Players had gradually spread out and explored most of the lands in NEO, taming the wilderness, establishing settlements and trade routes. I was currently in a remote, untamed and unexplored part of the world. There’d been some attempts in the past to explore the Deadlands. A few expeditions were sent to scout it. But the difficulty reaching it, coupled with inhospitable conditions and high monster populations, made it an undesired location. Some conspiracy buffs even argued the area was deliberately made to keep players out, that it hid something.
“Crap!” I cried out loud in frustration. My voice reverberated in the cave, the echoes multiplying my shout into a crescendo.
How the hell, am I supposed to get home! I fumed. Could this shit get any worse!?”
As if to answer my question, I heard chattering from the tunnel. I looked at the entrance. A small party of spear-wielding goblins was marching through it, looking agitated and aggressive.
“Figures,” I sighed.
A system message popped up.
“What the hell?” I mumbled.
You’ve learned a new Skill: Murphy's Bitch (*) [passive, monster race]
Through your ability to reach the absolute emotional bottom, and then will into existence an even unlikelier bottom, Murphy's law now works slightly to your advantage!
Current level 1: Novice.
Effect I: 1% higher chance of murphy’s law working in your favor.
Effect II: 1% higher chance of Murphy’s law working against your opposition.
Prime badge: As the first player to unlock this skill you gain 50% increased rate and can teach it to others
My mouth was hanging open in astonishment. And for what felt like the hundredth time today, I murmured: “What the hell!?“
Skills acquisition in NEO worked differently than other games. There were no predefined skills, abilities, or even classes in NEO. Instead, when a character performed an unconventional action or effort that was within a varying and unknown set of parameters, a skill might be created and awarded by the game in response. After swinging an axe at a tree for a while, with poor results, a system notification would appear, saying: “Congratulation! Due to your repeated efforts you have gained the following skill: Lumberjack level 1.”
Sounds easy, right? Far from it.
There are a couple tricky things about skills. The first is advancing a skill to a level they become truly useful or powerful, the other is getting the skill in the first place. Sure, how to get a physical skill wasn’t especially mysterious, just keep performing the same physical action under the right conditions, and voila! But magic was different, a Magic spell couldn’t be practiced if the spell wasn’t known already. So learning magic by just repeating an action over and over until it became a skill was not feasible.
There were countless easily obtained skills, for example the already mentioned lumberjack skill, and many others such as swordsmanship, blacksmithing, fishing, hunting, skinning, and painting, to name just a few. I once knew a girl who had ‘flower picking level 52,’ simply because she loved flowers so much, and gathered them every chance she got.
And now, the game engine just granted me the weirdest skill I’ve ever heard of.
Something else was strange. It was highly unlikely that I was the first player to have been in a situation suitable for being ‘gifted’ with ‘Murphy's Bitch.’ So how was it possible that I had gotten the Prime badge in it?
Hmm…the monster-race descriptor in the notification might have something to do with it. Maybe it meant only monster races can have this skill.
I sighed. That would mean I couldn’t teach Murphy’s Bitch to other players, so I won’t be able to capitalize on it.
The group of goblins, led by a big warrior, closed the distance between us, brandishing bone-tipped spears at me. The common warriors wore leather armor in desperate need of cleaning and the care of a good armorer. I closely examined the big goblin at the front. He wore a better set of leather armor, and was armed with a short metal sword and a small wooden shield. A dagger was tucked into his worn looking belt. He was at least a head taller than the other warrior goblins and much more muscular. He moved confidently between his men toward me, his eyes sizing me up. Suddenly a second’s system message appeared. What the hell?
You’ve learned a new Skill: Analyze (M) [active, monster race]
Through careful observation and thorough study, you are able to discern hidden details of the world around you. Progress in this skill will provide more details, and eventually magical properties will be identifiable!
Current level 1: Novice.
