by Erica M Kim
“I’ve already come to learn he’s a man who gets what he wants.”
“Shit. You’ve met with him already?” Markus rubs his hand down his face with a heavy breath. “What does he know about you?”
“He knows my name. You told me not to lie to him, so I told him the truth. He knows I own a dog-grooming salon. He found my phone number.”
“Motherfucker.”
“Couldn’t you have just texted or called me about this?” Exasperation and impatience harden my tone.
“We need to have all discussions like this face-to-face. I don’t take risks with someone like Vincent.”
“I appreciate your concern, Markus, but I got this covered. Thanks for the info.” I spin around and leave. As I’m turning, Markus grabs my arm. I freeze in my tracks.
“Get. Your. Hand. Off. Me.” My voice is filled with quiet rage. He obeys.
“I’m serious, Lunis. You need to be careful. If you have a family or loved ones, be extra careful to keep an eye out on them. Better yet, keep your distance from them until this assignment is done. Vincent is a possessive man. Once he claims you, he’ll want you for his and his alone. You understand?” Markus’s eyes show genuine concern.
“I don’t know if you’re being overly cautious about your investment right now, or if this is because of something else. But for the last time, don’t worry about me.” I walk away toward the street. The fact that Vincent knows someone is coming after him isn’t a good sign, but it isn’t the first time this has happened. Most high-powered, dangerous men always seem to believe someone is out to get them. And usually, it’s true.
A quick pitstop at PetSmart on the way back acts as my alibi, and I pick up an industrial-sized flea dip. By the time I return to the shop, Lio is almost done with his dog, and Ramon is washing our last client of the day.
An hour later, Ramon is gone; we clean up and each take a shower. Once I lock up the shop, we stroll toward the beach. It is a perfect beach day, and to my luck, I had a pair of shorts and sneakers stored at work. I hope Lio isn’t blinded by the sun’s reflection from my stark white legs.
After carefully debating over the best spot on the sand that offers privacy, we set down the towels that we brought from my shop. Stretched out side by side on our stomachs, we’re both quiet for several minutes. There’s not a care in the world other than soaking up the indulgent sun. The sound of ocean waves rolling in sooth away all tension. Utter contentment is the only description. Without much warning, I feel Lio’s hand caressing my back, and I sigh. He strokes the top of my back down to the bottom, and I make a purring sound. Before I know it, I doze off.
“Baby, you’ve been napping long enough,” I hear Lio’s warm, seductive voice say. I always despised couples that call each other “baby,” but I love hearing it from Lio. I’m such a hypocrite.
“How long was I out for?”
“An hour.”
“Shit. Sorry. You should have woken me up earlier.” I check my mouth to make sure I’m in the clear of any drool.
“No way. You looked so peaceful. I enjoyed watching you, but it’s getting colder . . . and I miss hearing your voice.”
“No, you don’t. You’re just bored.” I give him a playful push.
“Okay, maybe.” He falls back and pulls me close to him. I’m nestled between the crook of his shoulder and body. I could spend all of eternity here.
“If you could wish for anything in the world right now, what would it be?” Lio asks suddenly as we both stare into the sky, now slightly tinged with shades of cotton candy pink. Uh oh. Inquisitive Lio is out again.
“Oh . . . that’s a tough one.” I know the answer immediately, of course. I want to be normal. I want so badly to live a normal life, unaffected by the ever-mutating moon. I want to have peace. I want to live without fear. I want to love.
“I want . . .”
“You want what?” How can I put this into words without sounding completely crazy?
“I want you,” I quietly say as I climb on top of Lio, my lips finding his. I kiss him passionately, like my life depends on it. It’s true, what I said. Lio represents everything that I can’t have. Someone I would destroy with my own monstrosity. And it feels like my soul is breaking apart every time I think about it. My hands reach for Lio’s soft hair and pull his head back so I can kiss him more deeply.
