Maybe I should just say that we can’t embark on a relationship because we’re business partners. But I also happen to know that the guys who bought us our, the ones who are our new business partners, are all in a relationship together with one of their admin girls. So it’s kind of a weak excuse.
And honestly, I don’t want to close that door, which scares me more than anything.
I let out a roar of frustration and push to my feet. In the process, I knock a bunch of crap off my desk, making a ruckus as it clatters to the floor.
Annoyed, I start to clean up, but a few moments later, the door creaks open. A woman peeks in, wielding an opened stapler in one hand like a weapon. All I can make out in the shitty light is the armed hand and a female curvy silhouette. “Is someone in here?”
“It’s Mr. Clarke, sorry to scare you,” I reply, “You can go ahead and turn that light on.”
I hear a sharp intake of breath and there’s a long pause. “Um…hello?” I call.
There’s a soft sigh and the light flicks on. I blink for a moment, but when my vision clears, I finally get my first good look at this stapler-wielding vigilante.
“Hello, Elijah,” Audrey sighs, leaning in the doorway.
“Audrey?”
“I thought you were someone breaking in,” she says, “Sorry, I don’t want to interrupt you.”
She starts to leave and I get to my feet. “Whoa, whoa, no, hey, where do you think you’re going? What are you even doing here?”
“Besides making a fool of myself?”
I ignore the sarcasm and give her an expectant look, waiting. “I work here,” she explains finally, “I’m your new head of HR.”
This has to be some kind of cruel joke from the universe.
Although I have to admit, as I look at her now, head clear of liquor and impulsiveness, it hardly seems cruel that I get to look at this fucking body here at work. She’s even hotter than my drunken memories gave her credit for: Soft, sexy curves, plush, inviting lips, and these huge, doe-like eyes.
Those eyes may give her a sweet, innocent look, but I’ve seen those big blue orbs peering up through dark lashes while I was balls-deep in that dirty little mouth of hers.
My dick twitches at the thought, but I force myself to focus. “Does Leon know?”
“Yes, and I’ll tell you what I told him: As far as I’m concerned, that night never happened, and my relationship with both of you is strictly professional,” she says in a tone that sounds like she’s been rehearsing it all day.
“Audrey-“
“Please,” she says, and something about the tone of it makes me stop.
She sounds shaky, like she might cry, and above that, she sounds exhausted. She sounds the way I feel.
Maybe I’m just projecting, but when I look at her, I see a familiar kind of stress in her face that chills me. It tells me that she’s been thinking about this as much as I have. And probably Leon, too. But I can’t figure out why she looks so distraught. I mean, sure, the fact that we’re now her bosses makes the whole thing weird, but it’s not like she knew that at the time.
But whatever is running through her head, I don’t want to tip her over the breaking point. So I play along. “What’s your last name?” I ask her.
“What?” she asks, clearly caught off guard.
“If you’d prefer to keep things professional, I’ll need to know how to address you,” I explain.
A small smile turns up the corners of her lips and I can practically see how grateful she is for the reprieve. “You don’t have to go that far, but thank you,” she says softly, “And for future reference, it’s Sinclair.”
“A pleasure to meet you, Ms. Sinclair,” I offer her a hand.
I try not to think about exactly what a pleasure it was.
“Thank you, Mr. Clarke,” she takes my hand to shake and immediately, I know touching her was a mistake if I want to keep my distance.
Her soft skin on mine opens the dam to a flood of filthy flashbacks and I remember those long fingers stroking the base of my shaft and fondling my balls while she was sucking me off. My cock throbs, responding to her touch with intensity that surprises me.
I’ve dated lots of hot women, but fuck, I’ve never been with someone whose handshake could make me hard.
There’s a long silence, and finally I realize I’m still holding her hand, so I quickly let her go.
Her cheeks redden and she clears her throat. “Well, I was just heading out, so if everything’s ok in here,” she says, trailing off.
“It’s fine. Thanks for checking, though.”
She flashes me a shy smile. “No problem. Goodnight, Mr. Clarke.”
“Goodnight, Ms. Sinclair.”
Chapter Five
Audrey
While the interaction with Elijah had been smoother than the one with Leon, it leaves me more confused than ever. Sitting in my car, I’m trying to collect myself enough to drive home.
I swear my lips are still tingling from Leon’s kiss this morning, and I can’t tell if I want to laugh or cry. This situation just gets more ridiculous by the minute. I’d spent the last two weeks resigning myself to life as a single mom, sure that I’d never see the guys again, but now, not only do I know exactly who they are, but I’m going to be working with them.
And all day, my mind has been drifting back to Leon’s offer. Seeing him in person again, I realized that my liquor-soaked memories had done him no justice. He’s even more chiseled and sexy in the flesh, and to have his hands on me?
I’d wanted to give in. Fuck, I’d wanted it. I’d wanted to let him bend me over and rail me right there at my desk. And I’d wanted to let him take me on a date, to get to know the man behind those intense green eyes.
But he’s my boss, and on top of that, I might be carrying his baby. How the fuck am I supposed to start any kind of relationship with that kind of beginning?
