by Nicola Shill
‘You know, Cassandra, maybe your family has gotten over your disappearance and moved on.’ He dropped her hand as if he’d just discovered it was diseased. ‘Maybe you should, too.’
Cassandra turned around to face him, but he’d disappeared. She changed her impression of him from pirate to vampire as a frigid shiver trickled down her spine.
It took Cassandra even longer than usual to fall asleep that night. The confrontation with Lorcan had shaken her up, as she was sure had been his purpose. What had rattled her the most was his comment at the end. Of course, she didn’t believe her family had given up on her. Lorcan didn’t have any idea what he was talking about; she knew that logically. But as hard as she tried to hold the positive picture of her three dearest loved ones – Dad, Grandma and Emma – in her mind’s eye, Sylvia kept strutting in and shattering the picture. She felt guilty to admit that the seed of doubt Lorcan had planted was sprouting like a weed in her garden of beautiful memories. It scared her: was this how giving up began? She desperately tried to erase Lorcan’s dreadful words from her mind. She could not lose hope. She feared that, if she did, she would never see her home again. So she lay awake, fighting the doubt of her father’s love, blaming and hating Lorcan for putting it there, but knowing secretly that the reason it was troubling her so much was that it had already been there before she had ever come to this place.
Eventually, blessed exhaustion claimed her.
— CHAPTER 27 —
Gorgeous Psychopath
The next morning, Cassandra came down for breakfast fatigued and moody.
As usual, Brack and Chayton had gone for the day and Oonnora and Tani were sitting across the table from each other, eating bread and jam. Cassandra sat down beside Oonnora and helped herself. This was one thing she would miss when she left.
While Cassandra ate, she told them about her run-in with Lorcan.
Oonnora frowned throughout most of the story, but when Cassandra finished, she schooled her face into a calm mask. ‘Don’t worry about him,’ she advised. ‘He’s a bit … intense. But he’s very good at what he does: very conscientious and thorough.’
‘That’s what I was afraid of,’ muttered Cassandra.
‘He really is very nice. All the girls love him, don’t they Tani?’
Tani nodded enthusiastically. She swallowed prematurely and winced as the lump forced its way down her oesophagus.
‘Why?’ asked Cassandra.
Tani and Oonnora stared at Cassandra as if they hadn’t understood the question.
‘How could anyone like, let alone love, a thug like him?’
‘I think you’re talking about Chayton,’ muttered Tani.
Oonnora burst into laughter. ‘Lorcan a thug?’
‘He’s gorgeous,’ breathed Tani.
Well, that was true. Lorcan was impossibly, darkly handsome, but still … ‘He’s a psychopath!’
‘Hardly that,’ said Oonnora.
‘What’s a psychopath?’ asked Tani.
‘He threatened to kill me.’
‘Did he?’ Oonnora was looking so concerned now that Cassandra felt bad for exaggerating, although she wasn’t sure if she was or not. Hadn’t he said he was going to ‘neutralise’ her?
‘I don’t know.’
The room went silent while everyone was lost in their own thoughts.
‘Why have I never seen him around?’ asked Cassandra. ‘If he’s so popular.’
‘He works all the time,’ said Tani. ‘He never comes to the revelry.’
‘Mmmm, sometimes though, I think that’s a front,’ said Oonnora thoughtfully.
‘What do you mean?’ asked Tani.
‘Well, he doesn’t have to. Nobody has to work that hard. I think it suits him to do it. It allows him to avoid the revelry and other social gatherings.’
This didn’t mesh with what Brack had told Cassandra when he’d shown her around Gillwillan. ‘But Brack told me fae are obsessed with socialising.’
Tani rolled her eyes.
‘That’s a bit of an exaggeration,’ said Oonnora, ‘but close enough to the truth. Lorcan’s different, though. Over time he’s withdrawn more and more. I think he’s become a bit … jaded by it all.’
‘If he’s so gorgeous, why would he want to withdraw from social gatherings?’ asked Cassandra. ‘Is he socially inept?’ That’s it, Cassandra realised. He doesn’t know how to make friends. He had certainly demonstrated that to her.
Oonnora laughed again. ‘Definitely not. He’s extremely charismatic. He’s a master of social graces. Girls swarm to him like …’ she waved a hand around.
