I put a hand on his arm, which felt like wet stone under my fingertips. “I think everyone needs to go to their separate corners and try and get some sleep. We’re going to head out early in the morning and none of us has gotten very much rest over the last few days. We’re all wet and on edge but threatening one another isn’t doing any good.”
If collapsing in a heap on the ground was an option, I would have gladly taken it but I didn’t want to end up even wetter and more miserable than I already was.
Cy loosened his rigid stance and moved to put his arm around me. Typically, when he pulled me into his broad chest it was like being engulfed in warmth and comfort. It was a testament as to how crappy the conditions were that he was just as chilled and just as clammy as I was. I didn’t snuggle into him like I wanted to, but I did rest my forehead against the hollow of his throat. I couldn’t resist the urge to lick at a drop of rain that trickled down the strong column and across my lips. The little touch of tongue to cool skin made him shiver and had his arms tightening around me.
“I need to get a fire started so we don’t freeze to death tonight and to keep the predators I’m actually afraid of away.” He was trying to normalize the situation for me and I wanted to kiss him from head to toe in gratitude. His caring went bone deep and didn’t falter, even when it would be easy and reasonable to brush to the side, considering the circumstances. I let him go and straightened my shoulders because if he could bend but refuse to break, then so could I. And I was going to hold on, and ride out the storm, weather beaten but still standing on the other side. That wasn’t something I would have believed myself capable of doing a few days ago, but this trip and all the ways it had not gone as planned was undeniably eye opening.
I left Cy to work on the fire and made my way over to the horses to see if there was anything I could do to make them more comfortable in the drizzle that was still coming from the sky. The poor animals had pushed just as hard as we had and there was no way they weren’t exhausted and sick of being wet and cold, just like I was.
In the middle of rubbing Edgar down with a lone dry blanket I found, I heard footsteps behind me that were too light to belong to any of the men in our motley crew. I looked over my shoulder as the ranger approached and tried not to stiffen or launch my automatic defenses when she gave me a considering look that raked from the top of my head to my toes.
“You’re pretty good with the horses for a California girl.” Her tone was dry and she made no effort to hide the sarcasm in it.
I lifted an eyebrow in her direction. “How do you know I’m from California?’
She lifted a shoulder and let it fall, eyes never moving from what I was doing with the horses. “I asked Cy to give me a rundown of all the guests including where they were from in case we have to launch an official search party.”
I nodded at her and calmly told her, “Believe it or not, they have horses in California.” I didn’t toss her snide tone back at her, I kept mine even and bland. I didn’t need her to point out that she was a much better fit for the man hunched over a pile of kindling, trying to make something burn in the nearly impossibly conditions. I knew I wasn’t who Cy needed, but there was no hiding the fact that I was who he wanted.
She took her hat off and shook it out. I felt all the air rush out of my lungs when I realized she was something more than beautiful when her entire face was visible. I was starting to think there was something in the water out here that made the men and woman forged from this land outrageously attractive.
“He does this all the time, you know.” She put her hands on her hips and gave me a steady look. “I’m not trying to be a bitch but I’ve known those Warner boys for a long time and the one thing all of them have in common is the habit of wasting time on the wrong women. I admire you stepping up to the plate when you are so clearly out of your element. Most women in your shoes would have demanded someone take them back to the ranch or opted to lay low at the cabin. I don’t want you to have some kind of false fantasy built up about Cy, where you think things between the two of you last beyond your time on his turf. Once you’re gone . . . you’re gone and he’ll be onto the next one.” The words were callous but I could see that she really thought she was doing me a favor by laying them on me like bricks. She was telling me, like I should have told Chris’s wife, the kind of man I was losing more and more of myself to. She wasn’t worried about my reaction or the outcome because to her, she was looking out for me in her own blunt and abrasive way.
I straightened up and gathered my hair into my hands so I could wring the kinky mass out. The stands were slippery and chilly to the touch. There was also a knot on the underneath side that I was pretty sure was going to require scissors to remove. Typically, I didn’t belong here and this wasn’t my place, but right now I did and there wasn’t anything that would convince me otherwise . . . even the uncomfortable truth of her not-so-friendly warning.