I groan and lean back in my seat, letting my hands fall away from the steering wheel. And what about Elijah? Much like Leon, he was even more attractive in person while sober. Plus, the way he had backed off intrigued me. I got the impression from that first glance that he wanted me as badly as I wanted him, but he’d just backed off and played along.
Was he playing me?
My stomach lurches for the millionth time this morning and I lean back, taking deep breaths in the hopes that I won’t have to fly for the bathroom again.
As I stare at the ceiling, tears well in my eyes. A million thoughts are running through my head, and I know I have to decide what I’m going to do soon. With the morning sickness, people are already asking questions, and I only have a few months before I’ll start to show.
I know I’ll eventually have to sit down with Elijah and Leon and tell them the truth, and I have no idea how to have that conversation. And even once I’ve told them, then what happens?
Or what happens if I keep my mouth shut? Maybe they’ll just assume I sleep around and that night with them was just one of dozens of flings.
The idea of lying like that sends a stab of guilt through my chest, but I don’t know how to handle this. No matter what I choose, it feels like I can’t win.
I finally start my car and head for home.
When I walk in the door, Gwen’s curled on the couch watching Bones reruns. She takes one look at me and her eyebrows shoot up. “What happened?”
The comment is lacking all of her usual snark, replaced with worry. I must look like shit.
“I, uh, met the new partners today,” I tell her, my voice wavering.
“Uh-huh…” Gwen makes a “go on” gesture with her hand.
It finally hits me and I just shatter, burying my face in my hands as I dissolve into tears.
“Whoa, hey, come here,” Gwen gets to her feet and pulls me over to the couch, sitting with me and pulling me into an embrace, “You’ll find another job, it’s ok,” she strokes my hair.
I let out a sound that’s half-sob, half-laugh. “I didn’t get f
ired.”
“So what happened?” Gwen asks, confused and concerned.
Tears overwhelm me again and I lose the ability to speak, so Gwen makes a few more guesses. “Were they dicks to you? Did they harass you?”
I can already hear her gearing up to go on a rampage, so I shake my head. “They’re the ones from Jessie’s party,” I finally manage to say, “One of them is my baby daddy.”
Gwen lets out a low whistle. “Oh, jeez.”
“I don’t know what the hell to do,” I pull back and wipe at my eyes, hiccupping, “I don’t know how long I can hide this.”
“I don’t think you should,” Gwen says.
I look at her, shocked. “What?”
“I don’t think you should hide it. Especially from Leon and Elijah, I think you need to tell them right away.”
It’s definitely not the answer I was expecting, and I’m not sure how to reply, so Gwen continues: “Whether you like it or not, they’re part of this. One of them is your kid’s father. It was one thing when you weren’t sure how to find them, but now they’re right here in front of you. There’s no excuse not to tell them. They have a right to know.”
The words hit home; I realize she’s completely right, that the idea of trying to keep it a secret from them was selfish and cowardly.
“Here’s the thing, Audrey,” Gwen goes on, “You have always been this enormous control freak, but you’re going to have to let that go. Other people have a voice here, and sometimes you’re going to have to say and hear things that you aren’t gonna like. And you know what? That’s going to get even worse when you’re a parent. You will be responsible for an entire little person with their own thoughts and opinions, their own perspective, and they’re going to do things that make you insane. So I think it’s a lesson you’d better learn quick, or you’re going to spend a lot of time miserable.”
“When did you get so wise and mature?” I grumble.
She shrugs. “Probably the near-death experience?” she offers.
“That’s a little dark,” I snicker, wiping at my eyes again.
“Made you laugh, didn’t it?” she shoots back, passing me a tissue.
“Ok, but then what? I tell them and then what happens? Do I get a DNA test? Can I even do that before the baby’s born? And then what happens at work? Everyone’s gonna find out I-“
“Stop!” Gwen snaps, drawing me out of my increasingly panicked ramblings, “This is exactly what I was just talking about. You’re trying to plan and control this already by yourself. For fuck’s sake, just take things one step at a time!”
It stings a bit to hear it, but she’s right. I’m already trying to jump three steps ahead before I’ve even given Leon and Elijah a chance to offer their input. Like it or not, the three of us are in this together.
She takes my hand and gives it a squeeze, her expression softening. “Look, maybe this is just me being superstitious and sappy, but I think there’s a reason these guys are in your life. The universe keeps bringing them right to you, so maybe you should take the hint and get to know them.”
I hadn’t really thought of it that way. But honestly, I can’t tell if I genuinely believe it or if I’m just that eager to latch onto an excuse for another chance with them.
I sigh. “You might be right, Gwen.”
“Duh,” she replies, “I’m always right.”
Chapter Six
Leon
When my phone rings and I actually see Elijah’s name on the screen, I’m shocked. Even though I sent him that message, I guess I was expecting him to keep avoiding me.
I swipe across the screen. “Hello?”
“Hey, Leon.”
Just the sound of my name in his voice is enough to call forth a torrent of feelings, but I ignore them. “I got your message to call you,” he continues.
“Yeah,” I lean back in my chair, “I just wanted to give you the heads-up, Darren’s HR manager is-“
“Audrey. Yeah, I stopped at the office before I called,” he admits, “Ran into her.”
