me. Sexually and otherwise. The lifestyle excited me. The giving up of power. I was used to giving it up anyway so it would be no different. I also was introduced to pain by one of my clients. I haven’t seen him in a long time but he introduced me to the pleasure of pain a little at a time. He was a good man and figured out that it was what I liked. It got to a point that I could almost climax from pain I loved it so much. Of course I know the difference between pain as punishment and pain for pleasure. Pain for punishment is more like humiliation to my mind and to my body if that makes sense. When you put me over your knee and spanked my ass it was not pleasure. My body reacted and I got hard but my mind took it as punishment and since my body reacted it added more humiliation to it. So what I’m trying to say is that I hate being disciplined even though I like pain. Am I making sense to you Sir?”
His words were tumbling over each other with his effort to say everything that he wanted to get out.
”Yes, Christopher it makes sense but you got off subject. You’ve wanted to be sub since you were fifteen?”
“No. I don’t think I decided that I wanted to be sub. I think it was when I found out that I am sub. I don’t think that it’s a choice Sir. It’s like being gay, which I am also, you either are or you aren’t. I don’t think you get to choose what you are. I think that some people play at being sub but very few actually are submissive. I’m submissive even though I don’t have a Dom. Having a Dom would be the ideal situation for me but it doesn’t keep me from being submissive. It’s what I am, with or without a Dom. Just as not having a submissive doesn’t keep you from being a Dom. It’s what you are.