The driver took in my things and handed them over to the assistant director, who met us at the door and then showed me to my dressing room. It was a surprisingly interesting room, styled like a Californian log cabin, complete with a fake fire and Adirondack chairs. There was a lounge covered in a Native American pattern fabric. A table filled with fresh fruit, chips, lollies and an assortment of drinks sat in the centre of the room. In the far corner there was a Hollywood style vanity table with lights all the way around the mirror. We dropped everything, except the guitar, and the assistant director took me straight to sound check.
She introduced me to a few people: the guy setting up the lights and the guy setting up the sound for the performance. Manny had already arranged everything. It was supposed to be very simple. Few lights. Just me and my guitar. There were about 10 people milling around, getting everything ready.
I took the spot in front of the mic. They flipped a switch and I was under a number of spotlights. I played a few chords, it was still in tune. The sound guy set up another mic at the right height for the guitar.
“When you’re ready, hon,” a voice said from the darkness. My eyes adjusted to see it was a woman standing at a podium beside the seats. I cleared my throat. The sound echoed around the room.
My fingers shook as they hovered over the strings. I started playing. I imagined the audience in all those empty chairs and I couldn’t look up. I started singing. My voice was shaky. I could hear people moving around quietly around me. I couldn’t pretend I was alone. I pushed through the song and told myself I could do it again with a hundred times more people. I finished and they all clapped. There was a wooing coming from behind me. I turned to see Laurie had been watching, a proud smile on his face. I didn’t believe it.
* * *
I took a few deep breaths and changed into my outfit. It was a simple pale grey Rodarte dress with a strapless bodice to the waist and a tulle skirt. It was almost like a prom dress. Ari had paired it with silver pointed strappy stilettos and two silver necklaces, one with a bar pendant and the other with a simple ring pendant.
I sat waiting for everyone and started to hear lively conversation happening just outside my door. I opened it up and the hair and makeup ladies were chatting to Laurie. He was making them laugh wildly.
“Sorry to interrupt,” I said, smiling at them all.
“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry,” one of the women said, as everyone came inside. We made our introductions and they rushed me into the vanity chair.
“It’s fine,” I insisted. Laurie went straight to the goods on the table as the ladies got me ready.
Jimmy came to visit me before sound check and was shocked to find Laurie in there with me. “What are you doing here? Is there something I don’t know?” he asked, amused.
“We’re good mates,” Laurie explained with a smile.
“Why don’t I believe you?” Jimmy said, putting on a British accent.
“Talia Shaw,” I said, introducing myself. “It’s really nice to meet you.”
“Nice to meet you,” Jimmy said, putting on his version of the Australian accent which sounded very similar to his British accent. “How are you feeling?” he asked.
“Nervous,” I said honestly.
“I love those two songs, Talia. I’m excited for this album,” he said with energy. He was just the way he was on television. It was nice to know it wasn’t put on.
“Thank you,” I responded.
“I’ll see you out there.”
He left and, soon after, the show started. The ladies finished me off, with winged eyes and red lips. I stood up. Laurie looked me over appreciatively and whistled. His eyes stopped at my chest. “What?” I asked.
He started to take off a necklace from his own neck. My necklace. “What are you doing?”
“You should wear it,” he said, as he stood up and put it on me. “Goes well.”
It did. I rubbed it a little, feeling a little safer. I sat back down with him. Then it was just about waiting.
The hair and makeup ladies were watching the show with Laurie, finding the monologue hilarious. I couldn’t follow along with what was on the screen. I played the song over in my head. I told myself it would be quick. No more than four minutes and I’d be done.
The same assistant director knocked on the door and told us it was time. Laurie stood up. “Ready to go?” he asked me.
I stood up and looked at him. I was going to fail. I was going to sing terribly. Or they’d all hate the song. Or I’d get up there and realise I didn’t belong there at all and just freeze. I couldn’t breathe. “I can’t do it.”
He shook his head, moving closer to me, putting his hands on my cheeks. “You can.”
The hair and makeup ladies were quiet, listening. I lowered my voice. “I can’t. Please don’t make me.” I grabbed at his forearms, my head shaking.
Laurie shook his head back at me, rubbing his thumbs in small circles against my cheeks. “I’m not making you. I know you can do it. You did it just a couple of hours ago. You were incredible.”
“Please,” I begged. I had no idea how I could get out of it, but I needed to.
I saw his adam’s apple bob as he swallowed. He looked at the assistant director who was looking nervously between us. “Can I go on with her?” he asked.
She opened her mouth, looking like she had no idea. “What do you mean?” I asked, confused.
“I’ll sing it with you,” he offered.
I felt immediate relief. “You will?”
“If you want me to,” he nodded.
“Do you know it?” I asked, shocked. I could do it with someone beside me. With Laurie beside me.
“I think so, I’ve listened to it enough,” he answered.
She spoke into her walkie. “Set up another mic beside Talia’s, Laurie Siler will be performing with her.”
“Oh my god.” I smiled at him, so grateful.
“You have five minutes,” she said to us as she left.
“How do I look?” he asked. We looked down at his jeans and button down, his usual Chelsea boots. “It’ll have to do.”
