by Cindi Madsen
My cell phone rang and I groaned. Since Patricia had been calling nonstop, I’d programmed a special ring for her. “I’ve got to get that.”
“Where’s my report?” Patricia asked the second I answered.
“In your inbox. I stuck it there before I left.”
“I’m not going to the office tonight. E-mail it to me.”
Working to control my voice, I took a deep breath. I’d wanted to e-mail it in the first place; she was the one who’d insisted she wanted the large printout. “I can’t. I’m on my way to Barbara’s party and the files are on my work computer.”
“I thought you were going to be a team player. Now you can’t do it because of a party?”
“A party for one of our high-paying clients. It’s a great chance for me to network. I’ll e-mail you the information first thing tomorrow morning.”
Silence hung in the air for a few seconds before she snapped, “Fine. You know this is a big account. We can’t afford to screw it up.”
“I’ve got all the groundwork laid already. You just need to make the final decisions, then we’ll present it.”
“I expect it to be in my e-mail first thing tomorrow morning.”
“It’ll be there.” I let out a breath, frustration burning through me. Getting to choose my clients over the past year had spoiled me. Already this hotel thing was becoming a big headache.
When I ended the call, Jake was standing at my window, pouring a glass of water into my mostly dead plant. “I thought you said watering it was a waste of time,” I said.
“At first I thought you should put it out of its misery, but it won’t give up and I admire that.” Jake glanced around. “Where’s the other one?”
“It gave up.” His I-knew-it expression caused me to add, “I swear it wasn’t my fault. It was already on its way out when I got it here.” I tossed my keys and cell into my beaded clutch and hooked my hand in his elbow. “Now let’s go party.”
…
Waiters circled the large room, handing out champagne and appetizers. Nadine walked through the crowd, up to Jake and me. “I’m glad you guys are finally here.”
“That bad, huh?” I asked.
“I’ve been introduced to two different men who are about the same age as my grandfather.”
“And how’s Barbara tonight?”
“In top form. I think she’s got her eye on a new man. She’ll probably have husband number five before I’ve even had one.”
“That’s because you and Barbara have different criteria when it comes to husbands.” I glanced up. “Here she comes.”
Barbara greeted me with a couple of air kisses. “Good evening, darling.” She raised her eyebrows as her appraising gaze ran over my date. “And who’s this handsome gentleman?”
“This is Jake Knight,” I said. “Jake, Barbara Covington.”
Jake extended his hand. “Nice to meet you, Ms. Covington.”
“Call me Barbara.” She placed a hand on his forearm. “Darby, I’m going to steal your man and introduce him around the room.” She indicated a table in the corner. “My friends over there want to meet my fabulous decorators. After I showed them what you ladies are planning to do for me, several of them are thinking of remodeling, too. You should go introduce yourselves.”
Jake released my hand and followed Barbara, leaving Nadine and me standing alone.
“What now?” I asked.
“I guess we go try to land a few clients,” Nadine said. “Even though we won’t have time to do another job for months. I hate these commercial projects. Most of the year, you and I bring in our own clients and make Patricia a ton of money. The minute she gets the commercial jobs, she treats us like idiots.”
“I suppose we’ll just have to take turns working on our current projects and power through. Then we’ll get back to the fun ones.”
We put on our game faces and approached Barbara’s group of friends. Twenty minutes of talking about the many options and styles of decorating later, I started to worry about Jake. I glanced around the room and spotted him in the corner, several men and a few women around him. Barbara stood off to his left, talking to an impeccably dressed older man with a shiny bald head.
“I’m going to go reclaim my date,” I whispered to Nadine.
Nadine leaned closer. “If you see any guys under the age of forty-five, fifty, send them my way, will you?”
I think she was only half kidding. Setting my sights on Jake, I crossed the room. His back was to me as he spoke to the people around him. I squeezed my way into the group and put my hand on his elbow.
He glanced down and put his arm around me. “It was nice meeting you all.”
A couple of the men shook his hand before letting us go.
“What was that all about?” I asked, keeping a tight grip on him as we wove through the crowd. Finally we got to a fairly open space where we could stand without people bumping into us.
“When Barbara tried to feel out my financial stability, I told her I ran a taco shack,” Jake said.
I laughed. “You did not.”
“I teased her for a bit before telling her about Blue. Apparently it wasn’t impressive enough. She wanted to introduce me to a few people who might be able to help me find a better job. She said that if I wanted to be with a girl like you, I needed to get serious about providing you with all the luxuries you deserved.”
“I think she means well. I just don’t know why she insists you need to be in a relationship to be happy.”
Jake gripped the sides of my waist and drew me to him. “Well, there is something great about being with someone who knows how to cheer you up.”
I ran my fingers up his arms and hooked them behind his neck. “Or someone who will go to a boring party with you when you need him to?”
That irresistible smile of his spread across his face. “See, you’re finally getting it. Relationships aren’t all bad.” His hands moved to my back, pressing me against him. “Some of them work.”