‘Flies?’ offered Cassandra.
‘Butterflies to nectar.’
‘Who would ever become jaded by that?’ asked Tani.
‘I think that’s just it,’ answered Oonnora. ‘It was probably flattering at first, but don’t you think there’d be a point at which it would become empty and lonely?’
Tani and Cassandra shook their heads. How could popularity ever become lonely?
‘Well, of course it would,’ Oonnora insisted. ‘Girls take one look at Lorcan and, don’t ask me why, but they equate his good looks with a party boy, and for a while there, he acted that out. After his parents disappeared, I think he struggled to redefine himself. Losing them robbed him of the last years of his childhood, yet he wasn’t ready for adulthood. I suppose it seemed easier to him to just be the party boy everyone expected him to be. But Lorcan is exactly the opposite: the one thing missing from his life, the thing he wants most of all, is family. He’s not interested in superficial or short-term relationships; he wants permanence, commitment and, most of all, love. He wants a partner, not a date.’
Cassandra couldn’t decide whether to hate Lorcan or feel sorry for him. Maybe both. She didn’t know the story of his parent’s disappearance, but she was sure it wouldn’t be a happy one. She looked at Tani. Tani was actually becoming teary.
‘Just imagine,’ Oonnora continued, ‘you meet a girl, you like her, she seems to like you, you try to get a relationship going and, suddenly, she’s turning cold because you’re not as much fun as she thought you were. The moment there was even a hint of that, Lorcan would always walk away – no second chances. How many non-starters would you need before you decided it would be less painful to simply avoid boy-meets-girl situations entirely? At least when he works, he’s valued for his skills rather than his appearance.’
It did sound a bit sad to Cassandra, but it also reinforced her perception of him as implacable and intolerant.
‘But he must have friends – you know, who really like him … deep down.’
‘There are only a handful of people who genuinely know Lorcan. Mostly, they’re older adults who aren’t taken in by his appearance and charm. I suppose I’m one, to a degree, and Eerin and Fil, although they’re more like parents than friends. Eerin thought he was going to be her apprentice for a while there. He certainly had the talent for it.’ A faraway look passed across Oonnora’s face as if she was remembering times long past, but then she seemed to shake herself out of it and gave a short laugh. ‘Eerin keeps his feet planted on the ground. She treats him more as a recalcitrant child than a superstar.’
Tani added, ‘Garris is his best friend.’
‘Yes,’ agreed Oonnora as she stood up and started to clear dishes away. ‘He has Garris. Garris is a good friend.’ She stopped and looked at Cassandra. ‘Should I ask him to leave you alone?’
Cassandra would have liked Oonnora’s protection, but she didn’t want Lorcan to know she was worrying about him. ‘Ahhh, no. Not yet, thanks. Maybe if you just mention in passing how much you like me … alive.’
Oonnora laughed.
Cassandra didn’t think she was taking this as seriously as she should.
— CHAPTER 28 —
The Cetchet Game
That night, Cassandra attended her first cetchet game.
As she sat sleepily beside Oonnora and Brack, waiting for the game to start,
she scanned the other spectators and the players to see how many she recognised. Her gaze swept over faces and was abruptly jolted to a halt as if by a physical force. She found herself staring into dark eyes that she would never forget as long as she lived. Their intensity shocked her again. A second later, Lorcan turned away and took his place in the centre of the court, ignoring her stare.
Cassandra felt burnt. She was reeling from that impact when another, more welcome, impact assailed her from behind. The giggling in her ear told her without looking that Gita had attached herself like an octopus to her back. She twisted around to drag the fluttering child on to her knee, grateful for the distraction. Gita’s parents and Treus set up camp beside Brack and Oonnora, while Gita wiggled down into Cassandra’s lap. Cassandra felt comfortable with Gita’s parents. They were two of only a handful of adults who were genuinely friendly to Cassandra. They didn’t seek her out to talk to, but when their paths crossed, they took the time for short, genuine conversations. Cassandra assumed it was because of her friendship with their children. Regardless of the reason, she was glad for every ally she could attract.
But the fifth member of the family who arrived with them balanced out the sweetness of the other four. Cassandra had met him only once before, when he’d rescued her from the cat, and clearly time had not quenched his anger. He was scowling at her now with the same hatred as he had then. He didn’t sit down beside his parents as Treus had but continued to walk out on to the agora.
