Honeymoon from Hell I

by R. L. Mathewson

  can forget this ever happened. We can go to Europe, on a cruise, to Mexico, we can….,” he trailed off when he heard what sounded suspiciously like a snort of amusement.

  “Are you laughing at me?” he demanded, his eyes narrowing in the dark as the ungrateful woman in his arms started to giggle uncontrollably.

  “Yes!” she managed to get out on a gasp as she continued to laugh her adorable little ass off while he sat there, rightfully seething.

  How dare she laugh at him and the wonderful honeymoon that he’d worked his ass off to give her?

  Without another word, he picked up his ungrateful wife and placed her back on her side before he folded his arms over his chest and pointedly looked away with a sniff, not caring that she couldn’t see the move. After everything that he’d done to give her the perfect honeymoon and this was how she repaid him?

  “Jason?” his inconsiderate wife said around a snort of amusement.

  “Go away.”

  “I’m sorry!” she said, and he probably would have believed her if she hadn’t started laughing again.

  “That’s it. I want a divorce,” he said firmly, wondering just how hard it would be to get their marriage annulled.

  “Jason,” she said around a snort of amusement as she reached for him, but he pulled away and shifted closer to the door, refusing to allow the vicious woman to fill his head with patronizing apologies and caresses when they both knew that she didn’t mean any of it.

  “I believe we’ve said everything that needs to be said,” he said with a sniff as he once again pulled away from her touch.

  “Jason-”

  “Save if for the judge.”

  “But-”

  “I’ll be damned if I stay in a loveless marriage!”

  There was a slight pause before she said, “A loveless marriage,” in a tone that he did not care for, not at all.

  “I think it would be for the best if we didn’t say anything else.”

  “I see,” she murmured thoughtfully as he sat there, wondering how he’d missed the fact that he’d married such a heartless woman when he felt something wet dropped onto his lap. Frowning, he reached down and picked up the soaked rag.

  “What’s this?” he asked, trying to figure out why she was throwing things at him.

  “My nightie,” she said, sounding bored as he sat there, letting her words sink in and when they did, he slowly dropped the expensive wet rag on the floor of his truck with a murmured, “So, you’re naked?”

  “Completely.”

  “The panties?” he asked, reaching back and grabbed a hold of the wet shirt clinging to his back and slowly dragged it off.

  “Drying on your dashboard.”

  He toed off his waterlogged shoes as he unsnapped his jeans and shoved the soaked, uncooperative material off along with his boxers. This time when he felt her reach for him, he didn’t back away. When he felt her small hand land on his knee, he shifted at an angle and groaned when he felt her talented lips wrap around the tip of his cock.

  Licking his lips, he carefully threaded his fingers through her wet, tangled hair and somehow resisted the urge to the shift his hips when he felt her mouth slowly slide down his cock. With his other hand, he ran his hand over her back, making note of the cool skin covered in goose bumps before he skimmed his hand over her perfectly rounded ass and found what he was looking for.

  “So fucking wet,” he growled approvingly as he slid a finger inside her.

  “Do you still want a divorce?” she asked as she pulled her mouth free from his cock.

  “I don’t think it’s a good idea to talk to you without my lawyer present,” he explained as he slowly slid his finger out of her only to slide it back in, earning a sexy little moan that had him arching his hips.

  “That’s probably a good idea,” she murmured in agreement as she opened her mouth so that he could slide inside and lose his fucking mind.

  Chapter 9

  “Oh God…”

  Breaths coming faster, she moved her mouth down the large, thick erection sliding between her lips. She loved doing this for him, loved the feel of him sliding in her mouth, the noises that he made as he started to lose control, but more than anything, she loved it when he finally lost control.

  “Baby, stop,” he pleaded even as he continued to roll his hips, sliding his cock inside her mouth.

  She gladly took it as she reached between his legs and gently cupped his balls in her hand. She ran her hand over the cool silk skin, gently squeezing them as she allowed her teeth to graze the underside of his cock, earning a loud pained groan that told her everything that she needed to know.

  He wasn’t going to last very much longer, which made this the perfect time to settle something.

  “You still want a divorce?” she asked, pulling out of reach so that the next time that large cock glided towards her, she could trace the underside with her tongue.

  “I believe we’ve already discussed this,” he said, sliding a second finger inside her.

  “You know that I love you, right?” she whispered as she spread her legs a little wider and pushed back against his hand as she kissed the tip of his cock.

  “Yes,” he hissed in pleasure as she teased the thick, sensitive head with her tongue.

