by Maya Riley
Arms wrapped around me from behind, stirring me out of my thoughts. The smell of lemons wrapped around me and I leaned back into J.D.’s chiseled chest, enjoying being surrounded by his scent.
“You about ready?” he asked.
“Yup,” I answered. “Just making sure I got everything.”
Ryan walked over at that point and began to look around. He peered under every rock and behind every twig, and every nook and cranny he could find. “Looks like we got everything,” he announced. “The others are all waiting. We got everything packed up. Including the coffee. Whether grounds or instant, we made sure not to leave that behind.” He winked at me.
J.D. kissed the top of my head and unwrapped his arms before leading me away. We met everyone else and made sure everything was accounted for.
Dave, Stan, Carrie, Jenna, and Gary were all huddled together, talking in low murmurs. I signaled to them, and we all began to head out, beginning the hike to our starting point.
When we reached the wall, I gawked up at its magnificence. Now this was climbing the Carbolitas.
Jenna
“Uh, Cam, before we get started,” I hedged, and watched as her head turned toward me and her eyes bore into mine, curious with a hint of worry. “This is as far as I’m going.”
Her eyes widened in shock. “What…”
I rushed to explain. “My arm is more injured than I thought it was. I can barely lift it, let alone climb.” My throat closed off at the words and my eyes welled with tears, but I still forced the words out. “I’m so sorry, Cam. I so badly wanted to do this with you. I was in denial, hoping it would be much better by now, but it’s not.” I looked down at my feet, where my tears were already begging to puddle in the dirt around my shoes. “I’ve talked with the rangers, and they’re going to helicopter me to the top on the day you’re predicted to arrive.” I looked up and could see water welling at the corners of her eyes as well. “So, I’ll still be up there to watch you make it to the top. I’ll still be with you on the top of the world. I just won’t be able to help you get any farther than this, and I’m so sorry.”
Cam ran forward and engulfed me in the tightest hug we’d ever had. I broke down, letting all the tears fall as fast and hard as they wanted to. She gripped me tight, like she never wanted to let go. But she’d have to, it was the only way to continue going forward.
“I don’t want to do this without you,” she lamented.
“You can and you will,” I stated. “You’re going to continue to do great things, and this is only one of the many steps you’ll take. Not everybody can climb to the top of the world with you. Keep moving up and keep being strong.”
We held on for a few more seconds, neither of us wanting to let go, but eventually we did. I held on to her as we pulled apart, and pressed my thumb to the corner of her eye to wipe away some stray tears.
“Now,” I began, sniffling, “go up this mountain and do what you were always meant to do. Get up there and climb the damn thing.”
She gave a small laugh. “I will go up there and climb the damn thing.”
We smiled at each other before parting. “Take care,” she called, “and don’t make that arm any worse. I expect some real competition when we get back to the gym, so I can kick your ass.”
I let out a laugh. “There you go, there’s the Cam we all know and love.”
Cam smirked and tied in. She stood there, looking up at the wall while chalking up her hands. A moment later, she was climbing so well, she’d give Spider Man a run for his name.
A hand landed on my shoulder and I looked up into Dave’s piercing blue eyes. “You doing alright?” he asked, concern evident in his tone.
I smiled. “Yeah, I’m alright.”
“I could stay here with you and meet them at the top.”
Ice-cold shock flooded my veins. The look in his eyes told me he was serious. “N-No,” I stammered, “there’s no reason for that. This is all me. I’ll see you at the top.”
He gave my shoulder a small squeeze and turned around. Two steps out, he paused and turned back. Before I knew it, I was being engulfed in the sweetest kiss I’d ever experienced. “Stay safe,” he said once we pulled apart.
I nodded. “I’ll see you at the top.”