I raised a shoulder and let it fall. “I’ll be gone but not forgotten. I went into this thing with Cy knowing that had to be enough.”
She cocked her head to the side a little and a wry grin pulled at her lips. “Again, you’re very brave. Most of the women he burns through are so blinded by that face and that body that they ignore the fact that every flame flickers out eventually. You see the burnout right in front of you and you’re still playing with fire.”
I nodded a little bit and gave her my own grin. “Why wouldn’t I? I’ve never had the opportunity to get my hands on something that hot before. I might as well enjoy the heat while I can.”
She slapped her soggy hat back on her head and gave me a smile that was full of perfectly straight white teeth and revealed an adorable dimple in her cheek. The woman was physically something else, she really had to be as perfect as any human could be in order to offset her cool and standoffish demeanor. “I like you, Cali girl, and I like that Cy likes you. It’s a shame you can’t stick around a little longer because I think you might actually do the man some good. He almost smiled today.”
I didn’t tell her as she turned and walked away from me that I made him smile all the time when we were together.
Not in the Plan
We left the makeshift camp before the first rays of dawn were in the sky. No one slept very well on the wet ground and everyone was on high alert, so the tension and unease made sleep nearly impossible. Officer McKenna called into her headquarters and let them know the general direction we were headed. She also instructed whoever was on the other end of the radio transmission to send someone to where the field was located, just in case we couldn’t make it back for the horses. The idea of leaving the animals alone and untended didn’t sit well with Cy, but it was the idea of any of us not making it back to take care of them that had me breaking out in a sweat despite the frosty chill in the morning air.
Before we set off on foot through the woods, Cy made sure I knew how to handle, load, and shoot the long barreled shotgun, which ended up slung over my shoulder. My hands shook when I shoved the shells into the weapon, but I was pretty sure I could point and shoot it, if the need arose. I’d never felt so far away from my normal life as I did trudging in a line, barely able to see, chilled to the bone, armed to the teeth, on a rescue mission to save my best friend from men who may or may not be tied to a drug cartel. This all while quickly slipping and falling dangerously close to something that looked like being in love with a man who was never meant to be for me. The whole thing was more than any single, normal person should experience in a lifetime. It was the bombardment of new knowledge and understanding that I was struggling to keep my head above. It felt like if I faltered at all, everything that was going on around me would swallow me up and spit me out, battered and lost on the other side of it. As long as I kept my head up and my eyes firmly focused on what lay ahead, I believed there was a fighting chance to make it through all of this happy and whole, with a wealth of new experiences under my belt. Experiences that would fill up all of the empty spaces when I made
my way back to my boring and basic life. Experiences that would keep me company in the dark, while my body longed for Cy’s touch and the rough sound of his deep voice vibrating across my skin.
I let out a sigh that I thought was quiet, but it had all three of the men in front of me turning their heads to look at me. The attention made me blush, so I waved a hand and told them, “Don’t mind me. This is more exercise than I’m used to. I don’t think I was made to hike endless miles through the woods loaded down with gear.” I worked in a high rise office, for goodness sakes. The only time I took the stairs was when the elevator was down and even then I complained the entire way.
“Isn’t San Francisco all hills?” Webb tossed the question over his injured shoulder and I was annoyed by how even his tone was. He was breathing easy, even though his injured shoulder was drooping obviously lower than his good one. He was still pale and a little bit shaky, but doing a damn good job trying to hide whatever pain he was in. He didn’t want to be a liability and neither did I.
“It is, but I don’t spend my free time trekking up and down those hills carrying a shotgun and marching into secret drug dens where my best friend may or may not be held captive.” There was frost in my tone and the younger man had the sense to look contrite.
“Sorry, Leo. I didn’t mean anything by it.” His apology had me sighing again.