I shook my head. It didn’t matter what he wore. He always looked incredible.
“How are we going to do this?” he asked. He meant the song.
I remembered how Teddy and I used to play it. I didn’t have time to tell him how grateful I was. We just talked it through. How we’d break it down. What we’d sing together and apart. He did know the song, perfectly.
He held my shaky hands as we walked from the dressing room to the stage.
“Alright. Performing ‘Sails’ off her self-titled new album, Talia Shaw!” The band played the intro music and Laurie and I walked onto the stage. “Oh my god. And, she’s joined by Laurie Siler,” Jimmy continued, laughing. The audience roared.
Laurie smiled and waved. I smiled, too, knowing the screams were mostly for him. He was glowing beneath the light. He had all of that rock star energy. He belonged up there. I felt like a joke beside him. I picked up my guitar. Laurie considered for a second and then rushed over to the band. “Can I borrow that, mate?” he asked the guitarist. The guitarist happily handed it over. Laurie came back and stood beside me. I could hear him breathing beneath the screams of the audience.
I couldn’t look up. Laurie could see it. “Look at me,” he said, quietly. So, I did. And he looked at me. We started playing. The roars got louder for a few seconds and then quieted down as we started to sing. When we got to bridge, Laurie looked away and looked out at the audience. He gave that signature smile and the young girls screamed. It made me smile. And then I was looking out at the audience, too. They weren’t so scary.
Laurie played with my song. His husky lower register wrapped around the lyrics and they become something different. I was glad this moment was being recorded. I wanted to be able to watch it back and listen to us together. Our voices complimented each other and the song. I don’t know when he learned it on the guitar, but he played it e
ffortlessly and gave it a little more edge than it had before.
We were coming to the end. Laurie held my gaze and wouldn’t let go. We sang together until the very last moment when he left me alone. My voice finished the song.
The salt or the words on the page
Maybe sunshine or liquid courage
A melody in the air
But I, I can breathe here
I can be here, yeah
I can be here
I can
Jimmy stood at his desk, clapping wildly. “Yeah!” he said, cheering. The band was clapping genuinely for us. The crowd stood, clapping and smiling at us. The young girls in the crowd screamed out for us both.
I got through it. More than that, I loved it. Because of him. If I could do it with him then I could do it on my own. He helped me get there. He clapped, gesturing to me, giving me credit. I shook my head and gave it back to him. The audience laughed a little. Jimmy ran over to us, wrapping an arm around each of us. He held my album, in vinyl, in his hands. “The album is out next week, November 1st. Give it up for Talia Shaw and Laurie Siler!”
* * *
We went straight from the show to meet his friends in New York. On the ground floor of the Bowery was an Italian restaurant named Gemma. It was all lit up with candles and chandeliers and filled with lively people. Music played loudly amongst the chatter. Laurie held my hand as we walked to a corner booth where a group of people sat. They were an eclectic bunch. There was a young couple, an older guy wearing a chef’s uniform, the Asian guy who let Teddy and me into the apartment for that first party and an Oscar winning actress who I’d seen very recently in a superhero movie.
“Everyone, this is Talia Shaw,” Laurie introduced me.
“Hi,” I said with half a wave as we sat down.
“Talia, this is Rhys and Keelin.” The couple. “Bucky, best chef in New York City, Jeremy and Marley.”
“Nice to meet you all,” I said. I turned to Jeremy. “I remember you from Laurie’s party.”
He nodded. “I remember. I work for Laurie, but he doesn’t like people to know. He wants to be the type with no entourage.”
I laughed. “What do you do for him?”
“Jack shit,” Laurie answered.
The group laughed and Jeremy shook his head. “I look after his calendar and the house when he’s touring.”
“I see. So, you’re a house sitter,” I said, jumping on the bandwagon. The group laughed.
“Are we ordering? What’s the deal?” Laurie asked.
Bucky stood up, “I got it covered.” He went back to the kitchen.
“You want a drink?” Laurie asked me.
“Whatever you’re having,” I said. Rhys got up and went with him to the bar. Keelin took his seat closer to me.
“You are gorgeous,” she said.
“I just came from a thing. I don’t usually look like this,” I explained.
“I love your song, Bettys. So moving. And that music video was incredible,” Marley said from across the table.
“Thank you,” I said. “I am a big fan of your work, too.”
“Thanks,” she said, rolling her eyes back. She didn’t seem proud. “I have been stuck in a few dud contracts, but I’ve got some good projects coming up.”
I smiled at her. “What do you do?” I asked Keelin.
“I am a designer. Handbags and sunglasses at the moment,” she said and looked at the pale pink clutch she had dragged with her to this seat.
“Did you design this?” I asked, touching the leather.
“I did,” she answered. She looked at my dress. “You match.”
She started taking her things out of the bag. “It’s lovely,” I said.
She handed it over. “It’s yours,” she said.
I didn’t take it. “I couldn’t.”
“Go on,” Marley said. “It’ll be good for her business.”
I furrowed my brow. “Don’t judge me,” Keelin continued. “It’s been a slow season.”
I took it from her, feeling like I couldn’t say no. “Okay. Sure.”