Cam
Leaving some of the people I cared about most down on the ground was the hardest part of this trip yet. It was even more difficult than seeing my parents together in the cabin when I walked in, it was harder than them saying they were going to stick around and support me, it was tougher than when I’d injured my wrist and worried about whether or not I would be able to continue. It was just hard. Leaving them behind wasn’t what I’d trained for. All I knew how to do was to go up, so continuing to go up was what I would do.
The small crimp holds of the wall bit into the tips of my fingers as I reached, grabbed, and pulled myself up. Small beads of blood began to collect on my hands, but I kept going. Giving blood to the wall was just part of the climb.
The eight of us that were still continuing up were doing this on two lines, rather than the three we’d originally intended. Gary was leading the route next to me, and we were nearly neck and neck. I’d be damned if I was going to let him beat me to the top though, so I pushed harder. Not that it was a race, really. I was fairly certain none of the others would actually reach the top before I did. They were all such gentlemen.
Once I reached the two bolts that signaled the first anchor spot, I unclipped two draws from my harness, clipped them onto the bolts, hooked the rope through, and let J.D. hold my weight since he was currently on belay. This anchor set was conveniently placed above a ledge, so I was able to stand rather than just hang from the wall. It would make this section a bit easier for the belayer.
Then, I unhooked the slings attached to my harness, clipped them in, called to J.D. to loosen the slack, untied my rope, and hung there, threading the rope through the rings and back down to the ground for the next person to follow on top rope.
I enjoyed the view while I waited, looking around. Gary was locked into his anchor point as well, and threw me a cheeky grin and a salute before looking back down to his companions. Before I knew it, Ryan was joining me on the ledge.
“Fancy meeting you here,” he said, with the widest, most cheesy grin. “Do you hang around these parts often?”
I busted out laughing. That was the single most hilarious pickup line I’d ever heard, and I was pretty sure that was because it came from Ryan’s mouth. These guys sure had a way of making me laugh.
After anchoring himself in, he immediately went for a kiss and a sneak boob grab. I pulled away from his mouth and his lips turned up into a prideful smile. He wasn’t at all sorry for feeling me up on this climb. He then turned and looped the rope through the rings, before tossing it back down.
“Well, if that’s how you say hello, I may need to up my game for the next time,” I replied with a mischievous grin. “If you do a boob grab, maybe I’ll do a ball grab.”
Ryan’s mouth dropped, ready to protest, but I turned slightly so I could see the next person below.
I saw long, dark hair tied in a bandana coming up next. That was Carson, and I eagerly waited for him to get here with us, but we needed to keep moving so the pitch anchors wouldn’t get too crowded.
“I must admit, I was impressed with my parents’ perseverance. I honestly thought they’d touch the wall and then turn right back around,” I told Ryan. “I’m really glad they decided to give this a shot and get as far as they could.”
“I’m not at all surprised. They had the greatest motivator out of anyone—you,” he said. “Attempting the difficult is what we thrive on.”
I nodded and gave a small smile. While it would take time for my small family to heal, at least we were on track. My only hope was that things would continue to improve when we got back on the ground.
Eventually, Carson made it up and anchored in next to us. After the brief break, Ryan took the rope out of his bag, w
hich was heavy as fuck for him to climb with—it was like a thirty pound rope along with his pack—and he hooked himself into the rope with his Grigri. We were off to the side a few feet over from the first route, so we could drop the rope down below without it hitting anyone else. For now, it would sit on the ledge for the first stretch so I wouldn’t have added weight pulling me down. The ledge we were on was too small for three people and a rope.
I quickly tied myself in and checked us both over. Gripping on to the wall, I hopped up about a foot and stuck a cam into a crack as far up as I could reach to make a safety point for accidental falling. Next, I added a draw, hooked the rope in, and then lowered myself back to the ledge. Now ready for climbing, I unhooked myself from the anchor point and reattached them to the loops on the sides of my harness.
“Climbing,” I called.
“Climb on,” Ryan replied, pulling out the slack.