“I know, I’m just edgy. I’m worried about Emrys and Sutton. I’m worried about what’s going to happen when we get to where the clearing is. I don’t do well with situations that I can’t control and there is nothing about what we’re walking into that is controllable or safe.” I was drowning in uncertainty and I hated it.
Webb’s features contorted into something serious and pensive. His eyebrows lowered into a sharp V over the bridge of his nose, as the corners of his mouth tugged downwards in a deep frown. “Control is an illusion. You think you’re pulling the strings in life but you’re not. All you’re doing is dangling at the end of them and shifting whatever way the wind decides to blow you. The only thing you are responsible for is your own actions, so you might as well make those actions matter. Sutton and Emrys stumbling across these assholes was bad luck and being in the worst place at the right time, nothing more, nothing less. The fact that you’re here, that you are willing to do whatever it takes to help your friend, those actions are within your control and speak volumes about the person you are.”
There was respect in his voice when he addressed me. For some reason, that praise meant more than any of the throwaway compliments I got from the men in suits who gave me a pat on the back over a job well done in my day-to-day life. This stoic ex-con, with a reckless attitude and revenge on his mind, made me feel better about myself and my choices in a way I had been searching for since Chris shattered my confidence.
I was going to tell him thank you and let him know that his insightful observation was very much needed and appreciated when an ear-piercing scream split the air. The noise obviously had come from a woman and obviously originated from the clearing where we were headed. My knees went weak when I realized the sound had to have come from Emrys. I reached out a hand and grabbed the closest branch to me so that I could stay on my feet. I stopped breathing as our little caravan came to a startled stop and exchanged somber looks.
“We need to move.” Cy muttered the words low under his breath as we wordlessly picked up the pace, maneuvering through the trees and over the rough terrain with purpose, and no small amount of panic. There was another scream, this one louder and longer than the one before it. Abruptly it was cut off. The shock of the silence made me start crying.
Emrys was out there being hurt and there was nothing I could do to stop it. Everything that she might be enduring in order to make her sound like that started running through my head like the most horrific and graphic movie that ever existed. The horrifying visions made me stumble and stagger. Luckily, Cy was there to put a hand on my arm and to catch me before I pitched forward onto my face. He wiped the tears running down my cheeks away with his thumbs, but he didn’t bother to lie by trying to tell me that everything was going to be okay.
It took longer than I wanted to think about to get to a place where the clearing in the trees was visible. Grady made us all stop far enough away that we were still sheltered in the thicket of the forest and quietly asked where we thought Sutton and Emrys would most likely be located. When I had fallen and landed on the leveled spot, I didn’t notice any kind of buildings or structures around the perimeter. Cy told the former agent that he hadn’t seen anything either but couldn’t imagine that the growers would want to be very far away from their crops in case intruders stumbled upon the site.
Tennyson tossed the extra radio to Webb and adjusted the rifle she had on her shoulder. “I’ll circle around and get up higher on the hill behind the field so I can keep you guys covered. I’m sure I’ll spot wherever they have their base set up once I’m on the ridge.”
The men nodded as she shifted her gaze to me. “You up for a little bit of a hike, Cali girl? You come with me so you can set that flare off from up high where no one can miss it. If bullets start flying, I’ll need you to be the lookout while I keep the bad guys pinned down.”
I gulped, because I didn’t want to leave Cy or either of the other men I had been in the trenches with up to this point, but I was smart enough to know this was the ranger’s way of putting the civilian, and least experienced member of the group, as far out of the line of fire as she could. This was the way I could help rather than hinder, so I nodded. “I’ll follow you.”
I took a step toward the ranger only to be yanked back and spun around so I was facing Cy. His gray eyes were stormier than the skies above us had been the last few days and the lines of tension and concern that were carved into his hard face made him appear much older than he was. It was like all of this had finally aged him enough to catch up to the silver threads woven throughout his dark hair and beard.
“Be careful, Sunshine.” The rumble in his voice made me shiver and the iron grip he held me in made me tremble.
