It was the things he was saying. The love in his heart.
“What?” she managed to gasp.
“I can do whatever I want, too.”
“Are you sure, though? I don’t want to—”
He touched her arm, to stop her from wasting her breath on an objection he wasn’t going to listen to anyway. Then he slowed to a walk. She slowed beside him, clutching her side.
“Deep, even breaths,” he told her to help with the cramp. Then he reached back into his pocket and pulled out the ticket.
“I can do what I want,” he repeated. “And this is it.”
He showed her the printout of his ticket to L.A. Then, in the middle of the race, the last runners and walkers weaving around them, he ripped it up and placed the pieces in her hands.
“Are you serious?” she said, staring at the scraps.
“I love you,” he said, cupping her hands in his. “And I’m staying in New York so I can keep on loving you more. No matter what happens between us, my life belongs with yours. I won’t always know the answers. Everything might not go according to plan. But I know what I want. It’s what I’ve wanted this whole time we’ve been together. It’s you. Whatever else happens, it’s always going to be you.”
He thought that would be it. They’d said what they needed to. Now they could get off the race course and put this behind them.
But Amanda took the ripped-up paper and shoved it back at him. Then she started to run.
He scrambled to catch up again. “What are you doing?” he asked.
“I have to finish.”
“You don’t have to prove anything to me.”
She shook her head and kept going, gritting her teeth against the strain. Goddammit, why’d he have to go and fall for someone so stubborn?
But he wouldn’t have it any other way.
When Amanda set her mind to something, she was all in. If she was going to be all in with him, he knew that meant it had to be the real deal. They were committed to each other, and that wasn’t going to change anymore.
Besides, he didn’t have years of training for nothing. He’d coached people through worse. Hell, he’d run through worse himself. If there was one thing he knew he could do, that he trusted himself to succeed at, it was getting her through this.
“Slow down,” he told her, shifting his stride for her to match.
She tried to protest, telling him again that she was going to finish, but he pressed his palm to the middle of her back to adjust her position and told her he wasn’t telling her to stop. Just slow down. “Set a pace where you know you can finish. It doesn’t have to be fast. It doesn’t have to be pretty. But this is how you’ll get it done.”
And then he coached her through it. Her time, her form, her breathing. Walking when she needed to walk. Urging her back to a jog when it was time. She was panting and sweating and cursing so profusely, every step another “fuck” under her breath, he couldn’t help laughing his ass off. Until she was laughing too hard to tell him how much everything hurt.
“I know it hurts,” he said. “That’s how you know you’re working.”
It seemed, in some weird way, like the truest thing he knew. Love could hurt…but it would be so much worse not to feel anything at all. Not to try, and fail, and try again. Not to get up and keep going.
He urged her on the same way he’d done around the reservoir, running from one tree to the next, and the next, and the next, until they were crossing the finish line and Amanda was falling into his arms and he was holding her up. Holding her in the way he wanted to for the rest of his life.
“Water,” she panted, and he helped her take small sips.
“This is the worst I love you I could have imagined,” she said. “I feel like I’m dying.”
“That’s how you know it’s real. No one would ever ask for this if they could choose another way.”
She laughed, clutching her side. “I can’t believe you willingly do this all the time.”
“It gets easier.” He paused, thinking about it. “Actually, it doesn’t. But you get stronger. Then you set the bar higher, and then you push yourself even more.”
“Not a chance,” she grumbled. “I’m never doing anything like this again.”
He leaned in close. “Just think of the massage you’ll get later,” he whispered, already imagining her body in his hands, what he was going to do to her…
“Promise?” she asked, her eyes lighting up with a spark that made him weaker in the knees than any race could do.
“You can count on it.”
You can count on me.
But when he suggested they go find Luke, he felt her pull back.
“Are you sure?” she asked uncertainly. “This still feels new. I’m happy. I want to stay happy.”
Noah smiled. Really smiled. The first one he’d felt in a long time.
“Luke’s happy for me. For us,” he added. “For you.”
She looked up at him and frowned. “He’s not going to be mad?”
“He’s the one who told me you were still running. He had your bib on the GPS.”
Amanda looked completely surprised, until he explained everything that had happened since she found him in the race. While she stood there, stunned, he took her in his arms and held her, the two of them flushed and sweaty and perfect.
“I already told him I’m not getting on that plane. I’m glad he’s happy for me. But even if he wasn’t—it’s still my decision.”
She eased into him, and he felt the way the hug turned into more. The way they held each other up. The way they stood there as one.
Finally, she pulled away. But only a little. Only enough to take his hand and say, “Let’s go be happy together.”
“With brunch?” he asked. “I’m starving.”
She laughed. “Let’s always be happy with brunch.”
She went to start walking, but he tugged her arm back once again.
“What?” she asked.
