Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad, transitioning into a vampire—I technically could, thanks to my great-great-whatever being half-vampire, not that I’d seriously entertained the idea—but damn, at least then my muscles wouldn’t be screaming at me and sliding razorblades across my nerves. Maybe eating people wouldn’t be so bad compared to this.
I laughed at my own absurdity, thinking my mind may have raced off right alongside my energy.
“What’s funny?” Lyric asked from my right as she walked me toward the dining hall. Avi and Olivia had disappeared a half hour ago, likely using the time to discuss royal things I shouldn’t be privy to.
“I think I’ve been going nonstop for so long that my mind is starting to slip.”
Lyric chuckled, looping her arm through mine. “If you’re crazy, then I’m crazy.”
“None of that,” I said, rounding the corner with her. “The last thing the world needs is a crazy vampire queen racing through the night, screaming at people to read more.”
Lyric gaped up at me, then laughed harder. “You don’t know me.”
“Do so—”
“I don’t give a fuck what your supercomputer data says!” Lachlan’s sharp words cut my playful ones off. Lyric and I froze just outside the dining hall, eyes wide as we stared at Lachlan and Ransom. “You’re missing something. And for an ancient strategist, not to mention the supposedly best hacker on the planet, you can do better!”
Lyric gasped at my side, and I went absolutely still.
Lachlan had been grumbly with me since the first time we met, but I’d never seen him so…cold before. Not even a few days ago when I’d walked in on him and Alek on the tail end of what looked like a very serious discussion. Lachlan had laughed it off, told me not to worry, but looking at him now…
“Brother,” Ransom said, his voice a practiced sort of calm that raised chills on my arms. The playful flirt of a vampire was nowhere in sight. This Ransom was full Onyx Assassin. “Because I love you, I’m giving you five whole seconds to get out of my face.”
“Five?” Lachlan growled, then barked a dark laugh. “Or what, Ransom?”
“I want to get Daphne back for Valor,” he said instead of answering. “I do. We all do, and we’re all doing every fucking thing we can. But, in case you’ve forgotten, we’re in an all-out war here. Our lines are stretched as thin as they get. The aristocrats are up our asses, and we only have so many on the inside we can now trust. Not everything revolves around your mate’s needs!”
“For me, it does!” Lachlan snapped, his fangs descending.
Ransom’s eyes narrowed, and he shifted on his feet. “I’m not your enemy, brother. You need to—”
Lachlan growled, taking a step toward Ransom—
And stopped a breath away from Lyric who suddenly stood before Ransom. She’d moved so fast I hadn’t even felt her leave my side.
“Lachlan,” she said in a tone I’d never heard before—a combination of power and compassion. “I know we’ve all wanted to impale Ransom at one time or another,” she continued in a lighter tone. “But please, not before dinner.”
Ransom huffed a laugh from behind her, some of that fire lessening in his eyes. It was replaced with true concern as he stared down Lachlan.
And my heart ached in my chest as I watched Lachlan blink a few times, almost as if he couldn’t see Lyric or Ransom very well. Almost as if he’d just woken up from a bad dream. I took a couple of steps toward the trio but paused when his head snapped my direction.
The breath stalled in my lungs at the way his eyes pierced mine. It wasn’t in the way I was used to—all lust and primal dominance and just the slight hint of wickedness. No, the way he looked at me now? It was pure agony and need, and it threatened to bring me to my knees.
“Dinner,” Lyric said, clearing her throat. “Lachlan, please. Will you join—”
“I can’t, my queen,” he said, his voice sounding like he’d raked it with sandpaper. He dipped his head, just a fraction, to both Lyric and Ransom, before stomping my direction.
I reached for him, wanting to—needing to touch him—but he increased his speed, blinking out of sight so quickly I wouldn’t have been able to catch him if I tried.
I hurried over to Lyric, who was having some kind of silent conversation with Ransom, before he flashed her a wink and stalked into the dining hall. “What the hell was that about?” I asked, breathless. “Do they fight like that all the time?”
