Tangling my fingers in the fabric of his dark blue dress shirt, I try to explain how I felt. “I think I would have been okay if I hadn’t moved over to Ollie. But as soon as I got close to him, I felt horrible. Like I could barely stand up. I feel better now though.”
“It takes a lot of energy to shadow walk,” Ares informs me.
I nod. “Sorry if I took all yours when you got here. I didn’t mean to, it just happened.”
“Don’t be sorry, and I’m fine. I could feel you pulling from me, but it comes right back. Like a loop.”
“Are you sure?” I can’t help but feel guilty, it was like I didn’t even have a choice, my body just took what it needed from him.
“Promise, I’m good,” Ares murmurs, drawing me closer to his chest. I feel the heat of him seeping into my bones, leaving me feeling a little breathless and a lot turned on. If the hardness I feel under me is any indication, he’s feeling the same.
Dante shoulders his way into the room, his eyes scanning the gym. “We need to get our own place, I can’t keep running interference with Mom and the dads. Everything okay?”
“I think Laura just overexerted herself, she’s okay. And I’m working on it.” Ares pats my hip, telling me to stand. Releasing him, I get to my feet and Ares rises right behind me, keeping me in front of him as he turns us to face the others.
“Now we know she can use my ability even if she isn’t drawing it directly from me, but it takes a lot of energy. We’ll have to see if I’m with her, if it’ll have the same effects. Same for you.” Ares nods his head in Ollie’s direction. “But we will need to hold off on the training sessions for a day or two anyway.”
Ollie swallows. “Yeah, I think that would be good,” he agrees easily.
I look over my shoulder, but Ares won’t make eye contact with me. “Why, what’s up?” Milo leans his shoulder against the wall, his feet crossed at the ankle.
“I set up a meeting with the Whitmores,” Ares announces, and it drops like a lead weight. I pull away from him and study his face, but he’s still not looking at me. “I’ve been working on a cover story since we found out about Leon.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?” There’s an accusation in my tone.
Ares finally meets my eyes and his are filled with determination. I know there won’t be any stopping him. “I think it’s the best way to find out about Leon.” I look down at the ground, mad that he hasn’t been keeping me in the loop.
“What’s your in?” Milo moves over to a set of dumbbells lined up on a metal pyramid, and he picks up the fifty-pound weight and turns it over in his hand like he’s inspecting it, like it doesn’t weigh much at all.
“Security, I reached out to them and a few other Infinity groups living in their community to offer my services,” Ares explains. “I put out some feelers about relocating out that way and wanted to get a head start on some business relationships.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?” I cross my arms over my stomach. I haven’t felt like an outsider with them in a while, but Ares keeping this from me reminds me that I’m still a secret. That other than their families, no one knows about me.
“I didn’t want to say anything if it didn’t pan out. I got the call yesterday that Ms. Whitmore was willing to meet, and I wanted to set up a few other meetings so it wouldn’t seem suspicious.”
I glance at the others, none of them seem surprised about this development. Milo asked how he got in, but it almost seems like he knew he was trying, and he was only asking which avenue worked. “You guys knew.” It’s not a question.
“We knew he would try,” Dante confirms.
“This is such utter bullshit,” I grit out through my teeth. I spin on my heel, pissed off that they keep shit from me. Ollie calls my name before I’m even out the door. I ignore him and the ache in my heart that says how hurt I really am.
Chapter 3
In my haste to get away from the guys, I left without any real plan of where I was going. Ares’s bedroom is out, for obvious reasons. I really don’t feel like running into Rosa, William, or Mal either.
I find a small room on the main floor that looks like a little sunporch. There are a few wicker rocking chairs on an old rag rug that look like they get little use. The walls are raw wood, cedar maybe, making it feel cozy. Two sides of the room are made up of mostly screen. The cool, evening autumn air blows in, bringing scents of burning fires and dry leaves. There isn’t much else in the room, just a small matching table between the chairs, and nothing on the wall behind me. It feels a little barren, but I like it regardless.