“I’m not the one heading into a camp full of armed men who have a vested interest in making sure none of us make it home. You be careful. Go get my friend and your brother out of trouble.” I put a hand over his heart and startled a little bit when I felt how fast it was racing. He was just as worried about the unknown as I was, but he was letting his actions speak for him.
He exhaled long and slow. When he bent his head to press his lips to mine, it wasn’t a man stealing moments and making memories to hold onto because that’s all that would be left. No, this kiss came from a man who wanted to stake his claim. It was a kiss that was meant to imprint and last forever . . . however long that may be. It was a kiss meant to sear and mark the soul, so that pieces of him were eternally fused to pieces of me.
Tongues twisted.
Lips moved ravenously, hungrily against one another.
Teeth nipped and clicked together.
Breath mingled and was stolen and was replaced with soft sighs and murmurs of satisfaction.
Hands held on for dear life because even as the kiss consumed, the fact that we were going to have to let go soon, lingered between us.
I gave him a tight squeeze, felt his heart leap like it wanted to touch me, and then I did what I absolutely didn’t want to do. I let go and stepped away from him. We were both breathing hard and looking a little dazed, but there was no time to process what that kiss and all the substantial, important things inside of it meant to us.
“Make sure you get back to me, Leo. I’m not done enjoying my time in the sun.” His words were for my ears only, barely a sound, just a breath of noise that hit me like a ton of bricks. No one but Cyrus Warner considered me bright and shiny which was all the more reason my heart seemed so willing to jump wildly and carelessly into his hands.
“We aren’t done just yet, Cy. We’ll find our way back to each other.” My reply was just as soft as I leaned up on my toes so I co
uld give him a quick little peck on the cheek, then I took a deep breath and braced. “I’m ready.”
Tennyson nodded, and without a word, started off on a path that was parallel to the scar cut into the earth that was the grow field. She took careful steps, making sure she didn’t break branches or kick any rocks that would alert to anyone who might be lurking around to the fact we were sulking through the woods.
“There’s a big rock outcropping up on a ridge about twenty minutes this way. The rocks are big enough that they’ll offer cover if we get fired at and they’re far enough away that no one will be able to find us right away after that first flare goes off. I just hope they set up operations close by, so I can direct the guys to the camp.” She was whispering, but even that sound echoed loudly in the vast quiet of the forest surrounding us.
I swatted at a pinecone that fell when I brushed against a branch and made sure to step around it so that the brittle texture didn’t crunch under my boots. “They can’t be that far. We wouldn’t have heard Em screaming if they were too far away from the field.”
She looked at me over her shoulder and frowned. She snatched her hat off of her head and tossed it to me. “Put that on. I didn’t realize how bright your hair was once the sun was out. It’s like a damn beacon and there’s no telling how close they are. Sound carries for miles and miles.”
I snorted a little bit while trying to shove as much of my hair under her ugly hat as I could, which had her lifting her brows questioningly. “I learned that lesson the hard way. I may have accused Cy and his brothers of not being cowboy enough for this business when we first met. I didn’t think anyone could hear me and I was very wrong.”
She rolled her eyes with a snort of laughter and turned her head back around as the trees started to thin out, as the terrain got rockier and rougher to traverse. “Cy can cowboy up when he has to, but he’s always hated that label and the stigma of what life on a ranch should be. I’ll deny it if you ever tell him I said it, but I think a lot of his reluctance to own up to being a cowboy comes from the fact his mom never stuck around and stood by his dad. Boyd Warner was cowboy through and through. I always got the impression that Cy believed if he could be all the things his dad wasn’t, then maybe he would find a woman who wouldn’t leave.” She shrugged and looked at me over her shoulder. “He tried to be something else but that man was born with the ranch and the west in his blood. He couldn’t outrun his heritage and he found a woman who couldn’t deal with how deep his roots ran. She did her best to cut them but they’re dug all the way in. He ended up with a woman who couldn’t love a cowboy, just like his sorry excuse for a mother. The strong survive out here and the tough flourish. They don’t come much stronger and tougher than Cy. He needs a woman who appreciates that.”
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