I swallowed past my suddenly dry throat. I was having a hard time not focusing on his lips and thinking about what I wanted them to do to me. “I never said they were all bad.” My heart picked up speed, hammering against my rib cage. His gaze ran down me, burning everywhere it touched. Passion lit his eyes, leaving little question what he was thinking. It wasn’t just passion, though; there was tenderness there, too.
I could feel the threads forming, from my heart to his. Threads that would become strings, until I was all wrapped up in him and couldn’t separate myself from him without feeling like half a person.
Oh, shit, I’m in over my head. Panic squeezed my lungs, stealing my breath. I’d been here before too many times, and the last couple of relationships had nearly crushed me. They’d messed with my job, my sense of self—everything. I have to do something before it’s too late. I can’t do this to myself again. I won’t do this again. I took a step back, and the space between us felt wrong and torturous—another sure sign that this was getting too serious.
Jake’s eyebrows drew together, the confusion on his features clear.
I rubbed the back of my neck. “I like spending time with you, Jake. You’ve been really great, and I’m afraid I’m starting to give you the wrong impression. I’m not going to change my mind about doing the relationship thing.” Looking at him was painful, so I dropped my gaze, focusing on the refracted light bouncing off the wall. “I think we should stop spending so much time together before someone ends up getting hurt.”
I jumped when a hand came down on my shoulder.
“How are you two doing?” It was Barbara. After all the hours I’d spent listening to her talk, her voice was ingrained in my head. “Several of my friends are talking about working with you and Nadine.” Barbara glanced at Jake, her lips curving up. “And I’ve heard nothing but good things about you, young man. I’m sure there will be several business opportunities coming your way soon.”
“That’s good to hear,” Jake said. I could
tell he had to work at a smile. Knowing there was pain buried in it—and that it was my fault—sent a pang through my chest. “But honestly, I’m very happy with my job. And Darby’s made it clear she doesn’t need or want anyone to take care of her.”
The ache in my chest deepened, and tears pricked my eyes. I quickly blinked them away. Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry.
Barbara dismissed the idea with a wave of her hand. “That’s what women always say. Secretly they love a man to come in and sweep them off their feet.”
“I prefer to have my feet on the ground, actually,” I said. “That way you always remember how to walk on your own.”
“Darling, you’ll miss out if you don’t allow yourself to be swept away now and then.” Barbara patted Jake’s arm. “I can tell this guy cares about you. He held up very well under my scrutiny.” She glanced around. “I better go attend to some of my other guests, but you two have a wonderful evening.”
Not wanting to deal with the weirdness I was sure Jake and I were about to have, I watched her walk away. Finally, I looked at him. “I can get Nadine to give me a ride home.”
Jake ran a hand through his hair. “A few minutes ago we were fine, and suddenly you can’t even stand me for the rest of the night?”
“I’m just saying if you want to leave, you can. I’d understand.”
“Do you want me to go?”
I shook my head. “Like I said, I have fun with you. I’m only trying to be honest.” Only trying to keep my heart in one piece so it won’t get ripped apart again.
Over the next hour, Jake stuck by my side, almost as if nothing happened, but the smiles and casual touches were gone. We heard stories about grandkids, all about what companies to invest in, and heated discussions on the state the country was in.
When we got back to our building, I punched the elevator button for my floor. The ride took an eternity, and it felt like the walls were closing in on me. Everything was awkward and strained, the ease of the past few weeks with Jake effectively destroyed.
The doors opened and Jake started to step off the elevator with me.
“You don’t have to walk me to my door,” I said.
Jake put his hand on my back, guiding me down the hall anyway. Part of me wondered if he’d heard me at all tonight. Did he get that everything needed to change? That if I didn’t draw a line, we’d both regret it later?
The walk down the hall took three times as long as it usually did. Finally, miracle of all miracles, we reached my door. Knowing looking at Jake was dangerous, I focused on my hands, twisting the bracelet on my wrist. “Thanks again for coming with me tonight. I’m sure I’ll see you around.”
Jake exhaled, and I could hear the frustration in it. “Is that your way of telling me not to call you?”
I continued spinning the bracelet, round and round. “No. But I’m going to be busy with this job, and I should be helping Steph with the wedding planning more.”
Jake put his hand on my wrist, making it impossible to keep spinning my bracelet. “So if I asked you to hang out with me on Sunday morning?”
Slipping would be so easy, and I couldn’t let myself do it. I kept my eyes glued to his long fingers wrapped around my wrist. “I’d say it’s not a good idea.”
Jake put his other hand under my chin, gently tipping it up until I had no choice but to look at him. He pressed a gentle kiss to my lips. “I’ll see you around, Darby.”
I watched him walk away. Waiting around until I found his fatal flaw was taking too long, and I just couldn’t afford to get more attached. Already, I’d been relying on him too much. I couldn’t deal with everything going down at work and a relationship that was getting too serious. When the relationship failed, I’d still need my job. It’s what got me through every time my heart had been broken, and I couldn’t screw it up.
I felt each one of the threads that had started to form between us snap, a dozen pricks of pain in my heart. They stung, but at least I knew I could survive them.
Good-bye, Jake.
Next time I decided to have a semi-long-term relationship, I was going to go for someone who wasn’t so hard to resist.