Gingerly, I lower myself onto one of the chairs and I get a little creak of protest, but it feels sturdy enough, so I let my weight sink into the tufted cushion. Darkness falls early now, so I can’t see much beyond the porch. I gaze out into the evening anyway, imagining a large backyard with a few trees dotted around to give plenty of shade on hot summer days.
Closing my eyes, I tip my head back to rest against the chair. I don’t understand why Ares didn’t tell me what he was planning. Why didn’t any of them mention it to me? I bring my legs up into the chair, tucking them beneath me. I hate feeling like I’m being left in the dark. Finding out I’ve been uninformed my whole life makes me feel powerless. Like I have no control over what happens. I hate that they did the same thing to me.
Letting out a heavy sigh, I relax into the wicker rocking chair. It’s true I’m aggravated that they kept this from me, but I’m also worried. What could Ares be getting himself into by going out there?
There’s a part of me that knows Leon has something to do with my mom’s disappearance, and if that’s true, then he probably already knows about me. Wouldn’t he be suspicious if someone from the same area comes asking questions? Wouldn’t it lead him right to us?
If I wouldn’t have run off like a toddler with a temper tantrum, I could have posed those questions, but I let myself get too angry about not being included. Frustration with myself and the situation weighs on me. I can’t keep running when things aren’t going my way. But that’s what we’ve always done.
Soft footsteps in the hall draw my attention, and I know it’s not Dante or Ares. The bond would have told me they were close before I heard them. Ollie doesn’t have the same stealthy mannerisms that come naturally to the brothers, so I don’t think it’s him either.
Rosa pokes her head into the room, her large eyes falling on me. “Ciao Laura, mind if I sit?” Her voice is light, and I think she would leave me without getting upset if I told her I wanted some time alone. But I don’t really want her to go.
Rearranging myself in the chair so my feet hit the floor, I tell her, “Please, it’s your house.” I wave my hand at the empty chair beside me.
Rosa slips past the door, heading to the chair. She’s wearing a dark, chunky sweater with light gray pants, and she looks comfortable, but stylish. Her dark hair is curled softly away from her face, showing off her beautiful features.
“How are you?” she asks, once she’s folded herself into the chair with an elegance, I don’t think I’ll ever possess.
“I’m holding up.” I don’t want to lie to her and tell her everything is fine, but I also don’t want to tell her how crazy I’m really feeling either.
“You don’t give yourself enough credit darling. You’re doing more than holding up.” Rosa looks out into the backyard. Her words are delivered kindly, she’s not putting me on the spot, and I don’t feel like I need to defend how I’m feeling.
She seems content to just sit with me, providing company while I wrestle with what to do next. She doesn’t push me to talk, or question why I’m out here instead of in the house with the guys. It’s nice having her here with me. I can’t pretend I know her that well yet, but I feel like I know her more than what I would have expected at this point.
Our situation lends itself to an intimacy I don’t think you’d find in a normal relationship with your partner’s parents. “I haven’t bonded with Milo or
Ollie yet,” I blurt out, it’s not something I planned to say, more something that just pops out as my thoughts begin to unravel.
Rosa looks over at me, her eyes clear, but a little heavy like she was just as comfortable in the quiet as I’d assumed. “I know, no need to rush.”
“But… is that normal? The guys, they don’t… they’re not exactly… forthcoming with information all the time,” I stammer. I don’t want her to think I’m insulting them. But I have questions, and maybe she can answer some of them.
Rosa lets out a soft chuckle. “I don’t imagine they would say anything they think might upset you.” She reaches over and places her hand over mine for a brief moment, before pulling away. “Forgive them.” She sighs. “Men often make more of a mess of something that could have been easily solved if they would get out of their own way. So often they think they’re protecting us from things we don’t need protecting from.” I can almost hear Rosa’s eye roll.