Effect: you can see a creature’s name, health, and level. Other details about the creature might be revealed depending on the skill’s level, and the levels of the target.
Range: 11 meters
My eyes opened in astonishment as I read the description. This was an incredibly useful skill! Usually players only saw the health bar and race of other creatures. Magic users could gain more information by using advanced magic in the form of divination spells. And I just got a free-to-use-no-limit skill that did, or would eventually do, the same thing as those mana and time intensive spells. Awesome!
It was damn lucky to acquire two skills in rapid succession. Maybe the all mighty Guy feels responsible for my current predicament, and is trying to compensate me for it...? I seriously doubted it. Still, my character was receiving some good boosts. At this rate, I’ll be the world’s most successful goblin, I chuckled.
Guy was omnipotent. Guy was all knowing. Guy was a cold uncaring piece of...code, which now seemed to be rewarding me with this never before heard of Analyze skill.
The goblins had closed the distance between us and were staring at me with open hostility.
I sighed. Just respawned, barely out of the womb so to speak, and I am already facing another death.
Come on you ugly bastards, bring it on! I thought fiercely and drew a pathetic bone dagger from my belt, an action that might have looked slightly more intimidating if I were wearing anything more than a loincloth.
The goblins advanced until their spear tips were nearly touching my skin. Then they froze as they saw the dagger in my hand. They began talking excitedly in their chittering language. I wasn’t really trying to listen, so I was shocked to realize I understood their goblin-speech!
“Looky, look! This weird one holding ceremonial dagger! Is maybe Totem?”
I looked at the dagger. I’d grabbed it without even thinking. It was just a crappy old bone dagger.
Where the hell did I get it from? I wrinkled my forehead in confusion.
Then, it all came rushing back to me, all the details that happened before I was killed. Betrayed, cursed, and the humiliation that followed.
This dagger was given to me as a final insult.
***
“I come with great news and tidings of joy, O’ mighty and powerful Arladen, Master of the Arcane.” Vatras intoned formally.
I crinkled my nose. “Come on man, we’ve been friends for years, you can just use my real name.”
“As you wish,” he gave a mocking bow. “Oh great and powerful Oren Berman, would you consent to grant me an audience?”
Something was off. Vatras was being facetious, of course, but there was a tone in his voice…disrespect? Mockery?
That was unusual; Vatras was usually a stickler for respect and proper etiquette.
I decided to ignore it, it could have just been my imagination.
“How much gold did that Dragon Behemoth raid bring in?” I asked. Not out of greed, really, or not just out of greed. The Dragon Behemoth was the highest level boss our guild had ever defeated, and I wanted to know how returns from bosses of differing levels compared.
“About half a million,” Vatras answered offhandedly. I sat back in my chair, grinning broadly. As Guild Master, I was entitled to 10% of the raid loot, including the gold. Which meant I was now 50,000 gold richer. That was about five grand in US dollars from one raid. Quite a lucrative
operation, and it only took a single day to complete it.
“What about the rest of the loot?” I pressed on. “Did it drop any artifacts?”
He smiled, it looked unpleasant somehow. This time, I definitely detected more than a hint of something off in his behavior. But I wasn’t too worried; this was MY guild, after all. I was the guild master, I had all the power.
“We did find some epic loot,” Vatras replied. “The most interesting was this scroll. Even for an Epic level item, this is pretty rare. A fitting gift for you, I think, in honor of the guild’s first anniversary. Here, take a look.”
He shared the properties of the scroll he was holding:
Spell Scroll: Race Change
Description: An old, crumbling parchment @#$#-----------Error!
Type: Single use item.
Rank: Epic-#999999.9999
Effect: Permanently change the target’s race to a monster ${mType:}#??$$##----Error!
I let out a soft whistle. I had heard about these scrolls. Only a handful of them has ever been found. Every prominent NPC in the game had an open bounty on them. The reward was high enough to sway even the wealthiest players. The scroll was indeed a very lucrative find, and was even rarer than Artifacts. The open bounty empowered NCP traders to buy the scrolls for a million gold! So it would be incredibly easy to sell off.