Lio’s hands are on my hips and holding me down, and I feel his hips grinding against mine. Mother. Of. The. Gods. I feel him hardening against me, and all I’m going to say is that I’m apprehensive about the sheer size of what I’m feeling. Without my approval, my own body responds, and my hips are grating against Lio’s begging for more. I don’t even care if we’re in a public space, looking like two desperate teenagers. I want this man now.
A few seconds of heaven later, Lio pulls away. We’re both literally panting. His eyes are glazed over with lust, and we stare at each other intently like two starving predators in the African safari as the moment passes. I roll off of Lio with the last might of self-control, settle back in the crook of his arm.
“Next time you do that, I’m not going to be able to stop.” Lio breaks the silence.
“I didn’t want you to stop,” I say even though I know he was right to stop. Lio doesn’t even know that I’m still a virgin, and losing my v-card in public doesn’t sound appealing at all.
“Should we look for something to eat soon?” Lio asks as if desperately looking to change the subject. I don’t blame him
“I already made a reservation at a French restaurant. And you’re not getting away without answering the same question, Lio. If you could have anything in the world, right now, what would it be?”
Lio gets up and begins to fold up his towel before he answers me, building up anticipation. I don’t get up and just stare up at him expectantly for his answer. He finally turns around and looks at me seriously.
“I want to live a normal life and live happily ever after.”
21
My mind is still reeling from Lio’s answer as we amble quietly to the restaurant. I can’t help but finally break the silence with my curiosity begging to be appeased.
“What did you mean you want to live a normal life and live happily ever after? Why couldn’t you have that easily?”
Lio stops in his tracks and forces me to look at him before he answers. His eyes are brimming with sincerity, and my breath catches.
“My life is a lot more complicated than most. My family . . . and the situation that I’m in is not easy to explain. There are a lot of obligations and expectations.”
“How?”
“Well, aren’t you so curious today? In due time, baby. In due time. For now, let’s just enjoy each other’s company, okay?”
I nod, but I’m nowhere near content with his answer. My only assumption is that running a large corporation like M.M.S. must be what Lio is referring to. If he hasn’t taken a vacation in over five years, what must his life really be like? Whatever I’m experiencing right now must be a little sliver of sanctioned heaven that inevitably won’t last. Lio’s “real” life likely doesn’t have room for anyone, let alone me. Maybe that’s a good thing because the same goes for my own life. I don’t have room for anyone else. Perhaps a week’s worth of love is all I deserve. And in this case, I’ll take it with two hands, and deal with the aftermath later. But I already know the aftermath is going to be something like toxic waste cleanup in HAZMAT suits. I force my mind to shove the negative thoughts out of my brain and focus on the now like Lio asked.
The upscale restaurant is just a few blocks down from my shop. After ordering a bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon, Lio reaches over and takes my hand. He looks deeply and seriously into my eyes. I am completely transfixed.
“I know this might be a little surprising to you, but I just want you to know that when I’m with you, I feel like I’m at home. I’ve been alone for a very, very long time,” he says as he looks sincerely embarrassed. “I can just feel it. When I’m with y
ou, something just feels right.”
I feel exactly the same. In fact, I could have repeated those precise words to him and meant it from the bottom of my heart.
“I know, Lio, I feel the same.”
Before this milestone conversation can continue, Lio’s phone rings. Damn it! After a moment of looking at the screen with a scowl, he looks at me.
“Sorry, I have to take this.”
“It’s okay. Go ahead.” I lean back against the chair as my glass is filled with wine by the waiter.
“Daniel, this better be important. I told you that no one should interrupt me unless it’s an absolute emergency,” Lio says in a harsh voice that’s foreign to me.
I can’t hear what this Daniel person is saying, but Lio’s face contorts with anger. I’m momentarily taken aback that his kind, warm face could know such fury. I’ll have to remind myself to avoid ever being confronted by this side of Lio.
“What?!” Lio brings his hand to his temples before abruptly getting up from our table and mouths “sorry.” He holds up his index finger to signal he’ll be back in a minute and leaves the restaurant.