I reached my arms up, stuck my fingers into the fissures of the mountainside, dug my feet higher into the earth, and pushed and pulled myself up. I repeated the motions, graceful and smooth, never once faltering.
I climbed higher, the anticipation of all these years coming full circle. The excitement bubbling up in my chest was almost too much to bear, every moment of this whole trip leading to this. Now, I would stay on the wall until I finished. There was no going back, only going up.
Wrapping my hand around a good rock hold, I reached toward my harness to pull off a nut and stuck it in a crack. I tugged on it to test it and it didn’t budge, so I added a draw and clipped the rope in. The downside to leading was the pressure of making sure each and every piece was safe for myself and all the climbers behind me. I was responsible for making sure every single piece of equipment was placed correctly and would hold if someone fell. The worst thing that could ever happen would be for someone to fall and then the device not catch them. I shook my head a little bit, trying to keep the horrible memories at bay.
Every single hand and foot placement was very particular. The higher I went, the more careful I was.
Pretty soon, I reached the anchor point and hooked in. Taking a deep breath, I sent my end of the rope back down for the next climber and looked out at the view. The kind of view you could only witness with your feet dangling thousands of feet in the air.
On the route next to me, Gary had just reached his anchor points. He clipped himself in and gave me a double-thumbs up to go with his massive, lopsided grin.
A bit later, Carson was behind me, clipping into the anchors. He greeted me with a wet, slobbery kiss to the cheek.
“Ewww,” I teased, using my shoulder to wipe away the excess sweat and slobber. “Warn a girl before drowning her in bodily fluids.”
He stared at me and my eyes widened when I realized what I’d said. “No, no, no, no. You know what I meant.”
“Yeah, I did.” His eyebrows waggled uncontrollably. “By the way, I love watching you climb.”
“Why is that? Because you get to stare at my ass?”
“Precisely,” he said. “I like to take advantage of the best part of belaying someone—staring at their ass while they risk their life to climb one of the toughest mountains.”
I looked at him. “You weren’t belaying me on this one, Ryan was.”
“That doesn’t mean I still can’t take advantage of it.”
I bent over, laughing, and a searing pain crossed my forehead as it scraped along the rock. “Ow,” I gasped through my wheezing fit of laughter.
“Dammit, Cam, don’t injure yourself any more.”
He reached into the side pocket of his pack and pulled out a Band-Aid. “Now, stop moving so much while I put this on. Can’t have you bleeding from the head the whole way up.”
I still chuckled, but I managed to remain still while he applied the Band-Aid. “This will be fun to explain to the others,” I murmured. “Carson’s jokes gave me a head injury.”
He snickered and we waited for the others. I did have to agree with the ass staring though, especially now that our feelings and relationships were out in the open.
The best part is, I could now shamelessly stare at my four guys from below. Well, on other climbs where they go up first. Plus, Gary wouldn’t mind that at all. Hell, he’d encourage it. We always had a lot of fun staring at hot guys together. I could stare at Jenna’s ass too, but hers wasn’t quite the same. I mean, it was a good ass and all, but still not the same.
Ryan joined us next with a grunt as he heaved himself up and clipped on to the anchors. J.D. would be the last one of us to get up this route and Ryan would belay him from above while Carson sent me up the final pitch of the day.
We repeated the process, climbing up to the next set of anchors with me leading the way and the guys following behind. This next pitch went the same smooth way as the others, but still held the right amount of challenge I needed to feel successful and pushed.
Ryan was the first to join me and leaned in for a kiss.
“Enjoy the view of my ass?” My question halted him inches from my lips.
“Yup,” he answered, right before closing the distance, and then leaning back with a grin.
The other two joined us with J.D. bringing up the rear. He reached the ledge and anchored himself in. Now, with four people on the ledge, each with their own heavy packs on their back, it was a bit of a tight fit.
We pulled the rope up and hooked it onto J.D.’s pack. Climbing up the wall with a pack full of food and camping gear was one thing, but carrying the rope on top of all that was another. Luckily, it’d only be attached to his pack while we were resting.
