Well, fuck me.
I swallow down the thick lump of embarrassment that has lodged itself in the middle of my throat and admit, “You’re right.” That’s the thing about clarity, it can be a real bitch. It’s painful to take a hard look at your own behavior and realize that you’ve fucked it up but good. “I shouldn’t have messed with Skye. I should have let our past go and moved on.”
Jax watches me silently as if he’s not quite sure he can believe me.
If I’m going to be honest, I might as well bare my whole fucking soul. What do I have to lose at this point? “I love her, Jax. I always have. There are no excuses for my behavior and you’re right to call me out on it, but I’m concerned. I just want to know that she’s all right. That’s it.”
Silence settles around us and I wonder if he’ll say anything more.
“I swear to God, Price,” he grumbles, watching me through narrowed eyes, “you better not make me regret this. I give zero fucks if you’re my QB.” Jax huffs out a breath before admitting, “She’s at the townhouse. Her dad isn’t doing well. You don’t need to worry about her falling apart in class. She already emailed Bennet to let her know what was going on and I’ve been taking notes for her.”
Dean had looked pretty bad when I ran into him at the hospital. If it’s gotten worse…
“I know about the cancer,” I say.
Jax’s shoulders fall and sorrow fills his voice. “I guess the chemo isn’t working and they’ve decided to stop treatment.”
I drag a hand over my face. Skye must feel as if her legs have been knocked out from beneath her. Even though she doesn’t have any love loss for Brandi, that hasn’t stopped her from having a close relationship with Dean.
I almost forget about Jax until his heavy hand lands on my shoulder. “I’m serious, dude. You mess with her and I’ll come for you.”
“I know you will.” My lips quirk at the corners. “Thanks for telling me.”
He jerks his head into a nod and takes off, leaving me alone in the crowded hallway.
Two months ago, I let all the hurt and anger that had been festering beneath the surface get in the way of my better judgment. For all I know, it’s too late to reverse the damage I’ve inflicted. But none of that matters anymore. What Skye needs now is my friendship and support. She’s the one who helped me through one of the most brutal times in my life, I need to return the favor. Once an idea takes root, I head to my house and pick up my car. Then I drive over to Skye’s townhouse and rap my knuckles against the door.
One minute slowly ticks into two without an answer. So I knock again and don’t stop. My knuckles hit the wood over and over again until they feel bruised and tender.
When I don’t think I can stand another moment, the door flies open, and Skye stands before me in a yellow tank top and navy sleep shorts. Her hair is a wild tangle around her head and her eyes are red and puffy from crying. She’s an absolute mess, but she’s the most beautiful girl I’ve ever laid eyes on.
“Hunter,” she looks less than thrilled by my presence, “what are you doing here?”
“I wanted to make sure that you were all right.” My voice drops. “Jax told me about your dad. I’m sorry.”
Fresh tears gather in her eyes and my heart cracks wide open. This girl has always been my weakness. All I want to do is pull her into my arms and comfort her. Before I can do that, she slams the door in my face. I wedge my foot between the wood and the frame, and it bounces off of my athletic shoe.
Skye stumbles back a step as I push the door open. “I don’t know what you think you’re doing, but you need to leave!”
I shake my head and hold my ground. “I’m not going anywhere.”
With a grunt of anger, she flies forward and throws all her weight against the door, but her strength is no match for mine. It doesn’t take much to overpower her.
Even though Skye must know this battle is futile, it doesn’t stop her from trying with all her might. “Go away and leave me alone,” she growls.
“I’m sorry, I can’t do that.” She may not want me, but she needs me. Somehow, I have to do the impossible and prove that I won’t hurt her again.
When her strength wanes, she lets go with a soft cry and the door flies open, bouncing off the rubber stopper.
Skye screws her eyes shut as if it’s possible to block out the world. Or maybe just me. “Please, Hunter, I can’t do this with you right now.” A pathetic sob breaks free. “I just can’t.”
“I know.” I step inside the townhouse and quietly close the door behind me. “I’m sorry for what you’re going through. All I want to do is help.” I pause for a beat. “Can you let me do that?”
She shakes her head furiously as tears leak from the corners of her eyes before rolling down her face. “I want to be alone.”
All it takes is one long-legged stride for me to swallow up the distance that separates us. I reach out and cup her cheeks in the palm of my hands before tipping her face upward. Teardrops hang off her lashes as she glares. “Get dressed, we’re going out.”
Renewed fire flashes in her eyes as she shakes her head. “I’m not going anywhere with you. I’m tired, I want to sleep.” She points to the entryway. “Leave.”
“Sorry, can’t do that.” I turn my wrist and glance at my sports watch. “You’ve got two minutes to change, otherwise I’ll carry you out the way you are.” I shrug. “Either way, you’re coming with me.”
Skye bristles with irritation before batting my hands away. “I told you already, I’m not going anywhere but back to bed.”
I look at my watch again before flicking my gaze to hers. “You’ve already pissed away one minute. Do you want to waste anymore?”