Wonder how that went.
I don’t really know how to respond, other than “Oh.”
I hadn’t expected this conversation to occur at all, so I hadn’t exactly planned out what to say. But then on the other end of the phone, I hear a heavy sigh. “Listen, Leon, can we talk? Face to face?”
The words are both terrifying and thrilling, but I keep my calm. “You’ve always known where to find me, Elijah.”
“I’ll be over soon,” he replies, and the words hit me like a freight train.
He’s finally going to face this. But is he going to finally embrace who he is, or is he going to run from this the way Audrey apparently is?
My heart is in my throat, but I choke out the words: “See you in a few,” before hanging up.
First Audrey, now this. With the way my day’s been going, I’m bracing myself for another rejection, but at this point, I just hope I don’t lose him completely.
The ten minutes or so before he gets to my place feel like an eternity, and I can’t figure out what to do with myself. I try and go back to what I was doing before he called, but I can’t focus on the book I was reading.
I end up just pacing, full of anxious energy I desperately need to burn off.
To my surprise, though, even as I’m running through a thousand thoughts about Elijah, Audrey keeps popping into my head, interrupting the thoughts.
Seeing her again was like tossing a grenade into the tornado already going on in my mind, and to have both of them out of my reach was maddening.
I hear the slam of a car door outside and I freeze.
I decide “the hell with it,” and just open the front door. He knows I’m waiting for him, it would be stupid to pretend that I’m not.
Even from a few feet away, I can spot what a mess he is. His face is scruffy and unshaven, there are deep bags under his eyes, and I notice that his suit seems to hang a little looser on his muscular frame than usual.
He sees me in the doorway and his pace quickens a little, to my surprise.
As he comes closer, I start to greet him, but I don’t have time to speak before he grabs the front of my shirt and his lips crash into mine, his other hand cupping the back of my head.
I taste the metallic tang of blood in my mouth, but the sting of a split lip is washed away in the waves of shock and joy.
When he finally tears his mouth from mine, both of us panting hard, he lets go of my shirt. “Leon, I’m sorry,” he says, “I’m so fucking sorry.”
I’m speechless. I can’t even process what just happened, let alone his words. “Let’s, um-“ I shake my head, as if clearing away the daze, “Come inside.”
I lead Elijah into the house and the two of us sit on my couch. I sit quietly and wait for Elijah to say what he needs to say.
“I’ve been dodging you for weeks, and I’m sorry. It was shitty of me, but I still don’t know what the fuck is going through my head,” he says.
“I kind of know what you mean,” I admit with a bitter little laugh, thinking of my own confusion about Audrey.
“What we did scared the shit out of me because it felt so fucking right, Leon,” he says, his voice rough with emotion, “I’ve wanted you for years, and I’ve fought myself so goddamn hard, giving in…”
He stands up, looking at a painting on the wall, and I can tell it’s so he can avoid looking at me. “It was fucking incredible. Being with you and Audrey was the first fucking time in my life where everything felt right, even if I was shitfaced.”
“You say that, but you drank less than I did,” I remind him.
“Whatever, so I’m a lightweight on top of being a pussy, sue me,” he says with a light laugh, flipping me the bird.
The moment has the desired effect and I can see him relax a little. But then he takes a deep breath and starts to speak again. “When I was eight, my dad caught me kissing my friend Aaron,” he says.
He’s trying to maintain his composure,
but I can hear the tremor in his voice. “He went fucking ballistic.”
I feel sick as he goes on, even though I suspect I know where the story is going. Elijah seldom talked about his dad, short of mentioning that the man was in prison, but a few of the things he’d said about him in passing had led me to believe the man was abusive.
“Aaron took off when my dad grabbed me. Went and got a neighbor. If it weren’t for them, I probably wouldn’t have made it.”
My limbs turn to ice. He might have glossed over the details, but my mind fills in the blanks. And it almost fucking breaks me to imagine him as a little boy, broken and bleeding, all because of a kiss.
“I’m not trying to make you feel sorry for me, or make excuses, but I think all this time, that day has just been in the back of my head, and I just can’t-“ his voice fails him and he clears his throat, blinking rapidly, “I don’t know how to get past that fear,” he whispers.
I make my way over to him and grip his arm. “It’s not going to be easy,” I admit, “But I’m here for you. We can help you work it out together.”
He screws his eyes shut and I continue: “Eli, if you know in your heart that you want to be with me, fuck everything else. You don’t have to figure out everything right now, but we can take this a step at a time. You don’t have to do everything alone.”
He swallows hard and opens his eyes, and I can see the sheen of tears over them that he’s fighting. “Just let me in, Eli. Let me help you, let me love you, and the rest, we’ll figure out as we go.”
There’s a long pause, and for a moment, I worry that I’ve pushed too far and he’s gonna run again, but then he lets his eyes fall closed again, lets out a breath, and nods. “Ok.”
With that tiny word of permission, I pull him to me and kiss him. He responds in kind, throwing himself at me with such fervor that I nearly tip over backwards. I claw at his shirt and rip it over his head.
Just One Night (Just Us Series Book 4) Page 3