“I love you.” He kissed her forehead and closed his eyes, savoring the feeling of being so near her. For all the seconds, minutes, hours, days—all the years to come. “I just didn’t want to miss another opportunity to tell you.”
“I love you, too,” she said. “So I hope you’re okay with hearing it, because I plan on saying it a lot.”
“Baby,” he said with a laugh. “You have no idea. I can’t wait to hear it every goddamn day.”
He hooked his arm through hers and started walking down the path. Toward his brother, toward breakfast, toward the city traffic waking up to another weekend in Manhattan.
Toward the rest of his life.
Epilogue
“I can’t believe you made it!” Amanda didn’t wait for Luke to drop his suitcase before she ran up and threw her arms around him.
“Don’t hog him,” Noah said, cutting in for his turn. “He’s been on a plane for hours. Let the poor man breathe.”
“It’s just been so long.” But Amanda relented and let Noah have a chance to hug his brother—although she jumped back in as soon as she could, ushering him inside so he could get something to eat, see their new apartment, and catch up with their old friends.
She couldn’t believe he’d flown all the way back for their housewarming party. But Luke had insisted.
“My favorite people making their first home together?” he’d said on the phone when they’d called to tell him the good news. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
At one point, all of this would have seemed impossible. She never could have imagined moving in with Noah. Or being so excited to see Luke. But now, he didn’t just feel like one of her closest friends. He felt like family. Her family, as well as Noah’s.
How could it be uncomfortable sliding her hand into Noah’s as they gave Luke a tour of the apartment? How could an
yone care if she was kissing her boyfriend while his brother exclaimed over their new furniture?
“It’s not even that far,” Talia said, joining them in the living room. “You made it sound like you’d moved to another time zone.”
Amanda laughed. “It’s just farther out in Brooklyn than I used to be. I know it’s a hike for you and Reed, and I’m really excited you came.”
“Are you kidding?” Talia squished her into a hug. “The amount of space you guys have is giving me serious real estate envy.”
“Ditto,” Rose said. “I can’t believe how much you lucked out.”
“And I can build you a kitchen island,” Owen jumped in. “If you want more counter space.”
Noah’s jaw dropped, and Amanda was already going on about how they couldn’t possibly ask him to do that. But Owen simply shrugged and said it wasn’t a big deal. He could already picture where it could go.
“It won’t take that long,” he said. “I’m serious. I have a scrap of wood from another project that would be perfect for the base.”
Amanda turned to Rose. “Never, ever let that man go.”
Rose laughed and rested her head on her boyfriend’s shoulder. “Trust me,” she said. “There’s no way he’s getting away.”
Amanda’s heart was so full, she felt like she was bursting. Full of love for her friends, love for Noah, and love for the life they were building together.
Not to mention love that she was finally out of her old apartment and no longer living with roommates. Even if it meant she and Noah had had to move farther away from Manhattan to find an apartment they could afford, it was worth it. The space was airy and filled with light, and now they didn’t have to stress as much over the inevitable dips and slumps that came with Noah’s training cycle.
“If coaching is the job you want, you can do it,” she’d told him after he officially pulled out of the position in L.A. “But if it’s not the job you want, there are options, besides taking a soulless desk job you already know you’d hate.”
The answer wound up being somewhere in the middle. He’d picked up more clients and joined two running clubs to supplement his freelance coaching. Knowing that he wasn’t moving and wasn’t giving up had spurred something in him, making him even more committed to finding a way.
But she liked, too, that he could relax more now that he wasn’t so stressed about where his future was headed. Sunday mornings were always reserved for the two of them. They’d lounge in bed as long as they wanted and then make pancakes and, more often than not, find themselves back in bed again for round two.
On weekdays, he’d kiss her awake with coffee in bed when he came home from his first early run with clients. And if she wound up a little late for work more days than not, because those kisses inevitably turned into more? It hadn’t seemed to hurt her job prospects, either.
“Tell me everything that’s happening at Zenith,” Luke said as Shawn passed him one of the newest beers he’d brewed. “You, Amanda Perkins. Director.” He shook his head, his two dimples carved like commas around his smile. “I can’t believe you got promoted before me.”
“You’re the one who works at PlayStation now,” she reminded him. “You must have amazing projects.”
“Yeah, but nothing like the creative control you’ve got.”
“If you want Amanda to poach you back…” Noah suggested.
“Don’t think I wouldn’t love that,” Luke said with a groan. Then he grinned sheepishly. “But I don’t think Meaghan would go for it. Looks like for now, I’m stuck in L.A.”
Amanda couldn’t hide her surprise. “You’re still together?”
Luke laughed loudly. “Shocking, I know. Guess my brother showed me a little something about commitment.” He elbowed Noah playfully in the ribs, and Noah held up his hands in surrender.
“I didn’t say to follow your heart for just anyone,” he pointed out. “Only when the best woman you’ve ever met in your life comes along.”
“Wow,” Amanda teased. “That woman sounds amazing. Let me know if you meet her.”