Despite their sale value, such scrolls had been used on player characters a few times. The victims were turned into a random monster race and were unable to continue playing, as monsters were only allowed as NPCs. The victim would have to delete the character and start a new one from scratch.
Seeing the weird code like fragments in the scroll description, I was pretty sure that the scroll was a game bug or glitch. After all, in the gaming world, it was unheard of, and undesirable for a player to have the power to permanently destroy another player’s character.
“That is a great find indeed Vatras!” I beamed at him. “What a nice anniversary present! We should sell it immediately. We can use the gold surplus to add another floor to the guild, and recruit even more members.” I’d been working on that very plan, but my available budget for guild improvements was relatively small.
Vatras had that weird smug grin on his face again, and didn’t reply to my suggestion. Instead, he held up his other hand, displaying the second item.
“What’s that?” I asked, “Another item from the boss?”
“No,” Vatras smiled unpleasantly. “This is an Artifact rank Imprisonment Pearl.”
I let out another low whistle. Imprisonment Pearls were powerful magical items. When invoked they formed a magical prison around a creature, and nullified all magic abilities. Escaping one was impossible. The higher the pearl’s rank, the higher the level creatures and spells it could suppress. Artifact rank meant that, short of a god, it could imprison any creature in the game world.
“Where did you find an artifact level one?” I exclaimed. Then I narrowed my eyes, something was definitely off here. Vatras was being disrespectful and deliberately evasive.
Vatras saw my growing suspicion and gave a full-blown malevolent smile. That was my only warning. I reached to activate one of my protection wards, but I was already too late. Vatras was ready for me.
He crushed the pearl and a blazing net of cascading colors appeared all around me. I was slowed and weakened as all the powerful items I wore became inactive.
“What the hell are you doing?” I shouted.
“I’ve had it with you!” He snarled at me, slowly circling my glowing cage. “For the last two years you’ve treated me like your errand boy. You sit comfortably, all high and mighty in your ivory tower, fat, lazy and full of yourself, while I do all the work.” He spat on the floor in disgust. “You’re just another stupid player who got lucky early in the game. You never really had to work hard, you didn’t earn anything on your own. Everything was just handed to you. I’ve busted my ass recruiting people, forging the guild into a weapon, and leading us from one victory to another. I’m the reason for the guild’s success, not you!”
Then in a more level tone added, “It is time for a change in leadership, Oren.”
His words outraged me. ‘Didn’t earn anything on my own!?’ I poured my heart and soul into the game! I quit my job, uprooted my life and he tells me I didn’t earn it!?
“HOW DARE YOU!”! I roared. I started pounding on the barrier with my fists, to no effect.
Vatras smiled as he watched me struggle. “Give it a rest Oren, you know better than that. At least have the decency to lose with dignity. What little dignity you still have. There’s no escaping, this is the end of the line for you, my old friend.”
“TRAITOR! SCUM!” I yelled at him. “I’m the reason people join the guild! Without my Prime spells, how will you get new members to join? You can’t function without me! Now. Let. Me. OUT!!!” I roared.
He smiled, completely at ease, despite my outburst. “You’re forgetting something, oh mighty Guild Master. I was the first person you taught most of your spells to. After you delete your insipid character, your Prime badges will transfer to the next in line.” He gave a small bow. “I will take good care of them, I promise.” He laughed raucously.
“GO TO HELL!” I yelled again in outrage. “You’ll never get away with that. The other guild members won’t stand for it!” I continued banging on the barrier.
His laughter intensified. “You really should have mingled more with your people instead of sitting on your throne all the time.” He looked toward the still open door, still amused, and called out “come on in, fellows.”