Her words make a grin tug at the corner of my mouth. I can’t imagine Mal or William ever keeping anything from her. I’ve seen her when she gets riled up and I wouldn’t want to be on the receiving end of her anger.
“There isn’t a standard here Laura,” Rosa tells me, meeting my eyes. “Everything about your Infinity is unique, as are you. There isn’t a rule book or an example you need to adhere to or follow, you do what’s best for you and the others. You’ll know when the time is right, as you did with Ares and Dante.”
I mull over her words and she waits patiently for me to continue. “Sometimes it doesn’t feel real,” I confess, looking out into the darkness.
“That I can understand, especially in your situation.” Rosa tucks a wave of hair over her shoulder as her eyes narrow, like she’s thinking back to the past. “When I was first introduced to William and Malcom, I couldn’t believe they were chosen for me. I was sure that any moment something would happen, and they would realize I wasn’t the one. It seemed almost too good to be true, and I grew up knowing one day I would find my pairs.” Rosa pauses letting her words sink in.
She’s telling me that my thoughts are normal, that we all experience the doubt and worry. Could it really be that simple, that everyone has these feelings? Like she knows what I’m thinking, Rosa states, “It gets easier.”
“When?” I can’t keep the question from leaving my lips.
Rosa’s lips thin and the corners of her eyes turn down like she might frown, but she stops herself. “Once you’re bonded.” She shrugs her shoulders like she’s sorry that’s her answer, but gives me the truth anyway, even though she knows it’s not what I wanted to hear. I appreciate her honesty and a sense of calm falls over me.
Her answer might not be the definite time frame I wanted, because let’s be honest, if I could have the lingering doubts and worries go away right now, that would be the best option, but at least she’s giving me the truth. She’s not treating me with kid gloves, and I can respect that. I can deal with that. “Thank you,” I respond, and I hope she knows that I’m thanking her for more than just talking to me, I hope she knows how grateful I am that she understood I could handle the truth, even if it’s not ideal.
An easy twenty minutes pass without either of us interrupting the quiet that has settled over us. Me clearing my throat is the first sign I will change that. “I think I’m going to go have a talk with the guys. Ares told me he was heading out to meet with Leon’s family, and I have some questions.”
“I think that’s a good idea,” Rosa replies. “I think I’ll sit a while longer. I forgot how lovely the evenings are here.” Her eyes meet mine and something passes between us, an understanding, an acceptance? Maybe even a little gratitude from both of us.
“Thank you, Rosa,” I utter quietly.
She smiles at me, the corner of her eyes crinkling up with the quirk of her lips. “Anytime.”
Chapter 4
It’s easy to find the guys, they’re all in Ares’s room. Their conversation dries up the moment I open the door. Dante’s head is already turned in my direction, while Ollie adjusts his body so he can see me from his spot on the floor.
I close the door behind me with a quiet snap. Ares comes out of the bathroom, one towel around his waist and rubbing another one over his hair as he watches me. It becomes clear they’re all waiting for me.
I’m ready to a really talk about what Ares is planning, and about me not wanting to be left out, even if they think they’re protecting me. I want to put our cards on the table. I’ve accepted that I need to bond with Ollie and Milo too, when they’re ready of course. It’s not a question about Ollie, I think he wants it, has wanted it, but something tells me Milo is still holding himself back.
Bracing my hands behind me, I lean against the door. Ares’s eyes flow over me, he doesn’t hide the way he looks at me, never has. I glance over at Dante and Milo next to him, leaning against the wall behind the bed. Dante looks unruffled, his shoulders are back, and his face is turned toward me with an openness that I don’t see in Milo. He looks much more guarded—is that a side effect of us not having bonded yet?
Ollie props his head up on his hand where he’s lounging on the floor near the foot of the bed. Again, I’m struck how they’re all waiting for me.
The TV isn’t on and the silence hangs between us, eating away a little of my conviction. Ares rubs the towel over his hair and shakes his head once he pulls it away. His movements spur me into speaking. I have all of their attention, and that’s exactly what I want. I need them to understand, hopefully for the last time, that I need to know what’s happening in my life.