‘Is that your brother?’ Cassandra quietly asked Gita.
‘Yes! That’s Garris,’ Gita shouted exuberantly and bounced up and down. The object of her adoration turned around and took the opportunity to pierce Cassandra once more with his resentful stare. Cassandra quickly averted her eyes and pretended to be fussing with Gita’s dress, although it must have been obvious that any such effort was wasted because Gita was, as usual, a blur of motion. Cassandra recognised the name: this was Lorcan’s best friend. What a shame he had to be part of Treus and Gita’s lovely family.
The players were milling around on the agora, starting to take positions, when Chayton flew out of the sky into the middle of it all. He pulled off his shirt and threw it over on to the ground between Cassandra and Oonnora. No one could deny that he was beautiful. But now Cassandra saw his beauty for what it was: pretty wrapping, nothing more.
Tani played on the same team as Lorcan. Garris played on the opposing team with Chayton. Flaming torches atop long poles gave the playing field a loose definition, but the game often moved outside this area, sometimes with hilarious results. At each end of the playing area were six stiff ti-tree leaves stuck stalk end into the ground. These were the goals. The aim of the game was to knock all six of the opposing team’s goals over with the ball, which was a hard ti-tree nut. The game had a fast paced, jerky sort of rhythm. Flying was allowed, but at least one foot had to be on the ground while catching and holding the ball. Body contact was illegal, as was running with the ball. These few rules seemed to be all. If any were broken, the ball was passed to the nearest opposition player in an entirely voluntary, good-natured manner. It resembled a mix of netball and ten-pin, or rather, six-pin, bowling. There was no time limit on the game: it went on for as long or little time as required, with a short break after each goal. The rule of thumb was that if you weren’t very good at the sport itself, then comedy was the next best option.
Garris combined both skill and comedy. Lorcan was hugely skilled but was so focused that he seemed to occasionally forget that it was only a game. Tani was fast, tactical and cheeky. Chayton was undoubtedly a skilled athlete and, playing topless, was great to look at too, but now Cassandra noticed how much of a show-off he was, how his eyes sought out the girls among the spectators whenever he did something impressive. He flew a lap of honour around the field whenever his team scored a goal. What a peacock. What had she ever seen in him?
Overall, the game made for extremely good viewing. Even Gita, whose attention was impossible to maintain for long, sat still and watched for a good ten minutes before she began to entertain herself by torturing Cassandra. The diaphanous layers of Gita’s dress and her fluttering wings made an effective screen to block Cassandra’s view at crucial moments.
Eventually, Gita wore herself out and settled back down in Cassandra’s lap, reaching up sleepily to twirl Cassandra’s hair around her tiny fingers. Cassandra wrapped her arms lovingly around Gita and returned her focus to the game.
Watching Lorcan play was like watching a lion playing with kittens. He was energetic and competitive, but his large size meant that he continually had to pull himself up short. The fact that he could even do that was testament to his agility and balance. His big feet were constantly courting danger. Cassandra watched him sprint for the ball. It was caught by a petite girl on the opposing team. Lorcan had to stop suddenly to avoid knocking her down and teetered precariously over her for a few seconds while he gained control of his momentum without making contact with her. His huge, dragon-like wings – black and mottled silver lace stretched over a mighty framework – shot out for balance and nearby players were forced to leap out of the way to avoid being hit by them. The girl looked a little disappointed when Lorcan succeeded in not collapsing on top of her.
On the other hand, Lorcan’s size gave him huge advantages that far outweighed the disadvantages. He could easily catch the ball above the reach of other players with one hand, into which it virtually disappeared. His size and speed made him a frightening opponent, and he would often gain possession of the ball purely because other competitors fled when they saw him coming. He also had incredible stamina which allowed him to outlast most other players.