Noah pulled her into a bear hug, kissing her forehead. “She’s already mine,” he whispered, and Amanda’s knees weakened in that way they always did around him. In that way she knew they always would.
There’d been so much uncertainty when she and Noah got together. What they were doing, what they meant to each other, where the future was going.
But now, as she watched her boyfriend and her best friends all hanging out together in their new apartment, nothing felt uncertain at all. That didn’t mean she knew everything that was coming. But there were some major things she could count on. Like whatever happened, Noah would be by her side.
There was her promotion at Zenith and Noah’s growing client base. But it was other things, too. Their families fit together. Their friends. Amanda’s mother loved Noah so much, she was even starting to listen to him as he encouraged her to sell the house and move into a condo where the upkeep would be taken care of. She’d been worried her mom would go on and on about what a mistake she was making by moving in with Noah. But even her mom hadn’t had any doubts.
“Take good care of my baby,” she said to Noah every time they left her house in New Jersey.
“I promise, Mrs. Perkins. I will.”
And Amanda knew he meant it. They’d keep taking care of each other every single day.
Like now, when Noah was making sure all their friends had plenty to eat and drink, and Amanda was getting everyone to mingle. Before she knew it, Talia had cranked up the music in the apartment, and everyone was dancing in the living room. As more friends showed up, the apartment was packed. Everyone was talking, laughing, eating, and dancing—there to celebrate her and Noah, their friendship, their new home. And their love.
“Can you believe it?” she said to him as she pulled him down for a kiss.
“Can I believe what a lucky bastard I am?” He laughed and shook his head. “I just keep thinking—if only I’d known sooner what you and I have together. Think of all the time I wouldn’t have wasted.”
Amanda knew what he meant. But she kissed her fingertips and pressed them to his lips to quiet him. “We may have found each other by accident, Noah. But it happened when the timing was right. I wouldn’t change that for anything in the world.”
They couldn’t predict the future. There’d be plenty of curveballs coming their way. But one thing she knew she could count on. Noah’s arms around her, his lips on hers.
How could she ever have thought she couldn’t have this? How could she ever have wanted anything else? Her whole life was right here, in her arms.
I’m so lucky, she couldn’t help thinking as they danced together, and she rose up on the toes of her Doc Martens to kiss him.
She knew she’d keep thinking it for the rest of her life. Whatever new surprises came her way.
Like FREE Books?! Download one of Entangled’s bestselling books here!
Acknowledgments
I can’t believe this is my tenth novel! I’m so grateful to everyone who’s supported me through every step of this dream come true, from my rockstar agent Andrea Somberg to the whole team at Entangled Publishing. Thank you Riki Cleveland, Meredith Johnson, Bree Archer, Liz Pelletier, Katie Clapsadl, and especially my editor Erin Molta, who dived right into this series full of ideas for Amanda and Noah and brought out the best (and worst, ha!) in both of them.
I owe special thanks to running coach Daphne Matalene, who went above and beyond answering questions from this random author about what it’s really like to be a running coach in NYC. Go blue! New York Road Runners also provided lots of helpful information. I wish I could say I went all in and took some running lessons to really get into character, but that’s what the writerly imagination is for. Any errors or inaccuracies are, of course, my own.
Last but never least, thank you to
my husband, Robert Farrell, for all his support and encouragement and especially for making sure we never ran out of chocolate through all ten books. I couldn’t have done any of this without him.
As I write these acknowledgments, and think of everything I’m thankful for, things are rough in New York City and all over the world. I’m grateful for this city I’ve come to call home, for the readers near and far who’ve become part of my community, and for all the happy endings we need now more than ever. I dedicated this book to you, the reader—even if we’ve never met, I’m so grateful for you.
About the Author
Rebecca Brooks lives in New York City in an apartment filled with books. She received a PhD in English but decided it was more fun to write books than write about them. She has backpacked alone through India and Brazil, traveled by cargo boat down the Amazon River, climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro, explored ice caves in Peru, trekked to the source of the Ganges, and sunbathed in Burma, but she always likes coming home to a cold beer and her hot husband in the Bronx.
Don’t miss the start of the Accidental Love series with Wrong Bed, Right Roommate, available now!
Rebecca’s books: https://rebeccabrooksromance.com/books
Stay in touch with Rebecca!
Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/beccabooks
Facebook: www.facebook.com/rebeccabrooksromance
Instagram: www.instagram/com/rebeccabrooksromance
Discover the Accidental Love series…
Wrong Bed, Right Roommate
Wrong Bed, Right Girl
Wrong Bed, Right Man
Also by Rebecca Brooks
Make Me Stay
Make Me Beg
Make Me Want
Make Me Yours
How to Fall
If you love sexy romance, one-click these steamy Brazen releases…
A Whole Lotta Trouble
Wrong Bed, Right Brother (Accidental Love) Page 19