“No,” Lyric said, shaking her head. “The Order has its spats, but it’s always more playful than painful.”
“That…” I shook my head, my eyes cast down the hall where Lachlan had disappeared. “That was utterly painful.”
“Can you feel it?” Lyric asked, and I snapped my attention back to her.
“What?”
She bit her lower lip, her eyes battling with something.
“What, Lyric?” My heart raced against my chest, an anxious swell swarming my stomach.
“Through the bond,” she said, wringing her hands before her. “I don’t know if it works for you like it does for me…because you haven’t accepted it. But when Alek…” her breath caught. “When Alek became overwhelmed with thirst, I felt it. Was able to help with the pain.”
I swallowed the knot in my throat. There was something, almost intangible, pulsing at the center of my soul. Like a beacon calling out for help—a sensation like being covered in sand, each grain acidic and searing against my soul.
“What are you saying?” I asked…but looking inward? I already knew the answer. He’d told me he was fine. Assured me he was taking care of himself.
Lyric’s shoulders sank. “Lachlan hasn’t been feeding.”
I was going to murder him.
13
Lachlan
“There has to be something else we can try,” I snapped at Gabriel as I prowled the length of the infirmary, pinching the skin between my eyes in the hopes that this fucking headache would let up.
I’d heaved up the contents of an entire blood bag about thirty minutes ago, and my head had been pounding ever since. The canned shit had never agreed with me, but desperate times and desperate whatever.
Our doctor shook his head and leaned back against the exam table. “It’s not like we’ve figured out a method for direct transfusion. I’m sorry Lachlan, but we’re kind of out of options here.”
“How long do you think I have?”
His eyebrows shot up and he cleared his throat. “This isn’t terminal, or anything. You just need to feed. Soon.”
No shit, Sherlock.
“Right. That’s what I meant. How long until I lose my fucking mind?” The hunger consumed almost every conscious thought. I heard the heartbeats of every single person in every single room, and Valor’s was the biggest bass drum of them all.
My throat burned like the Sahara, my vision was more thermal than not, and I was pretty sure my stomach was actually going to start eating itself if we didn’t find a solution that wasn’t Valor.
Valor. Agony pulsed through my fangs in sharp, staccato stabs. I was doing everything I could think of to stay away from her, to keep her safe. It had been days since I’d so much as put a hand on her soft skin or tasted her lips.
“It’s different for every one of us.” Gabriel watched me with careful eyes. “How long has it been since you’ve kept anything down?”
“Six…seven days?” I guessed. “And just the smell of other humans nauseates me. I was managing a few mouthfuls up until last week, but nothing now.” How the hell could we be one of the most medically advanced species and still not have a cure for this?
“Hmm. And how long has it been since you’ve had a full feeding?”
“I don’t know. Weeks?” I paused my pacing, trying to think back, but my brain wasn’t cooperating, which was on par with the rest of my body. Only my fangs and my cock seemed to function normally, and that was only for Valor.
“Shit.” Gabriel winced. “Look, I know you don’
t want to—”
“She’s not an option,” I growled as the floor shifted beneath me. It was a close call, but I managed to grab onto the exam table instead of crashing to the floor. My balance, my vision, my temper, it was all dangerously off. “I won’t force this on her. I won’t even ask it of her. You know what it will do to the bond.” Every time we touched, kissed, fucked, that connection between us strengthened. Soon, it wasn’t going to matter if we accepted the damned thing or not. It would be as permanent as a heartbeat.
“And you know what not feeding will do to you. What it could potentially do to her.” Gabriel sighed and muttered something about a stubborn jackass under his breath. “Eventually, you’ll give in to the craving.”
“How. Long?” I bit the words out. Giving in wasn’t an option.
“A day. Maybe two.”
“Fuck.”
“And that’s only if you’re lucky.”
My stomach plummeted to the floor.
* * *
“Wake up, sleepyhead.”