Garris was built with less bulk and more sinew than Lorcan. His wings were identical to Treus’s beetle wings. They made him much faster in the air than Lorcan for short distances and changes in direction; ‘zippy’ was the word that sprang to Cassandra’s mind. He also appeared to be one of the few players who had no fear of Lorcan. While Lorcan was busy trying to stop, Garris would dart around or swoop under him and gain possession of the ball. Garris was fun to watch too, because he was a natural wag, injecting humour whenever possible, often using Lorcan as his dupe. He was such a nuisance to Lorcan throughout the game that, even though she’d been told they were friends, Cassandra was surprised to see the two of them walking off the field together during a break, joking and jostling. She had to admit that when Lorcan smiled, it transformed his entire persona from demon to angel.
The game ended after a couple of hours with a narrow victory to Garris and Chayton’s team. Chayton flew three laps of honour, low and fast, and landed across the other side of the field with his friends. Some had been spectating, others had been playing. He didn’t even bother to come over and collect his shirt but stood proudly topless with sweat glistening on his skin. Cassandra remembered the first night when she’d wanted to stroke his sweat-slicked chest. The thought made her nauseous now.
Best to fix her mind on something else before her weak stomach embarrassed her yet again.
She averted her gaze and found Lorcan and Garris heading straight for her. Watching them approach stroked icy fingers of dread up and down her spine. She refused to let either of them see her fear, so she stiffened her back and raised her chin slightly. The effect was ruined when Gita, sensing that the game was over, awoke and stepped painfully on Cassandra’s shin in her rush to leap up and flutter into the air in front of Garris’s nose. Cassandra understood why Gita worshipped Garris as she watched him pluck her out of the air and tuck her protectively into his arms, speaking to her as if she was the most interesting person in the world.
Brack, unfortunately, had not yet been filled in about Cassandra’s run-in with Lorcan last night. He assumed responsibility for the introductions: ‘Lorcan, this is Cassandra, she’s …’
‘Yes, we met last night,’ Lorcan said. ‘I’m afraid I was perhaps a bit hard on her.’ He pierced her with a stare that did not look at all conciliatory.
‘I tend to be quite suspicious of humans.’
Perhaps? Perhaps a bit hard on her? Cassandra raised her eyebrows at him. She was fabulously brave.
‘Err … yes. Look, Lorcan …,’ Oonnora began.
‘It’s all right. I’ve discussed it with Eerin and done some checking. We’re prepared to accept her accident story …,’ he said ‘story’ as if he had wanted to say ‘lie’, ‘for now. So maybe we should start again?’
Cassandra didn’t feel ready to forgive Lorcan. She felt justified holding on to her anger and outrage a bit longer. But Lorcan didn’t seem particularly concerned about whether she forgave him or not. He didn’t even sound convinced of her innocence. Now, when she thought about it, he hadn’t requested forgiveness or even apologised, the rotten bully. On the other hand, Cassandra had already worked out that he was one fairy you didn’t want to be on the wrong side of if you could possibly avoid it. She decided, somewhat reluctantly, to accept the offer before it was withdrawn. She nodded stiffly.
‘Good,’ he said, and held out his hand. Cassandra knew from her experiences with Brack and with Rozad that the fae didn’t shake hands. What was he doing? She glanced from his hand up into his face. He rolled his eyes, reached forward, picked up her limp hand, shook it twice, and dropped it. ‘I’ll see you at the revelry tomorrow night.’
And, with that, Mr. Arrogant Rat-Bastard strutted away.
— CHAPTER 29 —
Intimidation and Revelation
Cassandra was disgusted to find herself worrying about her appearance for the revelry the next night.
I do not care what Lorcan thinks of me, she lectured herself while she examined the row of dresses that Oonnora had provided for her in her wardrobe. I hate him intensely, she reminded herself as she pulled out a shimmery blue dress and held it up in the mirror. I do not need his approval, she berated herself, replacing the blue dress and flicking through her other dresses.
She grabbed the dress that Iznaya had knitted for her and began to pull it on. It was a completely random choice. It was not because of the beautiful way the lacy, floaty fabric fell in irregular wisps making it look both angelic and sexy at the same time. It was not because the spider’s web seemed to absorb the colours of its surroundings and complement whatever complexion it was attached to. It was definitely not because of the way the bodice clung and accentuated her curves while camouflaging imperfections – though there were less of those since she’d been eating berries, bread and fungus. She looked at herself in the mirror. It would be a wasteful extravagance not to make an effort with the rest of her appearance if she wore this dress. Worse, it would be disrespectful to Iznaya. She went in search of Tani to help her.