I had my phone, complete with case and cards in my coat pocket. I transferred everything into the bag.
“Don’t you dare call the paps,” Marley threatened Keelin.
Keelin rolled her eyes. The boys came back with two trays of drinks and handed them out. There were enough for several drinks each. “What are these for?” I asked.
“We’re celebrating,” he said, as he forced my drink up to my mouth. We sculled together. He put his hand on my knee. I put my hand over his and leaned in to his side. Neither of us seemed to want to let the other go.
Bucky came back with a couple of waiters delivering pizza and pasta and salads, all of it smelling delectable.
We ate and drank and talked. They all started telling me stories of Laurie, how Laurie had come to the US when he was only seventeen and made quite an impact. I heard stories of the women he had dated, many of them older. It seemed to be a habit of his, even if I didn’t fall into that category.
Bucky had met Laurie after Laurie ended up drunk in Bucky’s small struggling restaurant outside New Orleans. They became friends and Laurie convinced Anna Wintour to have Bucky cook for one of her dinner parties and his career was made.
Rhys, an architect, met Laurie through Keelin. Keelin met Laurie through one of his ex-girlfriends. I asked Marley how she and Laurie had met. “I can’t even remember,” she said. She and Laurie shared a look and I guessed there was something they weren’t saying. They had probably been in a relationship and stayed friends. I would’ve preferred to know the truth, but it didn’t bother me. She told a story about Laurie, on a day off, buying groceries and driving around Los Angeles, delivering them to the homeless.
Laurie became red as she talked about it. “It wasn’t good enough. It’s really awful how many people are living on the streets in that city.”
He sounded like he genuinely cared, and his friends took him seriously. I couldn’t help myself as I leaned in and pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth. His goodness was undeniable. He looked at me as I pulled away, deeply, with something unsaid on his lips.
A waiter approached Bucky and spoke quietly in his ear. Bucky looked at us all, and asked, “dessert?”
It was already nearly midnight. I looked back at Laurie. He was still looking at me. He smiled at the group and answered, “I think we’re gonna have an early one.”
The group laughed and teased us as we left. The streets were reasonably quiet. Not a camera in sight. We told our driver that he could leave us for the night and took a walk through Central Park on the way back to the hotel. Laurie held my hand and then wrapped his arm around me to keep me warm. We passed by a few people, but the darkness kept us hidden. It was like we were just any couple wandering around in a red wine haze.
We got back to the hotel around 1am. We took off our coats and shoes. I sat on the bed and yawned into my hand. “You’re tired?” Laurie asked.
“Not at all,” I lied. He laughed at me. He pulled me into his arms and held me tightly. I tried to pull away. I needed to wash my face and brush my teeth, but he wouldn’t let me go. He was tired, too.
“Tonight was a good night,” he whispered.
“Thank you,” I said to him.
I felt him press a kiss into my hair.
We fell asleep wrapped up in each other.
We stayed in bed the whole next day. Laurie kept suggesting places for us to go and things for us to see but I didn’t want to do any of that more than I wanted to stay in that bed with him.
Laurie went to put our breakfast room service trolley out into the hall. He came back into the bedroom with my guitar. “Do you mind?” he asked.
“Not at all,” I answered. He sat at the end of the bed and started playing.
“You know, Teddy sent me a video of you… you were playing my song. You were so good. You made it sound ten times better.”
“No, I didn’t,” I blushed. “I ca
n’t believe he sent you that.” The recording he took on the cruise ship. I hadn’t known he was recording until after I’d stopped singing. I couldn’t believe he’d sent it to Laurie. I couldn’t imagine what I must have looked or sounded like.
“You were so sexy,” he said, starting to play. Laurie played bits and pieces of different songs, tunes he’d made up.
“Play me one of your songs,” I said.
“Which one?” he responded.
“Whichever,” I said. I loved them all.
He started playing a song I didn’t immediately recognise. It was slow and romantic. I tried to remember it as he played. That’s when it hit me.
“That’s not your song,” I said. It belonged to a country band. I couldn’t recall their name. It was sung by a woman.
“Yes it is,” he said, smiling.
“No,” I said, shaking my head. I knew that song.
“I wrote it,” he said, simply. My mouth dropped open. He stopped playing. “What?”
“I didn’t know you wrote for anyone else,” I said, shocked.
“Sometimes I do.”
“Who else have you written for?” He rattled off a list. Bands, singers, and people I never would’ve guessed. Huge names and hit songs.
“Why don’t I know about this?”
“I don’t use my name. Makes things simpler,” he explained.
I groaned. “You’re so talented. It kills me,” I said, dropping back on the bed.
“Shut up,” he said, throwing a pillow at me.
His phone beeped and he went to check it.
“I need to book my flight back. What time is yours?” he asked.
“10,” I answered. “I’m dreading it.”
He looked at me questioningly.
“The flight over was awful. It was the first time I’ve flown since the accident.”
He nodded, understanding. He thought for a moment.
“You know I’ve always wanted to drive across the country. I’ve toured around it but never got to really experience it.”
Bright Lights: Book One of the Talia Shaw Series Page 12