I stirred, breathing in the tantalizing scent of bergamot and lime. Mine.
A finger skimmed down my neck, sending jolts of electricity through my veins.
A heartbeat, strong and steady, filled my ears.
Hunger—ravenous and demanding—consumed every logical thought. Drink. Drink. Drink. The thirst beat at me relentlessly, and when I pried my eyes open, there were only cool lines and—Yes.
A shape throwing off waves of red and orange heat hovered above me.
My fangs erupted in my mouth, and I flipped my prey to its back, a startled gasp echoing somewhere in the back of my mind as I pinned its legs with my own and captured two small fists attached to delicate wrists.
A mumbled protest sounded somewhere.
I lowered my head to the prey’s neck and breathed deeply, preparing to strike, to feed.
Bergamot and lime. There was something about that combination that held me back, kept my fangs grazing the soft, silky skin instead of piercing it.
You can’t do this. The thought pierced through the fog of the hunt, sounding too much like my own to ignore.
“Lachlan?”
That voice…it belonged to someone I cared about. Someone I protected. Someone I couldn’t feed from.
“Lachlan, are you okay?” she asked.
She.
Valor.
My vision clicked back into normal parameters. That was Valor’s heartbeat in my ears, her scent on my tongue, her wide, terrified eyes looking up at me.
Valor. My mate.
“Fuck!” I sprung off the bed and backed myself into a corner of my bedroom, thrusting my hands out in front of me. “Get out. Now.”
“Oh, honey,” she whispered, the fear vanishing from those green depths as compassion took its place. “It’s okay.”
Drink. Drink. Drink.
I thrust my hands into the walls, busting through the drywall to grip the support beams. “Valor. You. Have. To. Get. Out.” Each word was a low growl.
“It will pass. Just give it a second,” she said softly, sitting up on her knees but staying on my bed. Her hair fell over her shoulder, and I couldn’t decide what I wanted more, to fuck her or feed from her. Yes, to both.
“Do you have any idea what I could have just done to you?” We were at the breaking point. She wasn’t safe around me.
“I have a good idea.” Her tongue skimmed over her lower lip, and I groaned, trying like hell to concentrate on staying where I was and not tackling her to the comforter and drowning in her taste. “I think I have a solution.”
“Does it include my fangs in your vein?” I snapped.
Her lips parted, and her eyes glazed slightly like she just might like the prospect.
Now you’re losing it.
“For fuck’s sake, woman—”
“I brought you options,” she said. “Are you under control?”
“You what?” My brow puckered, and maybe it was the confusion, but the hunger retreated slightly. I wasn’t fooled. It would come back twice as strong, like the wave that recedes from a shore only to return a tsunami. Valor had to get the hell away from me before it came back.
“I brought you options,” she repeated, studying me with a furrowed brow, then nodding as if she’d come to some decision. “Just wait right there.”
Like I was going fucking anywhere.
She slipped off the bed and strode toward the door, purpose in every step of those swaying hips.
First, I’d peel those shorts off her delectable body. Then, I’d part her thighs—
“What the hell are you doing?” I growled as she brought in a parade of humans. Four, to be exact.
“I brought you a buffet!” She grinned as she shut my bedroom door and motioned to the lineup. “I talked to Owen, who gave me some of your preferences.”
“You have to be fucking kidding me.” I’d never even had a human in my room before Valor, and now there were five. Their scents hit me all at once—garlic and mold, pepper and sweat, pungent fish, and…rotten eggs.
My stomach hurled, and I gagged, thankful there wasn’t anything in there to vomit up.
“You don’t want to feed from me—” Valor started.
“I never said that!” I countered.
“—so I’ve brought you Rose, who I believe is one of your brunette regulars.” Valor pointed to the first human like it was some kind of livestock show. “Stephanie.” The blonde eye-fucked me. “Hannah, whose red hair is natural, can you believe that color?”
“Valor,” I growled.