  “Do you love me?” she asked on a gasp as she pushed back against his fingers.

  “More than anything,” he promised and since all she cared about was him knowing just how much she loved him, she returned her attention to the large erection straining to get to her.

  She took the large head back into her mouth and slowly sucked on it as she gave his balls one last gentle squeeze. The sexy growl he released had her eyes flickering shut in pleasure while she pushed back against his hand, faster and harder until she was riding his hand, gasping and moaning as she greedily took him in her mouth.

  “Oh, fuck,” Jason groaned, thrusting his fingers in her harder. “Baby, I’m not going to last if you keep-”

  “What the hell are you doing blocking my driveway?”

  *-*-*-*

  “Does your wife want to go warm up in the house?” Ed, the retired mechanic who owned the house and woods that they were currently parked in front of, asked not bothering to look up from the bolt that he was currently tightening.

  Shifting his attention away from what Ed was doing to his engine, Jason looked around the popped hood of his truck to find Haley, still curled up in the fetal position lying across his bench seat. Sighing heavily, he shook his head. “No, I think she’s good,” he said even as he had to wonder if she was ever going to be able to look him in the eye again.

  Then again, she had been caught giving him a blowjob by a seventy-year-old man wielding a flashlight and a baseball bat, he reminded himself as he focused his attention back to what Ed was doing. She’d probably never get over this, he realized, sending a silent apology to his poor cock.

  “She’ll get over it,” Ed said with a knowing smile and a chuckle as he released the latch and let the hood drop shut. “Just give her some time.”

  Jason chuckled as he picked up the large toolbox for Ed. “I could give her the rest of our lives and there’s no way in hell that she’s ever going to be able to forget this trip.”

  “That bad, huh?” Ed asked, taking the toolbox from Jason and tossed it in the back of his truck.

  “It’s definitely one for the record books,” Jason said, rubbing the back of his neck as he slowly exhaled. “I should have known better.”

  Ed cocked a brow in question. “I’m guessing there’s an interesting story behind that comment.”

  “You could say that,” he said absently, regretting not listening to his father and uncles when they’d tried to warn him against taking Haley for a honeymoon before the year mark was up, but he’d been so determined to do right by her that he’d simply shrugged it off as more Bradford bullshit meant to fuck with his head.

  “I’m not sure what your plans are now, but if you want to try and salvage
this honeymoon of yours, there’s this little bed and breakfast not too far from here that just might do the trick,” Ed said with a pointed look towards the truck where Haley was probably praying for a hole to open up and swallow her whole.

  “I don’t think there’s any chance of salvaging this honeymoon,” he finally admitted to himself, giving up any hope of making this right for the woman who deserved better and settled on praying that he was able to get her home before anything else could go wrong.

  *-*-*-*

  “Do you want me to drive?” she asked, worrying her bottom lip as she watched Jason struggling not to lose it.

  “No.”

  “Are you sure?” she asked just as the very angry police office returned with Jason’s Driver’s license, registration and what appeared to be that speeding ticket that he’d threatened Jason with when he’d pulled them over.

  “Yes,” he bit out as he accepted the items from the police officer intent on sending him one last glare before he walked away.

  Not really sure how to deal with Jason when he was like this, because she’d honestly never seen him quite like this before, she settled on nodding and pulling the damp, mud-caked, torn blanket tightly around herself and shifted her attention back to her window and her earlier thoughts. Maybe she should bake him a cake or ten? she wondered, already knowing that wouldn’t be enough to fix this.

  God, why did she have to take off her glasses? Why couldn’t she have just left them on and accepted the fact that she wasn’t sexy? She should have just brushed her hair, threw on a little blush, a little lop gloss and the Yankees panty set and made the best of it.

  Now thanks to her aspirations to become a Victoria Secret model, their honeymoon was ruined, their luggage was destroyed, they’d spent the night on the side of the road where they were caught doing… things, got into one fender bender, managed to get three speeding tickets, a cracked window, and they were heading home in a truck that she wasn’t really sure was going to make it. He’d worked so hard to give her the perfect honeymoon and she’d ruined it.

  “I’m sorry, Jason,” she whispered, wondering how she was going to make this up to him.

  When he didn’t say anything, she decided that it was probably for the best. Their honeymoon was already ruined and there was no sense in adding a fight to make things worse. Sighing, she drew her knees up to her chest and settled on staring out the window, counting down the minutes until she could take a hot shower, climb in bed with Jason and put this whole thing behind them.