I take the opportunity to survey the menu and decide to order for the both of us—Dungeness crab cakes in a green zucchini chutney, sweet corn ravioli in a mascarpone truffle cream, Peruvian gnocchi herb infused in tomato, caramelized pork chops with spiced apple chutney and filet of beef. The waiter takes my order and leaves me alone. I try not to appear too awkward or bored and fiddle with my phone in a pathetic attempt to distract myself. For the first time in a long, long time, being alone feels weird.
The crab cakes and ravioli arrive, and after what feels like an eternity, Lio finally returns back to the table. I try not to look annoyed.
“I’m so sorry, Lunis.”
“So did Daniel report a true emergency?”
“He did.” But he doesn’t indulge me with any details. “Wow, this is delicious,” he says after taking a bite of the sweet corn ravioli. I decide not to press him about the call since he seems like he doesn’t want to talk about it.
“It is. Try this.” I hold a forkful of the meaty crab cake.
“Mmm. So good.” He finishes chewing and taking in a healthy sip of wine before continuing. “Do you want to take a trip with me tomorrow?”
“After the shop closes? Don’t you need to go to Greece on Thursday?”
“I arranged for the shop to be run by someone else tomorrow. Daniel will find someone trustworthy to help Ramon.”
“What?! Lio, you can’t just do that.” My hands clench into tight fists as I seethe with anger. He does not get to just come into my life and make decisions about my business. No fucking way.
“Please?” His eyes beg me sincerely as he reaches out for one of my hands. “Come with me. This will be our last day together before I travel to Greece. It would really mean a lot.”
“I don’t know, Lio . . .Where would we be going anyway?” As I say this, my irritation is already fading.
“San Francisco for a quick business meeting. Then to the Manos winery in Napa. Please, baby. I want you there with me. I need you there.” And with this last beg, I concede to his wishes, despite my better judgment. Something about Lio makes me break all of my rules.
“Don’t we have to book flights? Are there even any flights available?” Quite frankly, I haven’t been on a plane for over a decade. I don’t even remember what the inside of an airport looks like.
“We’ll take my jet.” Holy shit.
“Oh,” I say casually, trying not to sound too impressed. “What time are we leaving?”
“I’ll pick you up at seven o’clock? Is that okay? I have a meeting at ten.”
Nodding, I move onto more important things. “We need to talk about who is going to help Ramon at Hair of the Dog. I need to tell them what needs to be done. Are they trustworthy? A lot of questions need to be answered.”
“Of course. Daniel will call later tonight with all the details.”
“And what am I going to do while you have your meeting?”
“Well, I was thinking Daniel can show you around San Francisco during my meeting, it’s only for an hour. Then we’ll have lunch with my sister.”
“Alex?”
“Yeah,” Lio says with a smile. “Then, we’ll head to Manos Winery.”
Anxiety creeps down to the pit of my stomach and settles there. Tomorrow’s last-minute excursion not only throws off my routine, but the thought of meeting Lio’s sister makes me nervous. What would she be like? Will she like me? Is she going to hate me? What if I hate her? And what about my assignment?
“What’s wrong?” Lio asks. “You look worried. You don’t want to go? Are you worried about the shop? Daniel will find someone who will be great.” Lio reaches over and smooths the crease between my eyebrows with his thumb.
“Well, I already told you how averse I am to spontaneity, Lio. But that’s not it. Believe it or not, I think I’m getting sort of used to it. I am worried about Hair of the Dog, but I know you’ll make sure someone trustworthy comes to help . . .” I push my fork around a ruptured ravioli. “I’m a little anxious to meet your sister,” I finally admit.
“Alex?” Lio asks incredulously then laughs heartily. “Lunis, you’re going to love Alex, and I’m afraid you guys will be become too close of friends for my own good!” Lio notices that I’m not completely convinced. “Seriously, baby. Don’t worry about that of all things.”