Chapter Twenty-three
There were two relationships I tried not to think about—unless it was to remind myself of the pain love could bring. So whenever I started thinking I was an idiot for letting Jake go, I opened up those memories and let the residual heartache wash over me. I even went so far as to break out my case studies.
I stared at Robert’s name until the letters bled together. Before I’d met him, I’d decided all guys were immature idiots. But he was different. I remember thinking it was a miracle that I’d met a mature, amazing, and funny guy.
I thought he might just be the one.
Robin Hood Case Study: Robert/Robin Hood
My Age: 25
I was at The Bullpen Bar with Steph, Nadine, and a few other friends. After giving up on a waiter to come by, I’d left my friends at the table to go get a drink. I was waiting by the packed bar when someone tapped me on the shoulder.
“Hey, you,” a male voice said. “Come look at this.”
Not bothering to glance at him, I said, “I’m sorry, I don’t respond to, ‘hey you.’ Get someone else to look at it.”
“What’s your name?”
I turned back to tell the guy to get lost. But his green eyes, strong jaw, and wavy, blond hair made me rethink blowing him off. It took a few seconds to figure out why he was looking at me, eyebrows raised, like he was waiting for something. Oh, right. He asked me a question.
“Darby. My name’s Darby.”
“Hi, Darby. I’m Robert. Now, will you come look at this for me? It’s pretty important, and my friend and I need an objective eye.” He glanced at the money in my hand. “Afterward, I’ll buy you a drink.”
I eyed him for a moment. What’s the worst that could happen?
“Okay,” I said, backing away from the bar. “Show me what’s so important.”
Robert grabbed my hand and led me across the room. “Don’t you dare touch it, Joe,” he said as we approached a pudgy guy. “I swear if you cheated—”
“I don’t need to cheat,” Joe said. “Because I already won.”
“Darby’s going to judge it.” Robert stopped in front of the dartboard hanging on the wall.
I pointed at it. “This? This is what’s so important?”
“Look, we’ve got fifty bucks on this. Joe thinks—”
“Hey, no biasing her,” Joe said.
“Okay, add up the points of the red darts and the blue darts. I won’t even tell you whose is whose. Then tell us the score.”
The board was older, beat-up. Unlike some of the ones I’d seen, it didn’t have metallic dividers. A few darts had hit right on the line, making it hard to decide what score to go with. Specifically, there was one blue dart between the six-point white and ten-point black. I leaned in and studied it.
Looks more six than ten to me.
“Red’s the winner,” I said.
“No way!” Joe yelled.
Robert shouted, “Suck it!” while pumping his fists in the air. (I know I said mature, and this isn’t exactly a mature moment, but I’ll get to that part later.) He put his arm around me. “Come on, Darby. Let’s get you that drink.”
When I got back to my table a few minutes later, Steph leaned in and whispered, “Who was that guy?”
“His name’s Robert. He needed me to judge a game of darts.”
“Did he get your number?”
I shook my head. “It’s not like he handpicked me. I just happened to be the first person he could find.”
Stephanie looked over my head at Robert and Joe. “He’s cute. You should go get his number.”
“Don’t stare.” I raised my voice to talk to the rest of the girls. “What did I miss?”
The girls caught me up on their conversation, which had mostly been about Nadine’s recently exed-boyfriend.
Stephanie nudg
ed me. “He’s coming over here.”
Robert walked up to our table, his eyes on me. One corner of his mouth lifted. “Hey, you. Up for a game of darts?”
“You forgot my name already?” I asked.
The other side of his mouth got in on the smile. “No. But since you made it clear how much you like to be called, ‘hey you,’ I decided to go with that.” He put his hand on the back of my chair. “Come on. Joe’s lost three in a row, so I’ll send him over to talk to your friends.”
“Make sure you show our girl a good time.” Steph pushed me, hard enough I almost fell out of my chair.
I shot her a dirty look, then followed Robert back to the dartboard. He handed me the three red darts. “You can go first.”
I’d never played darts before, but I figured it couldn’t be that difficult. I aimed and tossed one. It barely landed in the bottom of the board, giving me all of three points. “Wow, it’s harder than it looks.”
“Here, I’ll show you how to throw it.” Robert stepped behind me.
“You’re not going to do that whole put-your-arms-around-me-because-you-think-I’m-too-stupid-to-get-it-from-a-simple-explanation thing, are you?”
Robert dropped his arms. “Not anymore.”
I aimed higher, tossed my second dart, and watched it land to the right of the bull’s-eye, giving me thirteen points. “I think I got it.”
After several games—all of which I’d lost, even with the pity points he gave me—Robert held up his last dart. “Okay, how about if I hit the bull’s-eye, you go out with me this weekend.”
I hadn’t flirted in a while, but the guy was cute, and I figured I didn’t really have much to lose. “Are you that sure you can hit it? Or are your feelings for me so mediocre you’d risk it all on a game of darts?”
A cocky smile spread across his face. “I figure if I actually hit the bull’s-eye you’ll go out with me. But if I don’t, you’ll be so flattered that I’ve worked so hard to win you over, you’ll at least give me your number.”