“You need to go!” When I don’t leave, she stomps her bare foot. “I’m serious! You can’t come in here and order me—”
“Time’s up.”
“What? No!”
Ignoring her protests, I drop my shoulder and wrap my arms around her waist. She lands against my body with a soft grunt. I’m trying to be as gentle as I can but she’s fighting me every step of the way. Skye is in so much pain that she can’t see straight. Her fists pound against my lower back as she calls me every dirty word she’s ever heard. I’m almost impressed with the foul language that rolls off her tongue.
When she’s secured over my shoulder, I swing around and head for the door.
“This is kidnapping!” she screeches at the top of her lungs. “I’m going to call the police and then you’re going to get it! They arrest people for shit like this!”
“How are you going to do that without a phone?”
“You’re a real bastard, you know that?” she yells, battering me with her fists.
“Yup, totally aware of the character flaw. But I’m going to make it up to you.”
“By kidnapping me? Are you out of your mind?”
I mull over the question. “I don’t think so, but anything’s possible.”
“I hate you, Hunter. I really do.”
Her words are like poisonous darts against my skin. As much as they hurt, I deserve them and so much more. Sorrow fills me until it’s almost too much to bear.
“No, you don’t,” I say softly. “Your heart is breaking. Your dad is sick, and he isn’t going to get better.” I pause. “Let me help you through this, Skye.”
The fight drains from her body and she goes slack. Quiet sobs fill the air. All I want is to pull her into my arms and console her, but I need to get her out of here first. Once we reach my car, I lean down and yank open the door handle before carefully lowering her onto the passenger seat. Skye avoids my gaze as I click the belt into place. After she’s locked inside the vehicle, I jog around to the other side and slide in beside her. I shove the key in the ignition and turn it. A second later, the Mustang purrs to life.
As we pull out of the parking lot, she asks through stiff lips, “Why are you doing this?”
I chance a look in her direction, but her gaze stays trained on
the windshield. “You need me.”
A bitter laugh falls from her lips. “You’re the last person I need. All you’ve done is hurt me.”
My shoulders sink under the heavy weight of her words. “I know.”
Her head falls back against the headrest before she turns away from me. There are no more questions. It pains me to see Skye so broken.
I take her to the only place I imagine will help.
The water.
The ten-minute drive to the beach is made in silence. As I pull along the side of the road, Skye lifts her head and glances at the ocean. Bright sunlight glints off the waves as they roll toward the shore.
With quick fingers, I peel off my shoes and socks before hopping out of the car. I keep my eye on her as I move around to the passenger side. I’m half-afraid she’ll take her chances and make a run for it, but she remains seated. I toss the keys in the glove compartment and unclip her belt before scooping her into my arms.
This time, she doesn’t put up a fight.
With her body cradled against me, I slam the door shut and head to the boardwalk that leads to the beach. Skye slips her arms around my neck and burrows her face against my chest. Her warm breath feathers over my throat. I tighten my arms around her, wishing it was possible to steal her pain and make it my own.
Once I hit the sand, I don’t stop. The tide is out, leaving behind a vast expanse of damp beach in its wake. Shells decorate the sand and crack beneath my feet. It takes a minute for the water to lap at my toes and swirl around my ankles before being dragged out again. As much as I hate the ocean, I keep moving at a steady pace. I walk until the cool liquid rushes around my calves. My heart explodes in my chest, beating harder. Faster. The pounding fills my ears as the waves brush against my thighs before gradually climbing to my hips.
A gasp slides from Skye’s lips when the water touches her. I don’t remember the last time I was out this far. It must have been before the accident. There’s a part of me that wants to turn around and get the hell out of here, but I continue until the waves are lapping at my chest. Skye’s grip tightens as the water surrounds us. When she bursts into tears, I reposition her until her legs can wrap around my waist and her head can rest against my shoulder.
One gut wrenching sob is all it takes for the floodgates to open. I hold her close as she releases her heartbreak. Grief slides down her face before getting swept away by the ocean. We stay in the water until her tears run dry, until she has nothing more to give.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Skye
W e lay stretched out on oversized towels that Hunter grabbed from the trunk of his car. Other than a few people strolling past us, we have the beach to ourselves. I close my eyes and listen to the sound of the water lapping against the shore and the seagulls crying overhead. The wind slides over my face as the sun’s warmth strokes my cheeks. Things that would normally bring me peace, aren’t enough to mend the tattered fragments of my heart.
I will never be whole again.
Exhaustion overtakes me, making it difficult to pick up my head or even suck in breath. I want nothing more than to dissolve into the sand and become nothing. Maybe then everything won’t feel quite so painful. The thought of not being able to see Dad or pick up the phone and call him leaves me feeling lost. As if I’m no longer tethered to the earth.
I’m not ready for this.
I will never be ready to say goodbye.
That thought breaks my heart all over again.
Hunter shifts next to me and the heat radiating from his body is a reminder that I’m not alone. Our towels are arranged side-by-side and his head rests near mine. There’s something about his steady inhalations that I find comforting.