“I have to tell you something, and I don’t want you to laugh.”
“I would never laugh at you,” Lio says, trying to look innocent.
“Yes, you would, ass.”
“I won’t laugh, I promise.”
I take a healthy swig of wine. I don’t know how to say this without feeling entirely embarrassed, but it’s better that I tell Lio earlier than later.
“I’ve never dated anyone before,” I say quickly with a big exhale of breath. There. Done.
“Well, that explains a lot of things.” My heart drops to the floor when I hear this. I wonder how much of a fool I’ve been making of myself. I look up into Lio’s eyes and see a crinkle of laughter. “I’m just joking, Lunis!”
“I told you not to laugh, Lio. This is embarrassing. I’m twenty-four years old, and I have never seriously dated anyone.”
“Not a single date?”
“Okay, maybe I went on a few dates with a guy once, but it didn’t mean much. Other than that, no! That’s why it’s a big deal for me to meet your sister.” I look away, feeling my face warming up to the same color as one of the caramelized beets on my plate.
Lio must have realized the gravity of my shame because his demeanor changes as he reaches out for my hand.
“Hey, look at me. I don’t care that you’ve never dated anyone. I wouldn’t care if you slept with hundreds of men. Okay, maybe I would, just a little. But your past is your past, Lunis. I would never, ever judge you for who you are, and what you’ve done.” Lio’s eyes are shining with sincerity, and I can’t help but be enraptured by his words. I hope to the gods that he means them.
After dinner—which I successfully paid for—we walk down Santa Monica Boulevard, in the direction of Hair of the Dog, and my hand is in Lio’s. He strokes the inside of my palm gently, and I am happier than I can ever remember. Lio starts humming an unrecognizable song, and my ears perk up in efforts to hear him. His voice is a deep, soothing bass, and I’m positive that he likely has an amazing singing voice. Is there anything on earth that this man can’t do?
I concentrate on this very moment. Holding Lio’s warm hand, the fullness of my content stomach, the sensual scent of the ocean, and of course, the glistening moon displayed across its reflective, rippled mirror. This is a moment that no one can take away from me. It is mine. And I will cherish it for the rest of my life. I take a mental snapshot of all the things about tonight and store it deep in a secure compartment of my brain, where I know I will replay it again and again in the future when it has become a distant
, sad memory.
When we arrive in front of where my car is parked, the place where we will say our goodbyes, and the night air thickens once more. My body automatically responds, and I want nothing more than to drag Lio inside and have my way with him. All night. I brave a glance into his eyes and see lust brewing in his eyes too. My attraction for him is unending, like the velvet, dark skies.
Lio pulls me into an embrace, and I’m swallowed whole into his arms. My body tingles with his closeness as I press against him. A magnetic force seems to bind my body to his; I feel like I can stay here forever. Lio gently kisses my forehead and whispers, “I want you so badly, Lunis. I don’t understand how it’s even possible to feel this way about someone else. All I want to do is devour you whole—your body, heart, and soul.”
There’s nothing I say because I feel exactly the same way. I reach around his neck, and my mouth envelopes Lio’s soft lips, my tongue in a desperate frenzy to dance with his. Feeling brave, I grind my hips against Lio’s, and I hear a low growl from Lio’s throat, which turns me on even more. Fuck it. I just want this man. Here. Now. Many times. I don’t care.
I twine my fingers in his soft hair and press my body closer to his, so I can kiss him more deeply and passionately. Lio’s hands travel down my back as he presses against me. A whimper escapes from my throat. His right hand starts exploring me. Traveling up my waist, inside my shirt, and begins to caress my ribcage. One more inch and he would reach my breasts. But he’s a gentleman, and he stops there. No!
Lio presses his forehead against mine gasping, with no response, although I can feel how turned on he is against my waist. And I’m pretty damn impressed again.
After a deep sigh, he finally speaks. “Get home safely. You need to get rest, and we have an early-morning flight. If we start this tonight, I won’t be able to stop at just once.”