She walked to the end of the line. “And Chad, just in case you were in the mood for someone a little different.” She motioned to him like she was Vanna White.
“No.” I gritted my teeth. At least I’d slept in a pair of sweatpants, so my dick wasn’t hanging in the breeze. Not that it was exactly hanging with Valor in the room.
“You have to feed!” She glared at me, fear tinging her scent in a way that it hadn’t while I’d been poised at her throat. “I know what will happen to you if you don’t. You’ll either start going into stasis, or you’ll be driven bloodmad, and then your brothers will have to hunt you down. So please, Lachlan, feed!”
The high pitch of panic in her voice harnessed my hunger, forcing back the tide of craving, but my fangs were still long in my mouth, sharp against my lower lip, and not for any of them. For her. Only her.
“Get them out of here,” I demanded, my fingers digging into the support beams.
The women shifted on their feet uneasily, and the man’s gaze flickered between Valor and me, his scent shifting as adrenaline filled his veins. All four were from the Butcher’s Block, they were all willing feeders, but they weren’t the problem. I was.
“You’re being ridiculous,” Valor marched forward, but the man gripped her elbow, holding her back.
I hissed, my vision flashing thermal.
“I wouldn’t get that close to him. I’ve been around them when they’re starved like this and—"
“Get your fucking hands off my mate.” I yanked my fists from the wall, bringing chunks of drywall with them.
The women gasped. Chad paled and released his hold, dropping his hands to his sides.
Valor rolled her eyes.
“Get out before I show you exactly what happens when you touch a mate who doesn’t belong to you,” I warned in a voice I barely recognized as my own. It would take two seconds, three max, and the human would be a puddle of bones and blood on the floor.
All four of the humans fled, slamming the door behind them on the way out.
Valor sighed, long and loud, throwing her arms out to the side. “Fine. If you won’t feed on them, then you’re just going to have to try and stomach a little of me.” She tilted her head to the side, exposing the long, lean line of her neck.
My mouth watered, and before I could even think to hesitate, my body carried me across the bedroom. I’d wended without even trying.
I speared my fing
ers through her hair and palmed her ass, yanking her tight against my body.
She gasped, but that sweet, sharp scent she gave off wasn’t fear…it was anticipation.
“Is this what you want?” I asked, drawing my fangs down her skin without scoring it.
“It’s what you need.” She gripped my waist, her thumbs sliding down the V-line of my muscles.
“That is not what matters, and not what I asked you.” I caressed her waist as I moved my hand to her zipper and flicked open the button right above it. “Do. You. Want. This?”
I drew her zipper down.
“Lachlan.” She leaned up, her skin brushing against my lips.
The returning wave of hunger crept along the horizon, and I knew I only had seconds before it would consume us both. Biology beat out intentions every single time. It was why our species had survived this long.
“You have no idea what this will do to you—do to us.” But fuck, I wanted her, damn the consequences.
“You’ll be able to track me,” she said in a breathy whisper. “And not just that general feeling that comes through the bond. You’ll be able to sniff me out anywhere I go. It only hurts at first. I’ll be able to replace the blood volume in a few days because of some chemical in your saliva. I’m not a fool, Lachlan. I asked Lyric. I know what I’m suggesting.” Her breasts rose and fell against my chest with increasing speed. “Just do it.”
She was right there, her blood flowing fast and sweet beneath the translucent surface of her skin. “It will strengthen our bond. There’s no coming back from something like this.”
“You know what?” She shoved away from my chest, and I let her go.
Good. She could still save herself. The hunger roared in my ears.
“If you don’t want my blood, just say so.” She shook her head.
“What?” Shit, the roaring was getting louder, the craving gnawing a hole in my fucking stomach.
“You heard me! I know I’m the common denominator here. You could feed just fine before I moved in with you. So what is it? Do I smell bad? Make you sick? Because from what Lyric said, you’re supposed to want your mate, and yet I could probably peel off my clothes and present every inch of skin to you as an offering, and you’d still choose to starve to death!”
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