“Do you feel any better?” he asks softly.
I crack my eyes open and the bright sunlight blinds me. My eyelids flutter against the harshness of it before my pupils adjust. My world has been painted in an ugly shade of gray and all this vibrancy feels excruciating.
Hunter turns his face toward mine and I feel the heavy weight of his stare pinning me to the towel. I shrug and remain silent. There are no words for the way I feel.
“You know,” he says quietly, “I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye to Mom and Dad. They were here one day and gone the next.”
I swallow past the thick lump that has wedged itself in my throat. I know exactly how painful the death of Hunter’s parents was for him. The suddenness of it left a catastrophic impact that reverberated for years. It was almost impossible for him to find closure and move on.
“As fucked-up as the diagnosis is,” he says, “I’m glad that you get this time to spend with your dad. Every day that he’s here is a gift. You have the chance to tell him everything that’s important, everything you want him to know. And when it’s finally time to say goodbye, you get to do that, too.”
The air rushes from my lungs in an agonizing burst that leaves me gasping.
“Maybe you’ll get more time than the doctors think or maybe it’ll be less, but the point is that you get time. You have no idea how precious that is. Don’t squander it, Skye. I know everything feels like shit right now but be grateful for the time you’ve been given, because once it’s gone, there’s no getting it back.”
My voice is barely a croak when I whisper, “I can’t think about it like that.” Tears leak from the corners of my eyes as I turn away from him and curl into a tight ball. “It hurts too much. I’m barely able to get through each day as it is.”
In the time it takes for me to suck in a shuddering breath, Hunter curls his body around mine, cocooning me in his strength. I don’t want to find comfort in his presence, but I do. The way he holds me is achingly familiar. When the sobs turn into more of a torrent, his grip tightens. It keeps me grounded in the here and now, so I don’t blow away in the breeze.
“I know, baby, I know. Let me help you through this.”
He brushes the hair away from my neck before pressing a kiss against the delicate flesh.
I roll onto my back and stare into his eyes. There were times when I thought I would drown in the utter blueness of them. Even though nothing is the same between us, they still hold the same power over me. He strokes my face tenderly before kissing the teardrops from my cheeks.
“If I could take away your pain, I would.”
I shake my head, knowing that’s not possible. The grief that fills me is so consuming, I’m not sure if I will ever find my way out of it.
“Tell me what you need,” he pleads.
There’s no way for me to answer that question, because it doesn’t feel like anything can save me from the darkness that is pressing in on me.
When I remain silent, he says, “I’m here for you. I will always be here for you.”
I lift my hands and trace the sharp angles of his face. He presses into my touch as if he needs the contact as much as I do.
“Just hold me,” I whisper. “Please.”
Hunter scoops me into his arms and presses me tightly against his chest. Only then am I able to block out everything but the steady thumping of his heart. My world shrinks until that’s all I’m conscious of. And in that sound, I finally find comfort.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Hunter
A s soon as I step foot in the small lecture hall, I scour the area for Skye, but she remains conspicuously absent. I drop onto my usual seat before slipping my phone from my backpack and firing off a text to Lanie. Since Skye has gone back to avoiding me, I’ve been getting all my intel from her best friend. Lanie and I are now texting buddies.
I set the phone down and drum my fingers on the desk while waiting for a response. It doesn’t take long for her to get back to me.
Chill out, stalker-boy. She’s on her way.
She adds an eyeroll emoji. Then a second message rolls in.
Good luck.
Yeah, I’m going to need it.
A few moments after the texts pop up on my screen, Skye rushes through the door before sliding
onto her seat next to Jaxon.
Now that she’s here, I can calm down and focus for the next fifty minutes. Well, that’s the plan. Dr. Bennet isn’t exactly the most scintillating of public speakers. Throughout the class, my attention wanders and I find myself glancing over my shoulder to see what Skye is up to. Not once does her gaze drift my way. She studiously avoids me the entire time. It’s like I’m not even there.
If it weren’t for Lanie, I wouldn’t know what the hell was going on. I’m trying to respect Skye’s wishes by giving her time and space. I realize that’s what she needs from me right now, but it’s difficult when all I want is to be near her.
From what I’ve been able to get out of Lanie, Skye is still having a rough time of it. If she’s not attending classes or visiting her dad, she’s locked in her room. She’s closed herself off from the people who care most about her.
I’d thought we’d made a small breakthrough at the beach, but that turned out not to be the case. It’s been two weeks since we’ve talked.
Lanie’s new nickname for me is stalker-boy. Unfortunately, it fits. That’s exactly what I’ve become. For the time being, all I can do is hover on the periphery of her life.
Once Bennet dismisses us for the day, I pack up my stuff and head for the door. I’m surprised to find that Skye has already disappeared from the room when I wasn’t looking.
Damn that girl is fast.
I hurry into the hall and search for her blond head before shoving my way through the crowd. All of my muscles tighten as I pull alongside her. I have no idea what kind of reception my presence is going to be met with.
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