Bigpill and Hirooku were Vatras’ buds and personal minions, so I wasn’t surprised when they came in. But they were not the only ones. One by one, almost all of the other high-ranking officers, people I’d recruited personally and known for more than a year, came into the office. They all looked at me with stony faces, none of them surprised or concerned at my predicament.
“You see, Oren?” Vatras smirked at me, “These people despise you, they think you’re an elitist snob. Also, the rumors I’ve been spreading about you for months, undermining your position and sowing discontent, didn’t help with the lower ranks. And you were clueless! Everyone will be cheering me when they learn I got rid of you. And this scroll,” he waved the Race Change scroll he was holding, “will let me do just that.”
“You are crazy,” I said, trying to control my rage. “That scroll is worth as much as a brand-new car. You’re going to throw away all that money just to get rid of me?” I looked around at the stony-faced officers, trying to rally them to my support. “The guild will suffer from the loss of income Each of you will lose a significant bonus of your share.”
Vatras waved his hand dismissively. “The guild is worth much more than that, and you know it. You could, of course, show a bit of loyalty to the guild and just delete your character yourself, right now, and spare us wasting the scroll. The guild would indeed benefit from the gold.”
“I’LL KILL YOU!” I shouted. The game was all I had. Here, I was the famous Arladen, the Guild Master, the Mana Master. Outside I was a nobody.
“I WON’T GO DOWN THAT EASILY!” I roared and started throwing my body against the impenetrable energy barrier again and again. The barrier easily repelled my efforts. “I’LL KILL YOU ALL, TRAITORS!”
Even without my magical enhancements, I could use mana to empower my muscles, and I had a lot of mana. I threw my level 376 character recklessly against the magic barrier. BOOM! The entire floor reverberated when I hit it this time, a few books fell off one of the shelves, and cracks appeared on the floor. A few of the traitors exchanged worried looks. But my prison held.
“Now, now,” Vatras almost cooed. “This won’t hurt a bit,” as he unrolled the scroll. “Or maybe it will, I really don’t know,” he added with a shrug.
BOOM! More cracks appeared and a few chunks of roof tile fell on the people in the room. But Vatras pointedly ignored my desperate efforts.
“It’s time for you to lose everything, Oren.” Then he started reading the scroll, casting the spell over me.
I redoubled my efforts, BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! Spiderweb cracks spread around the room’s floor and ceiling. But it was useless. I could feel my body changing. My equipped items fell to the ground. Everything seemed to grow bigger and bigger, as I became smaller and smaller. The world started spinning around me, and my vision blurred.
As though from far away I heard, “Happy anniversary, Master.”
***
I looked bitterly at my new, goblin hands. I recalled everything in perfect detail now.
When my transformation into a goblin was done, all my items including the ones from my inventory dropped, scattering across the floor. I was left standing there, wearing only the default loincloth, stunned by the experience.
The guild members, my former comrades, laughed at and disparaged me while I stood there, incapacitated. When they had their fill of humiliating me that way, they started a game, throwing me around like a damn goblin kick toy, while an amused low-level healer stood by and occasionally cast Minor Heal so I wouldn’t die. When they were bored of playing goblin basketball, Vatras, my new nemesis, dragged me by the throat through the guild castle halls. On our way out, he’d taken a crude bone dagger off the wall and when he threw me out on the street, he tossed the dagger to me as a final insult.
“Here you go, a pig-sticker to match your ugly face. Wouldn’t want you to think your old guild didn’t do anything to help you out” he chuckled evilly. “Maybe it’ll help you survive for a few minutes, though I wouldn’t bet on it. Better hurry up and delete your character Oren, before someone makes goblin bits out of you.” Done with ridiculing me, he waved goodbye and turned back inside. “Goodbye, and good riddance master”.
So, there I stood, a small ugly goblin in the big shining human-built capital of Everance. I was in shock from the events, clutching the useless dagger like a lifeline. Suddenly I heard a shout from a noob that spotted me from the end of the street.
Life Reset Page 2