“It looks like you’re one nut short,” I observed, counting the gear on his harness. The other two snickered. Boys, they never grow up.
“Yeah, I couldn’t get that last nut out of the crack.”
Ryan and Carson busted out laughing, and I couldn’t blame them. Climbing puns were the best.
“How far down?” I asked.
“A couple feet. I tried, but I couldn’t maneuver my hand right to get it out.”
“Let me try.” I pulled up the climber’s end of the rope and tied in. “Just real quick.”
“Well, there’s no arguing with Cam. Ever,” Carson commented, as he hooked himself into the Grigri and pulled out the slack. We checked each other over, and he lowered me down the couple feet to where the nut was lodged. I stuck my hand in just as I had when I set it in there, twisted it a bit, and it popped free. Clipping it to my harness, I announced, “Got it,” and proceeded to go back up.
Once I got within reaching distance of the ledge, I could see the smiles on their faces. They were pretty excited for our progress.
I was so distracted by their happiness, thinking about how much I wanted to see more of those smiles of utter joy and hope for the near future, that I failed to place my hand correctly in the crack I was reaching for.
“Ahhh!” The only sound that escaped my lips was that silent scream people do when they’re trying to scream, but also attempting to hold it in so only a little bit of noise comes out instead.
I stumbled, trying to turn my wrist back correctly, when my foot slipped. I was barely half a foot away from reaching the anchor when I started to go down. The world around me slowed down and I watched as the rock wall slowly moved away from me, and the rope right above my harness caught on a jagged edge in the process, fraying the rope. One by one, small, frayed pieces of the rope began to slowly pop out.
Ryan and J.D. lunged forward, as far as their slings hooked to the anchors would allow them to go, and threw their hands out, with Ryan managing to wrap them around my own hand. I was then hanging, dangling in the air, only being held up by the guys above me.
I used a little bit of momentum, just enough to snag the tip of my shoes into the mountainside without throwing the guys off balance, and managed to regain my own balance again.
“Cam!” they all exclaimed at once.
I looked down, which was something one should never do in this situati
on. I only had a moment of vertigo before I tamped down the panic and worked to control my breathing. I wasn’t afraid of falling, or even of dying. The thing I was afraid of was having the people I cared most about in the world watching me fall to my death, just like I had to with Clif. Especially with both my parents somewhere around here, waiting. It’d taken them seven years to even begin to heal from that. If it happened to me, it would surely break them for good.
I looked up and smiled, letting them know that everything was alright. Or, at least, that it would be alright once I got back up there to the anchors.
I shook my wrist out, testing it. It was still a bit tender, and I pressed it into the crack. I couldn’t seem to make a fist that could hold my weight for the amount of time needed, so I placed just my fingers in and gripped the crack from a side angle.
I had a little bit better luck with it that way, so I regained my balance. Ryan was still gripping my other hand, and began to pull me up. I pushed up while also leaning a bit to the side, using my hand on the edge of the crack as a bit of leverage to help get me up farther.
Once the top of my head poked up past the ledge, J.D. reached a hand down and wrapped it underneath my armpit. He pulled me up, and Ryan let go and quickly attached my slings into the anchor point one at a time.
Once I was secured in place on the ledge, we all let out an audible breath.
“Damn, Cam,” J.D. murmured.
“Guys, I would’ve been fine. It would’ve only been a fall. We’ve practiced them thousands upon thousands of times,” I stated, defensively.
“Not this kind of fall,” Ryan argued. “It’s different out here. We’d never been this far up. That was the first fall any of us have taken this whole time, and it was damn scary to watch. I don’t care if you were hooked up to top rope, that doesn’t make it any less scary.”
“I’m sorry I scared you.” I placed a kiss on his lips, which had drained of color.
“How’d you slip? It looked like you had that in the bag,” Carson asked.