“Sorry I ran off, I needed a little while to think.”
“It’s okay,” Milo rushes out, like he’s been waiting to say something. I take in his big body, the way he’s holding himself so still against the wall. His shoulders are rigid, his hands clasped tightly over his knees. From the distance between us I can’t make out the blue of his eyes, but I can see the furrow of his brow, the way his chest is moving up and down a little too fast for someone just sitting there.
“Well, I shouldn’t have stormed off, we need to talk.” I look away from Milo. I want all of them to hear me.
Ares tosses the towel he was using near the bathroom door and it lands with a damp plop on the floor. It’s a sign he isn’t exactly himself either. He always puts his stuff where it belongs, whether it’s in the hamper or hung back up, he hates messes.
Dante tips his head back and I see his nostrils flare like he’s taking a deep breath. Scenting me. His head lowers, and he continues to stare at me from under his brows.
With my hands still locked behind me, I shift my weight from one foot to the other. “I don’t like the fact that you kept this from me.” When Ares opens his mouth, I hold up my hand to stop him. “I know what you’re going to say, it doesn’t even matter. I know why you did it. You think you’re protecting me.”
Ollie sits up so he no longer lying down. Using the bed, he heaves himself up and takes a seat on the edge. Ares winces, and his hands move to his exposed hips as his head hangs. “Would it help if I said I was sorry, and it wasn’t intentional? I didn’t plan not to tell you.” Ares lifts his head, so he’s looking at me. “I was just thinking about getting answers. I thought if I told you once I knew something for sure, then I was just saving you from worrying about it.” He raises his hand much like I did moments ago, stopping me from saying anything.
“I see that was a bad choice, I’ll even admit that you’re probably right. I was trying to protect you, but it wasn’t something I did on purpose. I did it without even realizing why I was doing it.”
Surprised by his admittance and his apology, I take my hands from behind my back and stand with my spine straight. That was way easier than I was expecting, but I’m not done yet. “You guys can’t do that though.” I make sure to look each of them in the eye while saying it. I want them to know that I don’t blame them all for not telling me, but I think they each played a part. “I need to know what
’s going on.”
I don’t feel like I need to rehash my explanations, I’ve already told them I’m tired of not knowing what is going on in my own life. I’m willing to let this go because we’re all new to this. I know I’ve made mistakes, and will probably continue to make mistakes.
“We’ll do better,” Dante rumbles. He looks at his brother first, then at Milo and Ollie.
I let out a deep breath. “Okay, okay. So, let’s talk about what you’re planning.” I focus my attention on Ares but look away quickly. His state of undress is too distracting. “Can you put something on?” I whisper almost to myself, but he hears me.
Heading straight in my direction he gets uncomfortably close, his warm skin millimeters from mine as he leans down and places a chaste kiss to my temple. He’s gone a second later, heading to the closet off to my right.
I pretend his nearness doesn’t affect me as I make my way over to the bed to sit down. Ollie immediately scoots closer. His hand finds mine, and he intertwines our fingers, placing them in his lap. I give him a grateful squeeze and wait for Ares to come back from the closet.
I don’t have to wait long, but unfortunately, he’s still distracting. He replaced the towel with a low-slung pair of light gray sweatpants. His feet are bare, as is his chest. I can see his mark peeking up just above the waistband of his pants. Distracting indeed.
Oblivious to my gawking, Ares stands a few feet in front of me with his hands hung loosely at his sides. His head it tipped back just enough that it makes the thickness of his neck more appealing. I look down and swallow. Jesus, how can I be thinking about how gorgeous he looks right now?
“Several people were asking why I came home, I’ve been gone for almost two years, so a few people speculated that something changed. I haven’t really responded one way or another, but after we found out about Leon, I used the rumors to my advantage.”
Infinity Chronicles Book Three Page 3