  “Oh, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” Jason said right around the time the familiar weird chuffing and clanking noise started up again. “This cannot be fucking happening.”

  Since she had a pretty good idea what was happening thanks to the incident this morning, she decided to keep her mouth shut while Jason slammed his fists against the dashboard.

  “Son of a bitch!”

  Yeah, definitely a good time to keep her mouth shut, she decided as she pushed her glasses back up her nose. At least they were only a few blocks away from home, she thought with a sigh of relief as she adjusted the filthy blanket that she was going to throw away just as soon as they got home, around her.

  Without a word, and to be honest, at this point she wasn’t really expecting him to say anything to her, he popped the hood and climbed out of the truck, slamming the door shut behind him and making her wonder if she should walk the short distance home and make him something to eat.

  “Fucking unbelievable!” he shouted, making her sigh as she resigned herself to an interesting walk home.

  Chapter 10

  “What the hell are you doing?” he asked, trying to make sense out of what he was seeing.

  “I’m walking home,” she said with a pained groan as she gave up on trying to put her foot down and settled on hugging the large oak tree in front of the Jacobson’s house instead.

  “I see,” he murmured thoughtfully as he glanced back over his shoulder at his truck, which was less than ten feet away, and then back at his wife as she struggled to hold her blanket up while she held onto the tree for dear life.

  When she just stood there, trying to…

  Well, he had no idea what the hell she was trying to do, he realized as he rubbed his hands down his face and accepted the loss of his truck. If it had happened any other day, at any other time, he would have bitched and moaned about it, but he had no room to complain, not after he’d been warned. They’d told him about the curse when he was a child, but even to a child their dire warnings had sounded like bullshit.

  When his father and a few of his uncles had taken him aside to plead with him to put off their honeymoon for a year, he’d shrugged it off, not really listening to them, and told them that he’d take his chances. Now he was paying for it…literally.

  Deciding that now wasn’t the best time to think about the damage to the hotel that he was going to have to pay for, the speeding tickets that were going to clean out his checking account, the clothes that he was going to have to replace and the new truck that he was most likely going to have to buy and couldn’t afford, he walked over to his wife and picked her up.

  “Umm, what are you doing?” she asked even as she wrapped her arm around his shoulders.

  “Bringing you home.”

  “And you need to run in order to do this?” she asked, tightening her hold on him as she licked her lips nervously.

  “Yes,” he said, praying that he was able to get her home and end this honeymoon before anything else could go wro-

  “My glasses!” Haley cried when her glasses suddenly slipped off her face and fell. She tried to grab them, but she only managed to hit them, sending them flying.

  “Shit!” he snapped, slowing down so that he could-

  Crunch.

  “Fucking perfect,” he said, dropping his head back as he closed his eyes in defeat, because honestly, he wasn’t sure how much more he could take.

  “I-I don’t think they can be fixed,” Haley whispered softly.

  “Can you see them?” he stupidly asked even though he already knew that she couldn’t see a damn thing without them.

  “Well, no, but that crunch didn’t exactly sound promising,” she murmured thoughtfully as he forced himself to open his eyes and look down.

  “Please tell me that you have another pair,” he muttered, feeling his stomach twist in dread when he spotted the remains of her glasses scattered around his foot.

  “I do,” she said, making him sigh with relief, because finally, something was going his way. That is until she added, “But Grandma had them packed for me.”

  “Great,” he said, deciding that it was time to move his ass and get her home so that he could end this horrible nightmare, he started running again.

  “Why are we running exactly?” she asked, grabbing onto his shirt and holding on tightly as he ran as fast as he dared with her in his arms.

  “The curse,” he reluctantly muttered right around the time that he heard that vicious snarl breaking up the otherwise quiet morning.

  *-*-*-*

  “Ow!”

  “Put me down,” she said, trying to worm her way out of his arms, but the stubborn jerk refused to stop.

  “No,” he bit out with a determined glint in his eyes that was a little disturbing.

  “You’re limping,” she pointed out, again. Although, at this point she wasn’t sure that limping fit anymore, not when it appeared as though he was now dragging his right leg behind him.

  “It’s fine,” he gritted out between a clenched jaw as he continued his excruciatingly slow pace towards home.

  “I can walk,” she argued, pretty sure that she could at least walk better than him at this point.

  “No, I’m taking you home,” he argued, which wasn’t exactly surprising.

  Sighing, she shifted in his arms as they slowly turned the corner onto their street. “Why don’t you put me down so that we can take a look at your leg?”